- I Would; One Direction - 
- What A Man Gotta Do; Jonas Brothers -
- Don't Matter; Akon -
- Personal; The Vamps ft. Maggie Lindemann -

Carter Jackson

I kissed her. I kissed Rory. I took her first kiss and maybe I'm selfish for doing so, but she just kept thinking I didn't want her and it's not that I didn't want her - I just don't want to hurt her.

Not that I'm planning to, I never want to hurt her. I just tend to hurt people unintentionally, and Aurora Holland needs no more hurt in her life than she already has. Her own cousin and mother treat her like shit, and it's very obvious that she's become dependent on me. The last thing I need is to fuck her over the way everyone else in her life has.

I paced my bedroom, rubbing my cheeks. What am I to do if she decides that kissing me was a mistake? We haven't talked, but it's because her mother's been forcing her to do more outing things with her family.

I don't know too much about the details, minus the fact that it was a load of shit. I don't know if Paige said something to her parents so they're forcing more 'family time', or if her father has decided to actually treat Rory like she's his daughter. Either way, they're out spending the day together as a family with Paige and her parents, and friends were unable to go.

And knowing Vivenne Holland, she was doing everything in her power to keep Rory from texting anyone, especially if she finds out it was me.

I don't know why Vivienne hates me the way she does. Maybe it's because I'm the only person around Rory who's caught on with the way she's treated, and I'm the only one bothered to do something about it. Sure, others only know an extent, but that extent that they knew was still too much to just sit around and do nothing about.

Paige, Jason, and Harold Holland fall into that category. I guess you don't need to count Jason Holland, simply because he's a child and even if there was something he wanted to do about it, he can't.

But Paige - someone who was constantly around Rory all the time - you'd think even if Rory never opened up to her about it, she'd catch on. I was only around Rory for a few weeks before noticing something like this.

Logan, I guess, can be excluded from that as well. Vivienne didn't know Logan was hiding out in Rory's bathroom, simply due to Rory being afraid of getting caught with a boy in her room.

However, had that been me hiding in her bathroom? The moment I heard Vivienne say one rude comment, I'd have been out spewing hateful words. I don't give two fucks that our fathers work together, I don't give two fucks that Vivienne has her husband wrapped around her finger.

Nobody talks to Rory that way - family or not.

I can't explain the things I feel for Rory, considering it's something I've never felt before. I never even felt this way for Ashley - and we were dating.

Well, I guess most people wouldn't consider it dating. She moved here, put on that beautiful angelic act that she was this perfect little human that did nothing but love everyone - yet she was the complete opposite.

She's nothing but the devil in disguise. She's evil and will do anything and everything to get what she wants. She doesn't care who she hurts, even if it's someone she claims to love.

I've never hated someone as much as I hate Ashley, which says a lot because I dislike people more than I like them.

However, that being said, I've thought less and less of Ashley and our bad blood the more I've been around Rory. Rory makes me forget about everything that's happened to me and the things I've done to other people. She makes me think that love exists and is worth the hurt that comes with it.

That's cliche, and I hate to say it but I find myself becoming one of those cliche movie characters more and more each day that passes.

The sound of the doorbell ringing brought my attention to my thoughts, and I stopped pacing my bedroom. I waited to see if Logan or one of my parents would get the door, but after another impatient ring, I realized I was going to have to be the one to answer.

Jogging downstairs, I was quick to flick open the door without another thought. On the other side of the door stood Layla Harrison and Bailey Letterman, which only made me think they were here to see Logan.

"Logan your friends are here!" I exclaimed, my face facing the stairs. I then turned back to the two girls in front of me, "I have no idea where he is."

"It's okay, we can wait," Layla said with a fake smile, inviting herself in.

"Well, please do come in," I spoke sarcastically. I stepped to the side so they didn't bump into me, Bailey sending me an apologetic look. I ignored it, knowing there was no true meaning behind that look.

Bailey and Layla are a duo, two people you hardly see apart. They're both ecstatic party animals, who do and take what they want.

Not in the same way that Ashley does, but in the sense of they know how to fake it till they make it.

Bailey and Layla are close to the same person, and a lot of people assume they're either sisters or dating when they first meet them. The only difference between the two teenagers is that Layla's more on the bad side, whereas Bailey's a goody two shoes to an extent.

Don't get me wrong, Bailey's a bit of a firecracker. She's another version of Layla, just more toned down. Bailey's like the older sister of the two - and has actually helped Layla do fewer illegal and bad things and tone down a bit on the dramatics.

