Chapter 35

I woke up, feeling the itch on my skin cooldown on the clean bedsheets. Trailing the bandages on my arms and face, I knew that I was not at a hospital but rather a place that I had hoped that my plan succeeded in bringing me to. Honestly, I had predicted this, all of this.

Seriously wanted to pat myself on the back if it wasn't for all the wounds that seemed like they would just snap open by a single feathery touch.

In the chaos of Light's interrogation, dad would refuse to leave the place for the wellbeing of his son. Knowing that his house was burned to the ground, and leaving me in the hospital alone would most likely have pushed me into further depression as the only thing that could have prevented mom-as I led others believed, was dad.

"Sayu," I heard dad's voice gravely before I turned to him with a grim look. His eyes were completely damp and swollen, along with his disordered clothes and unshaven face. It seemed as if he had not slept in months, and that the only thing that was pushing him on was the hope of his family. My eyes flickered to the phone on his hand in a split second, realizing that he was listening to his voicemails the whole time I was knocked out.

"Where were you?" I uttered emotionlessly as dad flinched at my cold tone.

"Where were you when I needed you?" I said again as guilt surfaced on his face, torturing him with the hard truth.

"I'm sorry Sayu, I was too busy-"

"All I needed was a call!"

My voice raised over him with a broken outburst. Soichiro's gaze downcasted onto the floor of the small room, his trembling chin held the monotone voice from spilling out of his body. I saw his slouched posture in his seat as he covered his face with his veiny hands, openly weeping.

"You could have prevented everything," I closed my eyes and entered a choked sob, burying my face into my knees. "Everything."

Take advantage of his guilt.

Break him!

"I hate you, dad," I uttered past my lips before turning my back towards him.

"I hate you."

For the next couple of days, I stayed in that room, quiet and empty.

Honestly, I was thinking of a way to contact the outside world from the place I was in right now, but nothing came to mind. From the perspective of the Kira Taskforce, I seemed to be moping, trying to accept the hard truth that my mother willingly tortured me and killed herself in front of me.

My move had been an overly dramatic one to the point where L would not be able to question if my mother's actions were manipulated or true. First, it was the image of Kira that L had. Kira in his mind was childish, haughty, proud, and would never lower himself to do such victim-blaming acts on themselves.

Second, was that he already knew that I was not Kira or the second Kira. Misa Amane was Kira the second with foolproof evidence, while I did not have the characteristics of Kira at all. Not to mention that L had no idea what the limits of the Death Note could do, not to mention manipulating the actions before the victim's death.

Even if the whole plan was suspected after he had the Death Note on his hands, L would be too busy trying to prove his claim as Light being Kira, and everyone else would never think that a daughter was able to inflict this many wounds and kill off their mother so heartlessly.

In fact, the moment that the task members start suspecting that my mother was controlled by Kira, that would prove to erase the evidence on Light's end, seeing that Kira was trying to push me onto L, creating this illusion that I was trying to assist Light. That would mean that Kira was actually trying to frame Light with this move.

L's assistance, named Watari, came frequently, asking me if I wanted any food or any accommodations to the room I had right now. I had accepted nothing but sweets, but the moment I placed them in my mouth, tears came spilling over my food. Watari gave me my space, letting me relax until I thought it was enough.

Those were actually true tears, due to the pain I had received and the embodiment of trauma coming from both my past life and current ones, even if the current one was forced by me. I was not an idiot, and if I could use that trauma to my advantage, then I would make it so that my move would go so successfully to the point where I would get everything I wanted.

Dad had come to visit me a few times, each time he wept in front of me, apologizing profusely how he was not there when his family broke down. I knew that I was breaking him in the slowest way possible, but this only made my plan better.

You see, Soichiro valued his family more than anything. He was also guilt-tripped and had a sensitive personality when it came to relationships. This forced him to value his family more. Every hatred for Light being Kira was erased from his mind when he saw me. Kira had ruined his life, but if Light turned out to be the criminal, then all he could blame was not saving Light when he could.

I created an illusion that he could have fixed everything. That, everything was his fault. If he had come home to see how his family was doing, instead of neglecting them for his son, he would have prevented the loss of his wife and some part of his daughter.

My cold attitude made him feel indebted to me. Desperate to gain my attention and forgiveness. And that just made everything much better.

Don't worry, Soichiro. There will be a day that you can earn my forgiveness with your life.

