Leaving or staying
"So, what's the matter with you?" asked Kizuna, sitting down next to Jay.
They had all been recovering, patching up their broken lives and mending their health, showered by the placid love and regular careful attentions of Aura Kite. Eight strange days had elapsed, and Epos was the only one still struggling to come to grips with his injuries, although his existence was now out of danger.
Eight days spent in a naturally carved cavern, hidden in the depths of a fresh, comfortable drapery of rocks, tucked away in the top part of a saffron-coloured towering mountain. Eight days away from all that had fashioned their existences so far. They had been sleeping the trauma away, interacting in this safe remote mineral haven, and exploring the surroundings as soon as they were able to walk again. Living with Starling's father was quite an amazing experience, since the man seemed to be able to read minds and foretell most remarks and questions. His medical knowledge and his wisdom were boundless, and everyone had surrendered to his irresistible guidance. Yet silence was still wrapped around the reasons of his presence in what he called the renegades' land, and noone had dared broach on that subject.
"Come on then, what is it that's troubling you?"
Jay looked at Kizuna, perplexed. The young woman didn't cease to surprise him and, quite against his own will, she reminded him immensely of Hera. Such a frail, graceful person, a stunning mix of courage and will... It was beauty combined with determination.
"Like, apart from being stranded in the desert with very little hope to cling to?"
"Come on... as if you didn't see what I mean...I noticed you don't like to talk about yourself, Jay. I see there's a lot of anger that's eating at you. And I know you have a bone to pick with this blond rat, as you call him." Kizuna's crystal-clear laugh resonated behind them in the Cave. Jay winced as the singing notes awoke once again memories of an ancient life. "But... I'm sure there's something else... There's something off with Aura. He's a wonderful man, but he hasn't explained why he has been here alone all this time... And Jay, I feel there's something off... with you too."
"Thank you very much!"
"No, I didn't mean it that way! But I've seen the way you're holding back, the way you seem to be avoiding your friends... I remember what you said in the pod. You, being terminated. You, and Starling... I don't really understand what it is that drives you to be so lonely and angry sometimes, but to me, you're not a bad man. Even if GloCo says otherwise, you're not a freak."
"Thank you... for real." Jay looked straight into Kizuna's eyes. He had known her for a little more than a week, yet it felt as if the young woman had been with them for years. In this place, in the refuge that Aura Kite had chosen, the only master was silence. The only inhabitant was the wind which kept howling, singing, humming in a declination of awe-inspiring sounds all day long. In this wasteland, time elongated and people had to stick together as soon as they got out of their shelter. It was a splendid, yet merciless place.
"Kizuna... You should stop worrying for everyone. You and Ananda need to return to the Red City. You have a future there. We'll find a way to take you back with Arende. But Starling and I... it's gonna be a different story."
"What's the matter with Starling?"
"The more you'll know, the more unstable your life will become. And to be honest, there's a lot I need to find out on my own."
"Well well, guess who's back?" On the border of the giant cave stood Starling, Arende and Ananda, beaming, their outfits yellow with thin dust particles. The three of them had lost weight, the tone of their skin had gone a little darker, Starling's blond curls had grown wilder and dark circles under his eyes bore witness to his former injuries. Ananda's hair was lose and tangled, and Arende's beard had taken on larger proportions. Their silhouettes were clearly cut out against the glorious dark blue skies, as B24's largest sun was already sinking below endless lines of distant volcanoes. In this festival of orange, blue, yellow and white colours, it was hard to believe they had almost died several times. Their smiles told a different story.
"This place really is amazing. If it wasn't for the lack of comfort and safety, I'd declare it the best place ever!" exclaimed Ananda, whose eyes were sparkling.
"But it is a land of danger. Now that you have all regained strength, I am afraid we need to discuss about your future..." said a steady voice coming from the back of the Cave. "And we need to discuss it tonight," added Aura, approaching them at his usual slow, purposeful pace.
Jay got up and headed towards the spot where, night after night, they had grown used to lighting a large fire and watching the sun set. He had become fond of this old-fashioned gathering. This too, was somehow reminiscent of a past life... Picking up a handful of tiny crystals, he rubbed them together in his hands and dropped them on a huge pile of Resins. An instant dark, green hissing fire rose, and they all sat down silently.
"Epos, would you mind joining us? I know you are still weak, but we need to be all together tonight," said Aura.
Like every time Epos came around, everyone grew more tense. Jay knitted his brows and contracted his shoulders. The growing stubble on his chin, his fading bruises, his tousled hair and hardened look, everything in him screamed for a fight.
