"Oh my stars, you look ridiculous!" Peridot fell over laughing when I showed up at her door and I self consciously brushed my hair behind my ear.

"This is how Steven dressed me for the day." He'd put me in the strawberry outfit, and I'd felt incredibly confident all day. I was starting to lean into it a little, it was fun for the most part. Steven had his eyes on me constantly, and even though I could tell he was waiting for me to fail or mess up, the girls were really nice to me.

"She means you look adorable," Alex brought me inside and sat down on the couch. "Tell us everything!"

"Oh, uhm..." I scanned my brain frantically. I totally forgot I was supposed to be gathering intel like an awkward nerdy spy. "Did you know there used to be another Crystal Gem?"

Peridot sighed deeply. "You must mean Lapis. Yeah, she dropped out halfway through last year. The Forever Wet Dream of my nightmares."

Interesting. "So did you guys used to–?"

"I don't wanna talk about it!" She snapped and I recoiled. "It's a sensitive subject. What else?"

"At the mall last week, they met up with her and he was really touchy with me all day. So were Pearl and Spinel." A bit of heat filled me at the memories. The girls were gentle, while Steven held a possessive firmness that when combined made me feel strange.

"So it's starting then." Alex nudged Peridot who looked a little guilty.

I looked between them. "What's starting?"

"There's parts of this plan that we may have left out."

The energy in the room shifted as I started to feel the intense sensation that I was being watched from every direction, so I brought my attention to the room.

"Come on out you guys."

Gems. They were resting along the coffee table, in the window seat, on the stairs. I spun around as they all began to glow and float, sparking figures that turned into all sorts of beings. Ones with gems on their hands, chests, shoulders, stomachs appeared until the room was nearly full.

I stumbled back as I felt breathing on my neck, but a hand reached out and caught me.

"Whoa there, Uppercrust." A hearty black woman lifted me back onto my feet and dusted off my skirt. My eyes landed on her chest, where a rainbow gem spiraled inwards like a staircase. "I'm a Bismuth."

I tried not to act weird by staring, but I knew that's what I was doing. "Hi, Bismuth."

"You know, you could've just told me why we're here." A girl crossed her arms and sighed. She had a gem on her chest too.

"You wouldn't have come if I told you why. You still don't know why," Peridot rebutted.

She sighed. "Amethyst. But you can call me Amy."

People of every shape and size and ethnicity were surrounding me and I started to feel claustrophobic. "Peridot, what is this?"

"The beginning of a reminder." She said ominously and took off her glasses. "Don't let the Crystal Gems fool you into forgetting the mission, we all have beef with them."

"Steven. We all have beef with Steven." A familiar voice corrected. I saw Lapis sitting in the window seat. "Hey there, Strawberry."

My stomach lurched as they all made noises of irritation.

"Oh, come on. I skipped out on the gym to talk about Steven?" The woman furthest away from me grumbled. She was huge, and I imagined she could snap me in half easily.

"Can it, Jasper," Amethyst snapped.

"Runt!" She shot back viciously.

"Now, now you two," A sultry, British voice cautioned. "Behave."

Holy moly this woman was the curviest person I'd ever seen. Big boobs, tiny waist, large hips that would stop traffic and cause car accidents came into my view. The only thing off about her was her third eye, which I thought was a really detailed tattoo until it blinked at me.

"Sorry, Garnet," The two mumbled.

"You guys should all introduce yourselves. For Connie. Not for me because I definitely remember all of your names," Alex requested.

"Well," Amy started. "You know me, Jasper, Bis and Garnet."

"I can also unfuse into two other people." Garnet added showing off the gems embedded in the skin of her palms. "Ruby and Sapphire, but I don't do it for fun."

"Cool," I whispered. Looking around I pointed to a ginger girl in a dress. "What's your name?"

She grinned widely. "Why, I'm Hessonite of course! But my human name is Belladonna." She bowed to me and I stared at her, bowing a bit in return.

"No one calls her that, we call her Bella for short," Jasper scoffed.

"Your loss." Bella shrugged.

"Peridot... what– what is all of this?" I asked again. I felt like I was dying in fast forward. I'd never spent this much time in this small of a room with this many people all paying attention to me before. There were looks of intrigue and disgust and anger that made feelings I wasn't able to express bubble up inside me.

"We need to talk about Steven," Peridot asserted.

"Oh, no, no, no. I don't talk about Steven. Not anymore." Garnet shook her head.

"We have to," Peridot pleaded. "She has to know!"

Garnet gritted her teeth. "I'm not–," Light burst from her that made me turn my head away and blink.

"He ruined our wedding!"

I snapped back to see two people holding hands in place of Garnet.

"Ruby, he did not ruin our wedding day," Sapphire, I could only assume she was Sapphire, had bright blonde hair, but something was off about her complexion versus her features. She looked black, but her skin was pale like someone had sucked the color right out of it.

"He totally did and you know it!" Ruby whipped back around, her shoulder length wavy hair hitting her in the face. She turned back around to me and crossed her arms.

