|| 21 ||




12th Dec 1998


After spending some time with the guests and her colleagues, Naina returned to her room. She had caught a few more glimpses of Sameer mingling with his family and friends, but they had not interacted again.

As she put her clothes away, her gaze strayed to his jacket. Giving into the temptation, she pulled it off the hanger and slipped it on. A glance in the mirror left her smiling broadly. It was a very funny picture, his oversize tuxedo jacket draped over her sleeping attire.

Wrapped in his musky fragrance, she moved to the window. Being cocooned in his warmth. Naina absentmindedly brushed her cheek against the collar of his jacket.

It felt so natural and easy slipping back into the old ways. Meeting and chatting with him on the terraces of Dasi Mahal.

Her heart was feeling increasingly buoyant as she spent more time with him. For a long time, her heart and head had been at logger heads with each other, over the matter of her love for Sameer. But Naina was now at peace, convinced that she had loved a good man. 

Before she left the terrace, she had been trying to gather the courage to broach the topic of her miscarriage. But the thought of losing those few moments of easy camaraderie had been too depressing. She had managed to talk to Deepika about it the other evening but telling him would be much harder. She shuddered at the thought.

Sameer's earlier question 'Are you happy now?' sprung to her mind. Why had he asked that? Was the lack of true joy in her life that evident?

The pursuit of happiness is considered as one of the fundamental rights of humans in most cultures. Even where it is not defined as a right, it is still recognised to be an inherent need that keeps us going.

Naina tried to remember when she had given up on it.

As she joined the league of adults, along with many other childhood fancies, she had left the idea of finding her share of joy behind too. She had come to believe that the price of those few fleeting moments was too high. Naina worried, what if she had still not payed it in full for the time with Sameer.

* * *

July 1994



It was the last week of July and it had been raining relentlessly since dawn that day.

Naina was in an almost empty classroom scribbling away in her journal. One of the lectures had been cancelled and she was trying to make the most of it by copying some notes for the classes she had missed, when she had been home with a cold, earlier in the week.

Her classmate and good friend Priya walked over and plopped on the desk in front of her.

Opening a paper packet, she announced with relish "Naina, I have got kachoris from the canteen! Let's eat while they are still hot." Naina grimaced turning her face away "Priya, how can you eat those? They are smelling so strongly of asafoetida and oil! I am sure they are stale."

Priya rolled her eyes "Not at all stale... they just fried a new batch in front of me. Have a bite. You haven't eaten anything since morning today." As she extended a kachori, Naina shook her head "Just the smell is enough to give me a headache. Why did you bring them over?! Please go outside."

Totally ignoring her protests, Priya took a big bite of the kachori and declared sounding satisfied "You have no idea how much I have been craving these for last few days. At home, Bhabhi has been throwing up at even the hint of pungent smells. And usually Mom never indulges her daughter-in-law, but now she is so thrilled at the prospect of becoming a grandmother, that Bhabhi's every whim is being treated as a command!"

Naina looked up at her beaming "Aditi Bhabhi is pregnant?! Why didn't you tell me?" Priya whispered in a happy voice "Actually, Mom said we shouldn't share the news for few more weeks, till Bhabhi's first trimester is over!"

When Naina asked frowning "Why?" Priya shrugged "I don't know... I think it's not considered auspicious. Anyway, I know you won't tell anyone else." She continued sounding overly excited "Naina, I am so happy! Imagine, I will become an aunt and of course you too! We will play with the baby all the time."

Priya brought the packet of kachoris closer to Naina "So, it's my treat today! Have the kachoris now and later after college I will buy us Milkshakes from that new café." Naina pushed her hand away "Stop doing that. I really can't stand that smell!"

Placing the packet at the other end of her desk, Priya grumbled "Bhabhi is pregnant, what's your excuse for all this drama?!" Without waiting for a reply, she went on "I used to think that pregnancy causes lots of cravings in women, but in Bhabhi's case she has instead stopped eating so many things! All she can eat these days is potatoes."

Priya continued talking, but Naina sat frozen. Her mom's complaint from the night before was ringing in her ears – 'Naina, you haven't touched the eggplant! You are always rushing through your meals these days. And stop eating so much pickles, it will cause pimples. You have already finished all the pickle that I made using those lemons from your Sudhagadh trip!'

Naina sat through the last two lectures for the day with her heart pounding erratically. Could I be pregnant? No, it was just that one time... rather, one night. She tried to recall when she last had her periods. But, drew a blank. When did I last buy sanitary napkins? Even that was a little hard to recall in that moment.

The last couple of months had been incredibly stressful to say the least. She had gone through the motions of adhering to her routine, but rather half-heartedly at most times. More than a few times, she had been rebuked at work by her manager for committing some silly mistakes. Her mother and grandmother nagged at her for her ever-increasing forgetfulness.

