Makeup. It was such a weird thing. It really only depended on how you used it. Some girls used it to cover up their faces to be pretty. Some used it because of insecurity, some used it because it was available, others to enhance their features.

But people like me used it out of respect. I didn't didn't wear makeup every day, but you knew when I did it was because I cared. I usually only wore it on dates or special occasions. I wore it to show the person or people that they were worth looking good for. That I wanted to look my best around them.

This time, though, I put it on because I felt like I needed to. I didn't really want to, but I felt obliged. So I did.

I slipped my dress on and looked around. Where were my high heels? I couldn't find then anywhere.

Then I remembered. I had left them next door when I had thrown them. I debated whether or not it was worth it. But finally decided that he was probably at work. I would quickly slip in and out.

I grabbed a bobby pin and walked next door.

I fumbled with the pin and lock for about two minutes before it clicked and unlocked.

I walked into the cold dead apartment. I guess I had almost expected everything to be the same as when I left it. But it wasn't. It was clean as could be, almost as if it had been empty for years.

I turned on the light and began my search. I looked everywhere for the heels but couldn't find them. I lost track of time.

Finally, I found them on top of a box in his closet. In the box were some other items.

I took the box out. It had Joanna written sloppily across it. I was so confused. It was decently heavy. But he had already given me a box of the things I had left behind. What was in this box then?

I was about to find out when I heard the door open.

I shoved the box back into the closet and stood up.

I sat there, paralyzed, unable to think or move.

I heard him come near.

"Breaking into my apartment, huh? Now who gets to call the cops?" I heard.

I angrily stood up and turned around.

He saw the heels in my hands.

"Where'd you find those?"he asked, almost worriedly.

"On top of a box", I answered," By the way, what's in that box? Why does it have my name on it?"

"It doesn't matter. Why are you here, anyways?" He asked, not so subtly changing the subject.

"I just came to get my heels", I said.

"You look nice. Where are you going?" He asked.

"On... A... Date", I said, struggling on one foot to put my heels on.

His eyes widened. "A date?"

"Yeah", I answered.

"What kind of date?" He asked more seriously.

"One where you eat food", I said in a 'No duh!' Voice.

"With who?"

"Geesh Sherlock! What's this, the third degree?" I asked, shoving past him and heading towards the door.

He grabbed my arm. "With who?"

"His name is Marshall", I stated.

He laughed. "Marshall? Marshall Williams? That guy? The dirt bag that dated Diane?"

I furrowed my eyebrows. "Who are you to call him a dirt bag? You aren't much better yourself! And besides, he's the politest, sweetest man I've ever met."

"Joanna, you're full of bullsh*t. You know that, right?"

My eyes narrowed even farther. "Excuse me?".

"You know, for a second, I thought you really did mean what you said to me. And here we are, five days later. And you've already moved on".

"I never said that I moved on", I said.

He was about to say something, but I stopped him.

"I'd love to stay and fight with you just like old times, but my date is waiting".

I slammed the door and straightened my dress. How did we manage to fight every time we saw each other?

Ugh. I cleared my mind of any thoughts of him. He had already ruined my life once. And I wasn't about to let him ruin my night.

I put on a huge smile as soon as I neared Marshall. He opened the door for me and kissed my cheek.

I looked around as if some one was watching, but there was no one in sight. Even so, I knew Charlie saw it. And I felt guilty once again.

I shook it off and sat down. He talked sweetly to me the whole way.

I tried my best to enjoy my date, but my thoughts kept wandering to Charlie and the box. Especially the box.

Why was he worried about me seeing it? What was in it? Why was it hidden? Why did it have my name on it? I wanted all these questions answered and fast.

But I knew they wouldn't be answered soon. Maybe never.

I was zoned out the whole time. I answered questions, laughed, and ate, but by the end of the night, I couldn't remember a thing.

He dropped me off at home. "Thanks for coming. I'll see you soon. Goodnight Joanna", he said sweetly.

"Goodnight", was all I said.

I walked back inside and ran to my bed. I didn't bother to take my makeup or hair out. Not even my dress. I just slipped my high heels off and curled up.

Was Charlie right? Was I an awful person? I didn't know anymore. I was so confused. I didn't even know what I wanted.

And all I wanted was someone to tell me who I was and what I wanted. Because I had forgotten.