Disclaimer: SOME of the dialogue in this chapter, the main story plot (not my one) and the characters (apart from Grace and Philip) belong to the awesome mind of Cassandra Clare. Grace, Philip and my adaptions belong to me. So basically anything that isn't in the Infernal Devices.
****************************************************************************************

'Let me in and I will save you from the madness
Let me in and I will keep you from the storm
With every motion, every moment, that we've owned
I'll be here to break the fall.'

- Let Me In, Olly Murs

*****************************************************************************************
-*-*-*-*- Grace -*-*-*-*-
"Are you all right?" Jem asked her after Tessa left. Will had come in and was sitting by Jem in the armchair, trying to read a book. Grace still sat on the window seat, hugging her knees.

"Jem, you need to get some sleep," Will said, trying to divert his attention. Jem discarded his comment.

"Grace, please," Jem said. "I need to know that you're all right." Grace shook her head. How could he think she was fine after he just told an almost complete stranger her darkest secret and worst fear? There was a reason she struggled to tell people. They made a promise to each other that they wouldn't, but Jem broke that promise.

"Just don't talk to me," she said. Jem hesitated.

"I know you're angry at me," he said as he fiddled with his glowing red crystal. "But I think telling Tessa about it was the best thing for you. It isolates you, Grace, and I'm not going to be around much longer to make friends for you-"

"Is this what this is about?" Grace burst out, standing up and throwing her hands up in the air. "Making friends? Come on, James. Is that seriously your excuse? No, it's not about that at all."

"I'm just trying to make sure that you have a life after I'm gone," he said, his voice as calm as ever but his face pale and covered in sweat. "And as many people as possible to help you through it."

"Did it ever occur to you that maybe I don't want to have a life after you've gone?" Grace shouted. "Jem, you are all I have! I literally stay around because of you! What else do you want from me?!" There was silence in the room. Grace expected both Will and Jem to be angry at her. Hell, she wanted them to be angry at her, but both just looked at her with sad expressions on their faces.

"Gracey," Jem sighed. "All I want is to make sure you have a family when I go. Will and Tessa can be that family. She wants to be your friend and I think you can be as close as sisters. You're just held back."

"I'm held back because I'm trying to limit who I hurt," Grace said. "Jem, at any point I could blow. I don't want to hurt any more than I need to."

"You are not dangerous, Grace," Will said. "You won't hurt anyone." Grace snorted and stormed towards the door.

"Tell that to the man underneath the Dark House," she said, slamming the door behind her.

***

"Will, whatever you came here to tell me, you better go back to Jem because it won't work," Grace said to the window in the library. Obviously her comment was directed to the person who had just opened the door.

"It's not Will, miss," the voice said. "It's Sophie." Grace turned around.

"What are you doing here?" she asked but not unkindly. "I'm afraid I'm not in the best mood at the moment, Sophie dear, so perhaps you should leave before I break something that you'll have to clean up after me."

"You are not going to break anything, miss," Sophie said. "I've come to talk to you on Master Will's behalf, actually." That surprised Grace.

"Will?"

"He caught me just outside of Master Jem's room and asked if I would talk to you," Sophie said. "I've never liked Master Will but...I think this is for your sake, and I would do anything for you, miss." She stood awkwardly next to Grace in the armchair like she didn't know whether she should sit down or not.

"Well, you better make yourself comfortable," Grace said, indicating to the armchair in front of her. But Sophie stayed standing.

"You know that Master Jem is trying to protect you, miss, don't you?" Sophie said. "He's just doing what he thinks is best for you."

"I know," Grace sighed. "I over-reacted a bit. Some of the things I said were pretty bad. But sometimes Jem seems to live in a dream. Sometimes he doesn't think about what effects other people. I went too far, but I needed to say it."

"Begging your pardon, miss, but you are just like Master Will, sometimes," Sophie said. "Always saying things you don't mean." She moved and knelt in front of Grace. "But you see, miss, no matter what you say or do, I know who you truly are."

"How can you possibly know?" Grace whispered. "The demon has taken everything that makes me Grace Carstairs and turned it into a monster."

