Chapter 12
Beelzebub and I instantly stopped in our tracks the moment we heard the voice. I felt cold sweat flushing over me as I noticed Abaddon approaching us from the other side of the tower. He was still wearing the same black robe from the last time we met. This time there was no hood covering his face, revealing his pale bony face and two black holes that resembled eyes. I didn't dare say anything until he was close enough to us, now his frame blocking the entrance of the tower. I felt any wrong move would send us flying into the void.
The moment he was just a few feet away from us, his eyes fixated on me clearly showing hints that he wasn't necessarily looking forward to company.
"H-hi, Abaddon." I mumbled as I went a few steps backwards to be closer to Beelzebub. The other demon looked at me in bewilderment and then glanced over at Abaddon.
"Hello, sir." Beelzebub suddenly spoke and I almost snorted due to him calling Abaddon sir. He noticed that and elbowed me in the ribs lightly.
The void being's eyes then fixated on him, inspecting him for a few seconds. "What happened to our deal? Is it off already?" His brows furrowed as he turned his attention back to me.
"He doesn't know anything yet." I assured Abaddon, hoping this would get me off the hook. His expression became grimmer as he started moving towards us, my heart quickening its pace. His eyes seemed like they were turning my essence inside out due to their intensity.
"Ah... you're not lying." His face quickly turned to an indifferent expression as if he wasn't about to murder me a few seconds ago. As if I would dare to lie to him. However, he didn't move from the door of the tower, appearing to struggle to decide what to do with us.
"Abaddon... I'm not here for you-know-who just yet." The moment I said that, his expression darkened once again. So I quickly continued talking, "I'm here for Pandora."
A clear confusion washed over him the moment I spoke her name. "I don't believe I've heard of such... Wait a second." He hummed for a few seconds as he started stroking his chin. "Is that the forbidden love the Devil spoke about?" I could swear I saw him trying to contain a smirk.
"It has nothing to do with forbidden love." I said sharply. How much did the Devil tell him? "Now, where's she?" I demanded.
A small chuckle erupted from Abaddon's mouth which had genuinely taken me aback. "Excuse me," he cleared his throat and went back to the familiar neutrality. "I believe your trip has been in vain." He spoke, his voice as monotonous as ever. I clenched my jaw as I tried to push down a fury rising up in me. However, there was a part of me that already knew that this could've been pointless.
"What are you talking about?" I still needed some answers however.
"You don't leave a void." Abaddon simply explained as he crossed his arms. "It just needs to spit you out on the other side."
The explanation itself made my stomach twist in a very uncomfortable way. A flashback from the vision I had back in Alfheim rushed through my mind in that instant. Suddenly, the familiar dread made its way back to my senses.
"The other side?" I asked, trying to keep the conversation flowing. Although in reality I was terrified of finding out.
"How come you don't know about this?" Abaddon inquired with a slight tilt of his head before looking at Beelzebub. "What about you? Do you know what's on the other side of the void?"
The other demon flinched, surprised that he was suddenly spoken to. To be fair, Beelzebub was reeking of nervous energy which would explain why he was so quiet the entire time. "Oh? Well..." He paused for a few seconds. "I'm not sure. The Devil has never spoken to us about it. We really thought you were a myth until now."
Abaddon blinked a few times before straightening his back even more. "Well... now I'm offended." He responded flatly. "I thought he was much more respectable." He mused for a few seconds before proceeding, "Well, either way. You should probably head back. Nothing to see here. Your Pandora is long gone."
Despite already knowing this, my heart sank, surprised that there were more dreadful feelings incoming. I couldn't even blame Abaddon anymore. I was even partially to blame more so than Abaddon was. If my vision was anything to go by, that you were fully aware while being down there, she must've been so terrified. Even I, who only experienced that sensation for only a few minutes, couldn't shake off the leftover feelings afterwards. Let alone her who was actually there.
At once, I turned myself towards Beelzebub and he quickly looked over at me. "I'm sorry I dragged you all the way here for nothing." I mumbled.
"It's okay. At least now you know." He said as he let his hand rest on my shoulder.
"To think I couldn't even have closure." I clenched my jaw again and then looked over at Abaddon again. "Can I see him?" I suddenly asked. There was still one more being who may have needed my help.
