I was too weak to fight the medics as they took me back to camp and examined me in the hospital tent. They tied me down to the bed and began digging into my side without giving me a sedative. I didn't have the strength to scream. I moaned and groaned, but not because of the physical pain. I expressed the pain I was feeling inwardly. The emotional pain! I am convinced that the inward pain is what caused me to black out, and not the pain from the surgeon's scalpel.

The next day I woke up even weaker than the day before. I stayed in the hospital part of camp. The place I'd been avoiding for the past two months. The place Mike wanted me to be. It seemed that no matter how hard I tried to do things my way, Mike always ended up getting his way in the end.

The doctor who was operating on me, of course, discovered the gonorrhea and when I woke up from the anesthetic he told me he'd issued me a medical release home.

I cried that night. I'd lost a good friend and received news of going home on the same day. What a shitty day! I couldn't imagine anything worse!

Anyways, the next morning Micky came by and told me what had happened to him after Mike's death. He was a mess as he laid out all his fear and sadness and anger. When he was finished I told him mine.

He seemed sympathetic but I couldn't help wondering if he was really sorry I was leaving. He and Mike had been pushing me to get sent home for weeks.

"When are you leaving?" He asked.

"Three days from now." I said weakly. I was too tired to even move.

"Do uh, do they think you'll..." Micky wouldn't look at me as he asked the question about how bad sick I was.

"Do they think I'll survive that long?" I asked for him. Micky nodded.

"I'm not sure. I don't." I said and closed my weary eyes.

"Hey, Davy, before you go to sleep, where is Peter?" Micky asked me with a world of sadness in his tone.

"Morgue." I whispered before falling asleep.

Peter

Micky poked his head in the door.

"What are you doing here?" He asked.

I didn't answer him. I just kept stroking Mike's coarse hair as I stared intently at his face.

"Oh man..." Micky sighed as he took a seat beside me.

"Mike why?" He asked.

Inside, I became angry at Mick for coming. Why was he here? He wasn't Mike's best friend. He'd only known him for six months or so. I'd known him for years. He was my best friend.

"Get out..." I said in a soft growl. It caught Micky off guard.

"Ex—Excuse me?" He asked shocked.

"Get out!" I screamed in his face. Micky fell backwards out of his chair and ran out of the room. 

"I'm sorry you had to see that Mike." I spoke to my friend. "I promise I'll stop him from coming. I know it upsets you..." I trailed. I could feel my sanity slipping. I actually welcomed it. If I could go insane, I could go home.

"Take it!" I said to the sky. "Take my mind!"