"I know because I saw that little girl looking at me with real sympathy and not disgust," Sophie said. "I know because I watched as she came over to me, took my hand and told me that everything was going to be all right. I know because I watched as she pulled Mrs Branwell over and begged for her to take me in." Grace looked at her in disbelief. They had never spoken of that day, ever.

"You see, miss," Sophie said, standing up. "That is the real you. That is the you Master Jem is trying to protect because he can't lose you, as much as you can't lose him." Suddenly Charlotte burst into the room.

"Sophie! Grace!" she said, her voice shrill. "Have you seen Tessa's brother?"

"He's not in his room?" Grace asked.

"No, Jessamine just woke up and he was gone," Charlotte said. "I'm going to round up the others. Sophie, please wake Tessa up. Grace, patrol the corridors just in case he tries to run out of a room he is hiding in."

-*-*-*-*- Philip -*-*-*-*-

Philip closed the door to the drawing room, locking it for the time being. He turned to Nate who was pacing up and down. "All right, why did you bring me here?" Nate asked.

"We've got some things to talk about," Philip said, opening a near by window and holding out his hand. Nate placed the note in it and Philip threw it out the window. He knew it would get to it's destination.

"Like what?" Nate asked.

"How you are going to remove the Shadowhunters from the Institute," Philip said.

"For what?" Nate asked. "What is the Magister's plan?"

"Grace Carstairs," Philip murmured. "Get rid of her family, and we've got her. That was his plan all along."

"Mr Blackthorn?" the voice of Thomas called out. He was rattling the handle of the drawing room door. "Mr Blackthorn, are you in there, sir?"

"Yes, Thomas," Philip said. "I just had to lock the door to keep our missing person from escaping. I'll let you in in just a second." Philip turned back to Nate. "You better be good at acting," he hissed at him. "The Magister is counting on you."

-*-*-*-*- Grace -*-*-*-*-

"...what about Jem and Grace?" Tessa hissed at Will in the corridor. "Why didn't you tell me about them?" Grace stopped around the corner, her back to the wall, listening in.

"Jem and Grace?" Will asked in surprise. "You're bringing up Jem and Grace?"

"Why didn't you tell me about them?" Tessa persisted.

"Because they didn't want me to," Will said. "It's their business and that's how they like to keep it. I wasn't even in favour of telling you. And neither was Grace. But Jem felt like he owed you an explanation so he made Grace let him." Grace bristled a bit. Will was being quite unfair although he was probably telling the truth.

"And you are blaming me for that?" Tessa exclaimed. "I tried to get him to stop but he carried on despite what Grace was looking like."

"You have no idea what she goes through every day of her life," Will growled. "Don't act like you understand that."

"I'm not," Tessa said. "Nobody could possibly understand that."

"Good," Will said. "Don't bring Jem and Grace up again. What happened to them wasn't their fault at all. Grace may think it was hers, but it wasn't. It's only what the Clave make her believe to isolate her. They carry the burden everyday and are ashamed of-"

"They have nothing to be ashamed of."

"Yes but others think they do," Will said. "They've endured others saying some brutal things to them, sometimes to their faces. That and the Clave always looking for an excuse to lock Grace up in the Silent City. I didn't want them to hear it from you too. Grace is rock hard, she has to be to survive, but Jem...some of these things get to him."

"What have you done to help them?" Tessa asked. "Jem told me that you had stopped looking for a cure for him. Have you even tried to find something to help Grace?"

"Yes, the Silent Brothers and Philip Blackthorn all have," Will said. "You don't understand that sometimes there is only a choice between acceptance and madness!" A hand touched Grace's. She started.

"It's only me," Jem whispered. She turned to him and hugged him fiercely. Jem seemed a little shocked but them wrapped his arms around her too.

"I'm so sorry," she whispered. "I'm so sorry. I know you're trying to help me."

"It's all right," he said. "I think we both went too far. I shouldn't have forced you to listen to that all over again."

"Thank you for always being there for me," Grace said as she pulled away. Jem reached out and cupped his hand under her chin.

"I'll always be there for you," he said. "And don't you forget it. Ever." Grace nodded.

"Now, let's break up those two," she said with a smile. Luckily it was Charlotte who interrupted Tessa and Will before Grace and Jem could intervene.

