John: *appears disheveled and is straightening his tie.*

Paul: *acts as if nothing happened.*

George: *eating a candy bar.*

Ringo: *nervously.* Well, we've returned to talk about—

John: Abbey Road!

Paul: No, John, we're doing that last.

John: Well, I want to talk about Abbey Road!

George: *ignores all of them.* Next up, Rubber Soul.

Ringo: Our souls are rubber, it seems.

John: Yep.

Paul: We look rather . . .

George: High?

Ringo: Stoned?

John: Sexy?

Paul: George and Ringo, yes. John, you are a narcissist.

John: I didn't I was the only one that was sexy. I said we ALL were.

George: *snorts.* "Were" is the keyword of that sentence. As in, not anymore.

Paul: Who says so?

Ringo: We're all old.

John: *harrumphs.*

George: ANYWAY, my favorite song on Rubber Soul is "Run for Your Life."

John: *groans.* Why? That's the worst song on that album.

George: I kind of like my guitar work, thank you very much.

John: Other than that, it sucks.

Ringo: I like "Norwegian Wood."

Paul: Isn't it good?

George: Speaking of which . . . John, whose house did you burn down?

John: How are you getting arson out of that?

Paul: Well, you did say that you lit a fire.

John: I could have been lighting a cig.

Ringo: *jokingly.* I don't know. Sounds like you have some anger built up, young man.

John: Oh, shut up, Ringo.

George: I still think you burned that poor bird's house down.

Paul: Was it based on a true story?

John: What? No!

Ringo: I think it was.

John: No, it wasn't! I would never burn someone's house down!

George: We don't believe you.

Paul: Nope.

John: Okay, I've had enough of Rubber Soul. Next! Revolver.

Ringo: The cover is amazing.

Paul: We have Klaus to thank for that.

John: My nose isn't THAT long, though.

George: It also looks like I have lipstick on. What's up with that?

Ringo: Lovely record. "Tomorrow Never Knows" is genius.

John: Aw, thank you, Ringo.

Paul: I rather like "Taxman."

George: You're only saying that because you did the solo.

Paul: No, I like the lyrics, too.

Ringo: *sings.* Let me tell you how it will be . . .

John: *joins in.* There's one for you, nineteen for me.

Paul: 'Cause I'm the Taxman, yeah, I'm the Taxman.

George: I like "Yellow Submarine." It's the ultimate kids' song.

Ringo: *snorts.* Yeah, SURE, it is. Your kid absolutely LOVED it.

George: Well, besides Dhani.

John: Your kid is a wimp, George.

George: *head snaps around in his direction.* What did you say?

John: Nothing.

Paul: *hurriedly.* Sgt. Pepper.

George: I love how we have all of our idols behind us.

John: Well, not ALL of them. *looks directly at the camera.* To those of you who turned us down because you wanted to be paid: SOD OFF!

Ringo: They're probably all dead, John.

Paul: Moving on! I love how it starts with our Ringo.

George: What are you talking about, Paul? That's not Ringo; that's Billy.

John: What?

George: Billy Shears.

John: Oh, yeah. Hey, why didn't we get stage names? Ringo got one!

Paul: I guess you should have thought of that.

Ringo: One of my favorites is "Being for the Benefit of Mr. Kite."

George: You can smell the sawdust.

John: I like "Getting Better." I don't like the part where you beat your wife, though, Paul.

Paul: I think you wrote that.

John: Did not!

Paul: Did too!

John: Did not!

Paul: Did too!

John: Did! Not!

Ringo: *yells.* Both of you, shut up!

George: I don't like how no one wanted to be on my song.

Paul: Well, you were doing that boring Indian stuff.

George: Boring?!? How dare you! Don't you ever call it boring again!

John: The song turned out well, though.

George: *crosses his arms.*

Ringo: This is a sore subject. Let's go to Magical Mystery Tour.

John: Two words: higher than a kite.

Paul: John.

John: *sarcastically.* Yes, dear?

Paul: That's four words.

John: No, it's not. Higherthan akite. There. See? It's two words.

Ringo: I like our costumes.

George: I forgot which one I am.

John: Well, we all know Paul is the walrus.

Paul: Stop trying to start more controversies, John. You're the walrus. I'm the hippo.

John: *snickers.*

George: *remains serious before joining him.*

Ringo: I think they're talking about you being fat as a kid.

Paul: *explodes.* I WAS NOT FAT!!!!!!!!!! I WILL MURDER YOU ALL IF YOU SAY IT AGAIN!!!!!!

John:

George:

Ringo:

George: *clears his throat.* I like "I am the Walrus" a lot. My favorite part is, "Elementary penguin singing Hare Krishna."

John: Oh, really?

George: Yeah.

John: Good, because I was talking about you.

George: *glares.*

Paul: Um, well, I like "The Fool on the Hill."

Ringo: For me, it's "Blue Jay Way."

George: Thanks, Ringo.

John: I think "Your Mother Should Know" is stupid.

Paul: *gasps dramatically.*

Ringo: Why?

John: It's got lazy lyrics. Not very complicated.

Paul: Simplicity wins over in the end.

John: Not always.

George: Next, the White Album.

Ringo: Great cover.

John: Yeah, I don't know how we thought of it.

Paul: *pretends to wipe a tear from his eye.* It's beautiful.

George: I think it's nice that we put a collage and some pictures in there. Kind of a bonus.

John: Don't forget the serial numbers.

Paul: You got the first one, didn't you, John?

Ringo: No, I did.

