Thursday, May 28, 2009

The minute Moira and I plunged into the water, I found myself fighting for my life. Every ounce of my breath felt like a nervous attack waiting to explode.

The crash was a bit painful. And if it wasn't broken glass that hit me, my body must've been struck by a hard rock, since I developed a red bruise on my hand. I could slightly move, but the leather strap of my seat belt tightened and the pressure I felt was unbearable.

I panicked as we only had a couple of moments before the car would sink to the ocean floor. And it was all up to me to figure out what to do next!

Moira probably knew what to do in these cases. She was the Coast Guardsman, not me. They were trained to save people, protect our nation's ports, and conduct search and rescue missions.

Moira's one tough cookie; I'm nothing compared to her.

Who was I? Just a plain Jane. But now I don't have a choice, it's as if I were put to the test.

But I think the alcohol I consumed earlier caused my adrenaline to kick in. I was wide awake, and a fight or flight response came upon me. I looked towards my left to see if I could tap Moira, but my sister's eyes were heavily closed. The impact must have taken a massive toll on her.

I tried calling out her name, but found it difficult to shout in the water.

"MOIRA! MOIRA!! WAKE UP WE GOTTA GET OUT OF HERE!!"

GULP! GULP!

"DEAR SISTER!!! COME ON, WAKE UP!!! YOU CAN'T DIE ON ME!"

Even though I could hear myself shout, bubbles formed instead. And I knew water molecules must have entered my mouth as I spoke because I tried to spit them out.

In addition to that, the airbags deflated, causing my hands to flair in the air as I forced them to protect my face. A smoke-like residue was present in the air, but couldn't pinch my nose on time, for it quickly spread. I found it hard to breathe, but I was adamant to get through this disaster.

I held my breath for a few seconds and used my fingers to puncture the nylon straps of the airbag.

With that done, I knew that the next thing to do was to get my seat belt off, but it was stuck no matter how I yanked at it.

Come on, belt. Why won't you budge?

Feeling like an idiot as I talked to an inanimate object, I suddenly came up with the idea to search Moira's glove compartment. I remember that she stored emergency items there. But one thing was for certain, I had to push through the airbag's remnants in order to reach the glove compartment.

I was able to open it as she never locked it, and prayed nothing sharp would hurt me. Feeling for something handy to use, I touched an item that felt familiar. It was her Swiss Army knife Dad gave her as a Christmas present long ago. I remember that she showed it to me, as I too was in awe and wanted to try it out, but as a young teenager, I couldn't handle anything labeled as 'too dangerous ' in her eyes, so Moira forbade me from utilizing it.

But now this was definitely a time it needed to be used, so if I accidentally hurt myself with the shank, may heaven help me!

I carefully opened the blade portion of the contraption and placed the knife away from my body as I started cutting the leather part of the seat belt. I was also careful not to let the blade snap against my fingers.

But my vision became darker than it was before. It was a moment where I wanted to give up, and prayed for a miracle, but in my heart, I knew I couldn't give up. It was a now or never event.

As one of the straps from the seat belt fell off, I floated towards the driver's seat kicking my feet as I went. Making sure that the knife was in my pants pocket, I zipped it up. Thus, I floated to Moira's side by flapping my arms in the water.

I only knew the basics of swimming. Dad didn't teach me a lot, since he was often busy with his work, and mom often tended to her patients; so she hardly had any time to teach me anything. Thus, all my training underwater was based on my childhood survival skills.

But I floated in the water, even if it meant for me just to swing my arms like a doggy paddle. I saw the exact same thing being done on television, so I imitated it from memory.

It's amazing what one can learn by observing actors in intensifying roles.

I tried to cut her seat belt strap as well, but before I could even open my pant's zipper, I felt some manly hands around me. I tried to struggle away from whomever was trying to keep me away from my sister, but the diver's hold on me was too strong. Thus, I let him carry me. In my mind, I thought he would be a handsome merman, but what are the odds of that happening? That's just ludicrous.