Only Naina knew how she got through the days, just waiting for the night, looking forward to letting her heartache take over in the privacy of her bed. It was no surprise then that she had lost track of her periods.

As soon as she got home, she started rummaging through her cupboard, but couldn't find any sanitary napkins in there. Then recalling something vaguely, she pulled out the travel bag from under her bed. There they were! Though, she had not been expecting her periods during the trip, she had carried the pads with her, just to be on the safe side.

They have been in the bag since that trip, which means I didn't need them after... So, I am pregnant? she sat down on the bed feeling dizzy. How could she be sure? Was she supposed to notice or feel something else? What else did pregnant women experience? She just had a vague idea.

She stood in front of the mirror looking for any tell-tale signs, but her tummy was still very flat. Was it too early to start showing or had she just missed her period due to some other reason? She desperately hoped it was the later, but the gnawing fear in the pit of her stomach kept growing.

The next day she accompanied Priya home on the pretext of borrowing some books. While Priya was busy making them some tea, Naina slipped into her Aditi's room. She first offered Aditi congratulations and then enquired about her health. After a couple of minutes of idle chit-chat, she told Aditi that her newly married neighbour thought she might be pregnant but wasn't sure if she should mention anything to her mother-in-law.

Aditi was only too happy to share her newly acquired knowledge about the early the signs of pregnancy. Apart from the well-known nausea and cravings, she told Naina about the fatigue, frequent urination, and tenderness-cum-swelling of breasts that she had experienced.

The mention of the first and last symptoms confirmed Naina's suspicions. For the past few weeks, along with a growing weariness she had been experiencing a heaviness and slight discomfort in her breasts. She hadn't dwelt on it much but had thought that she would have to buy a bigger size whenever she next went shopping for bras.

She timidly thanked Aditi for her help, assuring her that she would share the information with her neighbour.

Naina spent the next couple of days, trying to ensure that she did not act in any way that would lead her family or friends to speculate on her condition. Though a challenge, it wasn't the biggest one that she found herself facing.

She battled with the dilemma of how to reach out to him and let him know about the pregnancy. She decided that she must be just about two months pregnant, which meant she had probably another couple of months before the pregnancy would be hard to hide.

Just getting the news across to him by airmail might take about two weeks and then his reply would take another two-three weeks... It would be cutting it very close. Naina refused to even dwell on what his reply would be and if he didn't choose to take responsibility and do the right thing by her.

She spent a few more restless days trying to gather the courage to approach Nanaji for his contact details. What if Nanaji wanted to know the reason for her desire to contact Sameer? Finally, she decided on a cover story, that some neighbour was moving to London for education and Naina thought it would be a good idea to share Sameer's contact details, just in case of emergency.

But the stars weren't in her favour, at all.

Before, she could meet Nanaji, Mr Chadha showed her the newspaper muttering sadly "Naina, you worked with Jaiprakashji couple of months back, right? An absolute gentleman. Such a sad loss! It says here that he was in good health and suffered from a sudden heart attack."

Naina read the obituary detailing his contributions to business and charities he supported, with tears rolling down her cheeks. Some were for the deceased man, who in the little time that she had spent with him had made a place in her heart with his kindness and generosity. She shed many more tears for the predicament life had her placed her in. The article mentioned that a Memorial service was to be held a week later by his family. Naina clung to the hope that Sameer would be present at that service. He would surely make a trip back for such an important occasion!

Naina attended the memorial, her heart gripped by anxiety and sorrow. She sat at the back with a group of ladies who were Nanaji's employees. Some furtively made enquires about Jaiprakashji's family from London attending the service revealed that only his daughter Vishakha had travelled back.

Extremely shaken by the knowledge that Sameer wasn't there, Naina loitered around the venue quaking both on the inside and outside. She tried to work up the courage to walk up to Vishakha, but her feet faltered as she couldn't figure out what exactly to share with his mother. She finally left the venue with a heavy heart thinking that maybe it would be better if she met Vishakha the following day when she wasn't surrounded by so many people.

That night, Naina stayed with her colleague Mrs Patel, an older woman in her early fifties. Mrs Patel often lived by herself, as her husband travelled extensively for his job and her son studied in another town.

As she tossed and turned in Mrs Patel's guest room that night, Naina was too consumed by her quandaries and the dread of the future to dwell too much on her physical discomfort. She attributed the sporadic ache in her lower back and abdomen to the fatigue and stress of the day. Only one fear seized her heart – How will I reach you Sameer? I really need you now...

