Chapter 36

The pitcher of ale slips from her fingers, bouncing off the lap of the burly Enforcer and shattering violently as it collides with the ground.

"What the hell?" The Enforcer leaps clumsily to his feet, knocking the table and sloshing more ale over the rims of our mugs. I duck my eyes and make a grab for my stein, holding it low to hide the sudden shaking in my hands.

"I-" Lara's breathy voice is as familiar as my own heartbeat. "I'm so sorry. Here, let me...." There is the sound of a stinging slap as he bats her hand away. I flinch involuntarily with the old instinct to protect her.

"Relax, Tomas. It was an accident." Sam has reached a hand down to help Lara to her feet. She stumbles momentarily on the train of her skirt, revealing a distinct tremor in her knees.

"Lara, this our new friend, Frye."

Nothing for it. I tear my eyes away from the ground and up to her, extending my hand as I force every last ounce of concentration I have into keeping my face blank and my shoulders from quaking.

"Frye." She exhales my brother's name, barely audible as she timidly inserts her hand into mine. I suppress a shudder of revulsion at the feeling of her cool palm and limp grip. Her blue eyes are wide with astonishment as she searches my face. I fight the urge to look away, withdrawing my hand quickly.

"Nice to meet you." I mumble. Shit. I can't think. Everything about her; her voice, her hair, godsdamn it, even her scent is exactly the same. It's as though not a second has passed between now and our days spent laughing together in my attic apartment.

Except so much has changed.

Everything has changed.

The murderous rage born of betrayal and confusion burns through me, clouding my thoughts and distorting my judgement. Clearly, she recognizes me. Any doubt she felt would have been extinguished the moment she heard Frye's name. Now what?

Do not trust her.

Never. Never again.

A single word from Lara about my true identity and these fickle new friends of mine will have the alarm raised instantly. In their drunken state I would have no trouble taking on the lot of them, but where would that leave me? The bar is teeming with more off-duty Enforcers. My time in Babel would be over before it has even begun.

My hands curl into fists at my sides and I swallow the lump of bile that has risen in my throat. As much as it disgusts me to admit it, she has me over a barrel. I need to get us both out of here, immediately.

"That's a bit rude, innit? Frye, where are your manners?" Sam's heavy hand pats me hard on the back, startling me back into the present. "What's the matter with you? Don't you think she's pretty?"

All colour has drained from Lara's face but she still manages a weak laugh.

"I-" I cough. "Of course I do."

"Or maybe blonde and beautiful isn't your type, eh?" The ale-soaked Enforcer to my right digs his elbow painfully into my ribs. "Don't tell me you ain't never been with a woman, soldier."

I push him off of me. "I've been with plenty."

"Oh ho, is that right? Tender little lad like you probably has them lined up 'round the block." He tugs on my head scarf and I grab for it desperately, dodging out of his way and hurriedly tucking my hair back inside.

"Look at 'im blush! Told you this one was still an innocent." The Enforcer grabs for my scarf again and I shove my chair back, nearly colliding with Lara who lowers herself gracefully into my lap, firmly inserting herself between us.

"Now, now. Don't tease him." Her fingers are gentle as she subtly pushes a strand of red hair under my wrapping. I clench my jaw tightly and stiffen at her touch, familiar and vile at the same time.

"Come on, Lara. Don't be wastin' your time on this kid." The boorish Enforcer, Tomas, leans forward and places his large hand on her knee, fingering the material of her dress. "Wouldn't you rather have a real man warm your bed tonight?"

Enough of this.

"Her bed will be plenty warm." I say, keeping my voice low. Without another word I cup Lara's chin in my hand and pull her towards me, pressing my lips against hers.

Her slender arms wrap themselves around my neck, pulling me closer and deepening the kiss. I can feel the feverish beat of her heart from where her breast presses against mine. There is the spark of something indistinguishable between us; a million shared moments and harboured resentments. An undeniable history intertwining us for all of eternity.

Her full lips are soft and her breath is sweet. Her brassy hair is silken beneath my fingertips. I hold her tightly against me for an extra moment before releasing her, shooting Tomas a contemptuous look as Lara grabs my hand and pulls me to my feet.

I can't help but feel a twinge of triumph, slinging my arm casually around Lara's shoulders and throwing a wink at the wide-eyed Enforcers as I steer her towards the gate. I have neglected to pay for my drinks but right now that is the least of my worries. Together we push our way through the rambunctious throng, heading into the abandoned streets.

Darkness coats us as we turn our backs to the bar. I make to remove my arm from around her shoulders but she holds my hand firmly, pinning me in place.