Sapphire sighed and nuzzled her nose against the carmelly woman, whose anger flush turned softer. "It was our wedding day, around a few years ago now–,"

"Our wedding day. Yes, we are lesbians," Ruby informed me cheekily.

I could see that.

"Anyhow, we were on Homeworld and about to get ready for the ceremony to officially start–,"

"The ceremony that was supposed to be a private event, by the way," Ruby grumbled.

"Are you telling this story, or am I?" Sapphire laughed and Ruby wrapped her arms around her hips, kissing at her neck.

"Sorry Sapphy."

The room erupted into fake gags and grossed out groans. I thought they were cute. "Come on you guys, that's too much now," Bismuth laughed.

"Shut up," Ruby mumbled and did it again.

"Steven tells us to do it in his ballroom–,"

"I'm sorry, his what?" I interrupted.

Peridot snorted. "Did you not know Steven was a Diamond?"

I stared at her blankly.

"He's more powerful than all of us combined. He literally rules Homeworld, he outranked the old leader White, or Blanche as she presents now, the second he hit 17." Amethyst turned into a cat and dug her claws into the carpet as she stretched.

"Knock that off!" Peridot threw a pillow and Amethyst yowled.

"Steven tells us it looked crowded where we were, so he told his gems to move things to where he could be in close proximity if something went wrong." Sapphire simpered, but Ruby exploded.

"He hijacked our reception!" She shrieked. "He did that... that thing where he glows and does that stupid charm thing with his eyes and next thing you know everyone was making out!"

Sapphire blushed. "We all did things we weren't proud of that night."

Jasper scowled. "Bismuth and I had an encounter too, seeing as we were made to be his."

Made to be his? Like... bred specifically for him to keep and use as things? Were Pearl and Spinel made to be his things? Is that why they were so comfortably being objectified?

My knees buckled and Bismuth caught me again. "Steven Universe started out weak and fumbling around for meaning, and now his voice can pull things out like he's sifting through a bowl of candy. Most people associate him with his singing, but that's not the worst part. The way he puts you under a spell and bends your mind to fit his needs like a piece of paper is the worst part."

Bismuth pushed me and I landed on my knees in front of Lapis.

"He's the smallest Diamond, but his seven foot frame is no laughing matter. When he sings to you, it all fades to pink." Lapis said seriously and they hummed in agreement. "He creates more whenever he needs a new fix. If these guys are lucky, they won't be missed. His tastes are fickle, that's his human side. The rest is shiny, rock hard Diamond wanting to see if you'll poof when you're squeezed."

Garnet smirked. "Steven Universe once fucked us so hard we both poofed. Honeymoon jitters had us finding ourselves searching for meaning."

He what?!

"Steven Universe shattered me in a fit of rage and brought me back. He seems incredibly nice, but it comes at a nasty price if you disobey." Jasper nudged Hessonite who'd been staring down at her nails disinterestedly.

So, he essentially murdered her. But then he brought her back to life. He could heal death?!

"Steven Universe corrupted me so greatly, he's all I can think about. On Homeworld, I'm under strict orders by Yellow Diamond, Amber, to not make any more contact until the pink seeps out of my gem." She brushed the bangs on her forehead aside to reveal her gem, coral in color. "It's supposed to be orange."

Obsessed? Why? What was so great about him that made them obsessed? Or was it more than that?

Peridot shot up, outraged, "Steven Universe stole the love of my life just to prove to me he could!"

The room fell silent and everyone gawked at her outburst. She sat down and dropped her head into her hands. Lapis looked uncomfortable behind the heavy blush and turned away.

"Don't be fooled by the pink, don't be fooled by way he touches you or treats you," Alex sighed. "He is taking you under his wing for reasons an innocent girl like you couldn't understand."

Lapis scoffed. "Have you seen the way people look at him? He could convince a cow to walk into a meat grinder."

"Every person in school is aware of his stare, but he doesn't just give it to anybody. Half of us are completely invisible to him. The other 49% are merely the ones who worship him a bit harder. They're all terrified of him, and they should be. He's a lion, and Pearl and Spinel are apart of his Pride. And now, you are too."

Bismuth sighed. "He's an uppercrust if I ever saw one, but he doesn't do shows of power so he comes off more human than he really is. That's his catch... you don't know how powerful he is until it's too late."

I pushed myself up to my feet, face tight with determination. "I-I have to take him out."

A room full of downcast faces grinned at me, and I felt like a brand new woman.

"She's ready," Peridot whispered.

*

I cried the entire way home.

Not a lot, but enough.

Steven Universe was the most ambiguous creature I'd ever met, and I didn't know how I could make someone like that fall in love with someone like me.

He was too methodical. He was too well rounded, and with Pearl and Spinel to even some of his sharper parts out, they felt like an unstoppable force that I was standing in the way of with my tiny body.

When he smiled at me, my heart raced.

When he got close my breathing stuttered to a stop.

How could someone be so malicious, and yet so sweet? It was contradictory, and I couldn't find any way to analyze him that didn't make me feel worse about it.

I'd said I'd take him out, but how do you take out an all powerful half alien hottie?

"You make him fall in love with you," I answered aloud.