LIFE SEEMED TO fall back into normal. I didn't go out of my way to avoid Orion, and he didn't mention our conversation either. Things went back to the normal rhythm. I went to classes. Studied. Hung out with Camille and Eileen. Everything seemed to be fine. And despite all the confusion and turmoil in my heart, I shoved it all apart, acting as if nothing was wrong at all, the way I had for the past decade or so.

It was at a cafe, one pretty afternoon in early November as the weather turned colder and the nights longer that I bumped into Jeremiah Park. He slid into the seat across from me, his ever charming grin present on his face.

"You by yourself, Salome?"

I raised one brow, regarding him. "Why yes. You?"

"Same. I'm bored. Thought I might sit here with you and sip my coffee rather than languish alone in the corner."

"It's a bit late for coffee."

"I'm an university student, Salome," he replied, rolling his eyes. "I drink coffee whenever. In fact, the best time for it is at midnight."

"You do you. You Koreans and lack of sleep go hand-in-hand according to internet memes."

"Well, it's kind of true. But it's just also a stereotype." He shrugged. "But I don't need that much sleep anyways. Danielle, she needs a lot of sleep to feel awake. I don't."

"Where is she anyways? And Mun-hee? Haven't seen them in a while."

"Busy, I guess? I'm not sure either. They'd both been staying in their dorms a lot more, which is why I'm here by myself rather than with them. It's quite sad, really."

"You sure you didn't accidentally piss them off?"

"I could never piss anyone off," he scoffed jokingly. "I'm Jeremiah Park. Everyone loves me."

I snickered over my cup of hot chocolate. "Narcissist."

He sent me a wink. "It's the truth."

And I suppose it was. Everyone seemed to adore Jeremiah, with his charming grin and nice manners and way of making everyone laugh. He was just one of those guys, I supposed, who managed to make everyone love him effortlessly. It was quite impressive. No one had a bad word to say about him.

It probably had something to do with his face too. He had lashes that even I was jealous of. It was ridiculous, how long they were.

"You doing anything this weekend?"

"Except lying on my bed and watching Netflix? No. It's getting too cold to head out. And I have a couple essays to write for class."

"That's unfortunate."

I raised one brow. He shrugged. "Was wondering if you wanted to do anything together this weekend."

I let out a loud snort. "No thank you. It'll be a miracle if anyone managed to drag me out of bed. I don't think even Camille can get me to go anywhere this weekend, honestly."

"Not going out this Friday, then?"

I shook my head. "Getting tired of it. I'm fine with heading out for a nice night every once in a while, but every week? I'm drained."

"Pity. Danielle, Mun-hee and I are going."

"Have fun, then."

"It'll be funner with you." He pouted. "But whatever. We'll make do."

I blinked, quikly hiding my surprise by taking a sip from my drink. "You going back to Korea this Christmas?"

"Definitely," he said. "I miss my mum's kimchi, you know? It just doesn't taste the same here, the one you get at the supermarket. And it's so much more expensive."

"I love kimchi," I admitted. "But the sweet kind. I can't handle anything too spicy."

"I'll keep that in mind, if I manage to bring any back. It seems unlikely as of present. How's your friends? Haven't seen Camille and Eileen in a while."

"Camille's busy trying to figure out a new apartment." She'd been discussing it non-stop with Livia these days. It seemed to be going decent. "Eileen's doing pretty well, I'm going out for dinner with her tonight."

"Have fun then, you two." Jere grinned, leaning back against his chair. "How's your essay for Christopherson?" Professor Christopherson taught us Global Diplomacy, which was also the one class I shared with Jere.

"I finished it yesterday night," I replied. I liked to be efficient, never much of a procrastinator. It bothered me, having unfinished work. Nothing was ever more satisfying than an empty to-do list, I'd always thought.

Camille tended to disagree, but she somehow always managed to miraculously finish all her work in time anyways. While I still needed to abide to regular sleeping schedules to stay awake, she was a nocturnal animal in every sense of the word. She seemed to always be able to run on the fewest hours of sleep as humanly possible, have no eyebags, and ace life anyways.

I'd know. We were roommates for one term a few years ago. It had been miraculous, watching her work.

"Jesus." Jere grimaced. "My document is still half empty. I have no idea what to do for it. No inspiration whatsoever."

"Just sit in front of it and refuse to let yourself do anything else until you get some words down. Once you get a few down, you won't be able to stop. The inspiration just starts coming in."

"Is that how you do it?"

"Duh," I said, rolling my eyes. "I wouldn't recommend it to you otherwise."

