Captain Jack: **Very drunk** I love you, Rum! You get me!

Rum: I love you too, Captain! You are soooooooo pretty!

Captain Jack: Rum! You talk! How long have you been able to talk?

Rum: Your love brought me to life, Jack! But you know, you shouldn't be sitting here talking to me! You should be off hanging out with that Fangirl that was here the other day? She was pretty!

Jack: Why? I've known you a lot longer than I've known her, Rum!

Rum: Just love the Fangirl!! She loves you and you love her!!!

Jack: Why is the rum always so angry?

Rum: ...If you don't love that pretty Fangirl, I will go and tell all my rum friends to never let you drink them again! No rum for you forever! Do you want that, Captain?

Jack: No! No need to get hostile, Rum! I'll go ask that Fangirl on a date right now!

Rum: Good!

Jack: **Runs out of his cabin to go find me**

Me: **Comes out from under his desk** He-he-hee! He thinks the rum can talk! Crazy sexy pirate! **Takes bottle and starts to drink**

Rum: EEEEEEKKK!

Me:**Drops the bottle and bolts out of the cabin**

Jack the Monkey: Eeek! Eeeeek! Eeeekk! **Translation: Silly Dumb Humans!**

🥃☠❤