***Ace's POV***

                Everyone had a breaking point.

                I reached mine when I was 16 years old, sick of being under the control of my father. Sick of my aunt smacking me around when my father wasn't there to stop her. Sick of my cousin hitting me when he lost his temper. I was sick of trying to be a golden son to a father who would never let me reach that goal.

                By the time I hit my breaking point, I was overflowing with years and years of pent up anger. I began to talk back to teachers and deal back blows to my cousin.

                I didn't bow to anyone. Not anymore.

                It always threw me off when people did nice things. There was no reason to do a nice thing for someone who would never repay the favor. No reason to show kindness to someone you didn't even like.

                And yet Jack had given me the CD. He knew what I was about, but he did something nice anyways. He was a fool, and fools never lasted long in this world.

                I looked at the CD, opening it and looking at the date scribbled on the back. I couldn't understand Jack.

                Shutting the CD case, I set it down and got up. I left my bedroom and paused as I heard voices faintly drifting out of Ike's room.

                I crept over, pressing my ear to his door and listening. Ike never let people into his room.

                "...just saying that it's getting out of control." Jer's voice.

                "I don't know what you want me to do about it. I'm not Alexis." Ike.

                "We can't let this keep going. He's getting dangerous." Jer sounded angry now. "Man, I grew up with parents so hopped up on drugs that they couldn't think for themselves, but I was safer in that house than this one. He's going to start getting more physical about shit. Strike him, he'll only hit back twice as hard."

                "What do you want me to do about it, Jericho? You, me, and Christian, we got a few normal years before things went south. Not Ace. He never had a chance. He was born a goddamn tragedy."

                I clenched my fists. I wasn't some tragedy. I'd gotten myself out of that shitty situation and dragged every shred of my dignity with me.

                "Well if we don't do something, he's going to die a goddamn tragedy too. He'll just be another dead kid you skim over in the obituaries," Jer said.

                "All of us run that risk. We die, and who mourns us?" Ike said.

                "You still have a family. Besides, we mourn each other. You better mourn me when I'm dead, you piece of shit. I'm not afraid to haunt you," Jer threatened.

                "I'll see how you mourn Ace, first. At the rate he's spiraling down, it won't be long before he joins his dignity in death," Ike said.

                I stormed away from his door and down the stairs. I left the house, yanking the door shut as I went.

                I wouldn't be dead anytime soon. I was going to survive this life no matter what I came up against. I always had.

                Something felt different lately, though. It had felt different ever since Alexis had abandoned us. Maybe Alexis tore something when he left, but I would fix myself just like I always had.

                Always. Always. Al-

               "-ways a disappointment, Ace. Always! Al-"

                -ways keep myself together.

                I stopped walking and sat down on edge of the sidewalk, feet pressed against the road. I rested my hands on my knees, anxiously tugging at my shorts. Keep it together, Ace. Just keep it together. I'd figure something out to keep my mind at ease. I'd patch up the cracks in my brain that were letting these memories through.

                "Sufficient to have stood, though free to fall," I mumbled, reaching up and brushing my fingers against my beanie. I remembered reading that as a kid and asking my dad what it meant.

                "Men always lose their footing," he'd told me. "The higher the man, the longer the fall."

                I could remember sitting my room that night, my thoughts running wild. Beautiful things made men fall. Lucifer, Icarus...

                I stood up, sick of my thoughts. I wasn't in a beautiful heaven. I wasn't close to the sun. I wasn't Adam or Lucifer or Icarus or any man who had happiness in the palm of his hand. I was Ace Foley, I scraped away at the bottom of my own Hell, and I had a sturdy foothold.

                I moved, forced my legs to carry me down the sidewalk. A light breeze tickled at my face, blowing my hair across my forehead. I was still standing on two legs and I would move forward until I was cut down.

                Delaney's apartment came into view and I went up, ringing the doorbell and waiting. I listened as someone shuffled down the stairs, opening the door.

                "Ace," Jack said. "I can't believe I actually walked downstairs just to see you."

