"GOT IT, jeongin?"

the biker snapped out of his stupor. they were currently ankle-deep in the water and chan had been explaining some things to him when he began to zone out a bit and focused on other things besides the words coming out of chan's mouth. jeongin was a (sort of) mature adult(ish) of eighteen, but as soon as he caught a glimpse of chan's body, he felt like a young, bumbling twelve-year-old again. it had caught him off guard when he had approached him on the beach after he had finished changing; he thought that there was some random weirdo rummaging through their stuff, and he grew slightly apprehensive. but upon recognizing chan's trademark silver hair, he fully relaxed.

well, until the surfer turned around.

holy shit was the only coherent thought that jeongin could come up with when he saw the male before him. he was absolutely ripped, and the biker couldn't stop himself from openly ogling at him in awe. shirtless men were nothing new in jeongin's life— the male members of the stray souls (especially hyunjin and occasionally changbin) loved to show off their muscles— but for some reason, seeing one of his buddies shirtless and seeing chan shirtless were two completely different things for him. while one was disgusting and cheesy, the other invoked a weird, panicky feeling deep inside of him that he did not care for at all. 

jeongin had been staring at the veins that trailed along chan's pale arms when he finally came back to reality and found the surfer himself staring at him questioningly. "jeongin, were you even listening to me?"

jeongin's face flushed red at being caught. "uh... no?"

chan sighed, but the small smile that graced his lips told jeongin that he wasn't annoyed. "i was saying that we're going to paddle out a little further out where the waves are better. i find that it's always better to learn by doing rather than watching. does that sound good?"

jeongin hesitated. on one hand, he had a really strong urge to prove himself to chan. he wanted to show him that he could do this and that he wouldn't fail him. he wanted to make chan proud. but on the other hand, he couldn't...

he shook his head slightly to rid his mind of the thought. "yeah, let's do it," he said, trying to hide any ounce of doubt in his voice.

chan glanced at him, his eyes filled with something that jeongin couldn't decipher. "...are you sure?" he asked. "it's a bit rocky out there, and sometimes the currents can get pretty rough. i'm not saying that i don't think you can do it or anything, i'm just telling you that it can be kind of dangerous, so there's no shame in just staying in the shallower area..."

is he trying to talk me out of it or something? jeongin thought skeptically. the surfer looked a bit hesitant and he continuously drummed his fingers on his surfboard almost as if he were anxious. and seeing this— seeing how chan was so clearly looking out for his well-being— jeongin nearly changed his mind right then and there. the fear in his heart was so close to spilling out, and he opened his mouth to tell chan...

...but then, behind chan's shoulder, he saw how changbin was messily clambering onto a surfboard next to a grinning felix; how minho and jisung were calmly paddling out to the open sea; and how hyunjin sat on his surfboard playfully teasing seungmin, who was trying to swim away. and after seeing how all of his friends were so determined to do this, jeongin was filled with newfound resolution.

i'm going to keep up with them. i need to keep up with them.

"i'm sure. let's do this."

chan's lips drew themselves into a tight line. "okay," he said, before turning away from him to walk further out into the water. he suddenly whipped around, holding his pointer finger in the air. "but! if at any point at all you start having second thoughts, you have to let me know, okay? promise me."

there was an intense burning in chan's eyes, but rather than it striking fear into jeongin's heart, it actually made him feel sort of strange. he didn't know what it was, but there was something about the evident worry in the surfer's gaze and the caring undertones in his voice that made jeongin's heart begin to beat a little faster. he liked the feeling that he got when chan said things like that. it showed that he really, truly cared about his well-being.

he's so nice, jeongin thought as he followed chan further out into the water. he was so caught up in the kindness and all-around amazing qualities that the surfer seemed to exemplify that he didn't even notice how they were getting deeper and deeper into the sea. it wasn't until the waves lapped right below his bare chest that he realized what he was doing and began to panic.

"uh... chan? can you help me... uh..." he gestured to the board that floated next to him. "uh..."

chan smiled, his dimples causing jeongin's heart to melt. "do you need help getting up on your board?" he chuckled when jeongin gave an embarrassed nod. "no worries. i didn't expect you to do it on your first try. here, i've got you."

jeongin thought that chan would talk him through it and tell him how to successfully climb onto his board without sliding off and looking like a fool. what he did not expect was for chan to swim over to him, wrap his hands around his abdomen, and lean down next to his ear, saying, "i've got you, okay?"

holy shit. if jeongin wasn't pink before, he sure was now. here he was, a panicked gay, being hoisted up by a really (probably straight) hot guy. he felt the way that chan's hands tightened momentarily on his skin as he lifted him up before setting him gently down on top of the white surfboard and loosening his grip. he kept his hands there, though, even after jeongin shifted around to balance himself.

"are you good?" chan asked. all jeongin could do was give him a small nod, fearing that speaking would give away how flustered he was.

chan didn't pull away for a few seconds more, but when he did, the younger boy felt like he was going to combust; the surfer casually rubbed a small patch of skin on jeongin's waist with his thumb before turning away, and the biker thanked god that he did because at that moment he was bright red— and not from the sun beating down on his back.

"alright," chan said and climbed onto his own board with the smoothness of someone who had done it a thousand times. jeongin made a mental note of how his back muscles tightened as he did so. "so to move around, you're just going to paddle forward. if you want to turn, use one hand to push the water backward." he demonstrated it for jeongin and the biker watched in awe. "do you want to try paddling out?"

jeongin nodded excitedly. "yeah! let's do it!"

"then away we go!"

