I didn't notice Sarah and Danny join Sammy and me on the L couch.

"Earth to Em," Sarah's voice was tart as a lemon; clearly, my preoccupation had been longer than I realized.

"Sorry, study-time?" I asked as I shook the funk from my mind.

"Yeah, patio- I can't focus with this gremlin playing video games." Sarah tussled Sammy's hair as she walked by.

"You shouldn't call Danny a gremlin; you just met him." Sammy didn't bother to peel his eyes from the screen as he spoke.

"I love this kid," Danny added as he picked up a controller.

I saw a smile spread across Sammy's face, causing my heart to skip a beat. Danny has Sammy's approval.

We spread our books across the patio table and popped open the umbrella. It was going to be a hot day, and we both were eager to get through studying so we could have fun in the pool.

"Okay," Sarah eagerly started. It was surprising how orderly Sarah was as we studied. Usually, I had to bribe her to focus. "Where should we start?"

"Well, I feel like you're solid in English, history, and Spanish. So, we should focus on math and science." I pushed and pulled the books to bring chemistry and algebra to the front.

"Si, senorita," Sarah agreed. "But that's not what I was talking about." The study train instantly derailed. "Danny is hot, like rock-star hot."

"Yeah, I told you he was cute." I hoped my acknowledgment would appease her, but knew it wouldn't.

"Yeah, but you were all like nonchalant hot, not like hit the pause button and let this sink in hot."

"Well, wait until you see Conner," I flushed when I realized what I had said.

"Wait, you have two hot guys defending your honor now?" Sarah sat back, "all I have is a sarcastic seven-year-old."

"Sarah, I hate to break this to you, but your sarcastic seven-year-old is totally Team-Em."

"He is; I have no one." She threw her hands up in mock despair.

"That's not true; you have me. And besides, it was a fierce chick that defended my honor."

"Baller move. So, about that, am I being replaced?"

"No, never, but I think we should hang with Kel this summer. You two would love each other."

"I like her style." Sarah's eyes fell to her nails.

I snapped my fingers in front of Sarah's sunglasses and pointed to her math book. With a heavy sigh, Sarah begrudgingly began her math problems. She impressed me with her focus. We had gotten through all the practice problems and started on chemistry when Conner showed.

"Hey," he shyly spoke as he turned the corner of the house to the back patio.

My eyes met his, and I immediately forgot how to breathe.

"Holy shit," Sarah whispered beside me. "I'd like to study chemistry with him."

I kicked her under the table resulting in a loud "ow."

"Hey, Conner." I tried to sound relaxed as I rose to greet him, but my legs got caught in the patio chair as I stood. I stumbled toward the ground before two firm hands plucked me from my freefall and shifted me upright. "Sorry," I mumbled, my face burning with embarrassment.

"No worries." He flashed a second shy smile as Sarah gracefully stood.

"I'm Sarah, and you are boiling." Leave it to Sarah, to be completely honest.

"Uh, hey," Conner flashed me a scared look before adding, "nice to meet you." But it came out as more of a question.

Sarah just smiled, enjoying the discomfort she caused.

"Hey," Danny called as he joined us from the sliding door.

My gaze fell on his hand, clutched by Sammy as though they had been lifelong friends. My heart swirled with my two favorite men connecting. Someone somewhere was putting puzzle pieces together.

"Hey," Conner's shoulders loosened when he saw Danny. "Who's your friend?"

"This is Sammy." I couldn't help but smile at how cute Sammy was as I introduced him.

He was curious about Conner, but didn't seem to gravitate toward him like he did to Danny. Sammy threw his arms around me when they joined the circle and rested his head on my waist. He had gotten taller in the last year. It wouldn't be long before we were the same height, or worse, he was taller than me.

"Despite appearances, he's my little brother," Sarah added in a teasing tone that incited Sammy to stick his tongue out at her.

"Do I have two people moving in on my best friend now?" Conner smiled.

Without missing a beat, Danny retorted, "Conner, was that a joke?"

Conner shot an annoyed look at Danny.

"It's okay handsome," Sarah clapped a hand down on one of Conner's broad shoulders, "I'll laugh at any jokes you have."

Conner gave me another 'help me look,' so I offered him a tour.

"It's not much, and it's pretty lonely." I semi-joked as I led him through the living room into my room. "Bathroom's through there if you want to change."

"Should I be concerned about taking my shirt off around your friend? She seems..." he broke off, searching for a way to not sound offensive.

"She's more bark than bite," I said, but Conner's skeptical look proved that I didn't convince him.

Danny was back in the living room, watching Sammy play video games.

