I can't breathe.

My heart feels like it's going to explode as I gulp the air around me. I can't will my lungs to expand as my teeth clatter and my body trembles like a fucking tambourine. Walls close in. My vision fades at the edges. My knees begin to give out.

Arms. Warm, strong arms around me. I lean into them, bury my face in the chest that presses to me. I scream at the top of my lungs but no sound comes out. A hand strokes the back of my head. A mouth presses to its crown.

I don't know how long I spend in Elijah's arms, but he holds me all the while. Until I can breathe again. Until I can open my eyes enough to see. Until I wrap my arms around him.

"Hey," he whispers, lifting my chin to him. "What did I tell you in my car?"

I don't know. I don't remember. I can't think of anything other than that most of my life has been a lie.

"That we'll get through this together," he says. "You're not alone, Sienna. You never will be again. Not as long as you have us. Not as long as you have me."

"What—" I sob as hot tears run down my cheeks. "What does that m-mean? What i-is my f-father—?"

"I don't know," his smile as he thumbs my tears is pained. "But we'll figure it out. I swear to you on my soul, we'll get to the bottom of this. Okay?"

I press my face to his chest again as I squeeze his torso like I'm drowning and he's my rescue buoy because he might as well be. I can hear his heart beating fast as he holds me tight and I burrow in his shirt like a wild rabbit in the hole it calls home.

My mom.

That was my mom out there.

My brain's instant response is to go into denial. It can't be her. She's been dead for years and years. I was at her funeral. My dad was so devastated by her death that he burned everything she had. That he—

My spine snaps straight as I stare at Elijah, feeling something bloom in my brain.

"What?" He asks.

"I think my father's behind this," I say, the calm of my voice telling me I'm confident in my theory. At Elijah's frown, I continue, "Remember I told you he destroyed everything she owned when she died?"

He nods.

"I don't think it was because he couldn't bear losing her. I think it's because he faked her death. Elijah, I think he might be holding her somewhere."

"That's not a bad theory," he says. "We'll discuss it tomorrow."

"That's the day of the gala," I step away from him. "He will be there. There's no time, Elijah. We need to come up with a plan, we—"

"Sienna, we don't know what's going on. All you have is a theory."

"What else could it be?"

"A million other things. You know Russian. Did that sound like a woman trapped to you? If he's holding her somewhere, why did he give her a phone?"

That gives me pause before I barrel through.

"Is there a rulebook for how trapped women should sound like?" I put my hands on my hips. "And maybe the phone is rigged to only receive calls from specific numbers or something. Maybe it's the way he contacts her. Maybe that's why Imari can't track it."

"Okay," he crosses his arms. "Then how do you explain Kaen's mother?"

I freeze with my mouth open, watching the holes in my theory reveal themselves and scrabbling for anything to plug them with.

"Maybe she lied," I say. "Maybe she does work for my father. Maybe she's in on him with this. Maybe—"

"'Maybe' isn't good enough, Sienna," he uncrosses his arms and takes a step towards me, holding my hand in his. "We can't operate on 'maybe's. You know that and you'd see it if you just take a break. You're overwhelmed, we all are, but you especially. We have time tomorrow before the gala so let's just look at the situation with clear minds. Okay?"

"But, Elijah," I whisper as I feel tears making their way up to my eyes again, knowing that he's right. "If it's not that, then..."

"Don't think like that."

"But—"

"Hey," he cups the back of my skull and looks at me levelly. "We. Don't. Know. Okay? Don't jump to any conclusions. Don't start going down roads that go plummeting to hell. Don't think about this. Do something to distract yourself. Go to sleep, get some air, do something until your head clears up. And we will talk about it tomorrow, okay?"

I nod, looking down. Again, he's right. He's always fucking right.

"I can ask Valerie and Imari to come see you," he says. "Would you like that?"

"Please," I tell him, knowing that they would've come to me anyway. "Tell them I'll be in my room."

"I'll walk you there," he takes my hand.

"I know the way."

"Sienna," he looks at me with a plea in his blue eyes. "Please let me walk you there."

And how can I refuse him?

As we walk, he tells me stories about all the artwork we see. That abstract blob statue in the corner was based on Tiago's encounter with a mobster from Sicily. Ugly-looking motherfucker, but a great guy apparently. Some paintings were based on classical Renaissance work, like the one under which Tiago and Val found me and Jesse kissing. Titan's work.

