TW: Mental health; Self-harm mentioned

"Thanks for coming, Jungkook,"

Jungkook smiles at the man, bowing as he walks away. Mr Park has been supporting Jungkook for weeks now. Today is his first day attending group therapy. He didn't want to attend at first, struggling with the introvert in him. He has never been very good a socialising.

The group therapy takes place inside a local church, rented for a few hours so they can sit, socialise, and complete different activities. There are 8 other people in the group, all from varying ages, genders, and backgrounds. There is even a foreigner here.

Today they did some painting. There were no expectations of being an amazing artist or painting something specific. They were just told to grab a canvas and paint something based on the topic. The topic for this session was very simple:

Perception.

So Jungkook drew the first thing that came to mind.

He enjoyed painting it, expressing his perception of himself. Mr Park commented on how Jungkook sees himself in such a dark light and that is reflected in his art. He often refers back to Jungkook's art when explaining aspects of himself he had not considered.

One participant sketched the inside of the church, using varying shades of brown to express the timber that makes up the area. Another participant painted a bird, expressing wanting to be able to perceive the world through the eyes of the bird. Jungkook's painting was the best so far. If this was an art class he would feel quite proud. But after listening to the others, he thinks his work might be a bit dark.

Isn't this group therapy? Jungkook wonders. But, then again, everyone is at different points of their healing journey. Jungkook is just starting.

"Sara," Mr Park calls on the foreigner, "What did you paint?"

The girl looks up, looking a little nervous. She has bright blue eyes, tan skin, and black hair. Jungkook has no idea where she is from, but he can tell she's a foreigner from her eyes. She is wearing black, ripped jeans, a black long-sleeved shirt, and a black cap. She would be around Jungkook's age, maybe older. He can't really tell. To be honest, Jungkook hasn't paid too much attention to her all day. He was too concerned about being respectful to the older participants and avoiding everyone else.

"Oh, umm," She turns around her canvas.

"Oh wow," Mr Park smiles, "That's beautiful... what does it mean for you?"

Sara shrugs, turning the canvas and placing it on her lap, looking down at it.

"That's okay... I know it's tough to talk about these things. You don't have to say anything you don't want to, okay?"

Sara nods, still looking down at the canvas. Jungkook thought the art was beautiful and symbolic. A few of the other participants exchange a few not-so-subtle looks of concern, while the others smile at her kindly.

Mr Park continues around the room before finishing the session.

"Alright, that's all we have planned for today. Feel free to take your canvas home if you'd like and I'll see you all in 2 weeks, okay?" Everyone calls out a response as they stand and help clean up the area. Jungkook starts with the art supplies, putting all the brushes into one jar full of water and placing the pencils into their correct locations.

"Need some help?" Jungkook looks up to find Sara standing near him warily. She gives him a small smile, gesturing to the paintbrushes. He nods, passing her the jar.

"I'll go wash these," She murmurs, turning and walking to the kitchen, right at the back of the church. Jungkook continues putting away the art supplies. Once he is finished, he looks up to find Sara standing nearby, watching him carefully. He walks over to her, feeling more and more trepidation.

"Hi," Jungkook croaks, "Sara, is it?"

"Yeah, and you are?" She asks, holding her hand out to shake. She doesn't look up into his eyes.

"I'm Jungkook, Jeon Jungkook," Jungkook responds, shuffling his feet awkwardly as he takes her hand.

"So, what are you here for?" Sara asks directly as they begin walking towards the church doors.

"Ah... just some stuff..." Jungkook mutters, clearing his throat, "What are you here for?"

"Self-harm," She says simply, "You know, you don't have to be so awkward. We're all mad here," She chuckles.

Jungkook looks down at her, a little surprised by her casual behaviour. He always thought mental health was a taboo subject, even in therapy. But maybe he's just been around people who have never needed to think about it.

They step out into the sun and take a deep breath. Jungkook looks around. All the other participants are gone. Mr Park, however, is still standing by his car, waiting patiently.

"Ah, my ride is waiting for me," Sara smiles, "Mr Park lives near me, so he takes me home after group therapy,"

"I see," Jungkook nods, looking over at Mr Park who is now waving. They walk over to him.

"Hey, Jungkook," Mr Park smiles, "I see you two have met each other,"

"Yes, Mr Park," Jungkook nods.

"Please," Mr Park chuckles, "Call me Jimin,"

"Oh... okay," Jungkook rubs the back of his neck nervously, "I guess I should head home too?"

"Nonsense! I can take you home too if you'd like. You didn't drive, did you?"

"No, I took the bus," Jungkook confirms.

"Alright... well you two live in a similar area so it's fine for me," He smiles before gasping, looking at Sara, "I'm sorry... I should have checked with you first..."

"It's okay" Sara chuckles, looking down at the ground, "I'm fine... where do you live?"

"Oh... those apartments on the main street..." Jungkook supplies.

