Jimmy felt so lost in his own mind that when a hand tapped his shoulder, he violently flinched.

Turning, Coral was standing there, concern in her intelligent gaze. She had a frown on her face, one that Jimmy remembered from his childhood. "Are you okay?" She asked back then, comforting him the night after Grian left.

Now, it was different.

"Are you alright?" She asked, not thinking about how much he missed his older brother but because she had seen the longing look Jimmy had on his face.

He sent her a grateful smile, putting his hand over hers that still rested against his shoulder.

"Yes," he whispered back, letting her hand go to instead cross the room.

Everyone seemed to turn to him.

They watched as he walked down the stairs and glided across the room to his family. All eyes on him. The crowd parted for him and the cheers murmered down to a whisper.

"Is he supposed to be playing like that?" "Do we clap for him?" "Why does the music sound like that?" The crowd echoed, the same as that performance a few years ago.

"He doesn't know hardwork if it hit him!" Shouted Lizzie just days ago down the hall.

"A king doesn't dwaddle, he stands tall. You are just a pathetic prince." His mother scolded, holding a whip during the late hours.

"He's too young and naive to know." Grian said behind his back.

The same brother that was now staring at him like he was unrecognizable.

Lizzie whispered something, the king and queen scolded her but Grian just stared at him. He didn't say anything as Jimmy came up the stairs.

And then, he stopped.

He was seven feet away from his family and just stayed put.

The whole ballroom was in silence.

Jimmy wanted to do something. Whether it be blaming his brother on everything bad happening in his life, punching him for leaving in the first place or break down in the middle of the party.

Grian stepped forward away from the family, his perfect smile slipping onto his perfect face.

"I missed you." His voice was different that Jimmy had heard years ago. It wasn't the one that sang songs with Jimmy in the family room or read stories before he would go to bed. It was still so goddamn perfect.

"I missed you too." Was the only thing that he could whisper, cringing at how stupid his voice was in comparison.

And that seemed to be what everyone wanted.

Grian pulled him in for a hug. A perfect hug that made Jimmy melt no matter how much his body ached. No matter how much he wanted to pull away and shove Grian down the stairs. No matter how much he wanted to flinch away and cry because his scars ached and he hadn't touched anyone in months besides someone putting their hand on his shoulder. He was touchstarved but it burned his soul.

Grian pulled away, smiling down at Jimmy. It seemed to fall slightly at the sight of his face.

How ugly does Jimmy have to be for his perfect brother to cringe away from him.

His perfect smile slipped back onto his face ans he turned Jimmy around to face the crowd. An arm around his shoulder as Grian waved to the cheering crowd.

And they adored him.

Younger people swooned at him, some cupping their hands in hearts, sending them their way. Others clapped and cried. But not because of Jimmy.

But because of his brother.

The beloved prince, the first born that had everyone excited when he was first announced. Parades would go down the streets when it was his birthday and even after he left, there were festivals in his honor throughout the years. He was the prince that was going to change the country. People wanted him more than they wanted the actual queen and king. They thought he was going to do something great, do something special just for them.

Because he was the true perfect prince. The model for how his mother tried to beat Jimmy into. It didn't fit; Grian's mold was large and perfect. Jimmy came out deformed and small. Anyone could do his job but nobody would even attempt to do Grian's.

And if it didn't hurt, Grian had to go and steak a knife into his heart.

"No, no, tonight is my brother's night! My pride and joy of a little brother deserves all the applause!" Grian announced in his loud voice. He didn't need a microphone for everyone to hear what he had to say.

And the crowd listened.

They wouldn't clap and cheer when he was getting ready for his speech. They looked bored out of their minds. But for their prince?

They clapped and screamed Jimmy's name. They praised him but it was half hearted. They were only doing it for Grian's sake.

Jimmy wanted to be buried alive.

But despite his internal struggle, he smiled and waved like the far from perfect prince he was. Distantly, he could see a painter, painting the royal family.

The painter that was supposed to paint him during his speech.

Now, he was being painted with his fake smile and wave, knowing that the painting was going to be entitled "Our Prince's Return" because that was all this was to everybody.

He felt sick to his stomach.

He was longing for a home he didn't have. He was reaching out to it with both hands. Jimmy knew there was no point, it wasn't going to come. He wanted to scream the voices in his head away, wanted to silence the crowd, he wanted to call for his home despite being there already.

"I WANT TO GO HOME!" He wanted to scream at the top of his lungs until his heart gave out.

But alas, he was sent back to his own body.

It must have been awhile, the party was in full swing and the painter was walking to them with the finished product.

The worst part was that he was right.

Standing in the middle of the portrait was Grian, perfect smile as he waved for the crowd. To his side was Jimmy, curled up slightly and a sick look on his face despite the smile. On Grian's other side, Lizzie stood in her radiance, waving and curtsying for the crowd. Their parents were nowhere to be seen.

Turning, Jimmy saw his parents arguing on the outside of the balcony. They were fighting.

No, he didn't want to be buried alive.

He already was.

(Big sad Timmy)