The noise of shuffling feet and a deep sigh resounded in the refuge, and Epos appeared, limping and slightly out of breath. He was very pale, cast a hurried glance in Jay's direction, and quickly sat down. Aura closed his eyes, obviously conjuring the right words to initiate a difficult conversation.
"Dear friends, a week ago, the alarming noise of your crashing pod draw me towards the borders of Sulphur Bay. I barely had time to take some essentials with me, as I felt the dying energy of your vehicle asking for immediate rescue..." Aura cleared his throat. "What I found there, I had not expected. An old workmate, yet a friend... a young aspiring and dedicated Medic whose parents I knew well... Ananda Lanciarsi, whom I had often met at the Swimming Grounds... the man who was in charge of managing GloCo's headquarters on B24, my former superior... and... the person I have missed most in my hermit's life, my son."
Infinite shades of green were dancing in the entrance of the cavern, on all walls and faces. Far on the horizon, lace-like warm reddish shadows wavered on the mountainous ridges. Silence flirted with the fire's whistling sounds. Aura paused, looked at Starling without a smile, and lowered his eyes.
"A man's decisions follow him all his life. I took some decisions that I do not regret. Yet I have to live with them. Seeing you again was the greatest blessing, my son, yet I wish you had never landed here."
"Why dad... why did you end up here?"
"That much you have gathered already. I know that. It was a decision I took after your mother was re-scheduled. There was a lot I could not live with. Disappearing and making you all believe I was dead was easy."
"Oh... There's a lot you haven't explained then, have you?" cut Epos, an ugly smile on his face.
"There is indeed. Of course you know that Epos. You know the whole story. And this is why I owe you an apology, Star. An apology for being the willing instrument of a nasty experiment involving you."
"Here we are, finally!" added Epos.
"An... experiment?" said Ananda.
"I will never regret it, somehow. But son, whatever happens, you can't ever get back to the Red City. You are not...you are not exactly..."
"I get it that Jay's an outcast, that his Re-Scheduling went wrong... I won't let you down, mate," said Starling, winking at his friend. "And I know I broke my oath, dad. I know all that already."
"Ah, aren't you going to tell little sonny the truth?" snarled Epos.
"For God's sake, what do you mean?" said Ananda in an exasperated voice.
"It seems to me, too many people are hiding something..." whispered Kizuna in a small, sad voice.
"Star, Epos and Aura have things to explain, and the better, the sooner," said Jay.
"You're all but a bunch of lousy losers!" exploded Epos. "You're all afraid of the truth and clinging to useless stupid feelings! You're just...hopeless!"
"You haven't changed, Epos, have you? Still afraid of being simply a human!" answered Aura, frowning. "But you are right too. Starling, what you need to know will undoubtedly determine your future decisions."
"What is it with me then?" cried Starling.
"You... are not who you think you are. Star, you are like Jay, you are a second-born. And you too come from Planet Earth."
Ananda gasped and Kizuna's eyes filled with tears. Jay sighed, waiting. Arende, who had remained silent, said in a coarse voice:
"What do you mean, a second-born? What nonsense is this?"
"Sixteen years ago, my wife and I arrived from another colony with our son. We quickly settled down, made friends, especially Starling. He has always been so easy-going and clever... I was appointed at the head of the Medics Squad. Life was wonderful. But Aegia and I had a secret: we were never able to conceive a child, in spite of our advanced technology and our situation of healthy first-borns. So we accepted the deal that was offered by B24's Commander, Epos Meane." Aura paused and looked at his son. Starling didn't bat an eyelash and stared back, blankly.
"Starling, when you were re-conditioned at age 50, a new rebirthing experiment was carried ut on you. You were handed over to us at the supposed age of 16 and you indeed grew in size and strength after our arrival on B24."
"But... But I am your son. I remember everything!"
"That was part of the experiment: a biological partial reboot of your body, and the implantation of fake memories in your mind."
"You... didn't... do that!?" exclaimed Jay.
"But... The same memories were implanted in Aegia's mind and in mine. We asked, we begged for it. We share the same beloved, beautiful memories. You see... We really wanted a child. Starling Kite was born out of GloCo's manipulations. But he was also born from our loving desire. "
"So we're not related... You're a stranger to me."
"I am not your biological father. But to me, you are my son."
"But... our trips to the Restless Sea? And when you taught me how to swim? And mom...? And.. and...?"
"Never existed. You're a pure product of GloCo's advanced technology!" said Epos.
"Never heard of these experiments. It's... gruesome!" said Arende.
"Very few know of this," acknowledged Aura.
"Hey Star..." cried Ananda. Starling had mechanically risen to his feet, and didn't seem to hear a thing. He stumbled out of the Cave, and blended in with the night.
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