☀☀☀

"are you sure i can do it?"

after paddling for a short amount of time and waiting for a longer amount of time, chan instructed jeongin to get ready. before they had gone in the water, all of the surfers had taught the group of bikers what to do when a wave approached them. they practiced how to get up and stand on their boards, as well as what to do in case they fell off. however, doing it on land was completely different from actually doing it in the water, and frankly, jeongin didn't think he would be able to get off of his stomach.

chan laughed when he told him this. "that's perfectly normal for a first-timer! here, i'll go first and show you how it's done."

and he did. on the next wave that rolled past them, chan paddled out before gracefully jumping atop his board, causing jeongin's eyes to pop out of their sockets. how did he do that? he thought as chan rode the wave like an expert, a thin line of sea foam trailing behind him. 

his heart raced when the wave began to curl and chan's frame slowly began disappearing from sight into the heart of the wave. he couldn't stop himself from yelling "no!" when the wave finally crashed down and his friend's body was nowhere to be seen. oh my god, oh my god, oh my god—

he let out a sigh of relief when chan's head popped out of the water, laughing. jeongin stared as he flipped his silver locks back and subconsciously wondered how it was possible for someone to look so good even with their hair looking like it just came out of a washing machine.

"chan, that sucked!" jeongin looked to his side to see jisung clapping his hands like a seal a good distance away. minho sat on a surfboard next to him and stared at chan with wide eyes. he must be impressed, jeongin thought with a giggle. there's no doubt about it: that's minho's 'how-the-fuck-did-he-just-do-that' look!

"yeah, man!" felix (who was a little bit behind jeongin) hooted. "usually you ride those kinds of waves super well! what's gotten into you?"

jisung glanced over at felix with a wolfish grin. "oh, i think i know what it is. chan's just nervous because he's got a little c—"

"i will burn your pictures!" the silver-haired boy shouted and jisung immediately shut up. felix burst out laughing and whacked his surfboard repeatedly as chan swam over to them, his board floating behind him (as it was attached to him by his ankle strap). he stopped at the front of jeongin's board and held onto the edge of it.

"so, jeongin," he said, peering up at the biker with sparkling eyes and a wide smile, "what did you think?"

at that moment, chan radiated such intense puppylike energy that jeongin could just picture him with ears, tail wagging expectantly behind him. it was, without a doubt, one of the cutest things he had ever witnessed. "it was super cool!" he exclaimed. "you're really awesome, chan! i wish i could be like you!"

the other surfers "awwed" and jeongin heard jisung whisper "how pure". chan sunk so that the bottom half of his face would be submerged underwater, but from the crescent shape of his eyes, jeongin could tell that he was smiling.

"hey, where's hyunjin?" changbin asked, and it was then that everyone realized that both seungmin and hyunjin were not among them. suddenly, a wave passed by them, as did two screaming bodies.

"is that...?" jisung trailed off, and jeongin's jaw dropped.

"oh my god, it is!"

hyunjin and seungmin were surfing together on one board, seungmin clinging onto the taller male like it was the end of the world. it would've looked like a scene from a romance movie if both of them weren't screaming hysterically, their shared board wobbling erratically. jeongin couldn't help but let out a laugh at the sight. if only i could film this! he thought.

"woah, i didn't know that seungmin knew how to ride tandem style!" felix said. chan shook his head.

"he doesn't."

"...oh."

the group watched in silence as the pair soon fell off the board in a dramatic flourish; well, hyunjin fell off, but grabbed seungmin's arm at the last second and ended up dragging him down with him. the surfboard popped up out of the water, an ankle popping up with it, and a flailing hyunjin soon followed. he gripped onto the board and tried to climb back on it, but ended up flipping it over. the group laughed at the sight. poor hyunjin, the epitome of confidence and composure, was being sorely humiliated all thanks to a floating piece of foam.

"well, jeongin, it won't be tough to beat your friend when it's your turn to surf," felix grinned. "after a spectacle like that, anything would look good!"

jeongin gulped. he had forgotten that he would have to do it too, and everyone would be watching.

"felix is right," chan said. "in fact, why don't you go right now? i'm sure you're itching to try it out!"

damn it! "uh, actually, maybe changbin or minho should just go—"

"don't worry about us, innie," changbin butted in. "i know that you were really hyped to do this, so you should go ahead."

and that's how jeongin ended up laying flat on his stomach, waiting for a wave by himself. chan insisted on clearing everyone out from the area to avoid collisions, so they were all a good distance away from him. chan was to his front, ready to jump in just in case something went wrong.

"are you sure i can do it?" jeongin asked. from his place on his board, chan gave him a thumbs up.

"yup! you got this, jeongin! trust me!"

'trust me'? jeongin took a deep breath and exhaled. yeah, i can trust you, chan.

it wasn't too long before the surfer perked up and yelled, "start paddling!"

jeongin took off, heart racing. adrenaline pumped through his veins, the need to prove himself coursing its way through his bloodstream. he could hear everyone cheering for him, and while that should've made him smile, it only made him more nervous. 

"up!" chan shouted and jeongin shakily peeled his body off of the surfboard and went on his knees. he was shaking from head to toe, and he felt like he would fall at any second. why did i ever think this was a good idea?

"stand!" jeongin wasn't sure if he could. he attempted to put one foot on the board to steady himself, but that only made it jerk underneath him. he lurched forward but stopped himself from falling at the last second. breathing heavily, he tried again, but the board wobbled once more and he collapsed back onto his knees.

i can't do it.

"jeongin!" he heard chan's voice yell through the roar of the wave that was growing fast. "jeongin, you have to stand!"

i can't do it.

the crest rose further. "jeongin! hurry!"

i can't.

a shadow climbed onto his back. "jeongin!"

i can't.

the wave began to envelop him. "jeongin, get out of there!"

i—

the last thing he heard was a voice calling his name before the wave crashed down on him, and everything went black.