My eyes trailed to the hotel window that was located on the top level of the building. This must be the hotel that L stayed in. He hasn't moved to his final HQ yet. I closed my eyes and counted the days that I had been saying in the room. Everything was quite orderly here. There was a personal shower and bathroom, not to mention the food here was professionally prepared by Watari. Even the sweets were probably from the best patisserie shop in this city since L liked sweets so much.

It was about time.

I nodded once before turning to the clothes that Watari had prepared for me in the closets. All of them were oversized baggy sweaters, not in the L style, but more formal. They were thick and made me look much healthier than I actually was. I took the sweater and hurled it over my head, checking everything on me before I reached the door, opening it to reveal a very awkward bunch of investigators and L staring at me.

They were watching the recordings of Misa Amane and Light in their prison rooms. Dad was sitting on the couch as he looked up at me with a relieved smile.

"Sayu!" Matsuda waved and came up to me with the quickest speed he could muster from sitting on the chair for so long. I gave him a small smile as he checked over the scars I had on my arms before wincing a bit.

"Hey, Matsuda," I greeted back with a hoarse voice. Honestly, I had made sure not to scar my face that badly. The only accidental damage that I gained was from that fall I dramatically made on the street. Scratched cheeks, and the unhealed wound on my forehead that was wrapped with bandages.

For the other scars, I wasn't that concerned. The body scars would disappear in no time, be it 3-5 years, it didn't matter. Not to mention that the beauty treatments in the future would shoot up with the technology developed. Scars would not serve a burden to me, only an advantage to remind my dad of what he could have prevented.

"How are you feeling, Sayu?" Matsuda asked gently with his tired black eyes. I nodded stiffly before replying that I had better days. Dad trudged towards me, opening and closing his mouth before opening them again.

"Before you say anything, dad," I held up my hand to silence him. I sighed with tired eyes before gazing into his red ones. He had been crying again.

"I don't forgive you, knowing that you could have stopped mom's death."

Matsuda gave me a sharp look of surprise as dad silenced him with his own look.

"...But I will accept the facts," I whispered as dad nodded slowly. "Moping does not suit me."

"While it is good that you are feeling well, I may have to question you a bit, miss Sayu." L's voice captured everyone's attention as we turned to see him. Most officers started to raise their protests before L silenced them in a similar way as I did to my dad.

"Are you willing to take the place, Miss Sayu?" His sharp gaze searched mine as I sighed under the pressure.

"Seeing that you have housed me, I will not comment on how inappropriate this interrogation will take place," I shrugged before looking back at him. A small smile crawled up his pale face as he motioned Watari to prepare the sweets before Watari escorted me to the couch.

I complied obediently, aware of the wary gazes of suspicion and worry passed through the others. L came over, slouched as usual before placing both of his feet onto the cushion, reaching out to the jar of sugar cubes before taking them out one by one to stack them into a wobbly tower.

I took a sip of the warm tea, noticing that it was Chamomile for calming before flashing Watari who was standing behind L, a polite 'thanks.' It was a bit bitter, and made my eyes trail towards the jar of sugar that L had in his possession.

"Yes, you may take one cube."

L answered before I could even voice out the question.

"Only one? That's a generous offer you're placing on the table," I raised my eyebrows as I heard dad give me a voice of warning which I ignored purposefully. L's lips quirked into a cute smile before pushing the bottle of sugar towards me along with the pliers he added in.

I thanked him before selecting the two most cubed ones and placing them into my drink, stirring them calmly before taking another sip to taste the flavour. I heard Matsuda whisper how amazing it was for me to be so calm under L's creepy gaze. Giggling at the comment, I noticed L's watchful gaze studying each of my movements.

I picked up the slice of strawberry cheesecake in front of me, just as I was about to dig in, L interrupted my action.

"I have a couple of messages from Kira in the past," L said as he watched Watari hand me a couple of pictures with words. "Please order them for me."

I glanced at the pictures, obviously, the only way that the pictures were supposed to be ordered and made sense was in 'L do you know Shinigami love apples' order. I raised my eyes from the pictures questioning him silently before I spoke out.

"If I were to be honest, aside from the obvious message, I would like to comment that Kira sucks at grammar."

Matsuda choked in the background.

"I am well aware of the fact, Miss Yagami," L gave a smile of amusement.

"Just call me Sayu. Miss Yagami reminds me of..." I trailed off and gazed at my father who avoided my eyes. L only nodded politely before adding his own preferred name.

