I woke up panting, chased from sleep by that phantom of a dream. It haunted me every night, every moment I tried to forget the waking world. It never left me alone, its only goal to force me away from sleeping every night, and there was only so much I could do to fight against it.

I hated closing my eyes, because whenever I did, I saw Thomas's bloody body, his face frozen in a gory moment of horror. I'd never be able to forget the blood that dripped from his mouth, and the pure blackness that haunted his eyes. I heard his distorted whispers, and though I couldn't always make out what they were saying, I knew enough to know of the threats that they hid. I felt the cold that seeped into my bones like poison, and I could still never shake its hold on me. It's funny, really. How I spent so much time trying to get rid of the dreams I once had, but now I would do anything to get them back. How I'd rather dream of being chased by a legion of shadows again rather than Thomas's last moments forever frozen in my mind.

Thankfully, Eliza was still asleep next to me. I watched her for a moment, unable to cry when her aura of calm and peace was pressed up against me. So as not to disturb her, I kissed her forehead lightly, and slipped out of bed. She didn't wake up.

I pulled a robe around my arms, stepped into the empty hallway, and just wandered. Searching, but not looking. Chasing, but not running.

I just need to make these dreams stop. Maybe Peggy has something for that. I'll ask her in the morning.

I knew there was only one cure for these dreams, and I knew I'd never see him again. Well, I suppose I could just never sleep again, but that's an impossible suggestion.

I need to get over him.

I wandered through the castle, retracing my old routes that I had walked alongside Thomas. But what had once been light and full of hope were know dark and destroyed by the emptiness that hollowed everything without his presence. Somehow, I ended up in the library, as though my feet brought me here without my mind agreeing.

The night was cold. I wasn't expecting anything different, as a chill had settled down on all of Perriterra, but it still stung all the same to step onto that balcony and be hit by the breeze. My fingers danced along the steel bars keeping me in, and for a moment, I wondered what would happen if they disappeared.

My fingers curled into the bars, holding me tightly, and I forced myself to look at the wall, tears streaming down my face. I didn't need this. Not right now.

I moved away from the railing and to one of the many rows of bookshelves. I searched the covers until I found a title that looked familiar to me, and retired to the couch. Sighing, I opened the cover of Alice in Wonderland and skimmed the pages, reading, but not really absorbing. And then, as I was trying my best to lose myself, I heard it.

The singing.

The instant I realized what it was, the book tumbled out of my hands, and I was on my feet. A disbelieving breath escaped my mouth as I sat there, listening. Whoever was singing was too far away for me to make out the words, but the melody that touched the air reached out to me. And the voice.

Oh, stars.

"Hello?" I called out, starting towards the door, where the singing seemed to be coming from. "Who's there?"

It couldn't be real. It was impossible.

But still, my steps broke into strides, and I flung the door open, almost ripping it off of its hinges. My breathing caught in my throat when I saw what was waiting for me outside.

Gone was the castle, instead replaced by an elaborate staircase leading to a pathway that stretched through a waiting forest. I picked my way down the first step and turned back. Behind me was a building that looked like a domed citadel, but it was labeled as a library. I reached for the door and opened it, but it was the same library that existed inside the castle.

"I—what happened?" I asked myself, but I abandoned the thought the second I heard the singing start up again. There was no doubt about who's voice it was. I turned and raced in the direction the song came from, throwing all caution to the wind. I didn't care if it was a trap, a trick, a siren. I just had to see him again.

The forest was almost just as I remembered, but there was something a bit lighter about it this time. Glass lanterns emitting a soft blue light hung from the branches that accompanied the cobblestone path. The trunks of the trees seemed bigger, but perhaps that was due to the strands of crystals that adorned them. The birds sung a perfectly rhythmic melody that was far too advanced for normal birds.

Overall, the forest looked like something straight out of a fairytale.

The singing got louder, and my heartbeat raced faster. The path diverged, and I picked the one where the singing was coming from and followed it deeper into the forest. I forced myself to run faster, even as my legs promised to give out underneath me. Each second I took in getting to him was a second wasted.