Now, they were all in the drawing room, Will and Jem leaning on the wall, Charlotte and Henry sitting on the sofa, Philip in an armchair by the fire, Tessa and Jessamine by Mr Gray's side and Grace, sitting on the window seat further back. They listened as Mr Gray told them all his story about how he got into contact with Mortmain and how he found out about Downworld. Although he was directing his story at Charlotte, every so often, he would glance up and Grace. It was only the slightest gesture but something about it chilled her to the bone.

"So you basically sold your own sister," Will said. Grace looked up at the both of them. Jem looked like he was going to explode with fury and disgust.

"It's not Nate's fault," Jessamine squeaked.

"Any mundane will do for you, Jess," Will sighed dramatically. They started screaming at each other as Charlotte tried to calm them down. Philip looked amused, which oddly made Grace feel angry. She caught Jem's eye who made a gesture and raised his eyebrows. The colours of their necklaces flashed red and gold, an odd mix but when Will and Jessie fought, some of the things they said were pretty amusing.

"Will, Jessamine, just shut up," Grace groaned. They quietened down and Nathaniel continued.

"He often talked about the automatons," he said. "I didn't understand all of it. But there was something about demon energies. That's why de Quincey hired the Dark sisters. They were meant to be finding a way to bind demon energies to the automatons-"

"Anything else?" Grace asked. Nathaniel look at her in surprise. It was the first thing she had said to him.

"Th-there was some sort of medallion they used that they bound the consciousness of a demon to," he stammered. "I remember the Dark sisters showing it to him. De Quincey laughed when he saw it."

"Did he say what it was for?" Grace persisted ruthlessly. Will and Jem were just catching on their faces a mixture of shock and eagerness.

"It was a certain demon...I don't know which, that the Magister wanted to lead the clockwork army," Nathaniel said. "They said they could use it to get it's allegiance. Apparently this demon was the most feared by all Shadowhunters, so it would be the ultimate weapon. Though I'm not sure if they needed the actually demon or they wanted to bind a demon to an automaton." Grace locked eyes with Jem who licked his lips nervously. They both knew the Magister's plan now.

"Where is the medallion now?" Charlotte inquired.

"De Quincey gave it to a man," Nate said tiredly.

"What man?" Jem asked. 

"I don't know," Nathaniel said, deflated. "He often came to the Magister but I never saw his face. He always wore a mask and a hood. All I know is that he was the person most trusted by the Magister and it was his task to find the..."

"The?" Will pressed.

"The rest of the demon," Nate said. "That's what they said anyway. The Magister said he had to find someone, capture them then kill them to get it. A girl, I think. They almost got her, but the automatons went wrong and just tried to kill her. The Magister was quite upset. He kept saying that it was almost a disaster."

 Jem, Will and Grace all looked at each other. Philip bit his lip, his eyes shifting to Grace. Grace knew what he was thinking. Anything like this he was meant to report the Clave immediately.

"Anyway," Nate said. "The Dark sisters need a full moon to bind demon energies to the clockwork creatures." Charlotte went pale.

"But that's soon," she said.

"I'll go and check in the library," Jem said, straightening up like a shot. "I'll be right back." Charlotte carried on interrogating Nate but Grace was worried. De Quincey wanted Yanluo to be whole again so it would lead his army of clockwork creatures, with Grace as it's host. Yanluo was known as the cruellest demon that ever set foot on the Earth. Demons were evil and cruel anyway, so being the cruellest was not a good thing. But Grace knew that if Yanluo finished off the work he started almost six years ago, there would be no coming back for her. She would be an empty shell, a super soldier whom through Yanluo would lead the clockwork creatures and destroy the world at Mortmain's command.

But this news also meant that Grace had to fight it off again. Last time it was whole, that hadn't gone so well. She knew that the only way she got out of this was to hide from de Quincey but she couldn't do that. That wasn't in her nature.

"The full moon!" Jem shouted breathlessly, running back into the room. "It's tonight." Everyone turned to Grace, their faces betraying their thoughts. Grace closed her eyes and took a deep breath.

Time for her to face her fears.

**************************************************************************************

Ok then, we've had some shocks and surprises in this chapter. Did anyone suspect Philip??? Is Philip even the bad guy??? You're going to have to wait and see... hehehe I feel so evil.

See you next update! Thank you for all your lovely support so far!!!