"You talk about your brothers like you're a proud parent," I tell him. Then, thinking that's weird considering they're all technically dating me, say, "Well, maybe like a proud older brother. Which you are. Kind of."

As if that's any less weird. They're not actual brothers, at least.

He chuckles. "I suppose I am."

I let a silence settle as we approach my room.

"Don't be mad at Kaen," I say as we stand before my door. "I saw how you looked at him. I don't think he meant to hurt me and he needs you right now. All of you guys."

His chest rises as he breathes in and nods. I smile at him and he smiles back, that dimple making an appearance. Then I stand on my tip-toes to reach his mouth. When our lips touch, I feel the rush of butterflies in my stomach and the ripple of goosebumps on my skin. For one blissful moment, everything is okay.

"Thank you," I say as I pull away. "For everything."

His smile doesn't falter as he shakes his head, but his eyes turn solid, determined.

"I'd do anything for you, Sienna," he says before kissing my forehead.

And I believe him. The warm blanket those words envelop me in is unlike any that I've slept under.

"Your friends will be here soon," he says as he lets me go. "Tell me if you need anything?"

"I will," I say, opening my door. "See you soon, Elijah."

"See you soon," he winks—the first time I've ever seen him do that—and disappears around the corner.

I'm still thinking about what his lips felt like when Valerie and Imari burst in. She's double-fisting two bottles of wine and Imari is holding three glasses.

"I don't wanna talk about it," I say as they crush me in a hug. "I'm on strict orders to distract myself."

"Good," Valerie says as they let me go. "Because we have a lot to catch up on. You've slept with, what? Three out of five of them and told us jack shit?"

"That's right," says Imari, twisting open the Rosé, "I've always wanted to know if Jesse's got a bigger dick than Gage."

"You're disgusting," I say as I nod at Val's gesture at the bottle of Red. "And yes, it is. Barely, though."

Valerie holds out her hand to him and Imari rolls his eyes, dropping a fifty into it.

"You're the only reason I still carry cash," he says. "Just to fucking lose it."

"What can I say?" She says as she uncorks the bottle and begins pouring. "I'm just that good."

"I might be wrong, honestly," I accept my glass. "They're both pretty huge. I just say Jesse because—"

"Because you tried deep-throating him?" Imari says.

I frown. "How did you know?"

"Experience, baby. Been there, done that."

The Weeknd's Tell Your Friends plays through the speakers as Valerie adjusts the volume to a good background sound before holding out her glass to us.

"Well, to experience," she says. "And to spilling all the tea."

I roll my eyes as we click our glasses together and sip. The warmth of the drink complements the warmth Elijah stirred in me earlier and is joined by the warmth these two envelop me in. I can't imagine my life without them, I realize. I'm incomplete without them by my side, without moments like these. And nothing, not even the knowledge of my mother being alive this whole time, can take that away from me.

So I tell them everything they've missed. It doesn't pass me by that Valerie flushes when I talk about sex with the boys, especially when I get to Kaen's part. She even clenches her thighs at some of the things I tell her.

What is she to me, exactly? My girlfriend? We've been best friends my whole life and our bond doesn't feel any different. Sure, we're more open about our feelings, but I attribute this to a lack of awareness on my part rather than anything actually changing between us. She's just always been a part of me. She's just... Val.

"Okay, you two need to get a fucking room," says Imari as he finishes his glass. "I think I'll—"

"No," we both snap at him.

"You're staying here." I point to the floor. "Nothing between us is changing, alright? You're a part of this. If we're being too overt for your catholic schoolboy ass, fucking tell us. Got it?"

He looks at Valerie and she nods. He rolls his eyes.

"And I was hoping to have some room to breathe," he sighs too loudly as he pours himself another glass. "Alas, I shall get drunk with my horny dykes instead."

"And he was telling me not to make him the third wheel," Valerie says.

"Oh!" I snap my fingers and squat to retrieve Elijah's box from under the bed. "I almost forgot."

I tell them all about it as I bring it out. Valerie crosses her legs and stares at it like it's the holy grail.

"So what do you think it is?" She asks.

"I don't know," I shrug. "It's light so probably some clothing? Lingerie?"

"Bondage ropes," Imari, sips his wine, "calling it."

"I think that's more Kaen's style," I chuckle.