"Did he beat you too much?" I asked as I tucked in next to him.

"He crushed me," Danny sheepishly admitted.

"Prepare to die!" Sammy used the voice he had perfected while watching Inigo Montoya avenge his father.

One of Danny's long arms snaked around me. "You good?" He quietly prodded.

"Yeah, am I a bad person? I mean, I got dumped last night. I should be a mess." Thoughts of being crumpled in a ball of tears, snot, and tissues swirled in my head. I had been with Jacob for five years. Instead of mourning, I was throwing a pool party.

"I don't know you very well, but probably." He gave my side a pinch with his free hand before being interrupted by swim shorts covering his face. "Nice. Is that the skill of a baseball star?"

"You played baseball?" Sammy chirped to Conner from the floor, still without moving his eyes from the TV.

"Yeah, I played for Deering."

"Jacob played baseball. I'm allowed to hate him now." Sammy spoke so casually that I had to stifle a laugh; Danny was less successful.

"We don't hate Jacob," I finally added, a little too late.

"We just don't have to pretend to like him anymore," Sarah chimed as she came in with her chemistry book in her hands. "It's hopeless; I'm failing." She tossed the text on the coffee table.

Conner glanced at the problem. "No, you messed up the volume."

"But I divided that away," she protested.

"That's not how division works." Conner sat down next to me on the couch and looked over Sarah's other shoulder. "You can't forget math principles because you're in science class. It's like a cake; you need the layers of cake to put on the frosting."

I smiled at Conner's help, but Sarah let out a grumble, "great, now I have to remember all the crap from my least favorite subject to deal with this crap."

"And she can't bake," Sammy added with a giggle.

"Yeah, but that's a basic math principle. The only time you can get rid of something is by subtraction. You can keep endlessly dividing the shit out of anything," Conner leaned in closer as he inspected the problem.

I could feel Sarah being distracted by the intoxication of his proximity. He started working through the problem with her as her eyes clung to his chest.

"The sugar cube is 11.2 grams with 2 cm sides. So, you know the grams and the centimeters are not going anywhere." It shocked me that Sarah's attention had shifted from Conner to the problem. "So, what's your formula to get density?"

I snuggled into Danny. He let his body wrap around me like a vine. My eyes felt heavy as my mind drifted, only vaguely aware of Sarah and Conner working in the background. Their voices floated around me.

"Density is mass divided by volume... The volume is the length of the three sides that make the cube... So, the length is multiplied by height, then multiplied by width. It's a cube, so you know all the sides are the same. So, you take the two centimeters three times... Centimeters cubed... You did it."

"My head hurts." Sarah let her head fall to the coffee table with a thud.

"Maybe a bit more studying later," I offered.

"Yes, please. I want to lie on a lounger, read about the horrible fashion choices of celebrities, and not think about finals," Sarah moaned without lifting her head.

"Ah, finals- sucks to be you," Danny teased.

"Danny and Conner graduated last week," I explained to Sarah.

"Not cool, dudes," Sarah shot at them without a hint of teasing.

The boys splashed in the pool all afternoon. Danny and Conner tossed Sammy to the deep end as he squealed with delight over and over until I was sure their arms would fall off from lifting him. Sarah and I spent the afternoon side by side on loungers, lost in a meandering conversation from Jacob, to Exam Jam, to finals and back. Occasionally, we would lower our voices for a few tidbits about Conner and Danny. The sleepover's details were disappointing to Sarah, and she was suspicious of what she dubbed the 'platonic pledge.'

"So, let's talk Exam Jam," I let out a groan as Sarah broached the subject.

"Any chance you won't make me go? What if I cry? I just broke up with my possible soulmate."

"Hard no on both the won't-make-you-go and the possible-soulmate. Also, I expected waterworks warfare, so I built up an immunity. You're going to go, you're going to look hot, and you're going to bring two gorgeous boys with you."

"Ah no, that's not fair to any of them." I crossed my arms in stubborn defiance.

"Any of who? I'm pretty sure they'd happily escort two sun-kissed beauties to a party."

I caught Sarah watching Conner's arms flex as he shot Sammy across the pool. I couldn't resist stealing a look myself, but of course, he saw me and gave me a head tilted smirk.

"I don't think it's a good idea to bring them with everything that happened between Jacob and me. He thinks I cheated on him. Showing up with the guys will fuel the rumors."

"Okay, first, you didn't cheat; he's just an ass. Second, we graduate in like twenty minutes, so who gives a fuck what they think? Third, and my favorite point, when they see these two, anyone that thinks you cheated will forgive you. You've found yourself a rock-star and a brooding bad-boy."

