EIGHT

Even a mother's love couldn't save Eren.

"Auntie Carla," you say, "if it's not too much trouble, could you help me buy seeds for Mama's garden?"

"Eh? Sure, dear, but wouldn't you rather be out playing with Eren?"

Your heart hammered in your chest as you glanced outside the window, at the wall. In a few minutes, the fall of Shiganshina would commence. You looked back at Carla and gave her a natural smile.

"Eren's always bothering me," you said. You quickly help Carla rearrange things before getting a grocery bag and opening the door for her, so she could step out with you. "He sulks all the time."

Carla laughed before ruffling your head. "He's only like that because he likes you."

"Oh, Carla!" You heard your mother call out, making you pause. "Are you accompanying [Name]? You don't have to."

"Don't worry, it's nothing!" Carla responded cheerfully, placing a hand on your shoulder as she turns her head. "I'll take care of her!"

You didn't even have the bravery to turn around and look at your mother, afraid that if you did, you'd break down and run to her, knowing her fate. You'd beg her to come with you. It hurt you every lifetime to know that you never really got to know your mother, or that she never got to know you.

"Bye, Mama," you said, just glancing back and waving. Your fingers are frozen stiff. "I love you."

With the voice of a child, you speak with the quavering pitch of adult devastation.

"I love you too, my dear!"

It's the last time you'd ever speak to your mother in this life, the last time you'd ever get to tell her that you love her. You didn't know how you've managed to come this far, letting her die again and again. It added to the tally of beloved things you've sacrificed for Eren.

You and Carla turned a corner and she chuckled at the way your lips turned down in a pout. "You're so sweet to your mother, [Name]. Ah, I wish Eren was still like that with me."

You looked at her earnestly. "Eren does love you."

"I suppose it's just natural for boys to become a bit mean and rash when they reach a certain age. Though, Eren is a year younger than you — I can't expect him to be as mature."

"It's good for him," you said, with a strangely judicious solemnity, as if you were an adult. "Acting like a child while he still can."

Carla stared, then covered her mouth and laughed. "Haha, [Name]! Your mother was right, you are an old soul—"

A clap of thunder crackled through the air. The ground shook, and out of instinct, Carla took hold of your arm to steady you. You gulped, readying yourself for the horror that was Shiganshina. It marked the start of every other horror that was yet to come.

Everyone in the vicinity began to scream and point as a huge red hand crept across the Wall's high point. Then, the whole entrance exploded, sending a huge crushed boulder flying which you knew landed on Eren's house and killed your mother at that very moment.

Carla shrieked and immediately grabbed your hand. "[Name], quick, fetch your mother. We have to run!"

"But... my mama..."

"Mom!"

You heard Eren's frantic scream, the same tone you had heard in previous lives. He and Mikasa came into view, running full speed. Carla cried out in relief and embraced her two children.

"Quickly," she told them, "we have to fetch [Name]'s mother, too."

"But..." You trailed off.

Eren took your hand in his, squeezing it tightly. "Come on!"

With that, he took off running without allowing you to protest, not even once, still holding your hand, back the road you and Carla had walked. Carla and Mikasa ran after, following you.

No—you couldn't possibly do this. It was always difficult to say goodbye to your mama, who loved you so much, whom you had allowed to die eight times.

Sure enough, when you arrived to find Eren's house obliterated and your own house crushed under a rock, you saw the splatters of your mama's blood spilling from under the boulder. You hated to think of her body there, still warm, and about to spend the next few months rotting until you'd return to Shiganshina years later and enter the basement like before.

You couldn't help it — you were a child in this body, and this was always a heavy, emotional pain for you. You wailed like a wounded animal and swayed, Eren catching you in his arms. Where you were shaking, his grip and gaze were firm.

"We can't stay here," he said. He looked up at his mom, whose balled fist was trembling, then at Mikasa, who looked very sorrowful for you. "Stay with us."

In the distance, you heard the stomping. The Titans had arrived. The blonde Titan, whom you knew was Dina Fritz, neared.

The familiar sound of ODM gear echoed. Hannes had arrived and instructed the four of you to head to the boats. You wiped your tears, said goodbye, and took off running with everyone else.

The boat let you on. Carla wrapped her arms around the three of you tightly, and you let her and Eren hold you as you sailed off to Wall Rose.

While the three of them were merely silent in shock, you were weeping. This time, you were the one sobbing in Eren's arms as he held you on the boat.