"Ryuzaki, huh?" I murmured it under my breath before nodding. "Got it."

I told L the only way that he could read the message, or how it would make sense before he swiftly ordered Watari to take back the pictures, picking up the cake with his bare hands and chewing with his mouth open. I made a face before clearing my throat.

"Anything else?" I said.

L turned towards me instantly, continuing to chew with his mouth open as talked.

"Are you aware that your brother is being interrogated under suspicion of being Kira?"

I heard my dad shift as the others held him back, shaking their heads as dad turned his worried eyes to my face. By now I had noticed that L was trying to make me cave under social pressure, seeing if I would mess up under the gazes of several men instead of one. A very smart move against a young girl at the age who cared about the eyes of society.

Well, not me, at least.

I placed a small bit of cake into my mouth and hummed nonchalantly.

"You have mentioned it before, and I believe you are aware that you have my permission."

The smile on L widened at my words as he shifted comfortably in his weird position.

"Would you like to see?" He said.

This time, my dad did not hold in his protests.

"Ryuzaki! Sayu is only 14 years old! I forbid her to watch anything like her own brother being tortured!" He shouted before his fellow coworkers held him back harder.

"I'm actually 15," I narrowed my eyes at dad before his eyes widened, then instantly turned down to the ground. "June 18th was my birthday, dad."

"Not very loved, are you, Sayu?" L glanced between my dad and me, chewing abnormally fast before gulping down the food in one go.

"I do my best to scrape by," I shifted my gaze back from my father who was now finding his shoes much more interesting than L's conversation. L nodded sympathetically as if he knew what being not loved felt like.

Bro, you come from an orphanage, please, don't act as you know it if you actually don't.

"Tell me, Sayu, how does it feel getting compared to your brother despite having your own skills almost on par to your sibling?" L didn't leave the topic despite knowing that I might have not been comfortable talking about how I was treated by my mom who almost killed me. I frowned, making my emotions visible so that I could come off as easily readable. Too bad the expression on his face did not change.

"While I am surprised to hear that my skills are on par with Light's," I scoffed a bit. On par? Bruh, I'm basically leading him to fight you! I am so much more than Light!

"To answer your question, it only made Light and me closer in the long run," I replied as casually as possible. I knew that revealing this would literally be me throwing myself out there and admitting to being a Kira accomplice, but if I had said in any way that I was jealous and hated Light, it would not match up with how Light acted around me.

L knew that Light would be able to sense if I was hostile towards him. He also knew that Light would be smart to twist his relationship with me so that I could only admire and worship the grounds that he walked on. L only wanted me to confirm his thoughts.

It was a checkmated question.

"I've heard about your exceptional observational skills from Mastuda," L stacked another cube as Watari provided him with a box of donuts. L picked up a strawberry glazed one before biting into the gooey goodness and continuing his explanation.

"I've also heard about your interest in the interrogation team."

As if the news was fresh to my dad, his mouth gaped speechlessly and turned to Mastuda for confirmation. I smiled ruefully at Matsuda as his face turned pale, trying to explain to both his coworkers and my dad.

My pawn had worked.

Implanting my connection with Matsuda, I practically predicted that my information would reach L's ears. I was waiting for this moment where L would consider my skills and help him without actually joining the task force.

"I am interested," I said slowly as L nodded in response.

"Very well, Watari, prepare the videos." L said out before turning to Soichiro and the gang. "Also, it would be helpful if Sayu viewed the videos with me alone."

I watched as my dad left the room with a grave expression, not knowing what to say but to only turn with his apologetic and grim eyes to search for my forgiveness, but I only looked away.

Watari took us to the table filled with miniature TVs and cords, turning them on to reveal Light's gasping body thrown off the bed and his hands tied behind his back. Sweat had matted his hair, causing his shirt to soak his sweat through and through. Saliva leaked out of the corner of his lifeless eyes and his bare feet were now scratched with multiple scars and had broken nails.

"You don't seem surprised, Sayu." L studied my careful expression that was nothing but blank boredom.

"It's to be expected when holding someone who is the prime suspect of Kira," I replied carelessly, not tearing away my eyes from the screen. I felt L shift his head back to watch Light blink and cough from the dryness of his lungs. The fluidity of his eyes made my heart skip a beat, knowing that my brother was indeed good-looking, even in this situation. I wanted to roll my eyes.