Hours later Naina woke up with severe cramps. She stumbled out towards the kitchen to fetch some water, thinking she needed some painkillers. The pain turned debilitating and she dropped to the floor groaning, which is how her colleague found her. Noting that Naina was bleeding as well, Mrs Patel called for her doctor. On a brief examination, the doctor informed them that the patient was experiencing a miscarriage and moved her to the hospital.

A saline drip attached to her left arm pumped her with painkillers, sedatives, and other medicines to facilitate the passage of the pregnancy tissue. Lying in an impersonal hospital room surrounded by the strong smells of disinfectants and antiseptics, as an unknown doctor and nurse attended to her, Naina tried to mentally dissociate with the event. But it was an impossible endeavour.

For nineteen years, whenever in pain, Naina had yearned for her mother to be by her side. But that night, her heart only screamed for Sameer.

The next day, after her discharge, Mrs Patel brought Naina back home. Naina called Vimla and asked her to convey to her mother that she had to stay back in Ahmedabad for another night.

Before this incidence, Naina and Mrs Patel had been just colleagues, who though friendly hadn't been close. But Mrs Patel had been the one to wipe her brow and hold her hand when Naina was at her most vulnerable.

After losing the baby Naina felt like her last tangible connection to Sameer had been lost too. She returned to Ahmedabad a mere shadow of herself. Over the next couple of weeks, every time her mother or grandmother expressed any concern about her lacklustre look, she pleaded headaches.

Rama scolded her daughter about her recently adopted unhealthy habit of binging on pickles and started ensuring that she ate a more balanced diet. Naina anyway couldn't stand even the name of pickles anymore!

Slowly her body regained its strength, but the scars on her psyche did not fade.

A shroud of anxiety surrounded Naina at work too. Though Mrs Patel had silently supported Naina through the ordeal, without any inquisition, Naina hadn't missed the look of disapproval in her eyes. The change in Mrs Patel's demeanour over the coming weeks was not radical, but it was not unnoticeable either. Every time Naina saw Mrs Patel in any hushed conversations with other colleagues, her heart would start palpitating in trepidation. Though none of her other colleagues or her manager ever made any comments, Naina started dreading the possibility of people gossiping about her lost virtue.

One day as she yet again dispiritedly made some excuse about the pressure at work being the cause of her fatigue, her Nani urged her "Beta, why don't you take a break from work for some time now? Thanks to that scholarship besotted by Maheshwariji, you don't really need the money from the job. Concentrate on your studies for the rest of the year." Naina recalled Nanaji advising her something on similar lines too. Maybe it made sense.

Few days later she resigned from her part-time job stating the increasing pressure on the education front from both her courses as the reason. Mr Chadha was very understanding and asked her to approach them the following year. But wanting to avoid the fear of speculation, Naina never went back to that organisation.

Not wanting to be on her own, since that's when she was more prone to tears, she partnered with Priya to form a study group of two. Initially they took turns studying at each other's homes. But as Aditi's belly started growing, Naina's hands would unknowingly travel to her own flat tummy and leave her reeling from her loss afresh. She persuaded Priya to come over to her home for their study sessions.

On one hand Rama and Malati were pleased to see Naina with her head buried in her books wanting her to excel in her final year, but were also slightly unnerved by her withdrawal from all the activities she had enjoyed before.

For the first time ever, the girls in the neighbourhood had to literally drag her to the last night of the Navratri celebrations that year when Naina made various excuses for the first eight nights. To her surprise the music and dance did distract her from her heartache, even if it was for just a little while.

The rangoli outside their door that Diwali was a simple and small pattern of dots and dashes, instead of the big elaborate designs of the previous years. As Naina stood with her neighbours holding some sparklers in her hands, her heart was the mournfully humming the song - Lakhon taare aasman mein ek magar dhoonde na mila, Dekh ke duniya ki Diwali dil mera chup-chap jala.

New Year's Eve arrived and 1995 began, but Naina knew that 1994 would forever haunt her.

As Priya excitedly gushed about Valentine's Day and sighed daydreaming about her future love life, Naina made a staunch resolution to never repeat the mistake of falling in love.

One day towards the end of February, Priya happily brought sweets to college announcing that she had become an aunt as Aditi had delivered a baby girl. Naina offered her congratulation with all the enthusiasm that she could muster and then left the college early that day.

She spent the afternoon sobbing under a banyan tree in the empty courtyard of a Shiva temple. Her heart and head asked the Mahadev many questions, none of which were answered by Him. That was the last time Naina visited a temple of her own accord. In the coming years, visits to any places of worship were either as a result of her mother and grandmother's nagging or as part of her job requirements. When unavoidable she entered the inner sanctum and stood with folded hands, but she did not speak to Him again.