                I smirked at him. "I know I'm your favorite sight, Jackass. Where's Delaney?"

                "Not home." Jack stepped out, closing the door behind him and shoving me back. "Let's go for a ride until he gets back."

                I raised an eyebrow at him as he locked the front door. He turned back to me and noticed my expression, shaking his head.

                "No, no, no. I'm not trying to flirt with you," he said sternly. "Now get in the car and let's go. I'm bored and I've barely moved in the past two hours. I need to stretch and remember what sunlight is."

                I shrugged it off and got in the car with him, having nothing else to do without Delaney around. The thing about working all the time and trying to keep relatively unknown around town was that you tended not to have too many friends.

                Jack began to drive towards the plaza we had been at yesterday. He had plugged his phone in and music was playing out, a background noise that eased the silence between us.

                "Don't you work all the time?" he asked, as if reading my mind.

                "I work in the evening," I said, gesturing out the window. "This is daytime."

                "If I wanted sass, I'd go to someone funnier," he said.

                I snickered. "I think you're fond of me. Why else would you keep inviting me to hang out with you?"

                "We're not hanging out. I'm using you to kill time and you're using me to kill time. We're like parasites with a mutual benefit," he said.

                "A better relationship than I have with most people," I said.

                "So, what was with the bullshit story yesterday about you really having feelings for Dex?" he said.

                I nearly laughed. Of course I didn't have feelings for Delaney. I had been hoping Jack would be a sucker for that, but I guess not.

                "I have feelings too, you know," I said.

                "No, you have an IOU sign where your heart should be," Jack said.

                "That is probably true, but regardless," I said.

                Jack sighed and let the topic drop. He parked the car when we got to the plaza and the two of us got out. We went back into the same store as yesterday, heading over to the CD section again.

                "I'm a snob when it comes to music," Jack said, picking up a few CDs and scanning the backs of them.

                "Something tells me you're a snob when it comes to a lot of things," I said.

                Jack grinned a little, picking up more CDs. I copied him, looking through the CDs of bands that I liked, wishing I had the money to buy them like Jack did.

                "You ever been to a concert before?" I asked.

                Jack nodded. "Quite a few. Started going when I was a teen, haven't stopped. Dex goes with me nowadays. How about you?"

                "I wasn't allowed to," I said, looking back down at the CDs. "My dad said concerts were too dangerous." I couldn't help the smirk I felt making its way onto my face. "He was worried I'd get stuck in a pit or offered drugs or alcohol."

                "You doing drugs or drinking underage? No," Jack said in horror.

                "I am an angel and my body is a temple," I said.

                "Angels fall, temples crumble." Jack checked his cell phone for the time. "Sounds like you had an overprotective parent, though. That sucks. My mom can get like that from time to time. She's eased up a lot now that I'm 20."

                "I do whatever I want," I said.

                Jack glanced at me before gesturing to the CDs. "Close your eyes and take your pick."

                I closed my eyes. Grabbed a CD. Opened my eyes. Cinematics by Set It Off.

                Jack took the CD from me and we went up to the checkout. He paid for the CD and we got in his car. He put the CD in, driving back to the same spot as yesterday and turning the car off, letting the CD continue on.

                "I think I was 15 the first time I tried to seriously drink," Jack said after a few minutes of silence. "God, it tasted awful. But my friend and I, we choked it down because we wanted to be drinkers. My dad had the bottles marked but he never said anything. He just started offering me more drinks when we were home together, you know? Raise my alcohol tolerance and let me know that it wasn't this big off-limits thing. I got over the urge to drink, and fast. It bored me. It wasn't uncharted territory anymore."

                "I was 14," I said. I'd snuck into my dad's alcohol stash and gone for the vodka. "My dad figured it out the next day and, well, I never did it again." He'd hit me with the bottle, screaming about how I could've given myself alcohol poisoning, I was too young to be drinking, why was I so stupid, where had he gone wrong with me, why did I try to worry him like this. I should've taken a bottle with me when I ran away.

