Near midnight, I was still wide awake. I'd tossed and turned for hours, tried every possible position I could stretch or contort myself into. Tried every method for falling asleep that I knew. It still wouldn't come. Frustrated, I kicked off the blankets and padded out into the hall. Mikael had left hours before, and now the house was silent. I tried my best to keep it that way as I crept out into the kitchen to fill a glass of water.

Standing over the sink, a shadow that flitted across the living room floor made me jump and nearly drop the glass. When I checked, there was no one there; it had come from movement outside. Gabriel was still here, standing just below the porch, lit by a bright moon overhead.

Through the window I saw him pull a small vial from his pocket. With shaking hands, he raised it to his lips and tipped it up. It was empty, but he seemed determined to get every last drop. He threw it to the ground in frustration and it shattered against the porch steps.

"Gabriel?" I stepped outside and closed the door softly behind me. "What is that?"

"Go back inside. It's late." He sagged against the railing. His teeth ground together so loudly that I could hear the grating sound from where I stood several feet away and it tore straight through me.

"What are you taking?" In spite of myself, I was concerned about him.

"Nothing."

I took a step closer, truly examining him for the first time since getting back. Gabriel's hair was unkempt and his shoulders were rounded, his entire body under tension. He wore two expressions: on the surface, his face was drawn and stoic. Underneath, though, I could see the pain. His eyes were fixed on a point somewhere to my left, beyond the house, but they were unfocused. By the way he blinked them hard every now and then I could tell his vision was blurred.

"Tell me." I stepped forward. He stepped back, wavering, nearly stumbling.

"Don't," he warned when I held out a hand.

"It's for your head?" I guessed. He nodded tightly. "How bad is it?"

"Please go back inside," he pleaded. "It's late, and cold. You should be asleep."

Our roles should have been reversed. It should be him trying to reach out to me. It should be me pushing him away. I knew that; I wanted that. But maybe, just for tonight, I could set that aside. I could go back to hating him tomorrow.

"Only if you'll come with me." I could swear he stopped breathing. I moved closer and slipped my hand into his. The feeling of his fingers tightening instinctively around mine made my chest ache with longing. "Come with me, Gabriel."

He let me pull him into the house, down the hall, into my room. I sat him on the edge of the bed and took off his shoes, then his damp jeans. I gestured for him to raise his arms and pulled his shirt off over his head. His smell. Fuck, his smell. I'd missed it so badly I could cry.

I laid him down and tucked him under the blankets. I slid into the bed beside him and he let me maneuver him to lay his head on my chest. Wordlessly, he clung to me. I ran my fingers through his knotted hair in long, calming strokes. He needed this. We both did.

I could go back to hating him tomorrow.

Gabriel was still hard asleep when I woke up, splayed out sideways on the bed with one arm and one leg draped protectively over me. He was a furnace—despite the chill of the room, I was sweating in my thin pajamas. Hair a tangled mess, mouth slightly open as he breathed slowly, it looked like this was the first good night of sleep he'd gotten since I'd left. I know it was mine.

Carefully, I wiggled out from under him, pausing every couple seconds to make sure he hadn't woken up. I wasn't ready to talk to him yet, nor was I prepared to admit that spending the night with him had eased all of the aches and cramps that had been building in my body. My stomach felt fine, and when I stood, my head didn't spin. It was a relief and a curse.

After I dressed, I found Constance and Dmitri in his office. With a warm smile, Constance left to brew me a mug of tea. Dmitri was at his desk, just as distraught as the night before. For as good as my sleep had been, his was probably much worse.

I sat in the chair across from him and moved it forward so my knees touched the front of the desk. It was covered with papers and letters. Notebooks with scribbles and crossed out paragraphs. Maps.

"He timed it all so perfectly." Dmitri finally broke the silence. "The human incursions were the perfect smokescreen. The Alpha gathering, the silver blades...it was all a distraction. He timed it so perfectly," he repeated.

"All the war books in his library should have been a giveaway," I joked flatly.

He hummed. "He'd have had us attacking the humans sooner than later, I'm sure. We would have been weak then. Weak enough for the rogues to overpower us."

"But why?"

"To run us out, I'd assume." Dmitri shrugged. "To take our land, maybe absorb our packs if he removed the Alphas. It's not a bad plan, I'll give him that."

