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Alastor

I'm not sure how long I sat there holding her.

My legs had gone numb and her skin had grown cold.

No matter how long I waited, her eyes remained open and lifeless, growing dull and grey.

A large part of me was in denial. She couldn't be dead. I didn't kill her.

No, I didn't.

I didn't... I wouldn't... why won't she wake up...

It wasn't until I could hear voices outside my house that I snapped out of my daze, my head turning to the front door. I could see flashlights shining outside and through my windows.

My eyes widened and I looked back to Juliette.

Pulling her close to me, I stumbled slightly as I tried to push up off the floor.

"Don't worry...don't worry, my dear, I won't let them touch you..."

I mumbled to her, holding onto the stair banister as the blood rushed back to my legs, making them wobble.

The voices were close, and I knew my door would be knocked down within the next few minutes.

So, I went to the back door, cradling my love in my arms as if she were simply sleeping.

I left a trail of blood in my passing, causing my home to look like a crime scene. In a way, it was.

Once I'd stumbled out of the house, I didn't look back, instead heading straight into the forest and hoping that they wouldn't catch up to me.

Distantly, I heard the sounds of police dogs.

Ah, so they anticipated I'd run. That makes sense, but annoyed me nonetheless.

The harder my blood pumped through my veins, the faster my legs ran.

It was dark, and cold, and I couldn't see properly where I was going but I didn't care.

I need to protect her. I need to escape. Once we're alone, everything will be better. Back to the way it was.

We'll read by the fire and make dinner together.

I'll pick her up at the diner, and she'll make my coffee the way she always does. Perfectly.

Harder, my feet slammed harder into the snowy ground and my breath came in bursts, my lungs burning.

I was completely turned around, and I had no idea where I was. Stopping, I looked around aimlessly for any indicator of where I was.

I'd been running for who knows how long, trying to put distance between me and those hunting dogs.

Finally, my eyes landed on a familiar structure. It was difficult to tell, since it was covered in snow, but I was almost positive I could see the entrance to the place Juliette took me when she confessed her feelings for me.

I stared for a moment, wondering if that would be a good place to go. Then, I heard the distant sounds of barking once more, and that alone made my decision for me, driving me forward.

I pushed through the wall of snow-covered ivy leaves, falling through just as I thought I would.

My breaths still came ragged, and I clumsily stumbled into the hidden spot. Everything was either covered in snow, or dull and dead from the cold of the season.

It was like everything had gone quiet. There was a moment of calm in the chaos I'd caused, and my steps slowed down.

Looking out at the slowly trickling waterfall, and the calm pond that was partially frozen, I felt the backs of my eyes burn and a knot formed in my throat.

My eyes cast down at the beautiful face of my doe, her skin pale and bloodless. During the journey, all the motion of me running had caused her eyes to close, and she truly looked as if she were simply asleep.

My lip trembled and my vision blurred as I fell to my knees, holding her close to me, hardly able to hold myself up as my body hunched over and I hugged her.

Her lack of response, arms hanging limply, made a hollow feeling form in my chest.

Gently, I laid her in a patch of snow, giving her a soft place to rest.

I carefully fixed her hair, her dress, and laid her hands on her stomach, holding them for a moment as I gazed at her beauty for the last time.

"I am sorry, my love... please forgive me..."

Leaning down, I kissed her knuckles, my eyes screwing shut as I grit my teeth and fought back more tears.

"Please..."

If there is a god... and a heaven or hell, I can only pray she goes to heaven. She is such a kind spirit, and a good person.

Nothing like me.

I warned her.

I told her I was wicked.

The peace was suddenly interrupted by the sound of the dogs and voices growing closer. I looked towards the entrance to our sanctuary, worried.

This is her place. I can't let them find us here.

Placing one last kiss against her knuckles I laid her hands neatly across her stomach, standing up.

"I have to go, now, darling... I'm sorry I never said it before now, but I love you... I've always loved you... please, travel safely..."

Then, as much as it hurt, I turned and left her.

My feet pounded into the snow once more as I emerged from the Ivy wall and started to run in the opposite direction.

The dogs were so close, and I could hear voices shouting directions. No doubt tracking my steps.

Though, it didn't take long for my stamina to grow thin. The cold air made it feel like I couldn't get enough into my lungs, and the air I did manage to suck down burned.

I started to cough, my chest feeling as if it were on fire. I clutched it and felt warm blood bubble up my throat.

"Fuck..."

I could no longer run, but I kept moving.

There was a slight ringing in my ears, and my vision was growing blurry. The burning slowly dwindled into a numb sensation that was spreading through my limbs and making it hard to walk.

I couldn't tell where or how far away the police were. Everything was moving slowly, and I felt heavy.

Nothing hurt any longer, surprisingly, but I still couldn't move any faster than a slow trudge.

What sounded like snarling was all around me, and I could feel something pulling at my hands and legs, making me stumble slightly.

I looked down and there was a dog by my side, biting and tugging at my hand. The sound of growling was muffled, the ringing in my ears too loud to make out anything else.

It seems they caught up to me.

Oh well.

Slowly, a smile spread across my face and I started to laugh, coughing up a bit of blood before my laughter turned near maniacal in nature.

It's not like it matters.

I'm going to burn in hell either way, no matter if I die now or later in life.

What's the point of living anyway, if my doe is not with me?

Those were my last thoughts before a loud noise rang through the air, and I felt a quick, sharp pain in my head.

Then the world went black, and I was falling.

**

If the video didn't embed properly at the beginning, the song I want you all to listen to is called "A Hazy Shade of Winter".

It's by Sarah Cothran. I love her music sm she has such a pretty voice.

I decided that this song works perfectly for not only this chapter, but also as Juliette's theme.