"Not with him here." Abaddon replied. "Remember our deal."
"Now I'm even more confused." Beelzebub spoke.
"Trust me on this. Please." I said and fixated my eyes on my friend. He looked at me with a bit of concern as well as a bit of anger. I couldn't tell him anything now in front of Abaddon and I hoped that he would take the hint.
"Alright." He huffed lightly. "I guess I owed you one."
"Don't do anything stupid, Asmodeus. I will know." Abaddon warned with a very stern voice, making shivers run down my spine. I didn't respond however as he quickly motioned Beelzebub to follow him and they both headed in the direction of the exit. I waved one last time to Beelzebub before turning my full attention to the tower.
I took a deep breath and entered it. The interior was also exactly the same as last time and still as cold as ever. I quickly started to climb up the stairs not wanting to linger in one place for too long. The moment I was upstairs, I rushed over towards the center of the room where the cage resided. And there he was... leaning against the bars, as if he hadn't moved a muscle since I last saw him. And he probably hadn't, which was the most heartbreaking thing. In fact, I didn't exactly know what I even wanted to do upon seeing him. All I knew was that I needed to as if to remind him there was someone out there who was aware of what was happening. I didn't know if he could even grasp reality anymore or anything at all but I needed to have hope. There was nothing else keeping me going at the moment.
I walked to the side of the cage and crouched as my arm reached out between the bars. I carefully grabbed his hand that was stretched out on the floor and gave it a slight squeeze. His eyes slowly met mine and I swallowed a lump in my throat. Knowing the current Lucifer had a lot less power and was overall weakened, it occurred to me that I could possibly use hypnosis on him. That way I could get some information out if I could even if it was by force.
I fixated my eyes on his when his pupils started dilating, my heart starting to pound in my chest. As I figured he couldn't move his mouth now, I decided to attempt sending him a telepathic message. My focus on him intensified until his essence was crystal clear in my mind and I could almost touch him in my head.
"Lucifer, if you can, respond to this message."
I kept my strong focus on him while I was waiting for the response. I didn't know what to expect but the fact that even his eyes responded meant not everything was lost. The friend I lost was still somewhere in there, I just had to find a way to get him back.
There was a sudden static in my ears before I could hear his voice as clear as day.
"Hello, friend." I squeezed his hand even tighter. I didn't think I could hear those words ever again. His voice was as silky and soft as I remember it.
"How did this happen to you?" I had to cut to the chase as we didn't have much time. I wasn't sure if Abaddon would want to know I was still trying to act a hero and rescue Lucifer.
"It was the Devil's choice, I had no say in the matter.," soon came his response. I swallowed a lump in my throat as a familiar rage started burning in me when I heard his name again. Before I could deliver any messages, Lucifer sent yet another one of his. "You can't do anything anymore. What's done is done. "
His words struck me deep knowing full well that Abaddon had told me that there were several ways to help him. It seemed like not only was he powerless physically, his whole inner strength and essence were stripped away.
"There are multiple ways I can help you. I don't know what they are but I promise you I will find them. You can't give up yet. We need you back. I need you." I could swear I saw a bit of glimmer in his eyes upon him receiving my message. Like there was a bit of life back to him but only for a moment.
"You were always such a good loyal soldier. But I don't think I can be who you want me to be anymore. I want to die." The moment I received the response, it felt like everything in me just split in half. I couldn't even make myself answer him as I just slowly let go of his hand in disbelief. I frowned slightly, trying to wrap my head around his words. Everything I was fighting for just shattered to pieces at that moment. Every hope I had turned into ashes.
I simply sat down on the floor, staring off into the distance when I heard Abaddon climbing up the stairs. The moment I saw him, words just left my mouth without me being able to stop them.
"Did you know about this?" I asked and Abaddon slightly squinted his eyes as he struggled to understand what I was saying. "Lucifer wants to die." I felt my mouth become dry as I uttered those words.
Abaddon's expression went blank but despite it, I could sense there was some turmoil happening within him. It was very well-covered but it was there.