"Wait." She murmurs. "Just until we get back to my flat. These streets are full of meddlesome spies."

"I'm not going anywhere with you." I hiss under my breath, deliberately avoiding eye contact with a rowdy group of Enforcers as they shoulder their way past us.

"You need somewhere to stay tonight. It's not safe to be out past curfew, Enforcer or not."

"I've managed to get this far on my own."

"Then you've been very lucky up until now. The Enforcers have to log their arrival at the barracks, what was your plan for when they notice you aren't on the list?"

"I won't sleep at the barracks. I'll find somewhere else."

"Where, exactly? Babel isn't a holiday destination. Far from it." She draws a shaky breath. "There is an order here. The Madam strictly monitors each citizen. It's only a matter of time until someone notices that you aren't on the record."

I rub my forehead with my free hand, desperately trying to force my thoughts into action. The stress of the last few days in combination with Lara's unexpected presence is wreaking havoc on my instincts. What I really want to do is sleep. I want to curl up on the floor, be it filthy ground or plush pillows and shut my eyes to the madness my world has become. More than anything I want to give over to my exhaustion, releasing every uncertainty and allowing myself to drift away into the darkness.

"I can't trust you." I grimace at my own frank statement, unable to keep myself from falling into old habits. No more, I remind myself. This is no longer an honest relationship. It never will be again.

She doesn't respond but slows her pace, steering us off the path and into the shadows over a patch of plush grass. Her dark blue eyes communicate a warning as they dart once over my shoulder, towards the sound of approaching voices. Another gaggle of Enforcers are headed this way and judging by the look on Lara's face, it would be wise to avoid their attention.

I release a sigh of frustration. Thankfully, that would be believable to anyone watching Lara's bronzed arms snake their way around my back, pulling me closer. I keep my face lowered towards her neck, breathing shallowly in an effort to keep from inhaling too much of her.

The voices of the Enforcers linger behind me as the men throw crude comments our way, their boorish laughter peeling through the damp air and echoing off the skyscrapers surrounding us. Eventually they lose interest and slowly amble away, still mocking. I shut my eyes tight and Will's words suddenly spring to mind, unchecked.

Attack with your head, not your heart.

I need Lara's help. Gods help me, at this moment I depend on her. True, I could shove her away and hide myself in Babel. I could attempt to circumvent this city's strict system solo, relying on my instincts to avoid the Madam's prying eyes. However, I have to admit that would not be nearly as effective as having a local on my side.

I must remember that this isn't about my hurt. This is about Will, Marc, Noah and every other person trapped in those accursed levels buried beneath this atrocious dome. Whatever feelings of vengeance and self-pity I may harbour are meaningless in the larger scheme of things.

My heart tells me that the traitorous girl trapped a hair's breadth from my lips is a letch deserving of everything she has wrought.

But my head. My head tells me that she can help us.

Or kill us all, but I'll have to worry about that later.

The voices recede into the distance and I pull back from Lara's neck. Her wide eyes dart across my face, as if memorizing something. She raises her fingers to my cheek for an instant before withdrawing, placing a hand absently in her hair as she continues to watch me.

"I know you don't trust me." Her voice is low but still carries her trademark huskiness. "But please believe me when I tell you that you are going to need a friend if you are to stand a chance of surviving in Babel. The truth of the matter is that right now, I'm the best friend you have."

"Second-best. You forgot about the worms churning out all this vegetation." I draw a shaky breath, straightening. "I won't be fooled twice, Lara. If I agree to go with you and wake up to a sword at my throat again so help me gods...."

"You won't." She says quickly, grasping my hand where it has curled unconsciously into a fist. "You won't." Her voice has taken on that soft, mothering quality that has given me comfort so many times in the past. For the barest instance I soften before I catch myself and yank my hand back, furling and unfurling my fingers.

"We can't linger out here any longer." She maneuvers around me and back onto the path, waiting for me to step up next to her and reluctantly wrap my arm around her shoulders. Together we twist through several more blocks before finally pulling up in front of a nondescript building draped in red curtains.

Lara taps her knuckles against the door in a complicated sequence and it swings open, emitting a pleasant rush of warm air and soft music. A plump, imposing woman steps back to admit us, eyeing me warily. I give her an awkward nod as Lara grips me by the wrist and leads me inside.

I dart my eyes around discretely while Lara pulls me to the stairs. Two beautiful girls lounge on cushy settes in front of a crackling fire. They smile at me knowingly as I am dragged past, one of them waving at me with her pinky finger. I grin dopily for their benefit and turn to follow Lara up the winding staircase.