The final exams for both her courses were held towards the beginning of the summer. While almost all students were thrilled with the end of the exams, Naina lost the one thing that had been proving to be a much-needed distraction.

The summer of 1995 was the worst of her life. She watched the dates change with a quivering heart. The end of May marked the first anniversary of Sameer's unexpected arrival in her life, and his abrupt exit too. It felt like, this year too, that month took with it another part of her. Unknowingly her heart conferred on the month the title of – May - the Month of Mourning.

Naina cleared both the courses with flying colours. As her mother happily distributed sweets amongst their neighbours with much pride, Naina felt a flicker of joy after a long time. When she stood in front of the photos of her father and grandfather seeking their blessings, a part of her bowed in gratitude to Sameer's Nanaji too. The last year would have been much more difficult for her had it not been for the financial support he had provided. Nanaji, I would have definitely brought you sweets if you were still with us. I am sure you would have been pleased with my exam results! 

Sometimes Naina pondered on how ironic it was, that the Maheshwari men were responsible for both trying to steady her boat and for the choppy waters she found herself struggling to stay afloat in.

Javed Akhtar's lines deeply resonated with the state of her mind -

Sab hawayein le gaya mere samandar ki koi,
Aur mujhko ek kashti baadbaani de gaya

Soon after, Naina started her new job with Royal Tours. Working with a new set of colleagues was both unsettling and comforting. Learning a lot of new dynamics and ways of working brought her some anxiety, but not having to worry about Mrs Patel spilling her beans helped her breathe easier.

August was again filled with agony as it was impossible to keep the memories of her miscarriage at bay. On that particular date, she ended up with a panic attack on the way back from work. The doctor that she ended up seeing that day tried in vain to get her to open-up about her anxieties. Finally, he just shared some tips on how to deal with the onset of any such attacks in the future –to take deep breaths while counting in her head till the panic passed away, meditate as possible, avoid places or events that could trigger the anxiety to start with, and so on.

Over the next few years, Naina developed her own strategy for dealing with the pain. She made sure that at certain times of the year she was all by herself. On these days, she did not attempt to hold in her agony. She wailed and whimpered as much as she needed to. The rest of the time, she rationed her tears and refused to acknowledge the torment bubbling in her veins.

Her new colleagues at Royal Tours never got to see the carefree Naina with twinkling eyes and easy laughter. Instead, they got used to seeing a polite reserved girl who was extremely focused on her work. This was never considered as an issue by her employer as she always received glowing feedback from the clients for all tours conducted.

About a year and half back Madhu joined the office. With her chirpy and friendly persistent personality, she managed to break through some of the invisible walls Naina had built around herself. Maybe, she reminded Naina of the Naina-Before-Sameer version of herself. Slowly a warm friendship had blossomed between the girls.

Naina started indulging in some of the simple pleasures of everyday life. She infrequently allowed Madhu to drag her to chaat stalls, shopping for trinkets and movies. Of course, Naina never shared anything about the events of the past that had shaped her, but Madhu understood the present-day challenges in Naina's life.

* * *

13th Dec 1998



Sameer woke up as his alarm set for 8 am went off. Turning it off, he instinctively nuzzled back into his pillow for those precious five more minutes of lazing. But only till it dawned on him where he was, and that she was somewhere outside his room but within the four walls of Dasi Mahal.

As he rushed through his start of a day routine, he was musing on their conversation of the previous night.

Though she was starting to open up, he had an uneasy feeling that there was still something holding her back. He hadn't missed how she ensured that the conversation had been centred on him. She hardly spoke about herself, sharing only the bare minimum when he probed.

He chuckled to himself remembering her lecture about the evils of drinking, and then smiled with growing warmth at the thought of how much she seemed to care.

* * *

Rohan and Kabir were already seated at one of the tables. Kabir spoke cheerfully as Sameer joined him "Good morning! Hope you slept much better last night and are all set for the upcoming battle!"

When Sameer nodded "Absolutely.", Rohan beamed pushing a sheet of paper "Perfect! Let's get down to business and finalise our strategy for the day. We have to completely destroy the opponents today!"

Soon more men joined their table and a passionate discussion ensued.

* * *

Radhika's staff had been running around for the last couple of hours ensuring all her instructions were followed. A day filled with different activities of interest for all the guests had seemed like a perfect plan on paper, but even Radhika was starting to question the wisdom behind her plan now!

Jyoti approached her with an update "The t-shirts and caps have been sorted and setup." Radhika nodded and asked, "What about the drinks for the players?" Jyoti confirmed "Those are setup. Vibha and Naina are now organizing the drinks and snacks for the spectators." After exchanging a few more words, Jyoti went to convey a message for other colleague.

