Star pov
After Marco dropped me off I was losing my balance again. As i made it towards the living room I fell to my knees and started screaming..my legs...I couldn't feel them it felt like a truck ran over them "Mom! Dad!" As I tried getting up I couldn't and I fell into darkness.

When I woke up I was in the hospital bed again and I sigh, this wasn't anything new. I sat up and looked to the side to see the outside "Star how you feeling?" I shrugged before I touched my head "Why do I have a wrap around my head?" "You cut your head when you fell? How are you legs honey?" I could move them but they won't last long

"I feel them.." mother kissed my head before walking out to speak with doctors. I checked my phone and saw texts from the group, they seemed worried..I don't want them to worry because I'm fine..but really? I'm not okay...

As the day turned to night I had to stay a couple days in the hospital in case something happens again but I doubt it..it's been 4 months and Marco has seen me fall to my knees a couple times but I always play it off as I'm tired and he nods without questioning..I couldn't believe Janna acted that way?

I thought she was nice but I guess to certain people especially Marco..maybe I'm intruding on their friendship even though Marco said he doesn't like her like that which I could believe because I know he likes me but I play it off. I smile thinking about Marco and then my vision blurs as hot tears roll down my flushed cheeks

"I don't want to get attached.." as I wiped my eyes I heard a familiar voice "She's in there" as I look I see a worried Marco with red eyes and looked as his world is crashing down "Hey.." I said as he slowly walked towards me and the bed "Please tell me your fine and not dying?" I chuckled as looked at him "I'm fine Marco just passed out that's all.."

I wanted to tell him the truth but how could I if I don't want him to be hung up on me "Star...I don't want secrets between us, friends shouldn't keep secrets from each other..please tell me?" He held my hand and I blushed at the sudden contact that I moved my hand away "Why would I tell you anything? Your not close with me" the look in his eyes made me feel like a turd

"So that's it? Since we're not close you can't tell me? What if something happens and I don't know and you and up dead? What then star? Who's going to tell me your parents?" I started shaking as I grabbed my sheets "Marco I don't want to get attached to you.." I whispered the last part that he didn't understand 

"What?" "I have Efferent, it's a condition that deals with my motor as in standing and holding myself up, sometimes I can't grasp with my hands...i" I started crying and Marco sat beside me and held me tightly "Hey it's okay" I push him away "Its not okay! Marco you don't understand! I've been dealing with this on my own..it hurts me it physically hurts me"

I looked at Marco who held a neutral look "You can go..I'm fine" I looked away from him but I could still feel those mocha eyes on me "Is it treatable?" He mustered up, as i look at him with blur vision "What?" He scooted closer to me which made me blush "Is it treatable? Your condition?" I shrugged and lowered my head

"It is..but" I didn't even want to look at him because of I did I just cry again "But?" He asked trying to get me look at him "I'm done talking Marco..please stop asking me" I said and he nods "Alright..just know I'm here also the rest of us as well" he gave me a sweet tender smile and I felt my heart skip a beat

"Thanks..I guess my date with oskar won't be happening" I giggled as Marco just pulled me into a hug which startled me, his breathing picked up and I could feel his heart beat loud "Marco?" He held tighter and I hugged back "Just relax and keep your head up.." I smiled and dug my head into his chest while he soothed my back "Thanks"

After Marco visited I wasn't really out of the hospital, they kept me for test and asked me for the surgery since I was a little older but I still put it aside for the time being. "So, since your here I decided to bring the date here" I smiled as Oskar came in with a back from the Malt shop, he handed me treats and my favorite milkshake

"That's awfully sweet, sorry I couldn't go with you to that concert" he shakes his head "Hey, your more important than any old concert..besides I've seen them a bunch of times" we laugh as we eat. Talking with him felt more like a friendship then an actually relationship...with Marco he made me feel nervous, and the little smirks he always gave me while I scold him or get on his side

"Hey? You okay your just staring out the window" I blush and nod "Yeah I'm fine..just keeping my head up" he nods "How long are you in here for?" I shrugged "Depends..how I'm feeling and if I can actually stand for more than a couple hours" he nods and holds my hand "Hey, if you need anyone I'm here for you and the rest of us" I smiled and moved my hand away from his, it didn't feel the same as Marcos touch.

"Thanks.." he smiles and continues eating but I just couldn't..my mind was telling me 'Call Marco' 'You love Marco' but I couldn't not yet anyway? He still believes I like Oskar but I don't really see myself with a guy like Oskar..I bet he means well but he's not Marco.

Throughout the night in that cold, lonely hospital room I managed to walk towards the window and look up at the stars..just looking at them made me feel better and relaxed and away from all of this..like i was up there with them..but I have to face facts..I'm not gonna live forever like I hoped