[Narcissus]:  (is believed to be)  the flower that distracted Persephone

when she was abducted by Hades

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It's not until Syd leaves and I get into bed that million and one questions about Connor start to attack my brain.

He should really pay rent for occupying all this space in my head.

Because of him the ceiling of my room suddenly becomes VERY inviting, so I just keep staring at it for hours, while going through the full drawers of my brain.

Okay, so what IF Connor really beat that guy up? There has to be a reason for it.

I don't think he has turned into a total psycho that beats up whoever he wants to, just because he feels like going out and kicking some ass.

And I need to find that out somehow.

I need to know how true the rumors about him are, so I can let it all go. So I can let HIM go...

I want to know the answer to every question I have about him, so I can be totally done with him. Or let my mind drift to him without regrets.

Violence is a complete no-no to me. And if he's indeed so ruthless to beat someone up so much that he can't even walk to school, then he should have absolutely no place in my head and heart. None.

The next day during all of our classes together, my eyes are at the end of every classroom. I keep looking for him everywhere, but he's nowhere to be seen.

Why didn't he come to school? Isn't he worried to not finish even the first semester of college?

Doesn't he care?

Although, he always hated school, but weirdly knew all the stuff in the textbooks and had the highest grades. I wonder if he's still like that.

My eyes keep lingering on his desk desperately during our last class too, as I wish he were here, so I could just go up to him after the class and ask him my questions.

But who in the world am I even kidding? He'd never answer to any of it.

However, there's still another way for the Sherlock Me.

Throwing a last glance at Connor's empty seat and finally getting the hint that he won't magically appear, no matter how long I stare at it, I turn around in my seat and gently poke Syd's shoulder during Modern Lit.

"Which one's the guy Con_ Trouble allegedly beat up? Is he present?" I ask as soon as she turns her head slightly to the right so that she can hear me.

She growls silently and nods.

"The one wearing a green t-shirt. Three seats behind you. And by the way, can you stop tapping your ridiculous shoes on the floor? It feels like you're having a fancy mental breakdown."

I look down at my cute baby blue slingback shoes, with a little pointed toe and block heels, only to notice one of my feet abuse the floor. I stop and stare at my favorite pair of shoes, which have small light golden flowers sewed on them and a ribbon around my ankles.

The thing is I'm crazy about shoes. More so when they are my favorite color - baby blue or white. Every shoe store I enter is like a candy shop for a kid, who's been allowed to have her first chocolate bar. So yeah, no regrets in that area.

"My shoes aren't ridiculous. In fact, I believe the word you're looking for is fabulous."

Because they are. I've had girls I don't even know, compliment them all day. It's just because Syd is a sneaker kind of chick.

"Right," she mutters under her breath as she turns her head away. She sits up straight, looking ahead and concentrating on the discussion. A thing I'm not able to do for the life of me.

I drop my pencil purposely and when I bend down to pick it up, my eyes find him immediately.

Blonde hair, a little crooked nose, brown eyes. Now that I pay attention, there is indeed a light blue yellow-ish circle under his left eye.

So Connor might have really done some job on his face.

Once we're dismissed, and I'm finally set free from my self-torture,  I follow Isaac out, but not before making a show of being in a hurry in front of Syd.

I tell her my father needs to Skype with me in half an hour, which is a total lie because my father... he never calls me now. I could drop dead and he'd not even notice.

I don't blame him at all.

As I follow Isaac closely, I realize I don't have a plan. I have no clue what I'm going to say to him, so I decide to go along with the flow.

The hallways are full of students now which makes it harder to shove my way through the bodies and tail him.

When I finally reach him I trip on my feet intentionally and bump into his back. My books drop on the ground as I fake surprise.

He nearly falls on his face with a force but manages to hold himself up and stand straight.

"What the hell?" He almost shouts.

"Oh my God, I'm so sorry," I say in a rush, faking all the innocence in the world, as I try to gather my books. I look up and apologize again, and see him watching me with recognition.

Guess he's recognized me from our class together.

I don't expect and need him to help me out, because I'm just trying to approach him as naturally as possible, but he does. He bends down and hands me some of my notes and books before both of us stand up.

Phew, the first part of my plan has gone down better than expected. Now it's time for the second, most important one.

"I didn't do that to your face, did I?" I ask him pointing at his eye, fake surprised. He laughs, shaking his head no.

Yes!

"No, no. This one has been here for days. It's Mia, right? I'm Isaac, we have Modern Lit together." He says and BAM! He's actually the one to keep the conversation going, which I really need right now.

"Oh...Nice to meet you, Isaac." I hold my free hand up for a handshake, and he takes it without a question, except I feel him shake it way too eagerly. 