Naina wiped the sweat off her forehead with her the ends of her red saree, as she stepped back looking at the trollies loaded with drinks and snacks in satisfaction. A glance at her watch showed that the guests would soon start converging to the play area.

Some of the players were already warming up at the other end. She craned her neck trying to catch glimpse of Sameer. Dressed in grey sweats and t-shirt, with his back towards her, he was practising his balling at that moment. Rohan held the bat while some other men were practising their fielding skills.

A board hung to one side announcing the 'Cricket Match - England vs India (108 balls)'. Considering a proper one-day match was out of question, someone had decided that 18 overs equating to 108 balls would be a propitious number to play on this auspicious occasion. The players represented the country of their residence. The overseas guests were all clubbed under 'England' as only two teams could be represented! The organisers had decided on this team structure instead of the more conventional 'Groom vs Bride' with the objective to promote the socializing of guests from both the sides.

As the clock struck 10 am, Radhika stepped to the front and warmly welcomed the players and guests. The players were pointed in the direction of the table offering t-shirts and caps with the team name printed across the front. Some permanent markers were available for them to write their name across the back.

Despite all efforts to the contrary, Naina found herself peaking at him from the corner of her eye as Sameer removed his grey t-shirt, scribbled his name across a white one and slipped it on. She might have enjoyed the sight of his broad shoulders in the vest for a bit longer had she not noted that Ishita was checking him out too. Naina fumed on the inside – What a shameless girl! Ogling at a guy while he is changing...

And what's wrong with him? Couldn't he first write his name before removing the first t-shirt?! In fact, why couldn't he just use the temporary changing room that Radhika made us install?! Naina conveniently overlooked the fact that all the other players had done exactly what Sameer had done. Or maybe, she just didn't notice any of them at all!

Her ire soon reached new heights, when not satisfied with just eying him, Ishita sauntered over to Sameer. She was dressed in blue denim shorts, which displayed her shapely legs to their best advantage. Thrusting out her hand, she exclaimed "Best of luck Sammy! I am so super excited to watch you play!" Sameer smiled "Thanks Ishita, let's hope we win."

After another thirty seconds of conversation, Sameer casually strolled over to where Naina was standing. Grabbing a bottle of water from the table, he asked her cheekily "So, who will you be cheering for today?" To his surprise, she had replied grumpily "Of course for team 'India'! I don't change my loyalties so easily."

He replied pretending to be in pain "Ouch... that really hurt! And here I was dreaming of my very own cheering squad of a lady-in-red." Narrowing her eyes, Naina replied with a thinking expression "First of all, let me remind you that you are about to play cricket and not football! So, there are no cheerleaders. But I am sure, if you insist, there are many other girls here who will happily wave their hands or broomsticks for you... or whatever it is that a cheering squad does!"

Sameer chuckled at her response and tutted "So, you really will be supporting my enemy?" She retorted "Your enemy?? That's strange... I thought you're intrinsically fond of everything starting with an 'I'!"

While Sameer tried to make some sense of this declaration that she had made on his behalf, Rohan and Oliver walked over. Rohan patted Sameer's shoulder and remarked sounding excited "Come on bro, let's go show them what team 'England' is made of!" Oliver laughed good-naturedly and winked at Naina "Team 'England' which is made of Indians and Irish! Wish us luck Naina."

Smiling warmly at Oliver, Naina immediately wished him luck. As Rohan pulled him away, Sameer was haplessly wondering why she had chosen to happily bestow Oliver with good luck, but not him.

Rohan was the Caption of team 'England', while team 'India' was led by a six feet tall young man from Delhi named Monty. The toss was won by the Indian team which elected to bat.

As Sameer was stationed on the boundary far from her, Naina had to make do with glimpses of him whenever he balled. When he took a couple of wickets Naina found herself torn between her loyalty for her country and her admiration for the baller. She had to curtail her enthusiasm for Sameer's skills and feign disappoint as the Indian team lost some key wickets.

Every now and then, Sameer would glance in her direction and wonder – What exactly changed between last night and this morning? She seemed perfectly fine on the terrace yesterday, what's the reason for this grouchy behaviour now? She seems to be even more temperamental than the bloody British weather!

Other than ensuring that the refreshment trollies were restocked and any occasional requests from the guests, Naina and her colleagues were free to enjoy the match.

Thanks to Monty's batting, which did not have much finesse but surely had a lot of hot-headed power, team 'India' scored a very respectable 124 by the end of their innings.

After a small drinks break, the opening batsmen for 'England' headed to the ground. Naina wondered at which position would Sameer play as Rohan and Kabir took their places near the make-shift pitch. The opening duo seemed to be going strong, till Rohan was caught behind the wicket. The next batsman was dismissed quickly too.