After you met with Armin and his grandpa at the makeshift evacuation site, you watched as Eren, Mikasa, and Carla reunited with Grisha. They were crying, holding each other. They were the lucky ones. A complete family was a rarity; not all survivors could claim they had such luxury.

They even included you in their hugs, which surprised you in your tired state. Maybe you'd be like Mikasa now — an orphan taken in as a daughter and sister.

"Come with me, all of you," said Grisha. "Bring Armin and his grandfather, too. Doctors are given special living priority. I can bring you there."

So, you trudged with the group. It felt relieving to be surrounded by adults as opposed to before when it was just the four of you struggling to survive in a society that outcasts you. You could zone out and know someone else was feeding you, which was how it should have been. It disturbed you to realize how fast you had been forced to grow up.

You slept comfortably in bed that night. No pain. No hardship of a child in war.

There is no trigger for Eren to do the Rumbling.

Despite your grief, you slept well.

-

"Children, are you sure you want to push through with this?" Carla sighed, reaching up to brush Eren's hair out of his face. He let her, acting kinder to his mom after Shiganshina. He had grown so much taller in the past year.

"Mom, we've talked about this," he said. "It's either military or we work in the fields. We want to be military!"

"It's dangerous."

"We want to, Auntie," you said firmly, placing a hand on Eren's shoulder. "The four of us will join the military. I promise you, we are strong enough to survive."

Eren smiled at you, pleased by your resolve. He threw a casual arm around your shoulder. "See, Mom? [Name] is sure about this."

"Alright, alright," said Carla, wiping her eyes. "It's just—you're my babies. You're growing up so fast."

She surprised both you and Eren in a tight hug. You and he looked at each other over her shoulder as she squeezed you, patting her back and telling her you'd miss her too.

"Carla, are you done mother-henning the kids yet?"

Grisha exited the house. It was a beautiful, simple house in a town within Wall Rose. It was big enough for a family of six, which is what you were now. Safe. Comforting and familiar.

Mikasa and Armin were helping him bring out the bags. A carriage was waiting to take you to the south.

"Bye, Auntie, Doctor."

"Bye Mom, Dad! Promise, I'll write home every week!"

The four of you waved goodbye as the carriage sped away from Carla and Grisha. You continued to the Southern Cadet Corps. Your eyes scanned Eren's. He still had the same determination and resolve. You wondered what would change about him now.

"Hey, [Name], can you check this letter I wrote for Mom?"

You were standing outside of Eren's dorm. The night was cold, a chill biting your skin as you and him sat down on the steps of the wooden porch. You could faintly hear the other boys roughhousing inside. You deeply appreciated that Eren never tried to be such a boy around you. Although he was occasionally tactless, he had always done his best to be kind and caring. He was never mean to you in an attempt to impress the other boys. He was simply Eren, the one you've always known.

In this world where his mother was alive, he was considerably nicer and less angry at the world. Yes, he hated the Titans, but that would always be constant about him, and at least this time he wasn't furious because they ate his mother. He was very much a good son, much more gracious and benevolent after the trauma that had nearly taken his family away from him.

You flipped open the letter. Like Armin, you were always the intelligent one between you and Eren. You scanned through his messy scrawl, talking about how okay he is and that he's getting better, that you were a pretty amazing soldier and extremely smart, and—

"Okay, that's enough," Eren said abruptly, snatching the letter from you. You snorted and poked his stomach, booing.

"Aw, 'Ren!" you said. "I want to finish."

"No way," he said. "You just had to make sure I had no spelling mistakes. Mom gets annoyed when there are."

You hummed and leaned your chin on his shoulder. You wrapped your arms around his middle, ignoring the way he began to sputter. Having lived with him under one roof before you entered the training camp, you were more physically affectionate. But Eren was entering his awkward teenage years now, and it was getting hard for him to ignore your touch.

It ached to know that he could never be yours, a dull pain right over your heart, but you tried to think positively. Eren would be different now, not the one who orchestrated a massacre.

"We've come so far," you said, looking at Eren through the mirror. He paused and then tilted his head to look you in the eye. "You and I are such a great team."

"Course we have." His lips pulled. "Since we were kids."

"I'm glad we are," you say.

How long had it been since you met in Shiganshina—six years? How many years have you technically been alive? You were probably over a hundred years old. That meant Eren was also over a hundred years old because you were the same age. That was horrible. Yet it meant he had been the one with you all this time. All these years were with him.

