I live near Windsor Castle, where Queen Elizabeth spends most of her weekends, but if the many   visitors are hoping to catch a glimpse of her they will most often be disappointed.

Windsor winds around its castle
Snug against the castle walls.
Tourist throng the nearby cobbles.
Seldom see the Queen at all.

Castle seen for miles around.
Surveys the river down below.
Feed the swans, boat on the river,
You'll seldom see the Queen you know.

Cross the river into Eton
Britain's most exclusive school
Doubt you'll see a royal person
Doesn't happen as a rule.

Catch the changing of the guard;
Guardsmen coming up the hill.
Hear a marching military band.
But no Queen; she's not seen still.

Peascod Street's the one for shopping
But the Queen has loads to wear
Doubt you'll catch her out for shopping
Most unlikely she'll be there.

Long Walk; Copper Horse and back
Comes out the castle at its rear.
Windsor Great Park, on to Ascot
Seldom sight of the Queen I fear.

Best you come for state occasions
If a sight of her you crave
She'll oblige you from her carriage
Fleeting glimpse of that royal wave.