Rory groaned. "Go away, Doctor!"

On the other side of the door, the man in question huffed and crossed his arms over his chest. "I just need to talk to you. You're already up, anyway."

"No, I'm in the loo. And it's two in the morning! We can talk later!"

"This is important, Rory!"

After a moment, the Doctor heard the flush of the toilet and the running water of a faucet. A minute later, Rory stepped out with a cross glare on his face. "You better make this quick."

The Doctor nodded quickly. "I will. Control room?"

---------------

"What's so vitally urgent that you dragged me out of our room at two in the morning?" The British man demanded, crossing his arms and plopping down on the pilot's chair.

The Doctor reached up and fiddled his bowtie, trying to figure out how to word his explanation.

"Well, I've been thinking," He began, wringing his hands, "about stuff. With, you know, River."

Rory raised an eyebrow. "What do you mean?"

"Well, I'm getting the impression that the two of us are, erm," he bit his lip, "somehow involved in the future."

"Wait, you're not together?" Rory looked surprised.

"Well, of course not!" The Doctor shot back, exasperated. "What gave you that idea? See, the thing is, I noticed that at the end there, when we were saving you and Amy's lives, that she started... you know, flirting, a bit. And I think I may have done it, too, even though I didn't really mean it, and she may have gotten the impression that-"

"Wait a second." The younger man cut in. "How did you not see this? You've been flirting with her the entire time! Yes, you're involved in the future. I thought you were already together. What does this have to do with me being awake at two in the bloody morning?"

The TimeLord frowned and began pacing to the console. "She sort of, you know," he made a gesture with his hands and contorted his face.

"What?"

"You know!" The Doctor replied. "She... well, she kissed me."

Rory snorted. "And you're surprised?"

"Of course I'm surprised! Was taken a bit off guard there!"

"You've been flirting with her, touching her back, and she's been insinuating filthy things I don't even want to think about the entire time she was with us, and now you're surprised she kissed you?"

"She wasn't..." the Doctor looked up for a moment, "Wait. She was talking about that?" He squeaked, turning away. "But that's.... no!"

"Um, yeah. I'm still confused about what you want from me. What possesed you to drag me out of bed?"

"Nothing possesed me, although if I ever do this again, the symptoms you'd look for if I was possesed would probably be bloodshot eyes and shaking, due to part of my brain fighting to take control of my nervous system-"

"Doctor!"

"Right. Not what you meant. Well," he took a deep breath, "I wanted to know what you do when you... feel something."

"Feel something?" Rory gave him a look.

"Well, I mean... you know. It just felt nice when she kissed me, and I didn't think it was gross. And it felt really good. I think I was... happy, maybe? I don't know. But it was good. And now I don't know what to do, because she seems to do this a lot with me in the future, and then-" The Doctor took a deep breath. "I think she might be my wife in the future."

Any hope (or maybe fear) that Rory would disagreed quickly went away when the other man nodded. "Well, yeah. Seems so to me. First thing Amy whispered to me when I met her."

The Doctor frowned. "Why would it take me this long to see it?"

"You're thick?" Rory suggested.

"Perception filter, maybe. That would explain why my chest tends to knot up a little bit. And my heart rates accelerate by 3.2% around her... it may not be a perception filter. She could be sabatoging my mind, and my physical functions. Oh, yes! That's brilliant. But why would she do that? She couldn't be a trap... Could she? Is she working for someone who hates me? Then again, from what I've seen so far she doesn't really seem-"

"Doctor!"

"Yeah?"

"She's not working for someone else. I just think that you are starting to like her." Rory grinned. "You've got a crush."

"What? I'm not sure I'd call it a crush- it's just a little squirmy feeling in my stomach. I'm not a school-boy!"

"Well, she's going to be your wife. I don't see any harm in starting to warm up to her."

"Rory!"

"Hey, I'm just saying!" The man put his hands up.

"Well, what am I supposed to do? how do you go about this.... courting?"

"Courting? You mean dating?"

"Yes, fine, if you must use the word," the Doctor spit out, "dating."

"So you're asking me for dating advice? You?"

"Yes." The Doctor admitted.

"The ancient man who knows everything and is, and I quote, 'far more clever than you stupid humans'?"

"Yes."

"Well then." Rory grinned at him.

"What?" The Doctor demanded.

"Just enjoying the moment."

The Time Lord scowled. "Are you going to help me or not?"

"Fine, fine! Let's start with the basics. What does she like to do?"

"She likes to shoot things." The Doctor said after a moment.

"Anything else?"

"She likes old things. You know, what with her profession in idle gossip."

"Oh, old things? Like you?"

"Well, yes, actually, I do believe-" The Doctor caught the amused smirk on Rory's face an scowled. "Shut up."

"Okay, okay. Fine. Is there a place she likes to go? Anything she's mentioned? Things like that?"

"Well," The Doctor scratched he back of his head, "Once she met me at a bar. She seemed to be enjoying that."

Rory raised an eyebrow. "A bar doesn't seem like your thing, Doctor."

"It's not, but it's hers, right? So doesn't that mean I can take her there?"

Rory's expression softened. "Yeah. I guess so, but you might not like it, so it won't be as fun for the both of you. But," He added on, "I wouldn't min having a picture of you being drunk out of your mind on my phone."

"No, no. None of that. " The Doctor replied absent-mindedly, thinking. "What about old stuff. How could I make a date out of that?"

Rory shrugged. "I dunno. Museum?"

"Hm. No, that's boring. The real fun is getting your stuff put in a museum." After a moment, the Gallifreyan's face lit up. "Oh, yes, I'm brilliant!"

He rushed over to the controls.

