Shawnie's POV

I look at him and he doesn't look too excited. I'm in complete shock again. Wasn't he just saying that he would jump at the chance to get back with me?

"I'm sorry, what?" I say, looking for him to repeat.

He chuckles a little, then looks down at the ground. "Yeah. I said it...I'm engaged ...."

"Really?" I smile, "What's her name?"

"Her name is Shelby. She's from here and she's a nurse at the hospital. She's really sweet."

It's nice that he's engaged. I'm genuinely happy for him. Christian definitely deserves it because he's such a good man. He was a good man when we were younger, so I know he's going to make her happy.

"Okay. But how are you saying you want to jump at another chance with me? You're engaged?"

"Because that's how serious I am and how serious I've been about this." He says

"I've wanted the same thing but let's be realistic. It's a nice thought..."

"I love the thought of it. I wish we both were single, so we can just—."

"Be together again." I finish his sentence. "...we were close, best friends. I'm just happy to have you back in my life." I say. "Let's stick with that. I need good friends."

"Okay. And I'm not gonna let your little boyfriend run me out this time."

"Marcel told me you guys made up. Is that true?" I ask

"Hell naw! I still wanna fuck that man up." He says

"Wow. He lied about that too. That's crazy. I broke up with him and that was one of the reasons I took him back."

"You never called to find out either."

"I deleted your number." I confess

"Damn, Ma. Why?"

"I don't know." I lied.

"That hurt my feelings a bit. I thought you would reach out but you never did and I know why now. I thought you were happy. I thought maybe y'all had gotten your shit together."

"No, but we were good for a while, then it went downhill again." I say

"Again, I'm sorry."

"...it's not your fault. It's mine." I say

"Don't blame yourself for him being a coward and an asshole. You couldn't control that shit. Just be glad it's over, you've moved on and had a better life than he could ever have, or given you."

"You're right and I have, but sometimes it just bothers me." I admit

"I understand that but you can't let that ruin experiences in your life or experiences with people." He says

"He broke me."

"And someone helped put you back together." He says. "I can see that Chris really helped you. I don't know much but I know you, and I watched you change. That's all I'm going to say about it."

"Yeah, he's a good person, that Christopher." I smile

"I owe him. I feel like he did what I was supposed to do. He stepped up."

"You act like I'm your responsibility and I'm not. Especially when I haven't talked to you in years." I say

"Some shit just doesn't go away..."

"Don't I know it." We share a knowing look.

"What are the odds that we would run into each other?" He smiles, changing the subject.

"This shit is crazy." I laugh

"What do you think Drake is going to say?"

"Oh...Yeah. Aubrey..."

"Does he know about me?"

"Yes...and... I don't think he's going to like this at all. I mean, he might be cool with us getting back in touch with each other but... He's a little unpredictable sometimes." I say

"Really? I see him not even caring what you do."

"Yeah that's what you see, but that's not how he is. He could be jealous sometimes but that's only because he cares about me so much."

Christian just looks at me.

"What?"

"Sounds like Marcel." He says

"No... he's not like Marcel. Maybe with the jealousy thing but it's not what you're thinking. We went to therapy a few months ago and I ended up telling him everything that went on back then, so he knows about you. He knows about everything that went down with both relationships and I kind of feel like it was a mistake giving him so much information because he thinks I married him because you guys have some similarities."

"You did." He says like he knows

"Somewhat." I say, "But that wasn't the only reason."

"I was your first. It's hard to let your first go." He smirks

"True."

"So just say that." We both laugh. "Do you have any plans for tomorrow?"

"No." I smile.

"Dinner is on me. I'll text you the address."

"Okay." I smile.

"Aight... I gotta go, I have to be at the hospital at 5 am but...I'll text you when I get home."

"Some things never change. 5 am call times..." I say

"Some things may seem like they haven't changed but that's only because you haven't seen me in a while. I know to be patient with a lot of things and I know when to accept change and when to put my foot on the brakes when I need to. Making the effort...Remember that?"

"I do. I see you learned something from me."

"A life lesson." He smiles, then leans and kisses me on the forehead.

"Be safe getting home." I say

"I will...I gotta see you again." He smiles

"STOOOOP!" We both start laughing.

