15. The Ghost In My Machine

The ingredients for this ritual are fairly basic as these things go. Go get yourself two black ropes or cords of about five feet in length, a watch, a lighter or matches, some salt, sage, and a phone, preferably an old fashioned rotary phone but any will suffice as long as it is a corded landline phone and not a cellular phone or smartphone, as those will not work. Got everything ready? Is it night time? It will only work at night. Ready? OK, let’s begin.

The first thing you have to do is purify the area, preferably a darkened room, with the salt and sage, and then make sure all of the doors, windows, and curtains are closed. Now set the two black ropes near the phone and place the lighter or matches next to it. Make sure that your pockets are completely empty and sit next to the phone. Count to the number 13 and then, without picking up the receiver, dial “20496888.” Now is the tricky part. Tie one of the black cords around the phone receiver, lift it without touching it yourself, and dial “25515823,” after which you should count to 13 again and say into the receiver “Hello? I need a cab.” The you should untie the cord, remove it, burn it with the lighter or matches, and replace it with the second cord.

If you have done all of this correctly, you should look outside and find a black taxi cab parked outside. Do you want to continue? Really? Are you insane? Ok then, your call. Leave the house, lock the door behind you and get into that eerie cab, lie down on the back seat, and fall asleep. You will supposedly wake up at 3:30 AM, but you should go back to sleep at this time. When you wake up again you will find yourself on a strange, unfamiliar highway and there will be a hooded figure hunched over the wheel. Just stay calm, do not panic. Outside will seem as if it is another world and a place outside of time, passing increasingly alien landscapes, and when you have finally seen enough of this bizarreness you are to lean over and whisper into the driver’s ear “I have reached my destination.” You will then promptly fall sleep again, but when you awaken you will be exactly back where you started. You are not done yet though.

Now you need to go inside, lift the phone receiver with the cord, and dial “200082,” after which you say into it “Thanks for the ride.” Now untie and burn the second cord, bury the ashes of both cords outside, and sprinkle salt and burn sage over them. You are done! Now, there are some very important rules to remember during all of this. You are never to take the cab to the end of its route or to ride it for too long, so keep an eye on that watch. At no point should you panic or exit the vehicle without following the steps of the ritual. It you feel a sense of overwhelming threat or danger at any time during the process, or you should wake up at any other time other than 3:30 AM that first time, you should end the ritual immediately by telling the driver those magic words. It is another very spooky game that is most likely an urban legend, but are you willing to try it?

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