And so you blurted: "You know I love you, right?"

Eren froze, stiffening in your hold.

Stars were twinkling in the sky above you, a constellation of empty promises and broken dreams on a cloudless night. The moon shone on his face, catching the conflict in his emerald hues. There was nothing in this world you would ever find more beautiful than him. Not the sun, not the stars. He was spectacular. Loving him was easy.

"Dunno if I ever told you," you said. It was truthful, but there was so much you left unsaid. "I just figured you should know. You... you're my best friend, 'Ren. The best I've ever had."

"Right, your brother," said Eren, eyes dulling. "I'm family to you."

You bit your lower lip. You've said what you wanted to say. But you didn't say more. You didn't know how long you could spend your life pretending like you didn't ache for him. Everything you did was for him.

Why?

You pondered on this.

The answer was easy, and it was because you simply loved him that much.

You used to believe that it was because you and Eren had been best friends since childhood, thick as thieves. Now, you weren't sure. Your heart was beating for him. You were so desperate to find solutions, to find reasons to live, because this was not about saving Paradis anymore. Somewhere along the lines, it had become about Eren.

Eren didn't say anything back. He merely hummed, the same way you did, and turned his body so he was the one laying on your shoulder. That way, you didn't have to look at each other blushing.

You glanced at him, unsure of what he was thinking. Eren watched you, and you felt like he could see everything, like he was drinking in every slight movement of your expression, reading and understanding you to your very core.

You tried not to regret all the things you never said. You listened to his breathing, slow and steady.

"You have dirt on your face," Eren pointed out, brushing a thumb against your cheek to wipe it.

Your cheeks inflamed immediately. "Thanks."

-

"I don't understand," said Eren, looking down at the letter in his hands. "What does Mom mean, that Dad is sick?"

"We've been summoned back home," you said gently. It didn't occur to you that you had referred to Eren's own family and house as home. "Your father... Eren, it's important."

"We're only allowed to suddenly visit home when there's an emergency," he said fiercely. "Like—like when someone is dying."

Armin and Mikasa were looking at him with sorrowful expressions. "Eren."

"But—Dad's a doctor!" he said. "He can cure himself, can't he?"

At that moment, Commander Shadis rapped on the door. "Jaeger, [Surname], Ackerman, Arlert—you've got to get going."

The four of you exited, where the wagon to take you back home awaited you. Eren's eyes were distant and morose. Shadis glanced at him, almost pitiful, knowing that Grisha had no time left. Grisha and Carla's son was in denial. But you knew, too. Grisha's thirteen years were almost up. He needed his son, his successor.

When you arrived home, Carla bounded to her son, crying into his shoulder. She hugged you too before allowing you to see Grisha. He was bedridden, his brown hair overrun with streaks of silver. You quietly spoke to him, promising that you'd take care of yourself and his family, and that was it before you and the other two left the room to let him speak to his son.

There was one last request. To be able to walk with his son in the woods.

Your spine crawled. You knew what the true intention was. Eren was going to be turned into a Titan.

Sure enough, Eren returned alone.

He couldn't remember a single thing that happened to him at that moment.

All he could tell his weeping mother was that his father had chosen to die in the forest.

You held Carla as the police officials searched for the body, knowing that they would find none. You glanced at Eren, who had no idea that he had been the one to rip it to shreds. You both agreed that it was awful.

Thirteen.

That had been the amount of years Grisha could live with the Titan powers until it spelled the end for him.

A shiver passed through you. That was the same number you had been allotted until it was over for you, too.

-

"That's my son!" Carla screeched, ignoring the Survey Corps guards who were trying to hold her back from further entering the headquarters. "Who does Captain Levi think he is, kicking him in a courtroom? He's just a boy!"

"Auntie Carla!" you called, hurrying over the moment you heard. The guards gratefully let you into her arms as she frantically checked you. "It's alright! Eren is fine."

"What have they done to you?" she cried. "To my son?"

"Eren's a..." Your voice faltered. "Eren—the rumors are true, Auntie. Eren is a Titan."

Carla's eyes moistened. She stiffened and wiped her eyes. "But that's my baby. He can't..."

"He is," you confirmed. "But it's not a bad thing! He's humanity's hope!"

She smoothened your brown jacket and pulled you in for a hug. "[Name], thank you. I can't quite understand everything yet, but I know you've been taking care of him. Thank you. You've been calling me Auntie for too long, you might as well start calling me Mom too."