The doors on each subsequent floor are shut firmly, but not tight enough to completely muffle the sounds of giggling and grunting occurring behind them. The smell of opium hits my nostrils intermittently, threatening to dampen my senses. I shake my head to clear it, concentrating on Lara's back as she leads me ever-higher. I consider the fact that escape from this brothel should be simple enough should a situation call for it. Babel's extensive scaffolding system would give me ample opportunity for flight, so long as I can get to a window in time. With this knowledge I step a little more confidently, mentally counting off the floors until Lara finally halts on a landing and pulls a tiny bronze key from her pocket.

"Here we are." The lock clicks and she pushes the door open, disappearing inside. I follow slowly, glancing about as I step through the doorframe.

The room is modest, boasting only a single window and decorated with a variety of plush cushions and colourful drapings. A wide, inviting mattress has been placed prominently in the centre of the space, obviously meant to be the focal point. Lara has moved to the small vanity set back against the far wall. She looks up from unclasping her earring and gestures at me to close the door.

I pull the door closed and stroll from one end of the room to the other, checking for hidden closets and compartments. Lara stays perfectly silent but for the sound of her jewelry being placed on the desk, waiting patiently as I lean out the window and take stock of the placement of the nearest scaffolding.

"Satisfied?" She asks when I pull my head back inside. I shoot her a dirty look, making to sit down on the bed before thinking better of it and instead crouching pertly on one of the cushions.

"What are you doing here, Lara?" I ask, removing my gloves and unwinding the dark scarf from my head, shaking out my mass of hair.

She doesn't answer immediately. I glance up, watching her as she stares at her reflection in the mirror over the vanity. She looks smaller, more delicate having removed every heavy piece of jewelry except for the large necklace sitting across her collarbones. The necklace is beautiful, made of hammered gold and flashing in the low lamplight. I think back to how she always wished to see herself adorned in finery and bitterly lament that she should be happy now.

Judging by her expression in the mirror, she is anything but. Dark circles ring her eyes and she appears wan, wasted.

"I was taken." She reaches for the china bowl on the edge of the vanity, pulling it towards her and withdrawing a soaked cloth. "After the Revolution I fled to the Wastelands. They found me out there."

"You went into the Wastelands?" I balk. "Why? Were you alone?"

"I couldnt very well stay in the City, could I?" Her voice rises an octave before she quells it, carefully running the washcloth across her lips and cheeks.

"That's absurd, Lara. You could have stayed. If your problem was seeing me you could have gone to the Outer City."

"It wasn't just that I didn't want to see you, Kay." She rubs vigorously at her forehead.

"Then why did you leave?"

'What does it matter? I'm here now. What I want to tell you is that I made a mistake."

I release a bitter laugh. "That is a fact I am not contesting in any way."

"Then why are you forcing me to dredge up the past?" She sighs, tossing the cloth back into the dish and ringing it out forcefully.

"Poor Lara. Trust me, whatever hardships you have suffered, I can match them tenfold." I lean forward, resting my forearms on my knees. "Why did you go into the Wastelands?"

"I didn't go alone." She turns to face me fully. "There were several of us."

"Courtiers?"

"Yes, Courtiers."

I nod, slowly. "Went in search of a hierarchy that better suited your fancy, did you?"

She grimaces her acknowledgement. "We heard rumours of a hidden city that allowed everyone to live as an Courtier. We set off East down the river but didn't make it two days before we were spotted by an airship and gassed."

I finger my throat, remembering the choking nerve gas and the terror I felt at its paralyzing effect. "Then what happened?"

"Most of us were sent to the excavation below Babel." She swivels back towards the mirror, eyeing her reflection. "But they said I was pretty enough to stay above, under strict conditions." She touches the gold necklace at her throat, working her fingers around the back of her neck towards the clasp.

An unwelcome ache tugs at my heart. I don't know why I should be surprised or upset at the way Lara chooses to survive. Her welfare is no longer any concern of mine.

There is a soft click as she unclasps the necklace and places it on the vanity. My eyes remain glued to the delicate flesh below her collarbones, at the ugly branding burned into her formerly-flawless skin.

The mark is angry, flashing red in the flickering light. She touches the scar delicately, tracing the pattern from her shoulder to her throat.

"It's a symbol of fertility." She explains woodenly, her gaze trained on the reflection in the mirror. "For now I can guard my womb but eventually I will be assigned to a family so that I can carry their children."

A shudder runs down my spine and I squeeze my eyes shut, pinching the bridge of my nose. "Gods, Lara."