"I don't think it'll work for me," he mused, "but I'll give it a try anyways."

"Good luck. Christopherson marks pretty strictly all things considered."

"He teaches well though," Jere pointed out. "His class is my favourite, honestly." That, I agreed with. Professor Christopherson's class was one of my favourites too. He made it entertaining. It didn't feel like a class. It felt like I was watching a documentary. There was never any stress (until it came to homework, but that didn't stress me out too much).

"Well," I told him, "you have a few days left before the essay's due. Good luck with that, I think."

"I was planning on grabbing a drink here and heading to the library to continue working on it. Want to come with me?"

I shook my head. His offers were becoming a little bit too blatantly obvious now. And I truly, truly, was just not that much interested. It wasn't even just Orion—Jere just wasn't my type of boy. He was sweet, and I liked being round him. But he was not someone I could imagine being with in any kind of way past friendship, which was clearly what he was at least trying to aim for here.

"I'm heading home after this," I told him, motioning to the mug before me. "Just wanted a drink."

"Too bad." He sighed. "I'm so lonely, Salome. I'm so bored."

"Okay, call your parents."

"That is the worst idea you could have given me."

"Go find Danielle and Mun-hee."

He leaned forward now, chin perched on his hands, eyes widened as he stared at me. "Why are you so mean? Why won't you just be nice to me?"

"How am I being mean to you?" I laughed, shaking my head, landing both feet on the floor from my formerly cross-legged position. "I'm being very nice, aren't I?"

"No." He pulled a face. "I'm lonely, Salome."

"Too bad. Do something about it."

"Help me find something to do?"

"Jeremiah, I will kick you if you keep looking at me like that."

"Fine." He straightened, sighing. "You are cold-hearted, Salome Lam. A cold-hearted woman."

"Good for me," I snorted.

"Any plans for Christmas?" he asked, rolling his neck. "Going anywhere except back home?"

I shook my head. "Can't be bothered, honestly. Home's just the best place to be."

"You don't like going out?"

"Do I look like I like going out to you?" I adjusted my belt, turning my head to glance out the window. "No, I like staying curled up in my bed."

"I realised," he mused, "that you're actually kind of introverted. You really hit me as an extrovert at first."

"I don't mind socialising, but I also get tired of it pretty quick. Sometimes I just like being alone, you know? Camille's the extroverted one. We balance each other out."

"That's kind of sweet. She told me you guys have been friends for ages."

"Yeah. We became besties in primary school." I grinned. "We've stayed that way ever since."

"Orion's also your childhood friend, right? Orion Ip?"

I blinked, nonplussed by the sudden change in topic, but then nodded. "Yeah. We were neighbours and we studied at the same school both in Hong Kong and in the UK."

"He's very protective over you."

"He's like my older brother." That's what he considers himself anyways, even if he refuses to admit it.

Jeremiah hummed. "Yeah, I can tell. At the club and stuff."

"Ignore him," I sighed. "He means well, but he's also just a bit... yeah. A bit overprotective sometimes. My parents told him to watch over me here, and he's taking it a little bit too seriously. It's annoying, but he's starting to stop it now, so whatever."

"I have a feeling he's stopping because you have very politely asked him to."

"I had a few harsh words to say."

"Of course, of course. Seems like something you'd do."

I raised one brow. "What kind of person do you think I am, then? You seem to have many ideas."

"You want me to say?" he asked, pulling his hair back. "I'll only say nice things, though, nothing mean."

"I expected as much. But go ahead, I'm curious. And it might quench your loneliness, who knows?"

He grinned. "You're an interesting one, Salome."

"How flattering. Get on with it, Park."

He kicked his legs back, starting, "Well, you always seem to be very rational. You always give me the sense that you plan everything else beforehand, yeah? And like, from what I've noted, you never leave homework for the last few days. You finish it like, the moment they assign it to you, as quickly as you possibly can. You never drag it on. So I'm guessing you like schedules?"

"I do."

"And when we go to clubs and stuff, you never drink. Is it because you actually don't like drinking, or because you know Camille and everyone else is going to get absolutely wasted and someone needs to stay sober to watch over them?"

I tilted my head. "I think it's a bit of both. I genuinely don't like drinking, and I personally don't feel safe if I have any alcohol in my system in a place like that. And if Camille wants to get high and drunk, I might as well be the one who keeps her safe. I owe her that much."

"You're really responsible. And loyal to your friends. Single-mindedly loyal. You're a really devoted person. It's really rare to see someone stay this close to a single person for like, a decade, but you've managed with two people."