"What?" He finally spoke, evenly. Disbelief in his voice just as much as I was feeling it. I slowly rose up to my feet and took one step towards him. For a being like Lucifer was, wanting to die wasn't a common thing. Astral beings weren't known to be wishful of death or even think about it. Unlike for humans, death for astral beings was an ultimate event. There was no chance of seeing them again on the other side. That was why Lucifer even thinking about it, despite his condition, was so horrifying to hear. Others would rather sit in the cage for eternity than accept death. They'd know a new age will come when they will finally be free.
"He has just told me that." I replied as I stared at Abaddon, feeling devoid of any emotion whatsoever.
"That's impossible." He mumbled, shock still prevailing in his voice. "There's no way." He continued as he rushed over to Lucifer as he stared down at him, a horrified expression beginning to form on his face. I hadn't realized they became so close over time. I wished there was something I could tell him but there was nothing left in my mind.
"Is there anything we can do?" I forced myself to ask. Abaddon looked up at me as his eyebrows furrowed.
"I can't believe I'm going to help you." I was sure he was going to dismiss my attempt.
"Why sudden change of heart?"
"Lucifer can't go like this." Abaddon said firmly. "I won't allow it."
I raised my eyebrows as I looked at him. He sounded oddly sincere which was what scared me. It felt like I missed a few chapters while I was away. "I mean... I appreciate it. But why? I've never—"
"You ask too many questions." Abaddon interrupted me sharply. I immediately shut my mouth, not wanting to irk him too much and send myself flying down into the abyss. But at once I felt the glimmer of hope return to me.
"So what do you have in mind?" I inquired as my eyes scanned over Lucifer. His body was still as lifeless as ever. I didn't know what I was expecting.
"There are... two ways." He replied hesitantly, his eyes locking with mine. "Both are tricky." He continued as he started pacing around the room. He took a deep breath before finally stopping in his tracks. "I believe we must get him to Samael."
The moment I heard that name, I felt instant shortness of breath. "Him?" I asked just to be sure I heard it correctly.
"Him," said Abaddon firmly. Samael was... maybe even worse than Abaddon. And it wasn't because of what his responsibilities were but because he was the most difficult fallen angel to deal with. He was in a sense the Grim Reaper of demons but he was also responsible for all manners of reincarnations. Before residents of Hell would reincarnate on Earth, they'd have to pass through his area. The area was almost like a room of ultimate judgment and he'd decide where demons would incarnate. Demonic incarnations on Earth were more common than one would think. However, it was most frequent among lower ranks as they'd disrupt the order the least. If higher ranks would decide to incarnate without it being predestined to or needed, it could cause chaos within Astral and outside.
Due to heavy responsibilities Samael was juggling at all times, his personality was far from pleasant. There were many demons that wanted to incarnate on Earth all the time and he had to deal with them almost every second of the day.
"So... Are you suggesting we let Lucifer reincarnate?" I asked carefully. It wasn't the sanest idea and I knew Abaddon was also aware.
"Unless you want to have a talk with Yahweh, there are no other options." Abaddon paused for a second before continuing, "we can always let Lucifer die. But you and I both know that it'll cause even more disruption."
"I don't understand. I thought you didn't care what happened to him."
"And I don't." Abaddon responded almost instantly. "I just don't think Lucifer is in his right mind to decide what's best for now." His aloofness was back and I finally felt like I was talking to the familiar Abaddon. However it also made me even more uncomfortable. Despite his reasoning, I didn't believe him that it was all there was to it.
"But what if it's the best thing we can do for him? What if we make things even worse by interfering?"
Abaddon frowned at my question as his expression darkened slightly. "You're forgetting I'm the ruler of the abyss. No such petty rules bind me. Whatever happens afterwards, I'll still have everything. It's the others that will lose."
"And you're willing to risk the entire law of Astral just to let Lucifer live?"
"If need be."
I was completely taken aback by his responses. So many thoughts were rummaging through my head. Was it possible that Abaddon cared? For some reason him caring was a lot more frightening than him not caring. At the very least, he came to understand the importance of Lucifer's existence. I hoped now that he understood why I was angry all this time. However, Abaddon didn't even show any anger or rage. It still appeared that he was doing all of this out of duty. But as he said, he didn't abide by any rules. He didn't have to do this.
I was trying to study his demeanor as my eyes took notice of every sudden movement he'd make. As expected though, he didn't give out any hints of his real intentions.