When I get rid of his suspiciously strong hold, I feel like I can ask more questions without sounding like a moron. Although the way he's looking at me is quite... unsettling.

"What happened to your face though? It must have hurt." I ask innocently, and for a second he pauses, staring at me suspiciously. That lasts only for a second before he gives me a huge smile and shrugs.

"You know, guy stuff."

"Oh, right! Not to be nosy I think I've heard something about it. There are so many rumors these days." I roll my eyes as if I don't care about any of it.

"Yeah? What have you heard?"

"Something about you getting into a fight with... Trouble, I think was his name. I don't know much, that's what I heard, so don't mind me."

Just like that, his eyes darken on me, and bloody hell, he looks scary. Not like Connor scary-slash-intense, more like "I can actually kill you" kind of scary.

"Yeah? Well, we did have a fight."

So it WAS Connor after all. But why? That's the most important question.

"I bet it's about video games," I try to fake-guess and press the matter as gently as possible.

However, this time he doesn't answer. He shoots back his own question, which makes me hold my breath for a second.

"Do you know him by any chance?" He asks out of nowhere, and oh my God, I'm a champ for not letting my panic show.

"Um, no? I've seen him around though." I shrug, and hopefully, he buys it without questioning the loud beating of my heart.

"That's weird because he seems to know you." He tells me as he watches me curiously under the radar.

Okay, now that's a quick turn of events.

For a second I'm on the verge of bursting out in denial and ask more about what Connor said. However, I'm fast enough to stop my big cartoon eyes from jumping out of their sockets. Because I realize, if I react right now, I'm doomed.

You know my superpower? Even though I know I'm naive when it comes to most things, I'm quite skillful in assessing people's eyes and seeing through their emotions. Another thing, I've got from Mom, because my Father could never.

And right now as I look into those sly eyes of his, I'm pretty much certain that this Isaac guy is testing me as much as I'm testing him.

He's checking my connections with Connor, but what surprises me the most, is how in the world he even knows there might be something between us.

And why does he need to have confirmation?

Faking confusion all over my face I shrug again. I pretend his question doesn't bother me at all, not the slightest bit.

"Hmm... I wonder how? I don't think he does." He watches my reaction carefully, as I try to act like an Oscar nominee winner. Please God, let me win the grand statue for this performance.

"Yeah, that's what I thought..." he trails off, before forcing another smile, obviously still deep in his thoughts.

Woah, is it just me or is the sound of his brain working actually loud enough for anyone to hear?

Just let it go, Isaac, I tell him mentally, trying to use my nonexistent hypnosis skills on him. What can I say? I like to try things.

"Anyway," he mumbles cheerfully, clapping his hands together. "I'm throwing a frat party this Friday, and you're welcome to join. Maybe we can even clear out the misunderstanding." He adds, taking a couple of steps back.

DON'T GO! I scream at him mentally, because I still have the most important question unanswered. Why? Why did Connor beat you up?!

But as soon as I open my mouth to ask him that again, he calls out a "See you on Friday," turns around, and disappears into the crowd.

I stand there not less confused than I was yesterday, realizing my plan didn't fully work.

Instead, I got invited to a party for whatever hidden reason I can't figure out.

But it's decided. If I want to know more about Connor and this fight, I'm going to be there. With Jack and Syd next to me, I'm pretty sure Isaac won't be able to dig whatever information he's planning to get from me.

Besides, I'm a tough and crazy nut to crack, so if he wants to test me again, he has to work harder than that.

I make my way out to the parking lot and walk straight to my car, feeling all confident with myself. I know I will find out about that fight sooner or later, and then I will make my decision based on it- to leave Connor in the past, or to...

To what, Mia? Or what?

What's the synonym for leaving? Is it staying? Loving? Believing?

For now, I am too of a chicken to answer that question even in my own headspace.

I am making my way to my car when I spot Connor sliding inside his black Audi SUV.

Oh, wow! Now, this is unexpected.

So he did come to school today, he just didn't feel like attending his classes.

Won't you look at this rebel?

Is this really his way of going against the world? Is this the big dark secret that makes everyone call him Trouble?

The thought only makes me want to laugh. Come on, Connor! I thought you were mature than that.

Not losing a second I start to run to his car, my favorite shoes making it easy for me to move fast.

And just when he is about to start the engine, I open the passenger's door and slide in.

"The fuck?" I hear him growl furiously before I turn my whole body to face him.

He's wearing all black again- t-shirt, a designer leather jacket with a couple of zippers, Nikes, and a baseball cap over his head.