These were all things that I sort of already knew, deep in my heart. But it felt weird, hearing it come out of someone else's mouth.

"Also," he added, "you're very practical. You're an introvert, but you still socialise and put yourself into situations where you have to socialise, even though you don't like it. It's because you think it's necessary, don't you?"

"I do," I admitted. "If you don't socialise, what's the point of being so far away from home and paying such a high tuition and everything? I'm here to meet people. I don't need to be besties with them, but I at least need to know them well enough to be able to ask for a favour or two in the future, you know?"

"Is that what we are to you? Just people to ask favours from?"

"No," I told him, shaking my head. "I do enjoy having friends. And you guy's presence. But it is a big factor in why I put myself out there in the first place. People like Camille, she puts herself near people because she likes it. Because she revels in it. I don't."

"You and Camille really are polar opposites."

"It's why we've worked so well so far, I think."

"Hmm. But yeah, that's all I've gotten from you so far."

"What about yourself? How would you describe yourself?"

He blinked, as if he hadn't been expecting that question, crossing his legs and looking thoughtful. "I've never given it much thought, really. Analysing yourself is different from analysing others. You're always going to be far more biased when analysing yourself, because we all view ourselves from a specific lens of who we want ourselves to be, and our judgement will be skewed."

I studied him. This boy sitting before me, cross-legged, hair pushed back, his upwards-tilted eyes pensive. He had more layers than first met the eye, didn't he? I thought he'd been one of those party boys. Who cared for little except entertaining himself and always wanting to live in the moment. Surface-level boys, who were addicted to the crowds and flirting with pretty girls whose faces and names they would forget the moment they turned around.

He wasn't that, though. Jeremiah Park wasn't that.

I wasn't sure what to make of him now, that he'd shattered my expectations so thoroughly.

"What are you thinking about?"

I shook my head. "Just surprised, that's all. You don't strike me as this kind of person. You know. Who reads people so well."

"I was almost a psychology major," he said with a grin. "My mum was a psychologist too, so it's kind of in my blood."

"That makes sense. You're born with it."

"It used to freak some people out when I tell them I probably have a thousand word essay in my head analysing their personality and behaviour, but it is true."

"I think it's pretty cool," I told him. "I wish I could do that too, honestly. I'm decent at reading people, but some stuff always just escapes me and I unintentionally piss them off or something. And, well, sometimes I know what I say will piss them off and I just don't care."

"I know what you mean."

I didn't end up immediately going home. Instead I sat there in that cafe with my cup of cooling hot chocolate and chatted with Jeremiah for a whole hour. He was nice to talk to. Even when the conversation began to falter and I began to think of ways to exit the conversation and go, he somehow managed to flawlessly continue it on. And it didn't feel forced either.

It was nice, being around people like him sometimes. When I didn't need to overthink everything. He made me comfortable—he made everyone comfortable, if I thought about it. It was what made him him.

And it made me wonder if that flirtatious, outrageous boy was just a cover. If this Jeremiah, this Jeremiah that told me how he viewed my personality and explained how his own mind worked was the real Jere.

Or if this was just his way of making me feel more comfortable, feel more relaxed around him.

Or maybe I was just getting too suspicious and untrusting and expecting the worst of everyone for no reason whatsoever.

That was also very likely.

It was later than I'd expected when I finally made it back to my apartment. I threw myself onto the sofa and let my eyes flutter shut.

The conversation was nice, but it hadn't changed my mind regarding Jere's clear interest. I simply didn't return those sentiments. And he must be noticing by now, or he'd be an absolute idiot.

What he did with that knowledge was up to him. I didn't owe him anything. I hadn't led him on. Any time he'd tried to invite me out alone, I'd refused to offer. I'd been careful to maintain that line between friends and something else. I didn't flirt back, and if I did it was always jokingly and clearly so.

I didn't want a second Frances. I didn't want to break someone's heart because I thought I needed a distraction, I didn't want to use anyone else as a tool to move on. No one deserved that.

But I was really, really tired of liking Orion Ip.

I pulled myself up, rubbing my forehead. My mind didn't feel like it was on earth. My brain felt like it was floating. I'd been feeling like that ever since I'd left the cafe. It was a throbbing headache at the back of my head that prevented me from thinking straight. As if a layer of mist had descended upon my brain and was stopping me from staying fully awake.

I was tired. And I was puzzled. And confused. And I was unused to that.

I needed a shower. Desperately.