Kind of like Cameron Letterman with Griffin Lakes, in a way.

After both of them were in the house, I shut the door. I walked over and helped myself to the unused TV in the living room, ignoring the gossip the girls talked about as they waited for my brother to accompany them.

"You talk to Paige?" Bailey asked Layla, to which the other girl scoffed.

"As if," The girl with blue streaks responded. "You think I'm going to let Paige Holland get away with the way she talked to Rory?"

At the mention of Rory, I completely blocked out the TV. It was as if they were acting as if I weren't here, and I was kind of glad. This means I can act as if I'm watching the TV and couldn't care less about what they were saying - which was true to an extent. I'd much rather hear the romance movie playing on the screen instead. But once Rory's name left Layla's mouth - I completely zoned it out.

"That was pretty shitty," Bailey responded, and I heard a soda can open. "Logan said he finally made up with her as well."

"Love that for him," Layla said. "He's been all moody since she stopped talking to him. What even happened there? I feel so left in the dark."

"Well, thanks to my lovely brother, I know the details." Bailey bragged, "I guess he promised he wouldn't say something, and went and said something. To Paige. Which resulted in Paige knowing what she said at the party."

"Wow, that's kinda-"

"Shitty," Bailey cut her best friend off. "I don't know the secret, but I assume it's something to do with her family considering that's what Paige had been babbling on about."

"Well, I'm glad they made up. Logan's not the best at picking up those types of cues." Tell me about it.

"You think he's going to ask her?" Bailey then asked, her voice a lot quieter than it was before.

It was silent for a good moment before Layla finally responded. "He's been talking about it, but he's trying to decide whether or not to just take Lex since he knows Rory's not interested in him. I think he should go for it, but I've been thinking they'd be cute since Rory moved here."

Okay, disgusting. The last thing I want to think about is my brother and Rory being a thing, especially considering Rory and I are... well, what are we?

We're definitely not just friends, but I haven't asked her to be my girlfriend yet. Ever since she fully admitted to me she hadn't had her first kiss before (which I've known for a while, I guess it's just different hearing it from her herself) I've just realized how much things will change if I move forward with this friendship.

Not that I don't want to, I want to more than anything. But I meant what I told Rory when I told her I didn't want to end up making her regret choosing me as her first kiss. Not only am I her first kiss, but if I were to officially ask her to be my girlfriend, then that means this is her first-ever relationship and I'm her first-ever boyfriend. I don't want to fuck something up and ruin the idea of romance for her.

But the thought of Logan taking Rory to homecoming and trying to pursue something that he shouldn't makes me angry. I know it shouldn't, but it does. Logan's always been the type to get any girl he wants - it's obvious by how cocky he can get. I know people say that both of us could, and I'm pretty sure that if it came down to it I could get whatever girl at Riverway High that I want. But when it comes to Logan and I wanting the same thing - whether it be we're interested in the same girl, or we want the same car - Logan gets it first.

He's the baby of the two of us, the perfect child. He's always gotten better grades than me. The main thing I can say I've done better at than him is sports but that's because I use it to let out my anger and frustration. He doesn't want to hurt people when playing, whereas I don't give two shits if I break an ankle.

It makes me feel something, just as I told Rory it did.

Besides, Rory's already said she's not going to homecoming. I'm very sure they're not aware of that yet, especially since they're talking about it. But either way, she's not going and I'm really hoping she doesn't end up going with Logan.

Of all people, not my brother. I can barely handle how touchy Elijah gets with her, and he has no ill intentions behind it. Let Logan be the one touching her in any way, I think I might break his ankle.

"Can you imagine what it would be like if they had kids?" Bailey asked, causing me to cringe. The conversation had already gotten too far, and now as I sit here and yank at the hole in my jeans, I find it really hard not to intervene.

We're high schoolers, for fuck sake.

"Imagine her eyes with his skin tone." Layla agreed. I took a glance over at the girls, seeing bright smiles on their faces. They were enjoying this, and I couldn't tell if it was because they were genuinely interested in Rory and Logan becoming a thing, or because they knew I was in the room and it would piss me off.

Then again, the only ones that really know about what's going on between Rory and me, are Katherine and Elijah. Not because I care who knows, they just happen to be our closest friends and know things before everyone else.

"That would be beautiful. She has the prettiest eyes!" Bailey gushed, and I couldn't help but take no more of this stupid conversation.

"Imagine if they got homecoming King and Quee-"

"Rory's not going to homecoming, and they're definitely not having kids." I shot up from the couch, not letting Layla finish her statement.