"You're a peculiar being." I said through a smirk. "I want to trust you but... at the same time, you've also made a deal with the Devil before."
"I understand your hesitation. You can take your time to decide but not too long. It's a matter of time before Lucifer says the same thing to the Devil and I believe he will grant him his wish." Those words struck somewhere deep inside. Abaddon was right. I had to decide quickly before the Devil got his hands on Lucifer.
I simply nodded in response. It was a big decision to make and I couldn't help but worry. There was no way of knowing if Abaddon was going to keep his end of the deal.
"How do I know you won't back out?" I suddenly asked.
"I have no reason to." I took a deep breath as my attention on him grew in intensity. My eyes were trying to pry him open, to set apart the mechanism that was called Abaddon. There was no budging. All I could do was take a leap of faith into the abyss. At once, I reached out my hand towards him.
"Let's shake on it at least."
"How very human of you." Abaddon snickered and refused to give me his hand. I scoffed before pulling it away.
"Then how about signing a contract?" I raised an eyebrow and Abaddon smiled in amusement.
"That sounds... better." He nodded. "Let's do it elsewhere though in case we get interrupted." Signing contracts with other demons was a bit longer process than with humans. I nodded in understanding and Abaddon turned around, starting to walk downstairs as I followed right behind him.
We were soon back outside, the surroundings still remaining the same. There was only a small breeze going through the air. Abaddon started leading us northwest of the tower. The area was covered with yellow and brown leaves on the ground, the trees having been mostly bare. It seemed like every direction in this realm had its own season which made me smile. Despite this being a realm of an abyss deity, it was rather calm and peaceful.
Eventually, we came to a small clearing among trees and Abaddon stopped in his tracks. He turned towards me before he undid the robe around him, revealing a black leather tunic accompanied with a silver belt and a silver pendant necklace. The robe fell to the ground and melted into it, transforming into a black smokey circle around us. Soon, everything around us began fading into shadows until nothing but pure darkness was all that was surrounding us.
It seemed that Abaddon wanted to take a few extra steps and was taking contracts seriously. Usually a magic circle would be enough but he wanted the deal in contract to be engraved into the very essence of Astral. It means if any of us doesn't fulfill their end, Astral deals the final blow. That way, there's no way for either of us to get out of it unscathed.
Us being lifeforms of Astral indicated that we were closely bound to its laws and workings. Unlike the god humans believed in, Astral acted directly and forcefully when asked to interfere. I wouldn't say Astral was in any way personified, it was rather a force as well as a place.
"I see you're serious about this." I pointed out through a chuckle.
"I don't plan to do anything heedlessly." Abaddon simply explained before a small scroll appeared in his hand. He unrolled it and lifted it up towards me, revealing a blank paper. "Now, what do you want written here?"
I hummed in thought as I stared directly at the paper across from me. "If Abaddon backs out of our deal regarding Lucifer at any point, I'm allowed to tell everybody about Lucifer and make them aware of what is happening. In turn, Abaddon loses the realm." While I was speaking, the words were getting spelled out on the paper in red letters. The moment I said the last words, Abaddon's expression darkened visibly. He didn't find my idea amusing at all but as a respectful deity, he didn't say anything. It seemed only the rules of contracts worked on him.
"If Asmodeus backs out of the deal at any point in time, he brings Loki to me." Abaddon said suddenly, making my heart start beating hard in my chest. I looked at him in shock as a small smirk played on his lips. What benefit did he have from Loki? I clenched my jaw as I was glaring daggers at Abaddon, trying to figure out what he was up to.
Soon, he started approaching me before handing me the scroll. "Hold it for now." He mumbled before summoning a dagger in his hand and cutting one long line across his palm. I held the paper horizontally as he let the black blood leak out of his hand onto the sheet. Once he was finished, he handed me the dagger and he took the paper. I followed his example and let the blood from my hand flow onto it. As soon as my blood was absorbed, the letters on the scroll started glowing before the light dimmed again and the paper disintegrated into tiny shiny pieces that lifted up into the darkness until they got swallowed by it. It looked like a million little fireflies got consumed by a black hole. However, that was the sign that our contract had been forever remembered by the Astral.