"Oh, well—"

"Not to replace your mother, of course," she added. She took your face in her hands and weakly smiled, seeing how much you've grown. "It's just that I see you as my daughter, too."

"Mom?"

Carla turned, drawing in a gasp. "Eren!"

Eren let out a choked sob, and he ran down the hallway to capture his mother in a hug. Behind him, you could see Levi and the rest of his squad, who had been murmuring unhappily, but when they saw Eren hugging what was clearly his mother, they considerably softened. Even Levi reluctantly held back from scolding Eren for running off.

"I'm okay, Mom," he said through the tears, holding his sobbing mother. "Really. I'm going to train and master this power inside me. I can heal fast and grow back my body parts, so you don't have to worry."

"But it's dangerous, Eren!" she chastised. "What did I tell you about the Survey Corps?"

"My best bet as a soldier is here," he said. He looked over at you, and he gave you a small smile. "And [Name] is with me too. You know she won't let anything happen to me."

"That's true, that's true," she sniffled. "It's just... I miss you two babies so much. You've grown so much, and you've gotten so brave, going into that hell over and over again..."

"Mom—Carla," you sighed. You were embarrassed about the slip-up. "I promise you. I'm practically dedicating my life and heart to Eren."

"Promise me, you will come back, both of you," she said, grabbing yours and Eren's hands. "And write. I need a letter updating me. Weekly!"

"Of course, Carla."

"You got it, Mom."

"I love you both," she said, bringing you both in for a hug. You were so overwhelmed that even you felt like shedding a tear. It was completely different having a mother love you. "Please be safe."

Your voice was choked as you spoke. "I love you too, Carla."

"I love you too, Mom."

When you let go, she brought Eren in for one last hug, and then he had to go back to his squad. She left, promising to be back tomorrow.

Eren touched your arm.

"I love my Mom so much," he said wistfully. "I can't let anything bad happen to her. It's why I have to come home."

"You've got something to lose now," you said with a sad smile.

"Yeah," he mulled. "And you too. She thinks you're her daughter-in-law, so you've got to come home too."

"Daughter-in-what?"

"Ah, you know my mom," he said, rolling his eyes. "She's always been saying that we'd getting married someday, and she badly wants you to be part of the family, she thinks you're God's gift to the Walls."

You blinked. It had never occurred to you that Carla was rooting for you to get with Eren. Eren said it to you in a way that told you he didn't take his mother's words seriously, but you knew that she must have teased him about it growing up, at least. Eren's cheeks were reddening, like he was a little kid again.

"Well, do you?" you asked.

Eren stopped. "Do I what?"

"Do you want me to be part of your family?"

He choked. "Hey, what kind of question is that?"

You laughed. He was your best friend, whom you loved to tease and joke with. But this was different. "Better put a ring on it, 'Ren, before Armin takes me away."

"Yeah, right," he snorted. "Like you'd ever be attracted to Armin."

But his voice was controlled, almost like he was on edge at the idea that his other best friend even had a chance. The muscle twitched in his cheek. You didn't comment on it—you never did.

You'd thought about trying to date someone. You've had years to cope with the fact that a relationship with Eren was not feasible, because it meant that you'd be directly messing with him and it could affect the timeline, and you'd be lying if you said you hadn't considered 'moving on' in a more concrete way. You didn't want to do Jean dirty again. Your relationship with Connie was too platonic.

"I have, though," you said.

Eren perked up. "Have what?"

"Considered Armin."

He deflated like a balloon. "You've... oh."

Eren tried to imagine it. You and Armin. Yes, it would make sense. You and he got along very well, having such similar personalities. He was sweet, intelligent, and thoughtful. Even if others sometimes mistook him for a girl due to his fine, feminine features. He'd lose the baby fat, cut his hair, and grow into a handsome young man. Of course, you'd be attracted to Armin.

"I mean it's nothing serious," you said quickly. "I just... oh, it's stupid."

"It's not. Tell me."

"I guess I've been looking for someone to date," you said sheepishly, rubbing the back of your neck. "Armin just seemed like a pretty great match for me."

And for a guilty second Eren honestly thought: Why not me?

Didn't you see? He had always been there, in front of you. By all rights, he had been the first to ever look at you in the way a lover did. If it had been up to him, you'd be dating someone who loved you and made you feel wanted in this cruel world. If anything, it should make sense. You would make sense together. You obviously cared for Eren more than anyone else. And while he did love many people, you had a special place in his heart and it was not because you were best friends.

