Chapter 6;

When Sunday passed and Monday arrived I was worried about seeing John. I had no way of contacting him and he knew that. But would he be mad that I didn't try harder? I ended up telling my dad what happened only because he walked in on me crying later that day. I reluctantly got ready this morning, pulling on something decent and going downstairs to see my dad making an actual breakfast instead of just cereal. 

"What's the occasion?" I asked skeptically. 

"Nothing. Breakfast is the most important meal of the day. Anyways, how're ye feeling?" 

"I'm okay." 

"You know ye don't 'ave to go to school today if you don't want to." 

"Ta dad, but I wanna see John. But maybe if I 'ave to leave, to see how he's holdin' up. Could you write me a pass?" 

" 'Course darlin'. It's very responsible of you. Tryin' to 'elp yer friends." 

"Ta dad." I said, as he handing me a plate of eggs, bread and bacon. "How's work?" 

"Good. I was disappointed that ye weren't home as early as I wanted you to be on Friday night." 

"What?" 

"I don't want to seem too strict but I had no clue who you were out with and it was getting late, I would've at least liked a phone call or a note." 

"I-I'm sorry dad..." I said blown away. "I should've been more considerate." 

"No need to worry, you shoulda invited that fella' in though." My dad said winking at me. Shit, I thought I saw someone in a window. 

"Alri'. I will next time." 

"Good darlin'. Have a good day at school." He said, bringing his plate over to the sink and straitening his tie. 

"Ta dad. Have a good day!" I said as he walked out and Paul walked in. 

"Alright Eloise?" 

"Okay. Alright Paul?" 

"Fine. This smells delicious." 

"It is, have some," I told him, pointing towards the stove. "I'll be right back. Excuse me." I told him and ran up stairs. I felt odd around Paul now, not just because he saw me crying but... Well, that was the reason. I looked at my reflection in the mirror and put on a bit of makeup, then carried myself back down the stairs. "Paul, are ye ready?"

 "Sure!" Paul said from the kitchen and in mere seconds he was at the door with me.

We got on the bus and continued on to the school. We stopped at John's stop but he never got on, or at least didn't come to the back. I looked out the window, confused and unsure what to do. By the time we got to school I basically rushed to our first block, hoping to see John, but I didn't. Only Stu and Pete were there. 

"Pete, Stu. Have you guys see John?" I asked, out of breath from running to class.

"No, but I don't think he'd want-" Stu began to say but I cut him off. 

"I don't care Stu. I only care if he's okay." 

"He's fine. He gets like this. I'm sure he'll just be late." Pete told me and I nodded. 

"I hope yer right." I said and took my seat. I waited and waited through out class, watching the door. It was killing me. Where was John. If I was John, where would I be? I said inside my head, then it hit me. Once the bell rang over head I was the first one out of class, and already sprinting down the hallway, accidentally running into people. But I didn't care at the moment. 

I ran down the street, people looked at me like I was mad, yet I didn't care. I ran past trees and bushes, I'm sure that I had scratches up and down my legs. I stopped to breath once I got there, and looking towards the lake I saw John, in the same place we had been a few days ago. "I was hoping you'd be here." I said, making John turn around and look at me, before turning back around. "May I sit?" 

"Go 'ed." John said, then turned to look at me, his face flushed and his eyes puffy. 

"John. I heard what happened, I'm so sorry. I wish I could've been there." I said regretfully. If I could've, I would've I laid my hand down and John grabbed it. 

"It's not yer fault. Like you said, nothing can change it." 

"John. What happened with my mom was years ago. It's different." I said, and he just sniffed. "John, please talk to me." 

"Damn it Eloise. What do you want me to say? That he was one of my best friends, that he took care of me and was soft and warm compared to Mimi? That Mimi said it's silly to cry, yet I'm here now doing so? That I feel guilty; having the time of my life and then his ended." John said bitterly but it soon turned into sadness as he began to cry.

"Shh, John. It's okay. I'm here." I said, holding him in his arms. 

"Yer here now, but you'll leave. Everyone does." 

"Nothings constant John. But I will be, as long as yer constant with me. The time you need to be held, I'll lift you up. I won't leave unless you pack up the bags and get the ticket." I said, as his tears soaked through my top. 

"Why're you here? Why do you care?" 

"Because, I'm a moth, and no matter how many times I get stung, I keep on flying back." 

"Don't use my own words." John said, started to laugh a sad laugh as he pulled his head from my shoulder and touched my cheek. 

"But they're true." I said, nervously as he bent down and kissed me softly, but needy-like. Then pulled away. 

"I'm going to be late." 

"For school?" 

"For the burial." John said, standing up and brushing himself off. Then looking down at me. 

"What?" 

"Ye coming?" John said, a small smile tugging at his lips and he put a hand out for me. I took it and he pulled me to my feet and draped his arm around me. 

"Are you sure yer Aunt'll be okay with me coming?" I asked suddenly, sort of nervous. 

"No. But I don't care. I'm late anyways." John said, as we crossed over to the nearby graveyard. I stood behind, watching from afar. Letting John go by himself. I watched as he threw dirt in the hole. Then a lady, appeared behind me. 

"Beautiful ceremony." She stated, looking down at me and smiling a sad smile. 

"I didn't get to see much of it." 

"Neither did I," She said, letting out a small laugh. "I don't think Marry would be to happy to see me." 

"Who?" I asked, and followed her eyes to where John and his aunt stood. "John's aunt Mimi?" 

"He still calls her that yeah?" She said laughing. "Do you know John?" 

"Yeah. He's great. Do you?" 

"Yes, but I wish I knew him more." She said, I glanced back to her and took in her features. 

"Yer John's mum?" 

"Yes. Julia, pleased to meet you." She said, putting her hand out, I took it and shook it. 

"Eloise." 

"Well Eloise, you seem very fond of Johnny then." She said, giggling. 

"Yeah." I said shyly. 

"Well, that's great. Would you please, please give him this letter." She said handing me a sealed envolope. "Tell him, to please stop by and you can come too." She said, and then backed away. I watch John approach me and I understood why she was leaving.

"How'd it go?" I asked, quickly, putting the letter behind my back. 

"She was mad I was late. But it's okay." 

"Well, how 'bout we go back to the lake and enjoy the rest of our day?" I asked and he smiled at me, nodding his head and pulling me along with him. I knew I was going to tell him today, give him the letter today and hope it would all work out. Because it's not always easy to find something that you've lost such a long time ago, hoping it'd still be there.