"Goodnight." He says then leaves out.

I sat outside for a few minutes before I heard Joe stepping outside.

"Hey! I was just about to come in. Christian just left." I say

"I know, I walked him out."

"It's so crazy being able to hold a conversation with him again after so long."

"This was the guy you were talking about before, right?"

"Yeah...that's crazy right?" I say excitedly.

"Yeah...crazy." He says monotone.

"What's wrong?" I look at him concerned. He doesn't seem happy, or anything.

"Can you really trust this guy? You haven't talked to him in years and I'm just saying, maybe he could be a security breach. You have him in here with you, where you sleep, where your kids are going to be sleeping. I'm just a little protective of this situation." He explains and I sense a little jealousy.

"Christian is fine. He's harmless." I say

"You have the right to feel that way. He's an old friend of yours. But as your security, I also have a right to feel this way. It's my job to protect you, and you trust me with this job. I take it seriously and I'm going to keep my guard up with this." He says

I smile at Joe, "I love how serious you are. I trust whatever feelings you have towards this and I'll respect it, but Christian is harmless." I say seriously. I don't want him to think Christian is a bad guy or anything.

"And we'll see about that." He says.

"I'm gonna go take a shot of something and then I'm gonna go to bed."

"Do you need anything?" He asks

I laugh, "What I need you can't give me."

Joe laughs for a second then he stops. I don't think he found that comment too funny. Things felt a little awkward for some reason. To avoid the awkwardness, I get up and walk into the house. I clean up the kitchen and I go to bed. Joe was still sitting outside.

*************

The next morning, I opened my eyes and stared at the ceiling. The first thought that popped up in my head was Christian. I just still cannot believe that I saw him and that I talked to him after so many years. This shit was so crazy to me, I cannot believe I was living this dream. I've always wondered what it would've been like if Christian and I would've stayed together. I know we would've been happy. I know I would've had that life that I wanted but I was just so stupid and impatient when I was younger and I know it was my fault things turned out the way they did but I've learned to live with my decisions.

I sit up in bed and grab my phone off of the nightstand. He said he's been trying to send me messages on my social media. Let's see if he was lying. I don't know his Instagram or anything but let's just give this a shot.

I go to my messages, and type Christian in the search bar. A lot of people popped up, and none of them were him. I type Middlebrooks and his handle pops up along with his thread, Dr_Middlebrooks14.

I click on the thread and I see he was right. There were messages dating back to three years after we had last spoken. There were at least 30 messages from him over the years. I never knew he was trying to reach out to me. I smiled as I read the messages. A bunch of heys, a lot of miss yous, even a couple of heart emojis. He was also sending little updates on himself. He definitely told me he moved to San Diego. He even told me when he got hired at the hospital he currently works at now. He sent a message about Aubrey back when he and I first started dating. I thought it was cute. He tried to keep in touch with me. I wish I would've known. I feel like all of this shit would've gone so much more differently.

I decided to shake those thoughts out of my head and click on his profile. There was a picture my eyes instantly went to. It was a photo that I had posted about six months ago but he posted it two months ago.

Instagram

Dr_Middlebrooks14

Dr_Middlebrooks14 😮‍💨 SHEESH!!!! I have the biggest crush on this woman. 🤤

Then I looked down a few rows and I saw another picture of me. It was kinda crazy for me to see this.

Dr_Middlebrooks14

Dr_Middlebrooks14 😍😍

I scroll back up to the top. The last picture he posted was a couple of weeks ago. It was a picture of him with a woman I'm assuming is Shelby because the caption read, "Future Mrs. Middlebrooks". I stared at the photo for a few minutes. Him calling someone else future Mrs. Middlebrooks kind of sent a wave of something through me. I was definitely jealous and it was strong, but that way was something else. I just used to feel like we were going to get married and seeing this kind of hurt a little bit. Maybe a lot. Brought up old feeling.

I guess she was cute. I couldn't really see her face but whatever. I guess this was his fiancé.

After scrolling through his pictures and following him, I closed Instagram.

