{It's hard finding the time to continue writing lol, I also have writer's block right now. Im going to try and update this every day, or often. I'ma try and make it to at least 1200- 3000 words, though that's a hard task to accomplish. Then Im going to edit the book every 3 chapters and check for mistakes. My writing style may change during the process, sorry about that. Anyways, enjoy this chapter~! I am also starting a new book, and I'm writing other stuff other then this book. Warning, this chapter contains sensitive topics like depression, suicidal thoughts, and self-harming.}
My eyes open to a road of beautiful lavender trees and a smooth dirt road with sparkling white snowflakes. I smile, tears well up, but not sad tears, joyful tears as good memories rush back to me. I sigh, and close my eyes.
I wake up five minutes before my alarm clock goes off. I get up to turn the annoying alarm off. I get dressed putting a 'I love pizza' shirt on, and a red and black hoodie. I slip on blue jeans and head out to pack up some lunch. I slip out some crackers, water, and slices of cheese. I gotta remind mom to go shopping today.
What was that dream about? It was peaceful, an odd place to be in my imaginative head. I chuckle a small bit.
At 5:22 my mom wakes up, also gets ready, and walks out to cook breakfast and make coffee. "God morgen." She says happily.
"Morning Mom." I give a small fake smile.
My mom and I come from Norway, and we had to move because of an... Incident...
I sat down at the table, packing my backpack. I watched my mom cook some bacon. We had little conversation, as we were still tired as hell. She poured some milk, set that on the table for us to share, and put our plates down. We ate in silence until I decided to start up a conversation.
"Hey, mom, we need to go to the store this week, probably today."
"I know..." She paused. "I'll go shopping tonight, okay?"
I nodded my head, eating in silence again.
After I was done, I put the plate in the sink and went to the bathroom to brush my hair and teeth. I walked out, grabbed my binder and backpack, and went to the bus-stop.
After School
I sat on the bench in the front of school, and waited for the mysterious person who texted me and told me to wait at this specific spot. Should I be scared? Am I going to die? One part of me wishes that was true.
I didn't know why I was listening to this text, honestly. I guess I was just bored and curious.
A familiar girl came over with a huge smile on her face, I think I remember her from yesterday. River...was it?
"Hello...?" I blurted, almost a whisper.
"Hey, thanks for waiting here!" The smile only got larger.
I awkwardly stared at the pretty blonde girl. When I say awkwardly, I mean with a shine in my eye and without any response.
"O-oh yeah, o-of course." I chuckled nervously. I wasn't usually used to talking to people.
"So, I'm the school counselors daughter, my mother wanted me to check up on you."
Staring at her in disbelief, I start to wonder if she new my secret. "I- Why i-is that?"
She was thinking of a good response. "Well, ah..." She started to think she should hang out with her more before saying this. "Hey, we should hang out tomorrow to. How would you like that?"
I nodded ever so slightly and faked a smile, I know she wasn't believing the it but just smiled back anyways.
I stood up, grabbing my binder. "I'll uh...see you tomorrow...River." and then walk away.
At home, I'm in my room, door locked, listening to music and working on homework. I smash my head against my desk, frustrated, and confused. Why the fuck do I fail everything? Why do I even stay alive? I stare at the Anti-depresaints on my dimly lit desk. Mmm, it'd be so easy to just... I look away and sigh, trying to push that thought away.
FUCK THIS I push myself away from the desk, and walk to the kitchen, where my mom is cooking dinner. I'll just finish that later. "Hey, mom, what's for dinner?"
"Oh, hey, Comic. Today we're having Taco's."
She must've went shopping. "Okay, need any help?" She shakes her head and goes back to cooking.
I go to sit next to Louie, my dog, and turn the TV on. The TV shows a news reporter, he's talking about a house fire. A dad and the son died in the fire, poor people. I felt bad for the mother and daughter. I changed it to a random show and watched that for 10 minutes or so.
A knock was heard, and I walked up to open it.
"Hello. May we speak to Mrs. Saf?"
I nodded, and called my mother over then walked back to the couch. Petting Louie, I heard some of the conversation.
"Hello...Comic...Being bullied...Cuts... Anti...she okay..." I sighed.
Later that night, I finished homework and went to eat.
"Comic."
"Yeah?"
"Are you okay?"
"I'm fine, mom." I avert my eyes.
"Okay..." She grabs my wrists.
"Mom, I'm fine...Please..."
"Why, Comic?" She pulls down my sleeves. "Why? I know it's hard...What about your Anti-depresaints? Have you been taking them?"
I have deep gashes on my arms and some scars. I burst out in tears. "I...I...T-they told me I-I was useless...and w-worthless...and..." The list went on. At the end we were hugging, she took me to the bathroom and patched my arms up. I love you Comic, please remember that." I shook my head, tears still pouring down my face.
I took in a heavy breath and sighed. I don't want to go back to school...