You were left on delivered for 2 hours, maybe even 24 hours.

     You finally get the message you've been waiting on.

     You want to give them a taste of their own medicine.

     Tempting. Believe me I know.

     You're fiercely determined... You manage to wait 8 minutes. 8 minutes to their 30 hours. That'll show them.

     You take a hit to your pride.

     You're feeling a little petty.

     You're feeling insecure.

     You're confused.

     You spend your entire day focused on that one person and their texting habits.

     I'm guilty of this too.

     I once cursed aloud as I accidentally clicked on his message rather than half swiping. I accidentally opened it the minute he sent it. I had planned on taking hours to answer like he did.

     I didn't want him to think that I was looking at my phone every two minutes, waiting for his reply.

      Then I felt ridiculous for spending so much time thinking about it.

      Maybe he was busy, and I'm wrongfully petty.

      Maybe he's trying to let me down slowly. 

      Maybe he's ghosting me.

     Maybe he's talking to other people.

     A million different scenarios play in our heads.

      Anxious attachment sucks. But the more you grow an awareness to identify those anxious thoughts, the more you can try to reverse them. And the more you'll stop looking at the phone screen every two minutes.

     So, what's the answer?

     Is there an appropriate time frame to respond to text messages?

     No.

     Answer when you feel like it.

     You can answer as fast or slow as you want. You can double text. You can send a message a month after your last message if you feel you have words left unsaid.

     There's no rules, but do bear in mind that answering too slowly will cause people to turn away. If you truly are that busy just say so. Have an honest conversation. Let the person know where they stand.

      Also, bear in mind that not everyone is on their phone 24/7. While I do believe that people can make an effort to answer at least once or twice a day, sometimes life really does get busy. Maybe they're tired and feel like they can't give you the energy you deserve. Maybe they have personal problems they're working through.

      I work twelve hour shifts, and if it's a really busy day I might not get a break. Some days all I get is five minutes to hobble down my food. If I'm working 10am to 10pm, then it's a possibility that I'll only have time to answer before leaving for work, and right before bed.

      But, I let the person I'm talking too, know. Even just a quick: "Sorry, I didn't get a break, today. How was your day?"

      Honesty. That's all it takes.

     And it works both ways. If you're starting to feel insecure about their texting habits, tell them so. You might not get the answer you want, but at least you'll know how to move forward. Even if that means deleting their number.

     You shouldn't have to overthink it.

     Answer when you want.

      If the time between your replies and theirs differ in a way that makes you feel like you prioritize then more than they do you, then you have a decision to make.

      Rather than stress about their next response, consider what you really want and what you deserve.

      As cheesy as it sounds, communication can improve, but not without communication.