Naina interest in the game was drastically revived as Sameer walked towards the crease.

Everything from the way he stretched his neck to tapping his bat on the ground, Naina decided was screaming champion! But she wrung the ends of her saree pallu uneasily, noting that he had waved away the helmet offered by the batsman who was returning to the stands.

As Sameer cast a look round the ground taking in the placement of the fielders, his eyes paused on the women in red anxiously gazing at him. For a moment, his eyes in vain lingered on her to see if she would now make any show of support. Taking a deep breath, he focussed his attention on the game.

His every stroke, irrespective of whether it earned him any runs or not, enthralled her. For once there was no need to sneak glances at him. She watched this avatar of him unabashedly.

As he hit another boundary, Naina clapped exuberantly, eyes gleaming and her heart overflowing with pride yet again.

Her claim about unchanging loyalties lay forgotten, as she desperately waited for the umpire to refute a claim for LBW against Sameer. Her relief was palpable when he was declared 'Not Out', but so was her irritation as Ishita along with some other girls screamed his name again and again.

Naina had to draw deep on her inner strength and smile as she fulfilled a request from an older woman for extra sugar for her tea. The thought of losing a couple of minutes of watching him, which might in turn leave her with some precious memories to cherish later, left her with a queasy feeling. As much as she tried to focus on making the most of the present, the fear of the inevitable future loomed like a dark cloud at the back of her mind.

Though just a game between family and friends, the energy amongst all present on that ground was sizzling! The spectators were ardently cheering for their team for the day, while the players passionately tried to ensure that their team would emerge victorious at the end.

Naina was squinting slightly as the sun was shining brightly. There were five overs left to be bowled, and team 'England' needed to score thirty-five runs to win the game.

Monty started balling the fourteenth over. The first ball was a bouncer and Sameer had to duck to avoid getting hit. The audience let out a sigh of relief but was a little premature. The next ball hit Sameer on his forehead. It was more a graze than a full-on hit, but it was enough to have him stumble and sit down with a dazed expression.

As some of the guests from the audience rushed towards him, Naina sat frozen in her spot. The memory of his riding accident immediately sprung to her mind. Not again! Her mind was screaming.

Fighting the wave of terror, she counted to five in her mind and then sprung into action. Maybe her quick response also had something to do with Ishita sitting next to Sameer and fusing over him. Grabbing the first-aid kit stashed under one of the tables, Naina sprinted towards him.

Rohan and Kabir were asking Sameer some pointed questions to establish the extent of his injury and pain when she reached there.

Deepika was kneeling at his one side offering him water, while Ishita was repeatedly cooing "Oh Sammy.... That must be hurting so much. You need to rest. I am not going to let you lift a finger for the rest of the day!" Despite the chaos, Naina thought irritated, Who is she to allow or not allow him to do anything?!

Naina brusquely addressed Ishita "Excuse me, but I think it will be better if you step back a bit and let him breathe." When taken aback Ishita started at her muttering "What do you mean?!", Naina gathered her wits and replied more cordially "I am trained to administer first-aid, so please let me check on him."

As Ishita grudgingly stepped away from Sameer, Naina immediately crouched next to him. The wound didn't seem deep, but there was a bit of bruising and a bump had appeared. Naina paled and her hands shook slightly as she tried to open the first-aid box.

Recalling how scared she had been for him on the two occasions in the past, Sameer tried to assure her in a calm voice "Naina, I am okay. It's just a cricket ball. I haven't fallen off a horse, nor am I about down in the pool!"

As the people around them were stupefied by this out of context reference to horses and drowning, Deepika responded "Bhai, what are you talking about? You are playing cricket not polo!" She turned to Naina, "Can you check the injury quickly? Do you think he is disoriented?"

Naina focused on the task at hand and started inspecting his cut and bump. As she cleaned the wound with Dettol, her face scrunched in distaste, Naina kept blowing on the wound in anticipation of the sting. 

Minor injuries like this weren't new for him and Sameer wasn't too bothered about it. But a part of him was taking pleasure in seeing Naina so worked up and worried for him. Something else that hasn't changed about her, he noted with gratification.

As she leaned closer to clean the wound, he whispered "Maybe this wouldn't have happened if someone had wished me good luck earlier today." Some guilt started colouring her, before she realised that he was smirking.

Applying the antiseptic ointment, Naina shared a piece of her mind "You needed a helmet to avoid this injury! It could have been much worse. Count yourself lucky that the ball hit your forehead and not your eye. Can you even imagine the damage it could have done?"

Sameer mumbled "Have you seen the quality of those helmets? As good as wearing nothing..." She retorted "But they are still better than not wearing anything!"

