Me and Philip were walking uptown. I never knew how quiet it was uptown, Rebecca would like it uptown. She liked the quiet. We might move uptown, I like the quiet too, Philip could use the time, he needs to relax. 

Eliza spends a lot of time with us. Especially with the kids. I mean I'm grateful and all but I think she's trying to make it personal. Especially with John C. off at war, just because Father didn't get a letter from Great Britain and he declared war. Why is my family so stupid? 

I walked into my bedroom and just sat there and cried. I cried a lot. A lot more than I usually do. I cried as much as I cried when I found out about Rebecca. I miss my daughters smile and laugh, I miss singing lullabies to get her to go to sleep, and she didn't even care if I could sing or not. I love her. And I miss her so much. 

I looked up and Philip was in the doorway. 

"What's wrong, Beautiful?" Philip asked as he came over and started cuddling with me. 

I cuddled with him back and I cried even more.

"I love you, Beautiful." Philip said

"I love you, Pip." I told him

Eliza walked by the door slowly with a grin on her face 

"Awwwwwwwwww I WANT MORE GRANDKIDS!'' She yelled as she walked by

"Mom!" Philip yelled and laughed