I feel like he's trying to stay as unnoticed as possible today, but I bet I could notice his energy from miles away.

When my eyes travel back to his face, I freeze for a second, my breath catching in my throat as if I'm seeing him for the first time all over again.

His eyes are wide with surprise and frustration, but even now he's the most gorgeous human being I've ever seen.

He's like a dangerous, dark, and tricky God, you know you never want to cross paths with, but can't resist having a look at him.

I want to wrap my arms around him and hug his whole existence against my chest. Make him want to steal me away from everything and everyone in this world like Hades did to Persephone.

"What the hell are you doing?"

His green eyes make me pause for a second, because I swear, they can make me lose all of my self-control and determination, but I snap out of it sooner than I'd like to admit.

I don't answer him, shooting straight for his nerves.

"Do you think this is cool, Connor? Not showing up to classes, acting all high and mighty? I thought you were better than that."

"Get the fuck out of my car," he snaps, his eyes burning with fire.

Oh, look at that! He is indeed capable of showing his emotions.

I keep going without even paying attention to him and his high-class diva act.

"No, really. Do you think just because you don't attend your classes you are a real cool badass? It was cool like 50 years ago, now it just makes you a freaking dumbass, especially when we're not in middle school."

He turns his whole body to me, his knuckles clenching the steering wheel and eyes full of a storm.

For a second, the way he looks at me makes me almost piss my pants.

All right, he's a little scary when he's angry, but I know he won't ever hurt me. Not physically, at least. And I don't care what anyone else says, he's not abusive.

"I swear, Mia, it's taking everything that I have not to throw you out of the window, so for your own good, get the fuck out of my sight."

"Answer my next question and I will," I tell him stubbornly and before he can say anything else or threaten me again, I shoot. "Why did you beat him up... Isaac?"

His whole energy changes from furious to violent and it's obvious how much he hates both my question and the dude himself.

"Don't you ever say his name in front of me again?" He spits out, and I wonder what's going on in that pretty head of his.

"I need to know why Connor. I want to believe that you didn't do it just because you could. I want to believe you."

"I never asked you to believe me!" He throws his hands in the air in rage. "I give no shits if you don't. Get this through your head, I don't care about you."

I try to swallow the hurt his words cause, but the fact that he's not looking at me when he says it is speaking volumes.

Grabbing onto that thin thread of hope, I don't let his words sink in. I swallow before asking him another question, hoping to get another reaction out of him.

"He thinks there's something going on between us. He thinks you know me, and I have no idea why. Do you know anything about it?" My question makes him raise a questioning brow for a second, before leaning back in his seat relaxed.

When he speaks, his voice is insanely cold.

"All I know is that you will stay away from the motherfucker. At all times. Don't even breathe the same air with him." He commands with a final tone as if just him telling me this is enough for me to comply.

"Why? Who the hell are you to say that?"

"I won't repeat twice."

"You're no one to push me around without explanations. You don't have that right."

In a millisecond his hand reaches for my chin, as he takes it between his thumb and pointer finger, and jerks my face closer to him.

Now our noses are almost touching, our breaths mingling together and our eyes staring right into each other. He's still leaning back in the driver's seat, with half of my upper body over the gear shift, and from the outside, it might seem like I'm kissing him.

The thought alone is enough for my body temperature to rise to infinity.

For a second I feel his eyes travel down and rest on my lips, and when his eyes darken I think he might actually kiss me right now.

And I'd let him. Because nothing has changed.

My heart is off the charts as I sit there frozen, mesmerized by his eyes and scent and our closeness.

I tell myself to calm the hell down but doing so seems impossible.

"Such a fucking hypocrite..." he mumbles still staring at my mouth before his eyes travel back up to mine.

I'm tongue-tied, feeling his minty breath kiss my lips as he speaks, and I have no idea how I manage to call him out on his bullshit and not sound like a raccoon.

"You know what they say, the pot calling the kettle black and all that..." I trail off, as I try not to drop dead right here.

"Still as fearless as ever, I see..." He muses under his breath before his gaze turns more threatening and dark. "Now, get the fuck out."

I don't know how, but I manage to catch my breath and look back into his eyes with newfound stubbornness, determination, and no sense of fear.

Because no, like the naive girl that I'm, I'm not afraid of him, I don't think I'll ever be. But I can feel that it's going to come back and bite me in the ass.

Yeah, I'm definitely going to regret this.

"No," I say the word firmly, staring right into his eyes and a small mocking smile on my lips.

A ghost of a smirk crosses his face as his hand reaches for the gear shift and pulls on it, his eyes still boring into mine.

"Well, this is going to be fun."