Naina asked Deepika to hold some cotton in place. As she stuck some plasters on his forehead, she continued rambling "You are here for your brother's wedding! How can you be so careless Sameer?"

He replied "Hey, it's just a small nick. The swelling will subside in a few hours. Nothing to worry about." He added trying to make light of it "And considering Rohan is the groom, all eyes will be on him. So, no harm done!" She shook her head dismissively "There will be a big bruise on your face in all the photos!"

Deepika chuckled "Naina, in fact that will be very much in line with what is expected of Bhai. He has bandages in most of our childhood photos!" Naina thought annoyed, Why is Deepika endorsing his carelessness?! Like brother like sister... And what if the injury isn't as minor as it appears??

Kabir had been observing the tender care being bestowed on his friend accompanied by a not-so-tender telling off, with a degree confusion. He asked Sameer as Naina started packing the first-aid kit "You ready to head back bro?"

As Sameer gave him a thumbs-up and started picking his bat, Naina turned to Kabir sounding flustered "He can't go back! He has just had a lucky escape. Just because he says so doesn't mean he is actually fine! He could easily have a concussion, and it will only get worse if he heads out to play now."

Kabir stood flabbergasted, not sure how to react. Naina's seemingly authoritarian behaviour had started drawing baffled looks from everyone standing around.

Radhika had been pleased with Naina to see her stepping up to offer first-aid to start with, but she bristled seeing Naina's recent unprofessional tirade. She also felt chagrined by the annoyed look on Vishakha's face, who didn't seem pleased with Naina's tone either.

Radhika addressed Naina sharply "Naina, I think that's enough of help from you! Sameer is an adult and can decide for himself if he is up for continuing with the game or not. Do I need to remind you where we are?! Head back inside now and check on the arrangements for the afternoon."

The rebuke from Radhika drained the colour off Naina's face. It suddenly hit her that she had crossed the line with a customer. Naina muttered an apology "Sorry, I didn't mean to offend anyone. I was just worried for...", gulping the rest of the words as tears threatened to make their way, she stood up to leave.

Seething on the inside, Sameer helplessly watched Naina being told off by Radhika. His heart staggered at the look of embarrassment fleeting across her features, her glistening downcast eyes, and her extra tight hold on the first-aid kit. How dare she talk to Naina like this?! And that too in front of so many people!

It was the audience that kept him from retaliating at Radhika and causing a scene in that moment. But he couldn't bear to watch her walk away hanging her head in humiliation, all because she had been worried for him.

As soon as he stood up, Sameer raised his hand to his head muttering "Shit man... I feel dizzy." Vishakha rushed forward "Sameer! Beta, are you okay? Rohan, pull a chair for him here!" As Deepika and the others started fussing over him, Naina stopped and turned to looked at him with an ashen face.

Sameer spoke "I think she is right. I shouldn't go back on the field. My head is starting to hurt. Rohan declare me retired injured and carry on. If you send Ollie in now, he and Kabir should be able to win the match for us."

Vishakha hushed him "Forget about winning that stupid match!  First come inside and lie down."  Turning to Radhika, she remarked sounding annoyed "I hope while planning this match you have also planned to keep a doctor on hand for any injuries like this!"

Radhika gulped nervously "Ma'am, there's no doctor here... but I will call for the one from the main palace hotel." Vishakha announced in a scathing tone "And long will that take? An hour? God knows what sort of irresponsible planning this is!"

A red-faced Radhika stood silently knowing that antagonising Mrs Somani any further would be detrimental to the success of the whole event. She mumbled something about sending for the doctor right away.

Seeing that his charade was blowing out of proportion, Sameer muttered to his mother "Mom, let's not rush in calling for the doctor. I am sure, just a bit of rest will be enough. I don't feel that bad."

Vishakha's demeanour softened a bit hearing her son's assurance. She addressed Radhika dismissively "Send Naina inside to check on him. At least she seems to know of how to seriously handle this situation!"

The brides mother Neeta hadn't been present on the ground earlier but hearing about the accident she rushed outside too. After checking with Sameer, she assured Vishakha that there was a doctor amongst their side of the guests, and she would check on Sameer right away.

Naina followed Sameer and his little entourage of females, who were either closest to Sameer or considered themselves close to him. Sameer was ushered to the closest lounge where everyone set out to make him comfortable.

He huffed on the inside, as Neeta pointed out the comfiest sofa and Ishita adjusted the pillows at a certain angle asking him to lie down. Mindful of not crossing any limits again, Naina stood to one side. But her displeasure watching Ishita's fussing over Sameer reflected on her face.