"Go on and judge me, Kay. It's what you do best." The bitterness lies heavy on her tongue. "Some things never change."

"You're right about that."

"It's all very well and good for you to lament my decision, being that you've never been faced with my choice."

I look up, startled at the way her words echo Rowan's. "What was the other option?"

She avoids my eyes by reaching up to uncoil her hair, carefully plucking loose each pin and tossing them down next to the pile of gold jewelry. "Labour."

"I have no interest in gently coaxing this from you, Lara. Tell me everything you know. Now."

Her face reddens. "They're digging. There is a giant pump drilled deep into the earth beneath this place. They labour around the clock, shoveling and drilling."

"Drilling what?" I demand impatiently.

She finally meets my gaze, an incredulous expression drawn across her features. "Water, of course."

The throb behind my eyes pulses cruelly. I stifle a groan as I rub the ache, ignoring the ever-present threat of exhaustion.

"Where did you suppose it came from?" She spreads her arms, as if encompassing the wide canals flowing outside the window. "A place like this doesn't just happen." She lowers her voice. "She makes it happen."

"The Madam." I tear my hands away from my eyes. "Who is she?"

She shrugs her slender shoulders. "No one really knows. Apparently she arrived here nearly a quarter of a century ago and took over, building up a moderate settlement into this colossal dome."

"How can one person just turn up out of nowhere and seize control?" I ask. "What reason do you have to follow her?"

She tilts her head at me slightly, her tone hushed. "Simple. She brings the rain."

I stare at her, disbelieving. "The... what?"

"The rain." She says the word as though it were something sacred, her tone gentle. "She pumps it from the ground and out through the sky. She brings the rain, she brings life."

I think of the plush green foliage sprouting up through every spare inch of Babel, draping itself over the skyscrapers and springing forth a plethora of vegetation. My vision swims and I shake my head to clear it, digging my hand into my tangled hair in an effort to sort through my muddled thoughts.

"I know how you must feel. I was overwhelmed when I first arrived here as well." She has taken on that motherly inflection again as she continues to pull pins free of her hair. "It takes some getting used to but now..." She trails off, studying one of the pins intently. "You know, sometimes I forget there is another world out there. Another life."

I stare at her, my stomach churning as I desperately try to sort through the information, a million questions pooling in my mouth. I grasp onto one discernable fact: my friends are being forced to slave on the Madam's great water pump belowground. At the very least, I now have an understanding of what she wants us for.

"I need to go below." I tell Lara, carefully. "I need to see for myself."

She bites her lip, causing it to swell. "You're here to free them."

I don't respond immediately, concentrating on breathing out evenly between my teeth as I study her. There is no denying that admitting to her why I am in Babel is a dangerous move but from the look on her face I know that she has already guessed the truth.

My silence is her answer and a high colour rises to her cheeks. "You have to take me with you."

"Why should I bother? You seem awfully comfortable here. The fine dresses and jewels suit you." I don't bother to disguise the bitterness in my voice.

She flinches as though struck. "Please, Kay. I can't live this way anymore." Swallowing once, her voice breaking. "I want to go home."

My heart hardens and I turn away. "You have a lot of nerve to ask something from me, Lara."

"I know. I know it's not fair of me to ask anything of you." She says desperately. "But you have to believe me when I say that I am so incredibly sorry for what I did, Kay. Not a day goes by that I don't think about you." She slides off the chair, kneeling next to me on the ground.

Up close her face is stricken and a sheen of moisture glistens from the rims of her eyes. She searches my face, imploring, her hands clasped tightly in her lap as if to keep herself from reaching out to me.

"What did they do..." She whispers.

"I don't want to talk about it." I snap abruptly, turning away.

She sniffs, wringing her hands together. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry." She takes a shaky breath. "What else can I say?"

"Nothing." My voice is cold. "There is nothing you can say to fix what you did. Stop crying, Lara. There's no point to this display."

She brushes a hand across her cheeks, sitting back on her heels. "Please, Kay. I know....I know that I've done some horrible things. But you must be able to find it in your heart to help me?"

I clench my jaw as I stare blankly at the floor beside her knees, not giving her the benefit of letting her see my face. She is manipulating me masterfully, using my weakness against me. Lara knows better than anyone that I've never been able to turn down a person in need and now she is using that certainty to her full advantage. She is nothing if not an opportunist.

"I don't suppose I have much choice, do I?" I drag my eyes up to meet hers. "You'll turn me over to the Enforcers if I refuse."

