"Don't you ever think what it'll be like if you never met someone?" Addhya asked, lying her head against my chest as she pulled the blanket tighter against her body. She was surprising cold, her body pressed against me.

As usual her nose was red like every winter. It's most likely due to the cold air and her pale skin. I can't help but tease her for that, calling her Rudolph when it's winter.

"All the time," I admitted. My heart isn't in the words, I was tired. But it was the the truth. I couldn't bring myself to lie to her, it was impossible.

Addhya rolled over, leaning against me. Her eyes sent lost, far away in thought. "Just imagine what happened if we never met," she spoke out her thoughts.

When she said those words, I immediately started listening. What would have happened? One thing is for certain, I wouldn't have been married at all. I had no plans of getting married before I starting falling in love with Addhya.

The idea of Addhya not being in my life is unimaginable. Without Addhya, I would have been less happy just like before I met her. I turned over, facing Addhya. "I don't think that's possible. Even if it is, I don't want to live in that world."

Addhya is more than a wife or a lover. We've been good friends first and still are. Without her (as a friend or a lover), I would have never made it here. There was a long pause before Addhya replied. "Me too."

I beleived in fate. The idea is comforting, that you even if you acted differently in the past it would have happen as well. That your future would have been the same despite what you've done in the past. The idea of not knowing Addhya was strange and impossible but now, it's something I wish was a reality.

□

I hate Amir. There's no other way to say it. Even if you sweeten your tongue and repeat the words, the meaning won't change and neither would the distaste. The hatred won't fade, no matter what you do.

If I had the choice of saving him or going in debt for seven years, I'll pick the latter. If Amir is the only one that can save me, I'll rather die than look at his face.

My clear distaste for him isn't even a few weeks or a year old. It's been two years since I last could see him as an ally. They were wrong, time doesn't heal open wounds.

It's strange seeing him after so many years. I've almost forgotten how simular Addhya's and his eyes were. Although the color couldn't replace hers, it's a close subistuite.

Just looking at him reminds me of the two siblings that would never stop fighting. Amir never had a close relationship with Addhya and it's too late to change it now.

Despite the fact I'm standing across the room, I can feel his eyes burning in my back. He wants me gone, somewhere far from his perfect picture. I wonder if Alia knows about his past.

My shirt clings to my skin, melting into my skin. The heat is getting too much in here and the crowd of people does nothing but to add to it.

I maneuver around the crowd, feeling trapped. There's too many people, too much noise. Even though loud music is blaring from the stereo, people's voices are heard above them.

It's frustrating. It's frustrating to see all the glasses people easily clink against each others, saying cheers when that same liquid has ruined so many lives. It's beyond frustrating, watching people laugh and talk as if the music isn't playing.

I need to get out of here. Tiring. That's the only word I could think of right now. This whole experience is draining, remembering my past. The same past I want to forget more than anything else.

But I can't. The memories bubble up again, repeating over and over in my head. Every time I see him, I remember Addhya. Every single time I look around, seeing unfamiliar faces reminding me of another time.

A time I don't want to remember. I don't want to remember her laugh, knowing that I'll never hear it again. Every single memory is so painful, knowing that I'm the only one who remembers.

I push the doors open, leaving the stuffy room to meet a cold gust of air. I welcome the change, gratefully accepting the cold breeze compared to a room with too many people.

I frown, realizing that my car is parked on the other side of the car park. This side is oddly unfamiliar. Everything is the same as you'd expect in a car park; shady trees keeping cars cool, a few cars there and here and a few pieces of trash. There's barely any cars parked on this side comparing it to the rush I was forced to park my car in.

The fading rays of sunlight hit my face and I hold up a hand over my face, trying to avoid getting blinded. I pull my tie away from my neck, trying to breathe. Why am I so panicked over nothing? The car park probably just reminds me of something I've forgotten.

That's when it hit me why the car park seems so strange to me, why it feels strange yet unfamiliar.

It's where I last saw her.

□

How was the chapter? Any guesses on the plot?

Feedback?

I was so sick today but I feel like my flu is disappearing. *dances around the room*

Vote?

- Maya