"But I just can't date anyone," you said. "You?"

"Uhh... I don't really know. Mikasa, I guess? I mean, she cares for me, doesn't she?"

"Yeah."

"Yeah. I wouldn't go out with someone if they weren't caring, I guess."

"Makes sense." You turned a corner and found a small bench. You sat down, but Eren stood, leaning his head against the wall and studying the way you slouched.

"What do you think about it?"

"Think about what?"

"Me and Mikasa. Or me getting a girlfriend."

You frowned at him. "What are you talking about?"

Eren rolled his eyes, tapping his foot impatiently. "Are you sad? Angry? Exasperated? Pleased?"

"Why would I be angry?" You bit your tongue, and shoved another sentence out with the same level of defensiveness: "Or sad, or anything? Why would it matter to me what you do with your relationships?"

Eren chuckled, but a level of bitterness boiled beneath. "I thought you might have an opinion. Care about it, maybe?"

"I don't. You can get married for all I care. Give Carla the daughter she wants. Mikasa's already part of your family anyway. I'm just an outsider."

"You're not an—" Eren exasperatedly stopped. "Whatever. Good luck getting a boyfriend, I guess. I'll be happy for you."

"You don't sound happy."

"'Cause by the sound of it, you're desperately trying to date some loser."

You abruptly stood, furious and glaring. "You never know when to shut up, Eren."

He glowered, the irrational anger filling him just as much as the insult had to you. Eren was so predictable. The only reason why he was saying that now was because he was jealous about the idea of Armin taking his spot as the most important boy in your life, which was technically true. It frightened and annoyed you, how intense his emotions were. You left him there, steaming.

He seethed, hatred for whatever guy you wanted to get with already planting in his mind.

-

Eren stood at the port of Paradis as his mother fussed over his belongings.

He was older now, and his hair reached his shoulders. His mother was tying his tie and straightening his suit. She insisted that he looked very handsome and gentlemanly, which of course was usually just a line that mothers say. But you did compliment him earlier, eyes passing over him longingly, and somehow he found himself believing it.

Just then, you passed by, with red eyes that showed that you had been crying. You were wearing modern clothes too — a blouse and a skirt that showed your legs which had made Eren's throat bob with a swallow. But that wasn't important. You were obviously sad about something.

"[Name]...?" he asked, trailing off.

You didn't answer, ignoring him completely as you yanked your bag with you and stepped on the gangway to get on the boat that was to take you all to Marley.

Mikasa appeared, jogging briskly to keep up. Apparently, she had been trying to comfort or talk to you, but you just wouldn't budge. She stopped in front of Eren and Carla and watched with concern as you disappeared onto the boat.

"Oh, Mikasa, what happened to [Name]?" asked Carla kindly.

Mikasa darkened. "It's her boyfriend. Or should I say, ex-boyfriend."

Eren perked up, suddenly interested. "Oh?"

"He accused [Name] of cheating on him with you, Eren," said Mikasa, and seeing the sour look on Eren's face, she raised her hands. "I know it's not true. But he was genuinely emotional about it. He never liked that [Name] had close male friends."

"He was always an asshole."

"Eren, language," Carla said, pinching his arm. He winced.

"I'm 18, Mom."

"Well, since you're such an adult now, you ought to go comfort [Name]. She needs someone. Poor girl. She was with him for what, a year?"

"It was just six months, Mom," Eren grumbled. "That's barely anything."

Mikasa raised her brows. "You've been keeping count?"

Eren glared at her. "[Name] is my best friend. It's only natural I should be aware."

"Right."

"Anyway, we've got to go, Mom," said Eren. He leaned down to kiss his mother on the cheek, and she hugged him tightly. "I'll promise to be safe, love you."

She also hugged Mikasa before she and Eren boarded the boat.

Eren found you by the stern immediately. You were furiously wiping your eyes with your sleeve. When you heard him call your name, you froze, like a deer caught by a hunter. Eren leaned on the railing beside you, you turned your body away, unwilling to let him close, but he grabbed your shoulders and forced you to face him.

"Hey, look at me, [Name]."

"I... I can't."

Eren took your chin and gently made you face him. "[Name], you didn't deserve him."

"He was..."

"A loser," he finished. He shook you slightly. "He wasn't good enough for you. C'mon. You're literally amazing."