Finally, the trees gave way, revealing a little meadow with an undisturbed pond sitting in the middle. I searched the open space for a second, noticing how the water of the pool looked like a night sky rich with stars. And then I saw him, and the rest of the world faded away. I let out a shaky breath when I saw his figure sitting by the pond, singing lightly. I wanted to leap across the pool and wrap my arms safely around him and never let go, but my feet were rooted to the spot.

No. It doesn't make any sense. He can't—there's no way—I—

"Thomas?" I said, my voice trembling with the promise of tears.

His head shot up, eyes filled with horror at my sudden voice cutting through his peaceful oasis. "Alexander," he said softly, standing up. "You are...you are not supposed to be here, you know."

"Wait. I don't—I don't understand! Have you been here this entire time? We thought you were dead, but you're not?! You lied to us?!"

Thomas's gaze was solemn as his wings opened and carried him across the pond to where I stood. Once his bare feet brushed the ground, he reached for my arm slowly. His hand went right through me.

"Ghost-Thomas," I said, stumbling backwards.

Thomas's hand fell. "Is that what you call me?" Amusement touched his tone, and he hid his smile behind his hand, just as he always did. "Cute."

"But I saw you disappear."

"I only did that so you would leave."

It took a moment for the words to sink in, and a moment longer for me to fight back the urge to sob. "But why?" I asked desperately, searching for answers a smarter, more reasonable part of myself knew I would hate.

"Because you cannot stay here, Alexander. You have a war to win, and if you knew I was here, you would have stayed. And it is not like any good could have come from it. I cannot touch you, Alexander. I cannot feel."

"So?" I demanded. "I don't care about that!"

"Alexander," he said softly, reaching forward to brush my face, but I felt no touch. No warmth. "I cannot leave. You cannot stay. You have to move on from this."

"I don't want to move on!" I yelled, and for the first time, I realized it was true. As much as I pretended his death no longer affected me, the dreams that chase me away from sleep every single time I closed my eyes would say otherwise.

"I do not want you to move on, either, but it is not about what we want. It is about what is healthy." He sighed, stepping away from me. "I am not really here. I am just a figment of the real Thomas's mind."

I wanted to hug him more than I ever had before, and it was so frustrating to have him be right there and yet so impossibly far away. I wanted to melt against him, to feel his warmth, to be by his side, and I couldn't. "Please let me stay here, Thomas. I... it's enough for me to just be able to talk to you."

He turned, glancing at me warily. Then a smile touched his lips, and his shoulders caved. "I thought I would be immune to your pleading, but I guess not. Very well, you may stay for the rest of the evening."

I let out a sigh of relief. "Thank you."

"Walk with me?"

"Of course!" The words came out so quickly, as though I couldn't waste a second. Thomas rolled his eyes and smiled at my eagerness before leading me away from the star-lit pool. "You've really made this place your own, huh?"

Thomas nodded in agreement. "Thank you, I guess. I really do try. I mean, you saw the way it looked when it was first created."

I laughed, eyeing his hand. An urge to reach out and slip my fingers into his overwhelmed me, and it was next to impossible to push away. "I guess my only question is how this world is still...alive, I guess? If Thom—the real Thomas is dead, then what's keeping this place alive?"

"Honestly, I am not sure," he answered bluntly. He glanced back, as if making sure I was following him, and smiled. "It might have something to do with the energy embedded into this place. Maybe when it used up all of his—my?—life force, it kept a part of him alive here, making it impossible for the energy to die."

It was weird for Thomas to talk about himself in the third-person, but I guess it was just a hard reminder that this person wasn't the real Thomas, just a shell of his memories and personality.

"Where are we going?" I asked as we reentered the forest. It seemed a lot brighter with him walking right besides me, real or not.