I heard Christian's words in my head. I need to call my father. It was definitely something I was dreading because I haven't spoken to him in at least eight months. I know it's something that I need to do because he's my father and tell him that Christian said if anything was to happen to him I would lose my mind.

I take a deep breath and I call my dad.

"Well, well, well...Hello my estranged daughter!" He says sarcastically.

"Hey Dad! I'm sorry I haven't called. I don't have a reason other than I didn't want to make things more uncomfortable for myself. I know you and Aubrey don't get along and I didn't wanna make you upset because I was still with him."

"Baby girl, I don't care that you're with him. You married the man and after the conversation he and I had, I realized he's not that bad. He's just not what I'm used to. He protects you, he loves you and he adores you. I saw that when we talked and I saw that at Gen's birthday party. He'd do anything for you. I made a decision that I was going to give him a chance. And I tried that...but our conversations became nonexistent."

"I know and I'm sorry for that. I just have so much going on and at the time I was really focused on my marriage. I just felt that my relationship with him was priority and I needed to make sure that was good before any other relationship in my life and I was wrong. I should've done better with balancing my relationship, especially with you."

"Well to be honest, you really dropped the ball because you used to be very good with balancing things and making sure everyone has a place, or time with you."

I laugh, "Scheduling was my thing."

"I'm not mad at you baby girl, I understand you have a family and a life to live. I know things aren't easy but you have a family who loves you and only wants the best for you. I love that you have Mercedes out there with you because ain't shit out here for her. She's been keeping me updated with you. I know you're okay."

"Mostly."

"She doesn't get into details. I know you're alive." He laughs, "She doesn't tell me anything juicy. I don't see or hear much about you on tmz anymore, so I know things are fine."

"Yeah, something like that."

"I wish I could see the kids. I haven't met my grandson yet." He says and I feel horrible.

"I know. We haven't posted him yet. We've been trying to keep that private, but you have to meet him. I think it's long overdue. When is a good time for you to come out to California?" I ask

"I'm open."

"Okay, one week from today. I'll get you out here. Oh, by the way, I'm living in San Diego right now."

"San Diego?" There was a few seconds of silence, then he spoke again. "San Diego is beautiful."

"So, I'll get you the details and let you know."

"Sounds like a plan."

"And you can stay as long as you want. I know you probably want to see Chris too, so I'll make sure that happens."

"I only want to see you and the kids. Is Drake there as well?" He asks

"..... I'm taking a break. The boys have the kids, it's just me and my security here."

"Oh...okay...I won't pry." He says

"I'll explain when you get here. I'll pick you up from the airport too."

"Wow! Really? I always have a car service."

"Yeah, but I want to."

"Cool. Things seem a little different. I can't wait to see you."

"Me either." I say, "But I have to start my day. I'll get the details to you."

"Okay. Have a good day, baby girl. I love you."

"I love you too, daddy." I say then end the call.

That went well. I knew it would, I was just nervous so much time had passed. I can't wait to see my dad.

I check my text messages and I have one from Aubrey, one from Mercedes and one from Christian. Of course I went to Christian's first.

Christian: Good Morning! I hope you have a good day and I can't wait to see you at dinner tonight.

I smile at my phone, reading the text again. I'm still in shock.

Me: Good morning. I can't wait to see you too. I'm so happy to have you back in my life. 😊 But do me a favor, set your social media to private and don't approve anyone.

I know I'm being paranoid but I don't want Christian to go through what I went through. I don't want to throw him into anything. I have to explain to him why I need him to do this. Him being photographed with me will bring shit on Aubrey and I refuse to make this a media thing.

I know nothing can happen between us. I'm married and he's engaged. We're just friends catching up, but paps sell their pictures and the rumors start to fly. I want to keep my private life private.

I touch Aubrey text and it's just the regular, generic shit he always sends.

Aubrey: I love you, Mami. I'll come back down in a few days.

I kinda rolled my eyes at his text. I'm so tired of him. I don't even bother to respond, I just go to the next text.

Mercedes: Call me as soon as you can. I got some good gossip.

I laugh to myself. Shit, I do too. I have to get her and Dori down here. I think that would do some good for me mentally.

I put my phone back on the nightstand and went into the bathroom to shower, get dressed and start my day.

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