"Have you learned nothing?"

The goddess's reprimand evoked memories of her godmother's stern admonishments. Each word was delivered with a cutting edge, causing Yaling to flinch involuntarily.

"You and your precious crown prince will die your last deaths tonight if you choose to continue on this path. I cannot help you beyond this, Wei Yaling."

Me and the crown prince? But, he was alive—

"That's what you heard? Yes, the crown prince. He's someone who could help shape the world into a better place. I implore you. Not just for your sake, but for the sake of the country. Zhou Yuze. He is the answer... I hope I don't see you for a long time."

Wait!

Yaling stirred from her sleep at chǒu shí­ (one to three in the morning), much earlier than before. As she struggled to open her eyes, she felt the weight of the despair that had been haunting her at the goddess's revelation. Tears continued to spill over as she lay in bed, the darkness of the room enveloping her.

As she finally roused herself, she made her way to the water tank, hoping that splashing her face with water would wash away the relentless ache in her heart. It was there that she unexpectedly encountered the second prince.

"Zhou Yuze?" she called out, her voice barely above a whisper.

The second prince seemed taken aback by her presence, and he hesitantly offered a greeting before preparing to depart. Yaling realized that they hadn't spoken in this lifetime, but she had to stop him quickly, or else this opportunity would be wasted.

Before she could gather her thoughts, he paused and extended his handkerchief toward her, a silent gesture that spoke volumes.

"He's a good person, you know. He'll treat you well. If that's what you're worrying about."

She couldn't help but let out a laugh, despite the tears still streaming down her face. It was a mixture of emotions, and she found herself laughing until the second prince joined in. Just when she thought she had stopped, he made a witty remark, saying, "Of course, I'm not bad either," which caused her to burst into another fit of laughter.

"Do you know that we met once? I'm Zhou Yuze."

She searched her memory. "The city market?" she asked at the same he said, "When we were kids."

"Ah, yes. We recently met there too. I wasn't as impressionable before so it's completely understandable if you don't recall."

"You mean to say that you're impressionable now?"

"Aren't I? You remembered the market. I think you were looking at some pouches that day. But you didn't get any."

"Mm." She had to rely on his memory for that. It was at the bustling city market where she had caught sight of the crown prince masquerading as a common scholar. His acts of kindness and genuine care for the citizens were devoid of grandiosity, which made her admiration for him flourish to the extent that she could scarcely recall if the second prince had even been present.

"Nothing caught your eye? I happened to pick up an extra one. The vendor was persistent."

The vendor was a frail elderly woman who painstakingly crafted embroidered pouches to provide for her orphaned grandchildren. She was so advanced in years that she lacked the energy to be assertive. Yaling wanted to help her business as well, but she'd already emptied the contents of her purse to some refugees.

"So...this is for you."

"Thank you."

"Not at all. It's an extra one, remember?"

Then, how come it was exactly the one she had her eye on?

"Right. Then, this is for you."

"Did you embroider this yourself?"

"Yes."

"It's incredible. I'm not sure I should accept this, but now that it's in my hands, I can't bear to part with it, even if you change your mind later."

"I won't."

"Good. Thank you."

Their conversation carried on like a poorly wrapped gift. Although she was never one to judge a book by its cover, she truly did not expect to find a treasure once the gift was unwrapped. She couldn't help but be disappointed when just before the sun rose, they heard footsteps likely belonging to the palace maids who would prepare her for the wedding.

"Should I tell you a secret? Something that no one else alive knows."

"How ominous."

"Generous, you mean. You've invited me in for a look but kept heavy guard of your secrets. Whereas I'm about to lay myself bare to you."

"Oh."

"Oh? Is that all you have to say?"

"I should say that you shouldn't. But I'm curious enough to court death, so go ahead."

"I like you."

Silence and then, was that sounding drums or the beat of her heart?

"Forgive me. I was too forward. It's just that tonight..." he hesitated. "If you're not keen on marrying him, or marrying at all, I wanted you to know that I care about you. I really do. And I'd do anything to see you happy. We could tuck you into the bridal carriage for a nap. When you wake up, you could be far away from the city. Wouldn't it be thrilling to go on an adventure? The first of many."

A nap? If there's a sedative instead of poison in her wine, then it'll be another death by dagger. He was supposed to be the key. Why hasn't anything changed?

The arrival of palace maids provided a welcome distraction, allowing her to avoid further discussion with the second prince. She carefully avoided the topic of her nightmares with her godmother and sequestered herself in her room, unlike all the other days.

In the afternoon, she couldn't stop herself from meeting the crown prince in his hiding spot. She was convinced by his words last night that he didn't—couldn't, wouldn't—form an attachment with her, so why avoid him? It would be the last time that they'd share a space and time even if it's only for her memories.

Or so she thought.

Not long after she returned to her room, the crown prince visited her secretly.

"Forgive the intrusion, Lady Wei."

"No. Forgive me for being rude just now, Your Highness."

"You know who I am based on my voice?"

"You seem to know mine as well."

"Yes, well, then, I need to ask. Is the poem you recited about me?"

"The poem was about love that you cannot have. Because love is a luxury that even the richest and most powerful cannot afford. Would this be about you, Your Highness?"

"If not me, then, will you be kind enough to let me know who the poem is about?"

Zhou Yuze. He is the answer. When the crown prince asks you—that is the only time you have the power to change your fate.

"Zhou Yuze." She couldn't bring herself to utter anything beyond the name of the second prince. Didn't the goddess also do the same?

"I see. I'm sorry for having troubled you. I shall arrange matters properly to make up for the inconvenience."

Was it just her, or did he sound disappointed with her answer?

"Thank you for your grace, Your Highness."

Blood red orange lined the sky atop the palace roofs, reminding Yaling of the red decorations in the bridal chamber. Looking toward Kunning Palace, she allowed her heart to ache with regret and longing for the crown prince.

It would be the last time that she allowed this kind of self-indulgence until many, many years later. When the crown prince had long become the emperor and his son, the reigning crown prince, was to wed in a few months, she happened upon him looking in at Kunning Palace.

Their eyes met as they walked toward each other, stopping near the area where she had drawn her last breath in his embrace all those years ago.

"You are truly gracious, Your Majesty," she spoke first. "But what if the crown prince chooses to marry someone ineligible? The royal family marriages have been meant to strengthen and serve the country. What i"

"I think it's equally important to let our family seize the opportunity to be with the one that they love." Turning to gaze at the bridal chamber entrance, he added, "Otherwise, all we'll be left with is a lifetime of regret. What do you think?"

He lowered his head and chuckled softly as he spoke. "What am I saying to you, of all people? If you think about it, this tradition started with you and my brother. Back then, I was the one who helped bring you two together. I played a key role in both of you finding your happiness. Did you know that? All I wanted was for you to be happy."

As his words lingered in the air, she felt a weighty silence settle between them. Later, as he turned away and walked off, she found herself whispering to his retreating figure, "That's all I want as well."