PETER PARKER
Present

"Happy, please!" I begged him, "we have to do something! I can't let MJ get hurt, especially because of me." My eyes began to water a bit but I cleared my throat and choked them down.

Happy sighed and rubbed the back of his neck. "It isn't safe right now. I know how much you like her but at the moment this isn't your job. I can send some guards to watch over her but you have to stay here."

"Then what is my job, exactly?" I scoffed.

"Right now, it's to stay here and let me handle it," he insisted.

"No," I began, "that isn't enough. Aren't you the one who's been encouraging me to be Spiderman again? Where did that Happy go? Because I like him a lot more."

He shook his head and groaned. "You know I'm only doing this to protect you, it's not fair for you to blame it on me."

"Yeah. I know." I chuckled bitterly, "so who's fault do you think it is?"

"Who's fault for what?" he questioned.

"This. All of this. Tony dying, Mysterio dying, Black Widow dying, Captain America off the grid for good and now MJ is going to die too!" I cried, voice rising to a high pitch as it broke in half. "Tell me, who's fault is all of that? Because I'd love to know."

I knew it wasn't Happy's fault, obviously, and he knew that I knew that. He understood what I was asking.

Asking if he thought it was my fault.

He didn't respond at first and just pulled me into a hug. The second I felt his arms wrap around me I began to sob into his chest, "who's fault is it?" I blubbered, voice barely coming out as a whisper, "it's mine, I did all of this. I'm the villain, just like everyone's saying I am," I choked out.

"Look at me, it isn't your fault. You might have special powers but you're still human and it isn't fair for everyone to expect you to be perfect, for you to expect yourself to be perfect. I know everyone is tough on you but that's just because we see how much potential you have," he mumbled and rubbed my back soothingly. "Out of all people to believe in you, Tony Stark did. That's one of the world's biggest accomplishments if you ask me."

I kept crying. I couldn't help it. Everything hurt too much.

"It's okay, Pete." He consoled, "it's going to be ok, just calm down, yeah?" I nodded and continued to let the tears poor out of my eyes for another moment before pulling away.

I wiped the droplets off of my face. "So can I go?"

He looked away guiltily, "I'm sorry, but no. The civilians are still convinced you're a villain and there's a killer out there just waiting for you to show up so he can kill you too. I need to protect you, I promised Tony I would protect you at all costs and that's exactly what I'm doing."

The hurt echoed across my features and my fists clenched. He went to talk again, probably to tell me I was being irrational- which I was, but I shot out a web over his mouth.

"I'm sorry too." He looked at me with wide eyes and struggled to get it off but to no avail. He's just a normal guy. He can't get it off himself. I shot out two more webs to stick each of his arms to the wall. "That'll come off in two hours, don't worry!"

I felt bad but now was the time to be selfish. I can't let anyone else I love die. I just have to remember what Quentin said.

"Maybe if you were good enough, Tony would still be alive."

I need to be good enough this time. I can't let myself get held back and watch everyone I care about die. I couldn't look up to meet his gaze.

"Maybe I'll die, I don't know. But if it means I can save at least one life then it's worth it. Because of me, Tony died. My own dad disappeared with no explanation and Tony cared about me more than that man ever could. Tony had faith in me that nobody could get rid of and I messed up. I messed it all up. And Mysterio.

"I thought he was good and I was stupid enough to give him the one thing Tony gave me when he died. I trusted someone I had just met because I was scared of facing my own responsibilities! I was scared to mess up and disappoint Tony and I just ended up doing it even more in the process! I gave them to him because I'm in love with him!"

I didn't turn around to face him when I walked toward the door. I couldn't see the look on his face.

"I have to be good enough this time." I whispered, "I can't live with myself anymore. Every day I wallow in self pity and cry myself to sleep. I can't cope with so much death anymore. And if I die," I cleared my throat, "find someone right to replace me. Someone who's actually worth something."

And with that, I left.

I knew the chances of me dying were quite high. I was out of practice and fueled by my own misery. I was full of bloodlust, and heroes aren't supposed to think like that.

I guess I really am the villain everyone thinks I am right now.

When I got to my school I looked around the place. It's funny how I actually kind of missed it when I always used to hate going. I went to put my mask on but I debated if it's even worth it anymore. Everyone knows who I am anyway. I decided to wear it anyway.

It was the lunch period for my grade and so that's where I first went. When I first pushed open the cafeteria doors no one noticed me since they were all engulfed in their conversations and drama. I looked around the room to find Ned and MJ but neither of them were in our usual spot.

"Is that Spiderman?" someone gasped.

Suddenly everyone's attention traveled to me but I didn't pay any mind to it. I don't care anymore. They can think I'm a villain if they want, as long as MJ and Ned are safe I couldn't care less what happens to me.

Flash walked over to me hesitantly. "Parker?"

I ignored his question, "where's Ned and MJ?" I asked him.

Everyone gasped in unison when they heard my voice. I don't think they were scared like other people were because everyone knew me. They knew I was like a quiet kid with a big brain and that was it. That's all I was, so that's why there was nothing to be afraid of. They knew me and that's why they knew I wasn't harmless.

"No one knows where they are, they've been gone all of today." He looked like he was two seconds away from shitting himself and I silently revealed in it. It was just a few months ago where he was calling me Penis Parker and bullying me everyone chance he got, but he was obsessed with Spiderman. It's funny how shallow people can be.

I groaned and looked around the cafeteria. "Nobody knows?" I called, hoping someone would step up and tell me.

What if they were kidnapped, or worse?

"Take off your mask!" someone in the crowd yelled and suddenly the cafeteria was full of noise.

I shifted from the unwanted attention. These people never cared about me once before all of this. I pulled it off and the room became even louder with everyone's questions.

"Are you really a villain?"

"Did you and MJ break up?"

"Did you kill Mysterio?"

Normally, I would be cowering to the ground. But I was caught up in the one goal I had to accomplish before I died. And that was to save MJ. I could stand in the room confidently and at ease for once. It was actually quite refreshing.

"I'm not a villain! Mysterio was using drones to create the Elementals so he could become a hero. He had a feud with Tony Stark and he wanted to take his place. I didn't kill him either, I don't kill people mercilessly like he does," I spat.

"Where have you been?" another person asked.

"Regrouping."

"Why are you here?" another person.

"To find Ned and MJ, they're in trouble."

"Are you going to be the next Ironman?" another.

"No."

Everyone gasped again like they had no other reactions to things.

"I'm just another kid from Queens that got lucky, if you'd call it luck." I shook my head with a bittersweet smile. "Being a superhero has a lot of advantages and disadvantages. You get to save lives and make people happy, but in order to do that you give up your own happiness in the process. Everyone I love dies because of me."

I felt a hand on my shoulder and I looked to see who it was. She was a random girl from my chemistry class who I'd talked to a couple times. She'd always been pretty friendly, but I didn't know her.

"They don't die because of you," she whispered. "They die because there are bad people in the world. The blame lands on them, not you."

Another guy stepped up, he was my biology partner last year. "The difference is that you can save them this time. They're still alive, aren't they?"

"You're a hero, Peter."

"You can do this, we believe in you!"

"Be the hero the world needs you to be, the hero Ned and MJ need you to be."

A smile quirked onto my lips as I relished in the praise I was so used to not getting. I was always berated for making mistakes, for breaking the rules, for listening to my gut rather than what I was told to do. And maybe all those other people were right, but these ones can be too.

I have to be good enough this time.

"I'm sorry." Flash approached me, "for treating you the way I did for no reason at all."

I nodded, offering a half smile before shooting a web up to the ceiling and swinging out of a cafeteria window to find Ned and MJ.