We lived almost next to each other, only a few trees divided our houses. We played at home, in the garden, in the woods. The world was healing after the wounds of war when we were born. People have been recovering from this catastrophee for almost two decades, but at the same time they are trying to survive the last six years. They do not live, they try to survive each day.

People gather in the forests of the Middle. They are going to take a big step, and stand for their country. My closest person and I are sitting unnoticed in a place close to the fenced area where the most important people are concentrated. The order was to get the most information possible out of the general's office. It's just the two of us, they sent us to death.

We wait, sit or sleep on the spot for many hours. Not even to think about a full sleep, we are too stressed. When at least one of us manages to fall asleep, the other always comforts the sleeping person so that he does not shake or murmur from sleep. Everyone knows that thoughts and memories can lead us to an unworthy death. I have often seen a boy stand out of a safe haven after not following a plan and driven by conscience, and while he has taken a step, he was slowly brought to the ground by the shots from the other side.
By putting it on paper, I start these thoughts and memories, because there is a task ahead of us. Writing on my knees, leaning on roots, I watch the soldiers change their positions every three hours. This change of position is the last before we try to fulfill what we have been commanded. I have a plan ready in detail, I see the path we will take in front of my eyes.

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They caught us. An hour has passed, but it's still hard to believe what happened. My friend is lying next to me on the ground, shaking. I'm afraid he'll lose this fight with himself and try to escape. I hold his hand and try to calm him down by talking about the past and our childhood. He slowly falls into restless sleep caused by exhaustion from endless stress and fear for his life. I try not to think of a bullet scratch that rubbed my leg while trying to kill me.

The guards took turns as we set off in a quiet, fast run. There was no one by the fence, silence everywhere. We easily helped ourselves by jumping over the fence with a stern on which a soldier sat after a long stand. Crouching at the ground, we ran around the nearest corner because we saw two soldiers coming from behind another building. We were afraid they would hear us because after a fast run, our chests were rising and falling uncontrollably.

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They knew it, they knew it all the time ... they knew we were hiding under the tree in a hole for all this time. They found us, they left us just because of this notebook. They knew we were wrong to embark on such an impossible mission. There were at least two hundred soldiers in the fenced area. Against two.

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They made me do it. I had to kill him. If i did not do it, i would not be writing this.
He was begging them to leave him alone until he realized that he can't change his destiny. I saw his eyes quickly looking around and trying to find escaping point. He realized where he can move so he waited for the right time to run. When no one was looking at him, he silently and quickly made a move to the right side where there was a gate. They realized that he's running away after a short period of time. They ran after him and easily caught him. He gave up. Completely. He was given a chance to say his last words but he stayed silent. His tears were dropping on the ground while he was kneeling 20 meters in front of me. Shoot ! My hands were shaking while i aimed. Shoot ! screamed the man. I got scared my finger moved and shot without me wanting. Sweat and tears were mixing and falling down on my cheeks. His body fell down on the ground.