Pebblefall again awoke in the misty place, guilt from hurting Sandwhisker still firmly lodged in his stomach.

"What do you want with me now?" Pebblefall hissed at the black cat emerging from the mist.

This is all his fault! If only he had never visited me or Poolripple in the first place!

"Pebblefall, Sandwhisker will forgive you. You hurt him, yes, but we all have bad days." Ravenpaw paused with a dismissive flick of his tail. "But that's not why I'm here. Pebblefall, your only option is to become a medicine cat."

"But why?" Pebblefall spat. "I'll hide my feelings for Sandwhisker, I'll make sure no cat could doubt that there's nothing romantic between us! Just don't force me into being a medicine cat!"

Ravenpaw looked at him sadly. "You will never be able to hide your feelings completely. Love does not like to be hidden. What happens in a few seasons, when cats start expecting you to take a mate? What do you tell them to explain the fact that you don't have one? To explain the fact that you turned down a perfectly nice she-cat who was fond of you? They'll start to suspect."

Pebblefall hated how trapped he felt as he realized that Ravenpaw was right.

"But why couldn't I take a she-cat for a mate? Maybe I'll forget about my feelings for Sandwhisker!" Pebblefall protested.

Ravenpaw simply stared at him sadly.

Suddenly, it hit him.

"You- you don't mean that I'll never like she-cats?" When Ravenpaw didn't respond, Pebbblefall's voice rose an octave. "Are you- are you telling me that I- that I like toms?"

Ravenpaw nodded gravely, and Pebblefall's head reeled. Of course! That's why he felt the way he did for Sandwhisker. That's why he was so uncomfortable around Minnowstreak's flirting. Of course he had to do whatever it took to hide this from the Clan.

"I just-" Pebblefall paused, overcome by the emotion of his realization and what it meant. "I just love being a warrior so much!" he burst out, focusing on the less important matter.

"So did I," Ravenpaw said gravely. "But I had to leave my Clan when I was still an apprentice, which turned out to be better for me, in the end. Now I would never for all the world change my decision. You'll feel the same way, some day."

Doubtful, Pebblefall thought, but didn't voice it.

"So then I can never love Sandwhisker," Pebblefall realized with a pang. "A tom can't love another tom."

Ravenpaw's stare made him feel idiotic. "Did you forget about the feelings that caused of all this?" he asked, referring to Pebblefall's attraction to Sandwhisker.

"But a tom can't lov-"

"Of course he can," Ravenpaw interrupted with a snort. "I'll bring my mate along to meet you sometime," he added with a smile.

"Your mate?" What does his mate have to do with anything?

Ravenpaw sighed with exaggerated impatience. "My mate is a tom, Pebblefall."

Pebblefall's eyes widened. So then he and Sandwhisker could- ?

"But don't get your hopes up," Ravenpaw added, reading his expression. "There can't be a future for you and Sandwhisker. I'm sorry, but the Clan would never allow it. And since medicine cats can't take a mate anyways..."

"Oh, right." Pebblefall deflated. Of course there's no future for us, he thought bitterly, suddenly struggling to swallow around the lump in his throat. He had been foolish to hope for so much.

When he had finally composed himself enough to meet the amber-eyed gaze of his companion, he was alarmed to see that the tom was fading.

"Remember, Pebblefall. . . Be careful with your relationships."

Then Pebblefall slipped away into a dreamless sleep.

~~~~~

Pebblefall awoke to see Sandwhisker lying next to him, light seeping into the nearly-empty den. That's odd, Pebblefall thought. Usually he's up earlier than this.

"Sandwhisker." He prodded his friend's exposed flank. "Sandwhisker, it's time to get up. Sandwhisker. Sandwhisker!"

His friend rolled over and blinked up at him wearily. "I'm up, I'm up," he mumbled, eyelids drooping, as he staggered to his paws.

"Are- Are you okay?" Pebblefall asked, concerned.

"I- I- I- I'm fine," the brown tabby answered through a yawn. Pebblefall frowned but decided not to push the subject.

"I'm sorry about how I acted yesterday... It's no excuse, but I was working through some things." Pebblefall lowered his head and stared at Sandwhisker's paws, afraid to look him in his face in case his friend was angry. Sandwhisker brushed his tail lightly against Pebblefall's forehead, causing the tom to glance up instinctively.

There was nothing but forgiveness in Sandwhisker's gaze as he replied, "It's fine."

The tabby's forgiveness reminded  Pebblefall of all the reasons he cared about — loved? — Sandwhisker, and a sharp pang hit his belly at the realization of what being a medicine cat would entail. He would be busy with Poolripple, he wouldn't go on patrols, he wouldn't even sleep in the same den as Sandwhisker. Staring at his friend, he felt a deep ache open up inside of him, a longing for things never to be. Oh, my friend, I miss you already.

"There's- there's something I need to talk to you about," Pebblefall stuttered out, emotion making his voice uncertain.

Although he could probably guess what it was already, Sandwhisker was polite enough to simply answer with, "Go on."

"I- I think I've decided to become Poolripple's apprentice." Pebblefall anxiously awaited the other tom's reaction, but other than a slightly quizzical tilt of his head and a puzzled smile, Sandwhisker showed no emotion.

"That's wonderful, Pebblefall, but-" the tabby paused, noticing his friend's surprised reaction to his positivity. "I'll support whatever you want to do, Pebblefall," he explained gently. "That's what friends are for. But you didn't seem very excited about the idea two days ago...what changed?"

Pebblefall was almost too swamped with relief at his companion's lack of anger to register the question. Sandwhisker wasn't mad at him for deciding to become a medicine cat! Their friendship wouldn't be affected!

"...Pebblefall?" He snapped to attention as he realized he had momentarily become distracted.

"Sorry, I was thinking. Can we-" he glanced over at the two still-sleeping figures in the den, "maybe go somewhere else?"

"Of course," Sandwhisker answered immediately, although puzzled nonetheless.

In a secluded corner of the camp, the two friends sat together.

"Remember how Poolripple was so insistent on me becoming her apprentice?" Pebblefall asked.

Sandwhisker nodded. "Yeah?"

"Well, apparently StarClan told her that I should become a medicine cat...and they visited me, too."

Sandwhisker's eyes widened, "Woah, seriously? StarClan?" His voice rose.

"Keep it down," Pebblefall hissed, checking to make sure none of their clanmates had heard. "And yeah...StarClan," he said the name distastefully. "The cat was nice enough about it, but I don't exactly have a choice." Pebblefall made a face. "It's been decided for me."

"That's tough," Sandwhisker said sympathetically. "But maybe StarClan knows what they're doing. Maybe- maybe something good will come out of it."

Pebblefall stared at his friend, reminded of Ravenpaw's words the night before. 'It turned out to be better for me, in the end. Now I would never for all the world change my decision. You'll feel the same way, some day.'

"Yeah...maybe," Pebblefall doubtfully said aloud.

The two friends sat in silence for a moment, and Pebblefall realized that his entire life was teetering upon this moment. There was still time to turn back. He could ignore what Ravenpaw and Poolripple had said, he could ignore his feelings, and he could be happy with Sandwhisker. As friends. But deep down, Pebblefall knew that Ravenpaw was right. If he didn't take action now, the Clan would uncover his secret someday. And he couldn't allow that to happen.

"Well," Pebblefall said as he stood. "I guess...I should go tell Poolripple."

Sandwhisker nodded but made no move to follow, perhaps knowing that this was a time of his friend's life that he couldn't be a part of. With that in mind, Pebblefall walked away from his best friend and towards his new life.

Written by Annco :3
Edited by Whisper :3