You exhaled shakily, and let out a small, choked laugh. "Yeah?"

"Yeah," said Eren. "You're a brave hero. He's just some guy. And no offense, but he wasn't good-looking enough for you, too."

You laughed, leaning into him. It had been a while since you were this close to Eren. You had drifted over the past few months, with your fear of getting close to him and experiencing heartbreak coupled with the desire to please your partner by staying away, but you'd forgotten just how lovely it was to be close to Eren.

He was the person that cheered you up and made you laugh. He wasn't like your partner, who only loved you because you were a trophy of sorts, being such a high-ranking Scout with battle experiences. Eren knew you, really knew you—your hopes and dreams, your fears, what your ugly laugh sounded like, your tears, everything.

"You should be with someone who loves you," said Eren. He was cupping your face in his hands like he had no idea how you could ever think that you were worthy of being broken up with. "Really, [Name]. I don't know how he could let you go."

The air shifted between you two, calm and gentle. It was the comfort of all your years together.

"And you know, I never really told you this back when we were younger," he said. He was looking down at his shoes, the leather that hadn't been quite broken in yet. "But you're my best friend and I do love you. I love you too."

"Eren—"

"Because I do. So much that it scares me. And I... I know you see me as your brother, but..."

He trailed off, and you trembled, heart beating, unbelieving. There was no way that even in this life, when you had been in a relationship with someone else again, and constantly reminded Eren that being best friends was all you would amount to, he was in love with you. No way you'd made him fall for you. Wasn't he always your best friend? Wasn't this always how it was? Why now?

You swallowed. "Thank you, Eren. I'm so grateful for you."

To prevent him from saying anything else, you abruptly hugged him, squeezing tightly. You breathed in his scent and basked in his familiarity. It was comforting to be with someone who had known you for this long. He was the only thing you were sure of. He hugged you back.

In Marley, after the forum, he exited and went around to walk by himself.

He was quiet, contemplating the world. The destruction. The horror. Same old.

What would Mom think?

Eren thought of the way his mother doted on you like you were her daughter. The way she pushed him to go after you and provide a semblance of comfort. His mom would hate for him to inflict the same hell that you had all gone through years ago. He hadn't forgotten the way you cried in his arms when he saw your mother die. He just couldn't possibly see how he could do that to any other person. He had been raised by his mother and he was not an orphan. Because of that, he had a better heart.

Eren turned on his heel and went home to you.

Like you expected and planned, he did not run further into Marley.

The Rumbling did not happen — at its initial phase, anyway.

Zeke appeared at his doorstep back in Paradis, and surprisingly, Carla still treated him with kindness, not minding the fact that he was her husband's child from another woman. As far as Carla was concerned, he was Eren's brother all the same, which Eren was not exactly happy about.

But some things didn't change, and that included war against the rest of the world. As soon as the planes from Marley closed in, Eren knew he couldn't stand by and watch. He had a family to protect. His mom. His friends. You.

"Eren, no," you breathed out, grabbing his sleeve as you and Carla crouched down, bombs raining from the sky. "I know it's bad, but—please."

"I have no choice," he said solemnly. He gripped you, making you promise to keep his mom safe. "I must keep moving forward."

With Zeke, they released the Rumbling and plowed the earth, and everything still went the same way it did. This time, his drive for the Rumbling remained the same, but without the burning seed of hatred. It was the seed of defense. Love.

You couldn't change the way you had to kill him again.

The moment the dust after the Rumbling settled, and Mikasa was about to bring Eren's head down, you took your chance. Before Armin could react, or prevent you from doing anything at all, especially when you declared you just couldn't live in a world where Eren wasn't alive, you brought your sword out and stabbed yourself.

You didn't see the loop end, but you knew Carla had wept for you.

Her death had been a trigger for Eren, but her life had still given Eren a reason to fight. It was unswayable, carved into every fiber of his being like ancient stone. There was nothing you could do to change it, not even saving his mother.

-

A/N: This was not beta read because my final electrical engineering physics exam ever is this week (I'm so relieved I'll never have to take this godawful subject again, when I tell you I'd rather fight a Titan than ever take one more physics unit) & we die like [Name] every chapter. My notes are: (1) Eren in this fic reminds me of the song You Belong With Me, (2) I tallied all the ages that [Name] has been so far, and she's 148 years old, and (3) I love fics where Carla lives, it reminds me of fics from 2014 AoT.