After a moment in silence except for the flipping of levers, Rory decided to ask. "Doctor, what are you doing?"

"Hm? Oh, you're still in here. I'm going to pick River up. You can go back to sleep."

Rory rolled his eyes, but left with a roll of his eyes. "You kids have fun, then."

--------------------

"So, sweetie." River practically purred, striding over to him and fixing his crooked bow-tie. "Where are we going?"

"Um," the Doctor cleared his throat, suddenly realizing that he was actually doing this. Taking River Song on a date. "Well, I was thinking we try Egypt. You know, in a pyramid. Try and carve something, maybe, or figure out the origins of one of those curses."

One of her eyebrows shot up. "When are you?" She immediately asked. You have done the pyramid? 5:02 in the afternoon?"

He bit his lip and gave her a confused look. "Um, no. Spoilers, River!" He bopped her nose, hurrying around her to input coordinated. Her face fell slightly, but picked up a second later as if it hadn't.

"Okay then. When are we going, then?"

"I don't know. A.D., B.C., take your pick!"

-------------------------

~2 hours later~

"Must you always pick fights with the dangerous ones?" River yelled at the Doctor.

"Hey, it wasn't my fault! They were scaring those poor undertakers!" He yelled back over the loud grumbling behind them, turning and scanning the large cow-shaped animal that was chasing them.

"That's not what they're called!"

"Close enough! You get the point!"

"And it was your fault! They just fed off of the sound waves! It wasn't like they were killing anyone!" River said, glaring at him, and got a few shots off behind her back.

"But we made a lot of the undertakers feel safer!"

"By collapsing the tomb they were supposed to be tending to?"

"Well... that's still not the point."

"Yes it is!"

"Oh, here's the TARDIS!" The Doctor happily pointed out, changing the subject.

River made a sound that suspiciously reminded him of a growl, and shoved him aside to go into the TARDIS first.

------------

~15 minutes later~

River froze.

Was that... Rory? At close to 4 in the morning, according to the TARDIS clock?

".....So she liked it?" He was saying.

"I think." The Doctor replied, "She did kiss me as soon as I went into the TARDIS. But she was yelling at me before that. So maybe not."

Rory was quiet for a moment. "Could've been adrenaline. You know, Amy's like that. We'll go on some adventure with you where we almost die and then she.... you know."

"Well, I had fun. And we did collapse a tomb that will have artifacts being found for years after."

Was that what it was about? River mused. He was trying to do things according to her tastes. Now that she thought about it, they did seem to be behind some of the major things in history happening. Not in an obvious way, of course, but in the small, subtle ones that you didn't notice if you didn't know to look for them.

"Then just hope that she did too. Ask her, and then be really sweet when you drop her off."

There was a hesitation in the Doctor's part to ask the next question. "Am I.... do I kiss her goodnight? I think I do. I haven't gotten the hang of it, obviously, the whole dating thing. Is that how it goes?"

River waited for her father's answer.

"Yeah, I should think so. She seems familiar enough with you. Hell, you never know. You could even get some action, old man." Rory chuckled at that. "I'm going back to sleep. River will probably be back from her shower in a minute anyway."

"Hold on. What did you mean, 'get some action'?" the Doctor questioned.

"Goodnight, Doctor!"

No. No!

Yes. Her own Dad had given her husband dating advice. With her. Before he knew she was her daughter.

She had to cover her mouth to keep a chuckle from escaping her lips.

There were oncoming footsteps, and River quickly slid into a nearby cupboard until they receded.

She came out a minute later, toweling her hair.

"Sweetie?" She called loudly into the control room.

A brown mop of hair appeared from under the console. "Yes, dear?"

"I need to go back to Stormcage." She informed him, fluffing her hair one last time before placing the towel over a rail.

He nodded and walked up the steps to the console and slowly began typing in coordinates and flipping levers, all the while glancing periodically over at her. She rolled her eyes after a good two minutes, and stood up to help.

She got them there in approximately 5 seconds.

Outside her cell, the Doctor pouted and scratched at his hair. "You know, you really could stay a little longer."

She gave him a stern look. "You know I can't, my love."

"But why?" He whined, leaning closer to her. "What's so important in a cell?"

"Spoilers."

He groaned. "Infuriating woman."

"You love it."

"I don't."

"You do."

After a slight hesitation, he grinned and nodded. "I do."

"That's a good boy." She shot him one of those smiles that always got him melting and ran a hand down his arm.

He shivered and subconsciously leaned closer. "Am I?"

"Mhmm." She made a noise of agreement.

He licked his lips, and his gaze lowered to her mouth. "So do I get a reward?"

She ran a hand up to the nape of his neck and bit her lip. Oh yes. There. She rubbed a circle and lightly pressed into the side of his neck. He leaned into her hand.

"Do you, my love?" She replied with a question.

Without further hesitation or thinking, he closed the distance between them and pressed his lips to hers.

Vaguely, he thought of vanilla and honey. That was what she tasted like. There was something else, too. Something vaguely familiar, yet strange and new and exciting with a slight tang.

He deepened the kiss slightly, until she pulled back gently and rubbed her nose to his. After a moment of silence, she whispered, "I had a nice time." Might as well not keep the man wondering for the next week.

"Good." He smiled, and pulled her into an embrace. "I'm glad."

---------

~about 3 years later~

Rory shook his head and took another sip of tea. "When will I learn not to go into the control room without asking if you're in there?"

River grinned at her red-faced father. "Oh, come on now, Dad! You do realize that you're the one that told the Doctor just how to- how did you word it?-'get some action'?"

This time, both men took on horrified expressions and denied it.

Conveniently, TARDIS footage of the conversation from years ago suddenly appeared on Amy's phone and River's communicator an hour later.