"Even when the suspect is your brother?" I felt L's eyes on me but I ignored it.

"Relationships have nothing to do with each other when the suspect steps into the room," I glanced at L who smiled politely at my words.

"You are quite cruel for your age, Sayu." He paused as I heard the plates on Watari's fingers lift from the table that we were just in front of. "Do you know that if your brother is proven to be Kira, you will immediately be held under suspicion as his accomplice?"

Threatening me won't work, L.

"Yes, I am well aware," I replied back. "And is this an offer to leech off your wallet as you place me under your care?"

L blew out his cheeks with a low chuckle.

"You are very welcome," he confirmed after knowing what I was going to say. I nodded before pointing to the microphone and receiving a gesture from him to go ahead.

I pressed the green button underneath the microphone and cleared my throat.

"Ah, ah, testing, testing," I called out boredly as L watched the screen. Light's eyes widened at my voice, looking towards the camera before barely whispering my name with shock.

"Glad to see you're in this state, Kira," I paused and waited for Light's reaction.

"Sayu! I'm not Kira! I swear!" His feeble voice came out more of a hollar than what he could do and forced him to cough. The golden locket shifted on my chest, hitting me lightly as a reminder. "Please, you have to believe me!"

The croak from his lungs felt uncomfortable for me as I twisted my face into a frown before pushing it down, well aware that L was recording every one of my movements with his eyes.

"Kira, I have come to give my thanks for killing my mom."

L's neck snapped towards me as Light's eyes almost bulged out at the piece of information.

"Mom's...dead?"

His whisper was barely there, but still there. L craned his neck to the screen, now completely focusing on Light's face. I gave a light 'hm' at his question before droplets of tears crawled out of his eyes. They were too little for a sob, but they were his real tears. He had been too dehydrated to cry anymore.

My heart skipped a beat when I saw him whimper on the ground, helpless.

"Kira," he muffled. "Kira did this."

I hummed again nonchalantly.

"Kira!" Light screamed not at us, but at the ceiling which trapped him. The voice was so maliciously weak that it made me flinch. "Kira, I will find you! And you will pay for what you have done to my family!"

His strained voice broke into cords as his body twitched from grief, sobbing slightly while he gasped. I let go of the button, releasing the death grip I had on the pole of the mic before shuffling backwards and falling into the seat that Watari had prepared the moment I took the mic.

"You and I are very alike, Sayu." I heard L's intrigued voice before I turned up to look at him shakily. "Even more so than Light."

I chuckled.

"What an honour," my sombre voice came out before cracking a dry joke. "So should I become a detective like you then?"

L's mouth curved up as he placed his two hands on his knees.

"I will consider your position as my partner once we prove your innocence."

I chuckled, leaning my head back into the seat.

"I'll be waiting for your paycheck then."

Author's notes:

So do you guys think that Sayu is similar to L except for a bit artsier?

Personally, I feel like L and Sayu are similar in the ways that they are able to be cruel while also maintaining their existence of emotions since L died after calling Light a friend. But other than that, not really similar LOL.

Talking about that scene, do you guys think that L had purposefully said that to guilt trip Light? Or did he actually mean it? I thought of it like both. L died because he kept doubting himself and had no solid evidence to prove that Light was Kira. But all in all, if L really had no feelings, then he probably wouldn't have a constant doubt and second-guessing himself.

Well, that's just my interpretation of his character though.

Anyhow, have a nice day everyone! Also, a small note at the side, but when I finish the fanfiction in google docs(where I write them in), I'll release them all in a single day so be prepared, I'm expecting myself to give this event more than a week, but less than 3 weeks. Honestly, I am surprised at the pace I can write this in.

Sure, I didn't sleep nor eat for a couple of days to binge write this, but I never thought I would be producing spam of chapters in a single day, hahaha.

I'm not even listening in class anymore, I'm just typing LOL. (っ ºДº)っ ︵ ⌨

Started this fanfiction in the last two weeks of April, finishing somewhere at the end of May or the beginning of June. I've seen so many fanfictions that start off with 5 awesome chapters and then...never update. Thus why I aimed to not stop halfway and finish even if I was sucked into a tornado.

Me as an author: ༼ つ ◕_◕ ༽つ *shoving chapters in your face*

Well, I have a class in 2 hours. Gotta faint in order to have enough energy to listen...though, you probably know what I'm going to do in class (⊙ω⊙).

Comments are desperately needed!