Paul: But John was supposed to get the first one.

George: Ringo got to it before he did. John got the second one.

John: What?!? I didn't even notice! All these years I thought I had the first one! Bloody Ringo.

Ringo: I dig "While My Guitar Gently Weeps."

Paul: Me too.

John: I have one question: why are you moaning?

George: Because I am.

John: Do you have any idea what it sounds like? It sounds like you're being—

Paul: *cuts in quickly.* Whoa, whoa, whoa! This is a family friendly program. We're not going to say what it sounds like. Moving on. "Dear Prudence."

Ringo: Ah, beautiful.

John: Meh. I like "Everybody's Got Something to Hide Except Me and My Monkey" better.

George: Now THAT'S beautiful.

John: I know, right?

George: It's a song about you and your monkey. A true love story.

Ringo: It brings tears to my eyes.

Paul: Want to know what's also about some monkeys?

John, George, and Ringo: No!

Paul: "Why Don't We Do It In the Road?".

John: *scoffs.* I thought this was a family friendly program.

Paul: That song is art.

George: That song is hideous.

Ringo: It's got a good beat.

John: Anyway, moving on. Yellow Submarine.

Paul: It's got a colorful cover.

George: I don't really care much for this album. I mean, we only had four new songs on it and then the B-side was just instrumental stuff that George Martin did.

Ringo: Out of the new songs, I like "Hey Bulldog" the best.

John: *starts barking.*

Paul: *joins him.*

George: *rolls his eyes.*

John: I kind of like "It's All Too Much." Really deep lyrics.

Ringo: *sings.* Show me that I'm everywhere, and get me home for tea.

Paul: The tea part is really deep.

George: *flatly.* Ha, ha, ha.

Paul: Now we're going to go to—

John: Abbey Road?

Paul: *ignores him.* Let it Be.

John: Those were the most miserable weeks of my entire life.

George: Yeah, me too.

Ringo: We all know why George was miserable . . .

Paul: Don't get him started.

George: *stares off in the distance.* It all started when I saw her going over to my bag.

John, Paul, and Ringo: *groan.*

George: And then I saw her open my bag. She knew it was mine, but she opened it anyway.

John: We've heard this story a thousand times! Please stop!

George: *ignores him.* And she found my biscuits and she ate one. I swear my life flashed before my eyes.

Ringo: *bangs his head on the table.*

Paul: Are you done?

George: No. I haven't gotten to the part where I called her a—

John: No! We're not rehashing this!

Ringo: Let's talk about the cover.

John: Okay. Paul, that beard really needs to go.

Paul: What?!?

John: George, you look like you're going to eat someone.

George: No, I don't!

John: And, Ringo, you look sorry.

Ringo: Well, excuse me!

Paul: What about you?

John: WHAT about me?

Paul: What do you have to say about yourself?

John: Oh, yeah. I'm looking my usual fetching self.

George: *suppresses laughter.*

Ringo: *face twitches.*

Paul: *stares at him incredulously.*

George: Anyway, my favorite song on Let it Be is "Two of Us."

Ringo: *pretends to tear up.* It's a beautiful song.

John: Yeah. It's about me, right, Paul?

Paul: *chokes.* What? No!

John: Well, you wrote it when we were in the woods, didn't you?

Paul: Yeah, so?

John: We were in the woods.

Paul: What does that have to do with anything?!?

John: We. Were. In. The. Woods. Paul.

George: Is that code for something?

Ringo: This just got awkward.

Paul: I'm done talking about this. I like "Get Back."

George: I've been wondering . . . What is that even about?

Paul: Well, this guy's a loner, y'know, and he's knows it can't last, y'know, so he goes to California, y'know. And then there's Loretta Martin, y'know, and she thinks she's a woman, y'know, but she's another man, y'know.

Ringo: You just said the lyrics.

Paul: Yeah, because I don't really know what it's about either.

John: I think it's about Yoko.

Paul: Why?

John: Because every time you said, "Get back," you looked at her! I haven't forgotten that, Macca.

Paul: I wasn't doing that to disrespect, Yoko . . . I was . . . um . . . well, she had . . . um . . . something . . . on . . . her . . . face? *starts sweating.* Y'know?

George: Well, I think that's enough of that. Next up—

John: *yells.* Abbey Road!!! I've been waiting the entire episode for this! *starts hopping up and down in his seat.*

Ringo: The album cover is very recognizable. Everyone knows what Abbey Road is because of us walking across it like a bunch of ducks.

Paul: Way to ruin the originality, Ringo.

George: We WERE copying ducks.

John: Who are you talking about? Was there another band called the Ducks that walked across Abbey Road? I think not!

Ringo: No, we're talking about—

John: Let's just talk about the songs. "Oh! Darling" is one of my favorites.

Paul: Aw, thanks, John.

John: Savor that compliment because another one isn't going to come in the next lifetime.

Paul:

George: We can't forget "Here Comes the Sun"!

Ringo: That always puts me in a good mood. I also like the medley on the B-side.

John: I don't.

Ringo: Why not?

John: It's just mashed together aimlessly.

Paul: How dare you! The B-side of Abbey Road is art!

John: *rolls his eyes.* Whatever.

George: I like that no one was expecting "Her Majesty" because we didn't put it on the list of songs.

Ringo: That was kind of a "surprise!" moment.

Paul: Kind of like that last part in "A Day in the Life."

John: Heh heh heh. They all probably thought their new records were scratched! *starts cackling wildly.*

Paul: Well, that's it.

George: I'm glad that's over.