Noting Naina's expressions and making deductions of her own, Vishakha spoke "Ishita, beta I don't think you are doing it right. Naina, come here and make sure he is okay and comfortable." As Naina stepped forward feeling happier, Vishakha worriedly asked "Do you think he has a concussion?"

Trying to recall everything she had learnt during her half-a-day training, Naina asked him a few questions and changing the angle of the pillow instructed him "Stay upright and don't fall asleep. It's important to stay conscious after a concussion. And let us know if you feel like you are going to throw up." Sameer scowled thinking, Why cant they decide if I should lay down or stay upright? Plus, how does it even matter when I perfectly fine!

Winking at her surreptitiously, Sameer tried to tell her "Naina, I am really okay." But she replied frowning, "Let's wait for the doctor to make that diagnosis! And what's wrong with your eyes? Are you not able to close both at the same time?" Sameer leaned back on the sofa, thinking frustrated, What the hell is the doctor going to do when there is nothing wrong with me?! And why can't she understand my simple signals???

Luckily, before Vishakha could start questioning the functioning of his eyes, the doctor arrived. Smiling apologetically, she muttered "Sorry, I was in the toilet. I think the Medu Vadas this morning had too much soda in them..." Sameer rolled his eyes thinking, Too much information... While the other ladies tutted sympathetically.

After a prompt examination, the doctor declared him absolutely fine! Then looking at all the women anxiously surrounding him, she deemed it in her self-interest to prescribe him an aspirin for the headache and an afternoon of 'take-it-easy'.

Someone was sent to fetch an aspirin from their room. With nothing else to do, the doctor spent few minutes convincing Vishakha that her son was in no danger at all. Hearing Vishakha's account of how Naina's extraordinary quick-thinking skills had ensured that her injured son did not immediately continue with the match, the doctor nodded approvingly and praised Naina for the perfectly applied plaster.

As everyone started to return to their earlier tasks or positions, Ishita announced that she would keep Sammy company in the lounge. The prospect of spending time alone with her being far too much for him to handle, Sameer insisted that he was well enough to at least watch the reminder of the match.

While heading outside, he tugged on Naina arm at the first chance and hissed "Which part of, I am REALLY okay, do you not understand?" As she looked at him startled, he added "I was just pretending!"

Naina muttered confused "Pretending? What?" He rolled his eyes "Pretending to feel dizzy and that headache..." Her eyes grew wide "You mean, there is nothing wrong with you? All of this was just an act?"

He muttered "Well, the bump on my head is obviously real. But the rest wasn't." She blinked uncomprehendingly "But, why?"

He flushed slightly "Well, seeing how Radhika was getting on your case, I had to do something to justify your outburst out there..."

Deepika shouted from ahead "Bhai, here's a spot is in the shade with a good view." As he grimaced and started to head in Deepika's direction, Naina called out "Sameer, thank you." He nodded smiling and mouthed a 'You are welcome!'

Even before Sameer got to his seat, the match was over and team 'India' emerged the victors. Team England's batting order had not fared very well after Sameer's exit. They cribbed about Monty's aggressive balling style and the poor quality of the grass.

Monty ensured that his teammates carried him on their shoulders for about forty seconds, which were of course photographed and documented for posterity.

Ishita announced to everyone, who would listen, that their team would have surely won had Sammy not been forced to retire during the crucial part of the game!

The elders kept emphasizing to the sullen youngsters that it was meant to be just a friendly fun game and they were all one big happy family.

All this while, Naina moved around with a slight smile fluttering at the corner of her lips and her heart thumping jubilantly, He sacrificed the match just for me!

He couldn't allow Radhika to bully me! Naina's pride in those moments was no less than had Sameer unsheathed a sword to defend her honour against an enemy battalion.

* * *


(This turned out to be a much longer update than I had expected! Hope you enjoyed it.

Okay, one genuine question, did this part work in terms of flow and tone/mood overall? I am personally not sure if it would have worked better had I shared it as two separate updates, one for the past and another covering the present. Would appreciate your feedback for future reference.

Hope you all are doing well. The lockdown restrictions are easing in most parts of the world, but please be responsible and stay safe.

Please note I am going to be busy with some online training/learning for a bit, so will share updates every two weeks for the next month or so.

Below are few lines of Faiz Ahmed Faiz's gazal immortalised by the legendary Noor Jehan. For some reason I was listening to it on a loop for the last few days and felt like sharing 😊

Lots of love, May)


Ab bhi dilkash hai tera husn, magar kya keeje?

Aur bhi dukh hai zamaane mein muhabbat ke siwaa,

Raahatein aur bhi hain vasl ki raahat ke siwaa

Mujh se pehli si muhabbat mere mehboob na maang,

Mujh se pehli si muhabbat mere mehboob na maang...

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