"No way! Me too!" Sara cheers, "6th floor?"

"Yeah..." Jungkook blushes.

"Wow! We might be neighbours!" Sara chuckles, climbing into Jimin's car.

"Are you okay, Jungkook?" Jimin asks quietly. Jungkook nods, giving Jimin an awkward laugh.

"Yeah, it's just... she's very forward, isn't she?"

"Very blunt," Jimin chuckles, "She's a nice girl. I would recommend getting to know her. She would make a good friend,"

Jungkook nods slowly before climbing into the other side of the car.

Jimin takes them home, dropping them off outside the apartments. Jungkook only spent a few days living with his parents before he moved into his own place. He couldn't stand the look his parents gave him when they realised why he had moved back home. He couldn't handle the shame.

This new apartment is quite a small, studio apartment. But it is cosy and cheap. Which is exactly what Jungkook needs.

"So, when did you move here?" Sara asks as they head inside.

"Uh... a few weeks ago," Jungkook frowns, "How did you know I'm not from here?"

"Seoul accent," She supplies blankly.

"Ah, fair..." Jungkook pauses, trying to find the right words, "Uh... where..."

"Where am I from?" Sara asks.

"Yeah..." Jungkook smiles awkwardly, "Sorry if that sounds rude,"

"No, it's okay. I get it," She chuckles, "I was born and raised here in Busan. My mother is Korean, and my Father is from America. I don't know anything else about him,"

"Oh, I see..." Jungkook clears his throat nervously, "I'm sorry,"

"It's okay, it's not your fault or anything," She responds, "Hey, do you want to hang out?"

Sara stops in front of a door that must be hers. Jungkook's door is the next one over.

"H-Hang out?" Jungkook blushes, "Right now?"

"We don't have to if you don't want to," Sara shrugs, "I'm just bored,"

"Oh... yeah sure,"

"Alright. You can come over here. Let me tidy up first,"

Sara enters her apartment without another word. Jungkook goes back to his apartment, showers, changes, and heads over.

Sara welcomes him in, beaming proudly. Her apartment is full of colour and plush toys, completely different from her physical appearance. She has string lights and LED lights lining her walls. All of her main lights have the bulbs removed. She has a big, fluffy blanket on her bed, which is just a fold-out sofa bed. She has about 30 different plushies of various shapes and sizes. Everything from anime to animals. Her curtains are opened, revealing a little ledge with a pile of books, pillows and blankets. It looks like she spends a lot of time sitting there, reading, and watching the world go by. It is all very cluttered to Jungkook and very unique.

"Oh wow," He chuckles, eyeing the massive bookshelf full of manga, books, and albums, "This is..."

"Amazing? Cool?" Sara laughs, "Childish? Cringe?"

"What? No!" Jungkook chuckles, "It's just different,"

"Well, I am different," She shrugs. She heads into her kitchen and opens her fridge. She pulls out 2 bottles of soju.

"Want one?" She raises the bottle, still looking in the fridge, "If you're an alcoholic I have juice?"

"Soju is fine..." Jungkook takes the bottle. Sara turns around and looks up at him briefly, before looking away. In that small, brief moment they had finally made eye contact, Jungkook's heart raced. He didn't even realise they had not made any eye contact at all. Her eyes are a beautiful colour. Why does she avoid eye contact?

"Sit," Sara gestures to her bed, "I don't own a dining table, so,"

"Ok," Jungkook awkwardly sits down on the bed. Sara sits on the ledge under her window. She opens the bottle of soju and takes a big gulp of it.

"So, what's your story?" She asks, looking out the window.

"M-My story?"

"Oh, sorry. I forget people don't like talking about this stuff," She replies, "You don't have to tell me if you don't want to,"

Jungkook has only known this girl for about 3 hours. But, even so, he can't help wanting to open up to her. Something about her is different, really different. He can't place the feeling he has, but the only way to describe it is as if he has met an alien from another world who is wearing the skin of a human to fit in, struggling to assimilate with people.

She's just strange, but a good strange.

"Well... it's a long story," Jungkook says. Sara turns and looks at him, maintaining steady, intense eye contact without blinking.

"Tell me," She says, smiling.

Jungkook looks away, feeling a little uncomfortable.

"I don't know... you might kick me out if I tell you..." Jungkook chuckles half-heartedly.

"I doubt that..." She says, "Can't be worse than me,"

"I can assure you, I really am,"

"How about this, I'll tell you my story first," She explains, "Then if you want, you can open up to me too,"

Jungkook nods, looking back at her. Her large, doe-like eyes are still on his. Eventually, she looks away, shaking her head a little.

"Okay, well... as I told you my mother was Korean and my father was American,"

"Was?" Jungkook frowns, "Are they... dead?"

Sara shrugs, taking another sip from the bottle.