The moment the last piece disappeared, the darkness around us subdued and we were once again back among the fallen leaves.
"Why Loki?" I asked as soon as we were back, not wanting to waste any more time. Abaddon leaned down and picked up his robe on the ground before putting it back on.
"Because without him, you're useless against the Devil." The moment Abaddon said that, I felt the familiar fury rushing through my whole being. I had to contain myself not to punch him in the face. Was it true? Was I really useless against the Devil without the trickster god? I couldn't ask him though because that'd mean I was doubting my own abilities.
"How do you even know about Loki?" I asked sharply.
"My dear Asmodeus, I know every little thing that goes in your head. Everybody's head in fact." Abaddon quickly replied with a small amused smile playing on his lips. He walked past me and started heading back to the tower and I followed right behind him. Not even my head was a safe space in this realm.
"I had an odd vision a while ago... and," I began recalling the memories from back in the Norse realm. I wasn't sure how he was going to react but I needed a few answers, "...and it was in the void. Well what seemed like one. Despite it being a vision I felt like a part of me was there and it seemed like it was... a vision of the future. Does it sound like anything you'd be familiar with?" I asked, carefully looking up at the side of his face while we were talking. The face didn't give off any expression however.
"How did you feel afterwards?" He glanced quickly at me before returning his gaze in front of me.
"Uhm... Loopy if I'm being honest," I laughed a little but felt my stomach twisting in itself. "It was really hard for me to separate myself from the vision. For a few minutes, it was like part of myself was still there." Once I finished talking, Abaddon was quiet for a bit. At once he stopped in his tracks and stood in front of me.
"I can't disclose a lot but by the sound of it, I think you should be careful from now on. The future is not a one way road as you know. But there's always one future that you'd end up more likely to follow. If I can advise you this however," he cleared his throat and then proceeded in a very low but firm tone, "stop trying to seek vengeance against the Devil."
The moment I heard his words, I breathed in sharply. "Why are you suddenly telling me all this?" I asked despite already having a bad feeling about the answer.
"I feel like it's my duty to tell you before you end up regretting it." He explained and a familiar intense feeling of anguish surrounded my being.
"I don't think I can back away." I said sharply, seeing visible surprise on Abaddon's face. "Not now. There's too much that is rotten." I stared hard at the other being, his gaze also fixated on me as if trying to peel away the walls I built. Chances were that Abaddon was the only one who knew exactly what was going on in my head. And this time I didn't try to hide it.
"If I'm to die then so be it." I snapped and pushed past Abaddon, heading towards the area where the portal was. Abaddon's words stuck with me and they didn't seem to want to leave. Just the fact that he even felt a need to tell me this despite his lack of empathy concerned me greatly.
"Suit yourself." I heard him saying behind me in a nonchalant voice. Neither of us spoke all the way to the giant blue orb portal. I knew that the vision didn't mean anything good but I never expected it to be this bad. Unfortunately for me, once I started on something, I had to see it through. There was no part of me that considered giving up. All I had to do was never speak of the vision again so others wouldn't try changing my mind the way Abaddon did.
Before reaching towards the portal, I turned to the void deity once again, "why are you warning me? I thought you didn't like meddling."
"It's my duty. My realm of knowledge."
"So what I saw was inside of the abyss?"
"Indeed."
I shifted in place by his quick response but simply nodded, refusing to show any sign of fear I was feeling for the first time. "I'll come back when I settle some other things." I murmured before I spread out my arm towards the orb and soon I was standing in front of Hell's walls.
Taking in deep breath and with shakiness in the limbs, I opened the door of the palace. As I was passing through the hall, everything else around me was blurred out. Images of all that could happen in the future kept rushing through my mind. And none of them were positive. Humans once said that ignorance was a bliss and I was starting to believe it. I was trying to fight the urge to quiet the images by the usage of vices. I knew that once the effect wore off I'd be met with the same ugly truth. This time not even vices could help and it was even scarier than the possible future I was facing.
I needed someone to tell me that everything would be fine but at the same I couldn't tell anyone what I found out. It was time to accept that I was always on my own and to accept my circumstances. There was no one coming to save me from myself. The apparent hopelessness and rage were fighting each other in me and I wasn't sure which one was going to win in the end.
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