Once I finally pulled myself together enough to get up off the floor, I watched through the bedroom window as Hoseok and his friends left the house with all of their bags and luggage with them. I have no idea how they explained it to our parents, because once they left, so did I. I was on Winter Break from school, and I just had to get out of there for a while. So I took my dog, went back to my apartment, packed some things, got in my car, and drove.

I was walking Rizzo, at a rest stop in Oklahoma, when I remembered a little tidbit that Jungkook had said on the intercom. Something about knowing Hoseok's name and having Google. I knew that I probably shouldn't have, but I looked him up.

Holy. Shit.

Apparently, Jung Hoseok, my Jung Hoseok, was an international K-Pop idol. His stage name was J-Hope.

I was not prepared for that.

He was in a group called BTS. I had never heard of them before. I was more into bands like All-American Rejects or Panic! At the Disco. Definitely not my scene. No wonder I had no idea who he was.

But he could have told me.

Against my better judgment, I downloaded some of their music. I had Youtube Music Premium for a reason. I might as well use it. I was kind of glad for my crash course in Korean, because, without it, I would never have been able to understand most of the lyrics. By the time that I got to New Mexico, I was bawling. I had to pull over and try to get myself under control before I could drive any farther.

Listening to their music was weird. I knew each of their voices, and I could easily pick them out. Jimin, of course, sounded like an angel. I already knew that one. RM and Yoongi were rappers. Jin's voice was higher than I expected, and Taehyung's was a lot lower. I was surprised by Jungkook's voice. It was so pretty and clear. I liked it.

But it was Hoseok's that really got to me. He could sing and rap. Most of the time, he did this combination between rapping and singing. It was weird, but beautiful, and it worked.

Listening to them was a really bad idea. One certain song really got to me and had me breaking down. According to the playlist I downloaded, it was called Answer: Love Myself.

It was like this song was written for me and my insecurities. Hoseok's part really spoke to me. Which had me crying even harder. I didn't handle Zero O'Clock very well, either. I really needed to turn them off and turn on some angry rock or something. The Truth by Good Charlotte or Liar by Taking Back Sunday both seemed like valid options right now. And yet...I couldn't seem to bring myself to turn off BTS. I was absolutely, 100%, head-over-heels in love with Jung Hoseok, and as much as it hurt, I wanted to keep a little piece of him with me right now.

When Rizzo and I got to Arizona, I stopped at a Visitor's Center (yes, people really go to those.) to walk him and see what exciting things there were to do in this state. I've never been here before. Phoenix was a good option. So was Flagstaff. But one place kept calling my name. So I got back in my car, got a full tank of gas and a root beer for the road, and headed to Page, Arizona and Lake Powell.

By the time that I pulled into Page, I had been on the road for over two days. I had stopped to sleep, but I really only got about 3 hours. I'm surprised I had gotten that. I couldn't turn off my brain. I wasn't kidding when I told him about my insomnia. Three hours was pretty much a normal night for me. I was basically living on Dr. Pepper, Frappuccinos, and Beef Jerky at this point, and I didn't even care. Rizzo and I both needed out of this car.

I drove over to Flagstaff, then up to Page. Well...It felt like down, since Flagstaff was at a much higher elevation. Coming in on Highway 85, I didn't get a real glimpse of the lake until I had already gotten through town and went over the bridge near the Glen Canyon Dam. Over the dam was the deep blue water of Lake Powell. It was beautiful. I drove along the road and followed the signs for the resort at Wahweap. Weird name, but it looked pretty when I booked it from the visitor's center. I was just glad that they allowed dogs.

When I got to the resort and checked in, I found my room, got Rizzo some food and water, and then opened the door to the balcony. It faced the lake, and I could really get used to this view. I had always loved water. It made me happy. I had a friend who is really into astrology, and she says that it's only natural, because, being a Scorpio, I'm a water sign. I don't know. But I do always feel more relaxed and like myself when I'm around water, and that's exactly what I needed right now.

I sat down in the chair on the balcony and unlocked my phone, then I turned off the do not disturb. Instantly, my phone started going crazy. There were around 10 texts and 4 voicemails from my dad, but I had called him from New Mexico, so he knew that I was alright.. I deleted those. Then came the one's from the other guys in BTS. Jungkook sent a bunch, but I had several from the other guys, too. All of them were apologizing like crazy, and trying to explain themselves. There really was no excuse for what they all put me through, just for a fucking bet. None at all. As I was going through and deleting them, one from Yoongi caught my eye, because it was so long. I paused and read it.

YoongiCat: Ellie, I want to start out by saying that I'm sorry. When we all found out about the marriage setup, we thought it would be funny to bet Hoseok that he could get the girl to fall in love with him before he dipped out. We didn't stop to consider the girl's feelings, and that was wrong and immature of us. But once we got to know you, once I got to know you, things changed. Especially with Hoseok. When he left South Korea to come to the states, he had no idea what was going on. Once his parents told him, he videocalled us. He was so dead-set on ending this as soon as possible, and that's kind of how the bet came about. But after the first time that he met you, he was singing a different tune. He told us that you fell down the stairs and he fell for you right then and there. That never changed. He only fell more in love with you the more time that the two of you spent together. None of this is his fault. Well...maybe the part where he didn't tell you. But mostly, the fault should be on the rest of us, not Hoseok. I really hope, that in time, you can find a way to forgive him. He is so broken right now. We moved to a hotel, but he absolutely refuses to leave the US. He says that it will be harder for you to find him if he does. I mean...that's not really true. If you heard everything we were saying, then I'm sure that you used Google to put two and two together and that by now, you've figured out who we are. While that might seem like another lie from him, just know this: We are surrounded by fans and sycophants all day long. He just wanted you to get to know him. Hoseok. Not J-Hope from BTS. After he met you, he decided not to tell you, not because he was hiding anything, but he said that he wanted you to fall for the person he is, not the person he shows to the rest of the world. And I think that you did that. This text is already more words than I normally say in 6 months, so I am going to end it with this: Please forgive him. I can't stand to see my best friend this broken. –Min Yoongi

I rolled my eyes at the way he signed it. Like the surname was really necessary. He knew that his number was saved in my contacts, he's the one that put it in there. But maybe he thought that I had deleted it. I don't know.

What he said made sense. It really did. But it still didn't help me feel any better. 

What was I supposed to do with this information? 

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Hello, friends! Please remember to comment and vote! 

Instead of our normal dose of sunshine that I add to the end of each chapter, I wanted to share some pictures of Lake Powell with you. It's so beautiful. It's like the Grand Canyon filled with water. Literally, it's like 125 miles up the Colorado right from the Grand Canyon. 

I didn't just pick this place at random. I was lucky enough to work there for awhile. It is one of the most beautiful places that I have ever seen, and it holds a special place in my heart. People from all over the world go to work at Lake Powell, and I made so many amazing friendships there. 

Currently, the water level at Lake Powell is at an all-time low, do to low rain and snow fall. It breaks my heart every time I see a picture of how it looks right now. The marina that I worked at isn't even accessible at the moment, because of dry spots in the lake. Glen Canyon Dam, which is what holds the water in Lake Powell, generates power for several states, and if the water levels don't rise, the think that it won't be able to generate any power within the next year.

Anyway...please enjoy the beauty that is Lake Powell.