"No idea," She sighs calmly, "I never met my father and my mother put me up for adoption when I was 12,"

"When you were 12?" Jungkook asks ludicrously, "Why?"

"Because I was diagnosed with... something... a mental disability I guess," She explains, "It was a surprise, really. But it explained why I struggled..."

Jungkook nods slowly. He doesn't know or understand enough about mental disabilities to comment on it.

"She took me to an American psychologist when I was 11 because I wasn't like other kids... I bet she regrets that," She looks intensely at Jungkook, "My adoptive parents purchased this place for me when I was 18 and I have been here ever since. Simply... existing," She gestures around her before giving him a big grin.

"I see..." Jungkook smiles, "It must have been hard for you,"

"Not as hard as it was for those who have had to deal with me," She frowns, "Even my adoptive parents struggle,"

"That's not your fault, Sara," Jungkook stands up and walks over to her, sitting beside her on the ledge, "I can't really tell you I relate or understand what you have been through, but you are a nice person,"

"You don't know that" She frowns, "I have done bad things... terrible things,"

"Oh?" Jungkook scoffs, "What could you have possibly done?"

"I hurt people... people I loved," Sara gulps.

"Can't be worse than being an abuser," Jungkook raises his eyebrow at her. She tilts her head to the side and smiles.

"So you were an abuser, huh?" She says, "I wouldn't pin you for that, Jungkook,"

"Well, there are many things you don't know about me,"

"And there are many things you don't know about me..." Sara looks down, biting her lip, "Like... my brother... he died when I was 5. He was only a baby..."

"You... you don't have to explain yourself..." Jungkook soothes, taking Sara's hand. She takes a deep shaky breath and continues.

"I dropped him. He was crying and I wanted to help... my mum screamed horrible things at me..."

"It's okay," Jungkook suddenly wraps his arms around Sara and pulls her in, "It wasn't your fault,"

Sara sniffles for a moment before pulling away. Her eyes are dark, full of hatred. Jungkook doesn't have to think too hard to realise the hatred is for herself.

"He wasn't the only one... I started acting up in school... I once broke my friend's arm..."

Sara continues explaining her life story. Every heartbreak, every death, every traumatic event, intense disturbing experiences, everything that she has experienced. Jungkook slowly begins to understand her and her behaviour. She is an extrovert with a fear of connection, a fear of abandonment, and deep-seated guilt. He finds himself relating to her mindset the more she talks.

She pauses occasionally, sobbing into her hands or his chest. But overall she keeps her distance. He respects her space and doesn't push her to cry in his arms. But she does a few times. She swings from crying to emotional numbness, talking about incidents as if they are factual occurrences instead of traumatic events.

After approximately an hour, he knows more about this girl he just met than anyone else in his life.

Eventually, she starts to become embarrassed, realising she has trauma-dumped on a strange man she doesn't know.

"Alright, tough guy," She smiles, wiping her swollen face, "What's your story, huh?"

Jungkook looks away, his jaw clenched.

"I don't know... I don't want you to hate me..." He admits. She chuckles, making him look back at her.

"After everything I've told you, you think you can scare me away?" She smirks, "Try me,"

"I already told you, I'm an abuser," He shrugs, folding his arms. She sighs.

"The abusers I've known don't go to therapy, and they definitely don't admit they are abusers," She explains, "Tell me,"

Jungkook sighs and begins. Once he starts, he can't stop. He explains everything that happened with Sumi, right to the last detail. He even finds himself explaining his childhood loneliness and abandonment issues. Even details he has never shared with anyone, including his father's alcoholic abusive moment, which only lasted a year.

Once he is finished, he has shed a lot of tears. He rests his forehead on Sara's shoulder as he lets out every bit of emotion he has ever bottled or ignored. Everything he has felt over the entire 23 years of his life. Like a broken tap that won't turn off, he just lets it all out.

He breathes deeply, his head aching from the pain of sobbing so harshly. Sara pats his head gently, silent through the entire explanation. Jungkook sits up, wiping his face on his shirt. He takes a deep, shaky breath, looking out the window.

"I understand if you want me to leave..." Jungkook whispers croakily.

"I don't," Sara says firmly, "You know... Jimin said something to me that has been at the back of my mind for a while. I never stopped to consider it, but after listening to you, I think I can finally take his advice. Want to hear it?"

Jungkook nods, sniffling.

"He said – The fact that you are seeking help proves that you are not a bad person," Sumi chuckles, "When he first said it to me I laughed in his face and argued with him. But now... I get it..."

"You should really take that on board," Jungkook smirks.

"So should you, hypocrite," She grins.

They chuckle, Sara's words hanging over them like a comforting cloud, waiting to part and reveal the sunshine.

"Want to watch a Korean drama with me?" Sara asks eventually. Jungkook smiles, hope filling the deep hole in his heart.

"Of course," 

(A/N) Just a little update on what Jungkook is up to. 

See ya tomorrow 🫰🫰🫰