I tried to call out my sister's name again, but as before bubbles formed as I yelled. And she still remained silent. I refused to believe she was dead, but didn't know what else to do.

And then another dark shadow appeared and it picked up Moira from her seat.

I finally gave up, believing our time was up and wept.

***************

Luckily, a driver previously heard that big splash in the ocean the car made.

That motorcyclist happened to be my brother, who was also looking for his sisters. Joshua wanted to apologize to Moira, but he could see that it was too late.

I bet he used his motorcycle's horn to alert other drivers, because it woke up the old man in charge at the drawbridge office again.

My brother alerted the Coast Guards sailing nearby to help out, after he went on a rampage on the poor drawbridge caretaker.

At first, he didn't know who fell, but when he saw our bodies, Joshua went ballistics.

Once my sister and I were on land, they took us to the nearest hospital to be checked out for hypothermia.

***************

When I woke up, I realized my sister and I were placed in a room together, but in two separate beds.

I tried to sit up, but my back gave in, so I just turned to my right side.

I then saw the IV (intravenous) inserted in my sister's right arm. It was connected to a medical stand with some fluid flowing down.

I started to cry, as I couldn't hold back the tears.

All we did was plunge into the water, it couldn't be that serious, could it? If she dies, I'm blaming myself.

I looked down at my arm. There wasn't anything attached to it, so I started asking myself what I did wrong.

How could that happen? Looking back at these notes, I wish it was me that drowned that day instead.

***************

Suddenly, the door opened. It was my nemesis who came to visit us.

I was infuriated once Owen walked in, that I frowned, making my cheeks hurt.

Yet the words I wanted to say came bursting out as I hiccupped.

"You - you are a real co -coward Owen! You are a real certified scum - scumbag at that party ! My bro -brother, sis-sister and I had to leave before all chaos ..."

Hiccup!

I couldn't stop these involuntary movements that were happening in my body, but I forced myself to continue.

"Now Mo - Moira is lying in the ne-next bed in this hos - hospital with me and I'm shi - shivering!"

My voice was hoarse, but the blankets I was buried in warmed me up a bit.

As Owen faced me with his puppy dog eyes, my friends and brother came into the room.

Thus, I turned to Paige and Robin.

"And you two, I -I thought you were my fr - friends! How could - could you allow 'him' to attend the party! For heaven's sake don't you guys have a c -ca-clue that Owen dis - disappoints me? How could you guys do - do that? Don't you love me any - anymore?"

Paige was in shock at my outburst and was about to open her mouth when I motioned my hands to 'put a lid on it'. I didn't want to hear her nor Robin's excuses.

Lastly, I faced my brother.

"And you Jo-Joshua, had the decency to make Mo mad. Really, you knew there's a draw- drawbridge we drove o -over. How could - could you just make up a simple child-childish game at a time like this?"

My teeth chattered violently, and I pushed a button I felt near my bed. I didn't have a clue what it would do, but that alluded the nurses to come in the room and asked everyone to leave as they felt my visitors were causing my emotional stress to trigger. And to top things off, I found out that my sister was three months pregnant. It was a shock I couldn't comprehend, that I was told that I blacked out.

The mayhem that Moira and I went through took not only her life away, but the baby that could have been my niece or nephew.

After Marlene died, my heart sank. I would sit in the hospital's waiting room day after day staring at the white smudged walls. The nurses soon learned who I was after seeing me sit down with a gloomy expression on my face and after a while of calling my brother to pick me up, they left me alone.

However I was baffled when Owen started showing up to find me moping around. He'd sit by my side, smile at me but never said a word to me, but deep down inside I knew he wanted to cheer me up. It was as if he wanted to say I'm here for you Mae. I'll never leave you.

***************

Tuesday, June 2nd, 2009

Five days later after I was released from the hospital, we buried my sister and the baby that stopped growing in her womb.

I still had a hard time walking, so I was given crutches to support myself. I  refused to ride In a wheelchair because I knew I could still stand on my own two feet. Despite my brother's attempts to change my mind, he eventually allowed me to have my way.