Both of the girls looked over at me in shock, surprised I was even listening to their conversation. Usually, when I sat around Logan and his friends I tune out most of the talk, but I just couldn't. The moment Rory's name left their mouths, I was hooked.

"Um, no offense, Carter, but since when do you care?" Bailey asked, her dark brows furrowing in confusion. She seemed to think about it for a moment, unaware as to why I was so defensive.

Layla rolled her eyes, leaning against the island they were sitting at. "Oh, Bails, you oblivious thing." She sighed, her eyes dancing between me and the other girl. "Poor little Carter here is in love with little Rory."

"What?!" Bailey and I asked at the same time, looking at the other girl. Bailey just looked confused, whereas I could tell I was looking at her with a look of horror on my face.

My eyes danced back over to Bailey, who thought about what Layla was saying. Then, the smallest smile covered her features as if she came to a realization on her own.

"Come on, Carter Jackson. You don't think it's obvious you're head over heels for the girl?" Layla slid off of the stool smoothly, fixing her jeans. "Since when do you attend classes, hang out with us as a friend group, and take a girl to the fanciest restaurant in the town?"

"That's happened?" Bailey asked, looking at her best friend in shock. 

"Just because I'm hanging out with Rory more often doesn't mean I'm in love with her," I denied.

"Oh yeah?" Layla asked, stepping up to me. "So tell me right now that you don't like her, and I'll let it go." She tilted her head to the side, a sly smirk on her freckled face.

She was enjoying this, wasn't she?

She's doing this on purpose, I know Layla. We've gone to school together our entire lives, and we've been in the same friend group for almost the same length. She's someone I used to skip classes with, finding ourselves smoking weed with some of the other students underneath the bleachers.

That was the extent of my and Layla Harrison's friendship. She was friends with my friends, and my brother took her under her wing when her father left her family. He let her stay in one of our many spare rooms, making sure she was dealing with the divorce of her parents well. He didn't like seeing her constantly drinking and smoking - so he became an older brother to her.

"I saw you, you know." Layla then said after I didn't respond, touching a finger to my chest. "At the party. With none other than Paige Holland. You're the reason they're fighting."

"No, I'm not," I said, simply because I'm not. Rory opened up to me about the party, and although I was a product of Rory blowing up on Paige, I'm not the exact reason that they're not talking right now.

"Yeah? So how come when Rory saw you and Paige mingling at the party she decided to down two Jello shots with me as if it were nothing?" She questioned, raising an eyebrow. "Just saying,"

"And I'm just saying," I said, not letting her words bother me. "Paige is into me, yes, but I've done nothing to entertain that idea. And I'm not in love with Aurora Holland, thank you very much."

Layla studied my features, another smirk covering her face. "Then Logan has every right to go after her if he wanted."

"If he even thinks of going near Rory with intentions other than-"

"Sorry I'm so late!" Logan stomped down the steps, a smile on his face. His cheeks were red as if he'd been rushing around, not seeming to notice we were in the middle of a conversation. "I was on the phone."

My jaw clenched as I hadn't been able to finish what it was I wanted to say. Of course the moment I go to say something Logan comes in at the worst possible time. I just looked back down at Layla, who sent me a wink.

"Let's get going, don't wanna be late, ya?" She then asked, walking away as if we weren't in the middle of talking.

Logan didn't notice the look on my face, and instead just sent me a wave before following the shorter girl out of the door. This left Bailey and I, who just began to sheepishly follow my brother and her best friend.

I looked down, my jaw tensing as I replayed the conversation in my head over and over again. I'm not in love with Rory, I don't even know what love is, and the fact that just because I showed some interest in her makes others think that-

"Carter?" Bailey then asked, catching me from my thoughts. I looked up at her, giving her a chance to finish what she wanted to say. "I think that if you have feelings for Rory, you should go after it." She fiddled with her fingers, a soft look on her face. "I didn't realize you might have feelings for her, otherwise I would've been more careful about the things I was saying a little bit ago. Also, she talks about you a lot to Griff and Cam, you know. I think it'd be cute, and it's been a while since you've let yourself be happy."

Without another word, she left. She didn't give me any chance to respond, any chance to tell her that they were overthinking it. Obviously, they weren't. They got me right on the money about having feelings for Rory, but the more that people find out before we're even a thing, then the more of a chance it'll get ruined before it can begin.

And that's the last thing I want.

++

I think I've got MOST of the timeline for the rest of this story played out, just needing to add a couple of things here and there <3 

* This chapter is not edited *