She gives a tight shake of her head, drawing her brows together. "I wouldn't. I'm not that person anymore."

I scoff. "You are exactly that person, Lara."

"I'm not." She chokes. "I want to make it up to you. Please. I know this place, I can help you get the labourers out."

I stand abruptly, suddenly unable to bear our proximity for a moment longer. Lara draws great, shuddering breaths as I move to the window, peering out.

The scaffolding and streets below us are blessedly empty. I suppose even the barbaric, drunken Enforcers need to go to bed sometime. I pull the glass window panes shut and latch them tightly, just in case.

Turning back around I can see that Lara hasn't moved an inch, save for the slight tremor in her frail shoulders. I cross my arms, leaning back against the window sill and watching her carefully, thinking.

She runs a wrist over her blotchy cheeks. "I understand if you don't want to help me. I still wouldn't turn you in."

"That means nothing to me." I tell her, indifferently. "Your word is worthless."

She hiccups. "I want to begin making things right between us."

"Things will never be right between us again. You ruined any chance of that. You ruined us." I nearly suffocate on the last word and compensate by biting down hard on my tongue, distracting myself with the physical pain.

Her shoulders sag. She appears worn-out, exhausted and broken. I concentrate on the taste of blood, not allowing myself to feel anything for this worthless shell of a person.

The atmosphere is pregnant with Lara's pathetic sobs. I catch a glimpse of the heinous mark scarring her collarbone, flashing red in the lamplight, mocking me.

"All right." I hear myself say, finally breaking the silence. She looks up, wide-eyed.

"Really?" She breathes.

"Yes. If you can help me get them out, then I will take you with me back to the City." I reach down, grasping her by the hand and pulling her to her feet. "Do we have a deal?"

She nods eagerly, a watery smile quivering at her lips. "Thank you, Kay."

"Don't thank me for anything. This is not about you. Let's get one thing perfectly clear: I don't trust you. Not for an instant. If you say or do anything to jeopardize what I am trying to accomplish..."

"I won't."

"Let me finish." I snap, squeezing her fingers forcefully. "If you ruin this for me then I will spend my last breath ensuring that you finish your life as miserable as humanly possible. Do you think things are bad now, Lara? I promise you that it can be a hell of a lot worse."

She swallows, pulling her hand away and clutching it against her chest. "Understood."

"Good." I glance around her room. "First thing's first, I need to rest. Let's get some sleep and in the morning we will discuss how you are going to get me belowground."

"Of course." She hurries over to an open trunk and removes a sampling of clothes for me to sleep in. "You can have the bed tonight and I will sleep on the floor."

"No offense, but I would rather set myself on fire then go anywhere near that bed." I take the clothes from her and begin stripping off my uniform. "I'll set up some cushions near the window."

"Right." She bites her lip and I indicate that she should turn around before pulling the dark tunic off over my head.

"Will your keepers be suspicious if they don't see your gentleman caller leaving through the front door?" I ask, keeping my scarred back turned to the wall as I quickly pull on the change of clothes.

Her brassy hair glimmers when she shakes her head. "No. Our customers usually opt against using our front entrance in the mornings. Most of them prefer to use the grid."

"The grid?"

She gestures vaguely out the window. "That's what the Babelonians call the scaffolding system."

I kick my discarded uniform out from under me and she turns back around, gathering up the dark clothes and folding them neatly.

"Put those somewhere safe." I tell her as I unlatch the window, pushing it open slightly in case I suddenly have to make a speedy exit. "I may need them later."

She nods, stowing the clothes in the bottom drawer of her vanity. I busy myself arranging a pile of cushions in front of the window, watching her from the corner of my eye as she puts away her jewelry and moves to the bed, loosely braiding her hair. The ritual, right down to the way she flips her pillow over twice before lying down is eerily familiar. For the briefest instant I imagine crossing the small room and going to lie down with her, letting her arm drape over my midsection as she pulls me against her.

I flop down onto my ratty pile of cushions, arranging myself to that I am facing the door. Lara's breaths are slow and even but I know that she isn't asleep. I squeeze my eyes shut tightly, willing away my ever-worsening anxiety. I think of Will, telling myself that I am that much closer to bringing him home. This situation with Lara is sickening but it's too late for me to back out of it now. I have to accept the change in events and hope to the gods that my promise to bring her with me is enough to keep her from turning me over to the Enforcers.

I battle the comforting embrace of sleep for as long as I am able, continually jerking my eyes open to fixate on the door opposite. The cool breeze of the open window tickles my scarred back, brushing languidly at the reminders of what she has done to me.

Never again.

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