The day of the funeral was a miserable time that I would never forget. My brother and I heard the same dreary sound of the trumpet, as we heard it being played at my parent's funeral three years ago.

I didn't pay much attention to the priest who preached over the ceremony. I touched my sister's casket, which was now covered with the American flag and cried. I didn't have enough time to tell her I was sorry.

And once the casket was ready to be lowered down I couldn't resist crying again. I threw two roses for good luck on her burial site and ran.

Owen and Josh called out to me, but I just couldn't face them right now.

Whoever impregnated Moira remained a mystery, until I confronted the suspect.

But I couldn't believe Moira got pregnant when the doctors announced it to the 'family'. I mean how could she? For days I couldn't sleep since I wondered who the father was.

Was it possible?

No, No!

It couldn't be. She hated Owen after he left her for that tramp. He couldn't be the one, right??? I'd just die.

I don't want him to be the one.

I just needed some alone time.

***************

Monday, June 15, 2009

Several days after the funeral, I went  to a park to chat with my friends, and brother.

With my crutches, I walked back and forth with sweaty palms behind my back, dying to know who the  father was.

I picked a private place near some greenery, and the others followed.

"Okay, guys do you know who impregnated Moira?"

All of the faces before me turned ghostly white. Um, does that mean they know something I don't know?

I raised my eyebrows upwards and looked at my brother.

"Do you know something I don't know, Josh?"

He faced me like a toy soldier with hands behind his back and nodded his head no.

"Don't look at me like that! Mae, you know I just got here from Cuba a few days ago, so why would I know anything? It's your friends you should interrogate."

I knew my brother was telling me the truth. A true soldier would never lie. Would he?

Joshua must be like the young George Washington who told his father the truth when he chopped down a cherry tree in their garden.

I raised my voice again and let out a big sigh.

I gave a dissatisfying look at everyone else in the group, letting them know I wasn't done with them.

"Alright, I believe you Josh. But I'm gonna get to the bottom of this!"

I turned around to see the rest of my audience.

"So, is anyone going to answer me now?" For some reason, I was looking straight back at Owen that day.

He returned my gaze and answered me.

"Don't look at me like that Marlene! I know you must hate me, but I wouldn't go that far to hurt you and your brother."

He paused with his statement, and then continued on with his own rage.

"HOW CAN YOU THINK I WAS THE CULPRIT? I ALWAYS WANTED TO PROTECT YOU, BUT YOU JUST REJECT ME. I ALWAYS WANTED TO BE WITH YOU AND SPEAK TO HER AGAIN . BUT DO YOU KNOW HOW BOTH OF YOU HURT ME TOO? HONESTLY MAE, YOU NEED TO TAKE A GOOD LOOK AT YOURSELF. YOU'RE NO LONGER THE PERSON I ONCE KNEW!"

The latter half of his statement shocked me. It made me stop in my tracks, and to take a good look at myself. I did not expect that outburst. What he said was true. I didn't expect Owen to rant back.

I turned into an 'officer' cross-examining people without even knowing it. I was no longer my old self. Whatever happened to the weak Marlene?

My former self vanished before my eyes, not knowing how it was going to affect other people.

I could feel my huge heart disengage. The tears started to form, but withheld it no matter how much I battled with my demons.

I gradually spoke up again and was careful in choosing the right words.

"I'm sorry Owen, I'm not accusing you, but since you went after Moira at the party, what was I supposed to think? You ... you are actually known to be a ruthless heartbreaker!"

Oops! That just slipped out of my mouth. I need to take those words back, before another argument occurs ... but it was too late.

Owen began to open his mouth to object, but Joshua stopped him right at the nick of time.

"ENOUGH!"

Both Owen and I stopped looking at each other.

"I had enough with you two! We are here because we want to know how Moira got pregnant, am I correct?"

We all nodded yes.

"Okay, we don't need to argue on some nonsensical situation that will take us away from the main subject."

He looked at Owen and told him to stop arguing with me. Joshua did the same to me after he saw a hint of a smile upon my face.

And I suppose he was right, for arguments get us nowhere.