"How do you know?" He raises an eyebrow. "You haven't fucked Elijah yet."

"And you haven't fucked your man yet," I counter.

His face falls as he glares at Valerie.

"Oh, give it a rest," she says. "Of course I told her."

"And the fact that you weren't going to do that yourself frankly offends me," I put the box away and sit beside her. Imari frowns at us like we're two annoying kids who keep asking him to play with us.

"Well?" I urge, sipping my wine, "At least tell us his name."

He sighs, swallowing his Rosé as he leans at the corner of my desk. "It's Lucas."

"Oh?" Valerie perks up and pulls a phone out of her pocket. Unlocking it, she shows Imari the number on the screen with the face of a very attractive blond man. "You mean this Lucas?"

My mouth drops along with Imari's. He puts his glass down and pats his jeans, hands finding nothing.

"Is that my phone?" He snaps at Valerie. "How did you—?"

"You're very good with computers, babe, but not with spotting sleight of hand," she smirks. "Your laptop wasn't hard to steal either. Caller ID did the rest."

Imari's complexion doesn't lend itself to blushing easily, yet he goes red as a beet.

"I've never been more attracted to you," I tell Valerie.

She winks. "I know."

"Okay, ha ha, you're hilarious," Imari says, advancing on her with an outstretched hand. "Hand it over."

She snatches her hand back, keeping him out of reach.

"I don't think so, Tiger," she says, keeping him back with her feet.

"I'm serious, Valerie, give it back," he smacks her legs away but she just scoots farther up the bed. "Valerie!"

He climbs onto the bed to get to her, but I'm on him in seconds, hooking his arms from behind and placing my knee on his back, toppling him to the mattress.

"Sienna, stop!" He yells while Valerie giggles and presses the phone to her ear, backing away toward the window.

"No," He says, "Valerie, don't—!"

"Hi, is this Lucas?" Her voice jumps an octave, sounding like an innocent child.

'British' she mouths to me with an expression I can only describe as curiously flustered. I feel Imari hold his breath and watch him pale.

"My name is Valerie," she says into the phone. "I'm Imari's friend. It's actually his number I'm calling you from."

Imari steps on my toe. I swallow a curse and instinctively let him go. He jumps at Valerie but she easily ducks out of his way.

"Yeah, I'm sorry he couldn't call earlier," she holds back Imari's head as his hands paw at her face. "He was a little busy."

I give Imari a taste of his own medicine and bring my heel to his toe. He jerks back, letting Valerie run to the other end of the room while I hold him back.

"But, hey, now you have his number and you can call him any time," she smirks at Imari, then her eyebrows fly up her forehead. "What's that...? Can he talk now?"

Imari's eyes go wide as dinner plates, his pallor quickly turning to that beet-red flush from earlier. He shakes his head so aggressively at her that a part of me is scared it'll fall off. 'No,' he mouths as he shakes it. 'No, no, no, no—'

"Of course he can! Here let me just get him," she comes up to us. I let Imari go. He snatches the phone like a pissed-off cheerleader snatching her favourite ribbon and glares at us both in turn. Still, he brings the phone to his ear, takes a deep breath, and clears his throat.

"Hi," he says, breathing. "Sorry. My friends can be... a lot."

"We love you!" Valerie yells, earning another glare from Imari.

"What?" He goes redder. "No, I don't think I can right—"

"Yes, you can!" Valerie yells and shoves Imari's glass of Rosé into his free hand. "Have fun, don't do anything I wouldn't do!"

"That's not much," says Imari as she pushes him towards my door. "No, don't call her funny, you're enabling her."

"Oooh, Lucas thinks I'm funny!" She sings teasingly as she opens the door and pushes him out. "I think I like him more than you."

Imari narrows his eyes at her. "Don't you fucking dare—"

"Bye!" And she shuts the door right in his face. Pressing her ear to it, she listens for a moment.

"Damn, I can't hear anything," she complains as she pulls away. "Did they have to soundproof this place?"

"If you wanted to hear, why'd you send him out?" I come up behind her and wrap my arms around hers, resting my chin on her shoulder. "It's not like he was gonna stick around in the hallway."

She leans into me, letting me smell her blackberry and vanilla perfume. It engulfs me, making my blood rush, warming me all over.

"I just wanted to know if he hung up," she says. "He better not."