"I have been working on a little...town of sorts. I trust you have seen the library, correct? That's where you came in?" I nodded, and he continued. "I did not mean to make it like a portal between our two worlds, but when you left here the first time and ended up in the library, it opened kind of like..."

"A cosmic door?" I finished for him, and he looked back at me again and the corners of his mouth stretched up, this time into a grin.

"You are such a nerd."

"Well, I do try my best."

"But essentially, yes. A cosmic door. The library was created soon after, and not far from it is a town."

"You created a town?"

"I got lonely," he said, suddenly quiet. "Perhaps I was planning on creating someone to live with me here. Or perhaps I was waiting for you."

My heart leapt into my chest, and I momentarily forgot about what kept us apart. I reached a hand forwards to touch his arm, but it fell right through. He turned away from me, smile gone. "My apologies."

"Please don't be sorry. I'm happy to see you."

"I am quite glad to see you too, Alexander. So, tell me about how James and Aaron are doing. Are they still working on the Tenebrie experiments?"

Thankfully, we didn't walk in silence. If we had, I don't know what I would have done. It would have been impossible to carry the knowledge that he was right there and I couldn't get to him, but fortunately, I was spared. Also, I missed the easy way we chatted.

"They miss you," I said to conclude what we had been talking about, and he didn't turn away like I was expecting. "Maybe I should bring them here."

"They do not miss me. They miss the real Thomas. I am not the real Thomas."

"I suppose that's true. But don't you think they'd want to know you're okay?"

Thomas smiled sadly and shook his head. "It is for the better that they do not. Perhaps they will find out on their own one day, but you must not tell them."

I hesitated. "If you say so."

Thomas raised his head, beckoning me forward with his hand. "We are here."

I let out a gasp of surprise as I took in the sights of the city. It wasn't a feeble, small town like Thomas had made it seem. "New York?" I breathed, stepping forward onto the concrete pavement. The forest had inexplicably faded away into the great spiraling buildings.

"And a bit of Paris. With a touch of Dubai thrown in. Note the water."

"Why?" I asked. "It's amazing, but I thought you would have chosen something a bit more...Avion inspired?"

"I am not quite sure." He turned away, flustered. "It is what felt right."

"Well, I really like it."

Thomas's wings flared a little bit with pride. "Would you like to see the theater? Or the library? There are more libraries. I might need to work on that. There are also some restaurants if you want to eat?"

"You can conjure food?"

"It is my world. I can do whatever I please."

I laughed, running forwards to explore the city. "Do you have like a broadway here or something?"

"I wish. I have a street of just theaters, but they are unoccupied. I need to bring life here."

Ghost-Thomas showed me the city. He showed me every part, explaining how and why he created each part and the names he was trying to decide between and the influence of human civilizations and how much he wished I would stay with him even though we both knew I couldn't. And for a moment, I forgot that he wasn't real. I forgot that my Thomas was dead.

But he wasn't really dead. Not if this city or this world existed. He was still here, somewhere.

"This is beautiful. I wish I could stay."

"I wish you could stay, too."

When I turned to face him, he looked like he was stuck between two hard decisions. I smiled at him and stepped closer. "I don't have a reason to go back, you know."

"Yes you do. And you must leave."

"Why would I want to leave when you're the only reason I stayed there in the first place? Everything I want is right here! I don't want to go back."

"It is not about want." Ghost-Thomas stepped up to me and fell to his knees so that I was looking down at him. "And that is not true. You have so much left ahead of you. You are going to do amazing things, Alexander. I love you more than life itself, but you have to go back." He smiled, though for once, it seemed less sure. "I am going to send you back now, but you are welcome to visit me whenever you want, just for the evening."

"Thank you," I whispered, choked up.

Ghost-Thomas nodded, and in seconds, he was gone. The whole world around me was gone, replaced only by the library, which now seemed like it was lacking something. I turned around and stepped to the door, hoping to find that it didn't work and I was stuck in Thomas's world. But the castle staircase greeted me, and heaving a sigh, I started my long journey down the stairs.