Constance came back in and handed me a hot mug. "He's clearly been waiting on the right time to do this for a while," she commented before circling the desk to lean against Dmitri's chair. He tipped his head to rest it on her arm. A pang of jealousy shot through me. Being together came so naturally to them.

As if on cue, Gabriel entered the office quietly and moved to stand behind my chair. As tempted as I was to lean back against him, to feel his body against the back of my head, I resisted the urge. Instead, I shifted to sit forward and put my elbows on the desk. Dmitri and Constance both nodded to him.

"So," I started. I wanted to make a point of ignoring him. I gave in last night. Today, he could work for it. "What happens now?"

"Now, I figure out who I can trust." Dmitri sighed heavily. "We'll need to get a plan together quickly if we want to remove Erick. Are you sure the humans won't say anything?"

His eyes were fixed on mine intently and I nodded. "I'm positive. I promised that I could guarantee their protection if they stopped making the blades. I hope you'll honor that."

Dmitri dipped his head solemnly. "Of course. You have my word."

"And mine." Gabriel's voice behind me was soft. Sincere. He meant it. Without thinking, I raised one of my hands and found his where it was gripping the back of my chair. I let my fingers graze over his knuckles just briefly before dropping it back into my lap. The smile that flickered across Constance's face when she saw the gesture made me blush. Instead of leaning forward again, I stayed put between his hands.

"I'll reach out to Barrett first," Dmitri said, then looked at Gabriel for confirmation. "And maybe Isaiah?"

"I think that's fine to start," Gabriel agreed. "He won't go without a fight, so the quicker we can move on this, the better."

"Would it not be better to go in with a small group and catch him off-guard? Rather than launch any sort of full-scale attack?" Constance suggested. The pride in Dmitri's eyes when he looked up at her to agree was unmistakable.

"We'll want reinforcement positioned close either way," Gabriel said. His voice, calm and assured, washed over me. I always liked seeing him in Alpha mode, the confident leader—at least, when he was being reasonable.

Dmitri hummed. "You'll speak with your soldiers? I'd imagine Barrett and Isaiah can be here with theirs by morning. Small teams, maybe three or four men apiece."

"I'll leave shortly." A rustle behind me as Gabriel shifted. "Kiera, I'd like to speak with you before I go."

I stiffened, then paled when Constance and Dmitri both stood and left to allow us the privacy of his office. My mind was spiraling, imagining each possibility of what Gabriel might say. That he was leaving, and I wasn't welcome to return with him? That he'd be going with the teams to confront Erick?

"Kiera." Gabriel said my name again softly. He'd moved around the chair and knelt beside it so that he could meet my lowered gaze. "Come home with me."

My heart skipped a beat, or maybe several. Of all the things I thought he might say, that wasn't one of them. I searched his pale eyes for several moments. I wasn't entirely sure what I was looking for, but what I found there bordered on desperation.

He drew in a breath, took my hands in his, then continued: "There's a lot I need to tell you, but I don't want to do it here."

I pulled my hands from his. "You're going to tell me here or I'm not going anywhere. If I go back with you, there's nothing stopping you from freezing me out again."

If I had to use myself as a bargaining chip to get him to talk, so be it.

He reached for my hands again, gripping them tightly this time before I could pull away. His were trembling so slightly that if I hadn't been so acutely in tune with him, I wouldn't have noticed the movement at all. "I miss you."

I shook my head; that wasn't enough. "And?"

"I'm sorry." His apology was low and raw.

"And?" He needed to work for this. After enduring his silence that night, I needed him to show me that he meant his words.

"And I don't want to go back to that house without you. And I want to show you what I've been working on, and I want to tell you everything." Gabriel leaned forward and pressed his forehead against mine, eyes falling closed, mentally trying to force his thoughts into my head. Without the link between us, this was the best he could do. "But I need you to know that I've released you from the life-debt. Anywhere you go now is your choice."

It didn't matter that I couldn't hear him through a link, I could feel his every emotion swirling around me. Around us. I closed my own eyes, too, and leaned into him.

"Okay," I whispered.

He let go of one of my hands to rub his thumb across my cheek. "You're too good to me."

"I know." Our lips were so close together, less than a hair's breadth between them. He wouldn't be the one to close the gap, I knew. He'd leave it up to me to decide whether I wanted to or not. I did. I kissed him gently, softly, just for a second.

"I don't deserve it." Gabriel's lips moved against mine.

I kissed him once more. "I know."