"He wouldn't," I kiss her shoulder, brushing my lips toward her neck. Her skin feels like silk under them, the goosebumps they leave in their wake making me clutch her tighter, making my own goosebumps rise. "He's wanted this for longer than he cares to admit."

"Has he?" She turns to me, pressing her forehead to mine.

"Mhm," I hum, making our lips meet. Her tongue brushes against mine like they're two lovers ensnared. Her hands climb up the back of my neck and fist my hair. My hands pull her into me as I back away with her on my lips. My calves hit my bed. I let her push me onto it, landing on my back with her chuckling above me. A fire starts between my legs and I become acutely aware of her breasts pressed to mine, her thigh rubbing against mine, and her hand snaking under me and grabbing my ass.

"You're not subtle at all," she purrs.

"I never tried to be," I smile.

She smiles back but, as I reach for her mouth again, her smile falls and she pulls back.

"What's wrong?" I ask as I see her throat bob.

"There's..." she breathes. "Sienna, there's something you need to know."

Those words, the way she says them, the way she looks, all make me feel like I've been doused in cold water. I sit up and cross my legs as she moves off of me and does the same. I look into her eyes, seeing the fear and guilt in them. My heart sinks.

"What is it, Val?" I ask, knowing that there's probably nothing she could do that will make me love her any less. And definitely nothing that she would do. "You can tell me anything."

She breathes again, long and slow.

"Well," she begins. "We were fighting and... and I wasn't having a great time. No, don't apologize again, please, that's not— no."

"Look, I just—" She takes a third deep breath, then the word vomit comes. "I know you wouldn't mind but I'm still scared to ask because I love you and I don't want this to be just another one of our flings with someone else and I don't know if he feels the same and—"

"Valerie," I take her hand in mine and look into her eyes. Her chest rises and falls rapidly and her eyes glisten in the dim light of my room.

"Just say it," I breathe. "Is it one of the boys? Do you want...?"

I trail off as it hits me. I feel my eyes bulge and my jaw slacken as my grip on her hand relaxes.

"It's Tiago," she blurts out. "But—but you don't have to agree to anything, okay? It's probably just my stupid imagination in the stupid state I was in and he's always been yours like them and I don't even know if he wants to do this or if he feels anything for me and—"

I grab her shoulders and look her square in the face.

"Val," I tell her as she bites her lips. I smile, feeling like I just swallowed a radiator. "He does."

Her face falls as her eyes widen. The same look as when I told her I loved her. "What?"

I laugh, shaking her slightly. "He does, Valerie! Holy shit. And I was thinking who on earth would he want to hide from me. Turns out it was you?"

I laugh again as she only looks more confused.

"Yesterday at the cottage," I explain, "When we were left alone. I deduced there was someone else and he as much as admitted it. I told him I don't mind as long as I know, but he wouldn't tell me who it is."

I look at her perplexed eyes, my smile widening to the point of pain, my heart fluttering like a bird.

"Because it was you!" I yell and jump in my seat. "Val, of course I don't mind! I'd share the whole fucking world with you! What are you talking about? Oh my fucking God, it's you!"

Her smile finally appears.

"But, uhm..." she says, voice shaking. "This is different. The three of us—"

"Oh, no!" I cry, lacing my voice with as much sarcasm as I can muster. "We'll be in a throuple? What EVER will we do? Have sex TOGETHER?! Oh yeah, that turns me right the fuck off for sure. Oh, that would be—"

"Okay!" She laughs, showing me her palms. "Okay, I get it. Point taken."

"Val," My shoulders sag as I put my hand to her face. "You know that I'll die before I let a boy come between us, right? Even if it's one of them."

She bites her lip, making the heat rise in me again.

"But why not?" She asks. "Could be hot... other positions, too..."

My smile darkens into something sinister as I drag my hand away from her face, letting it fall down her neck, past her breast, and land between her legs. She scooches closer, rubbing against it.

"You sound like you have something in mind," I say.

"I might," she caresses my torso with her fingers, resting her hand on one of my breasts. "I think we should check on him. He's been very grouchy today."

"You think he needs help relaxing?"

She smirks. "Most certainly."

She presses her lips to mine, breathing me in. Moaning, she dry humps my hand and snakes her hand into my bra. Her tongue eagerly laps at the inside of my mouth, and she pulls a moan like the sweetest melody from my lips when she bites them.

"Let's go then," I say when she releases me. "We don't wanna keep him waiting."