"As far as I know, Danny doesn't play a single instrument, and Conner is hardly a brooding bad-boy. He's... shy." I snuck another look at Conner. "Besides, we're supposed to go to dinner at your house; what are we going to bring them there too? We can't just kidnap them from their lives."

"Hey," I hid behind my magazine as Sarah yelled out to the pool. "You two cool with dinner at my place and a party tonight?"

I peeked over my magazine to see them look at each other and shrug.

"Sure." Danny flopped his arms on the concrete of the pool edging and watched the dark brown of the moisture seep out towards the chairs.

"Jacob will be there," I added, thinking it would change their minds.

They swapped looks again. I could have sworn I saw an eyebrow slip above Conner's sunglasses.

"Yeah, we'll go. We should change, though. I've been to a couple of these preppy parties. They're... preppy. You cool if we skip dinner?" Conner's rasp mixed with the summer breeze.

I wondered when Conner would have gone to a Willsden party.

The boys headed home, and Sarah wrangled Sammy from the pool and into a towel. He was talking a mile a minute in a mix of lingering excitement from the day and exhaustion and too much soda. I envied him, wishing I could babble the stream of consciousness in my head; thoughts on Danny, Conner, and Jacob. Instead, I held them in, secretly hoping Danny would stay over again and I could ramble as we fell asleep. Sarah reminded me to look hot, which I heard as casual. My room still smelled like Danny as I slumped down on my bed, trying to avoid a shower. I gave my arm a sniff, smelling a mix of chlorine and sunscreen. I needed to shower.

I let the scent of my strawberry shampoo fill my nose, and the soapsuds tickle my back while I hummed along to the radio and mentally wandered through my closet. I got sidetracked, wondering if boys mentally put outfits together. It seemed like they could match any pair of jeans with any button-down and look good. Conner didn't even need to do that. Seamlessly, my mind reversed to Danny, and I knew he didn't give any thought to his outfits. The suds were gone, and my muscles tensed beneath the cooling water leading me to shut it off.

I tried to block out the thoughts of boys with my hairdryer, but it didn't work. I longed for the empty mind I had earlier in the day, a desire to space for just a few minutes to reset. I even straightened my hair, hoping to fill my concentration to no avail. The distraction attempt was so futile that I rushed through my makeup to get to the Bennis house. Sarah and Sammy would distract me. I pulled on the jeans that Sarah always said made my ass look the best and a lace camisole. One look in the mirror gave me cute enough confidence, but I paused when I saw Danny's hoodie slung over the back of my desk chair, all warm and inviting, like a hug. I knew Sarah would never let it out of her house with it, and I wanted it to lounge in the next day, so I left it where it was.

I could hear the volume from inside the house when I arrived at Sarah's, so I skipped the doorbell's politeness and just walked in.

"How much soda did you give him?" I heard Mrs. Bennis exclaim from just inside the living room.

Sammy was amid an epic run at the floor is lava. "Three, I've had three root beers!" He proudly exclaimed.

"Sorry," I cringed behind her.

Mrs. Bennis gave me a sincere smile, "I probably would have given him four if he had been home."

I appreciated her easy forgiveness.

"You look beautiful," Mrs. Bennis added before doing the parental sympathetic head-tilt, "I heard about you and Jacob." She squeezed my hand. "Greg and I are always here if you want to talk."

I wanted to burst into tears from the compassion.

"And Sammy has been quite the chatterbox about a couple of new friends you have. He seems very taken with this Danny," Mrs. Bennis finished with a wink.

"Danny seems equally enamored with Sammy. Sammy even invited him to pizza & movie night."

"The more, the merrier. If it gets Sarah and Sammy in the same room without a screaming match, I'll take it." We shared a knowing smile before Mrs. Bennis excused herself to finish dinner.

Sarah approved of my outfit and even complimented me on my hair, but insisted on more than lip gloss. Sarah was terrific at make-up, whereas I wasn't even sure where you learn to put on make-up. There was no class for it unless I missed that day. Sarah hovered around me, primping and plucking, before letting me see the final product. She was good at not going overboard. I looked like me, but slightly better; Emma 2.0. I gave Sarah a nod of approval.

"So, are both boys off-limits?" Sarah questioned as she plopped down on her bed. She didn't seem as annoyed as the clarification would seem.

I imagined Sarah with Conner, and a knot formed in my stomach. Then I thought of Sarah with Danny and a different knot formed.

"I don't know," I admitted.

"Okay, they're yours until you know."

I had never been more grateful for my best friend than at that moment.

"You can have Jacob," I offered.

"Yeah, hard pass." We both burst into laughter.