                Jack leaned back in his seat. "I got high when I was 16. Not a huge fan of it. Only done it a few times since then. None of that stuff interests me much."

                "I was 18," I said. I'd snuck into a bar and hooked up with a girl and her friends. We smoked together, they bought me some drinks, and Alexis eventually found my stoned and drunk self and dragged me home.

                "You know, I went to high school with these two guys. They were super close friends, pretty nice guys. But all they ever liked to do was drink. I'd see them hanging around outside of school and they'd be drinking constantly. One of them, he had a little brother who used to go out at night and just drink, get high, or get into fights, night after night. I always wondered how anyone could live like that. How is that fun?" he said. He pulled his hat off, tossing it into the back seat and running his hand through his hair. "All that shit, it's just a waste of time. I see Dex doing those things now and I just don't get why he's so into it. I don't get why you're so into it."

                "That's because you grew up with it," I said, feeling the anger starting to rear its head again.

                "I get that. I get that I'm a spoiled little brat. I'm just saying, there's better ways to waste your time. Have your drinks, have your drugs, have your sex, but have your youth, too. Alcohol, drugs, sex...those things are always there. But we're not young forever." He let out a long sigh. "What a pain, I sound like my mom."

                "Don't judge the way I live my life." I kicked my feet up on the dash, trying to let my body and voice be carefree and playful again.

                "You and Dex, you're similar. You're both just kids with no one holding your leash anymore," Jack said.

                "And you're a spoiled bastard who needs to keep his thoughts to himself," I said.

                "We're from different places," he said, shrugging. "I don't know exactly what you come from. But I come from a loving family who never left me wanting for anything. I don't have to bust my ass working all the time. My folks pay for my college and my apartment and things I need. Dex said you come from a single parent home. And, obviously, you have to work and earn for yourself."

                I couldn't help but laugh a little. "You don't know anything."

                "No, you're right, I don't. But you don't know about my life either, Ace. You think I've had it easy all the time. Money and love don't mean anything if something inside of you is broken," Jack said. He smiled a little. "Look at that, I'm being overdramatic again."

                Maybe he does understand.

                I shoved that thought right out of my mind. Jack didn't understand. He might talk like he did, but he never could.

                "If you were wealthy, what would you do?" he asked me. "I mean, if you won the lottery or some crazy shit."

                "Quit my job in a heartbeat and buy a damn car," I said.

                Jack laughed. "I'm not surprised."

                "What about you?" I asked.

                He thought for a moment. "Give half to my folks. I know, I know. How cheesy. But, whatever, they've been spending their money on me for 20 years. And trust me, I was a sickly kid. I drove up their medical bills like it was my job." He paused again. "Then I guess I'd buy a dog or something. And I'd buy a bible for Dex because that boy needs Jesus." He glanced over at me. "Make that two bibles. You could do with a little reading too."

                "I don't have time for books," I said, gesturing to myself. "Do I look like a reader to you?"

                "Yes," he said.

                "Huh?" I stared at him in confusion.

                "Don't tell me you were never a bookworm. You have the look of a guy who's trapped in his own head. Those are always the kind who turn to books. It's the only thing that helps you escape," he said.

                "Well, I'm not a teenager anymore. I don't read anymore. I don't have time to," I said, hating how he was right, hating all the long nights I'd spent longing to be the characters in my books, hating how I'd had to hide my books from my dad so he wouldn't take them away from me because they were "bad influences".

                "How did you meet the guys you live with?" he asked.

                "I met Alexis and Ike on the streets," I said, remembering the way Alexis had given me his food, unafraid of me hitting him. Ike hadn't trusted me, but Alexis had eased him into the idea of it. "Jer worked at a gas station we hung out at a lot. And we met Christian while waiting out rain in a cemetery." Jer getting off his shift and sitting with us every day. Christian visiting his parents' grave in the rain, surprised when Alexis offered him a jacket to keep him dry and warm.

                But Alexis didn't live with us anymore. He was gone and good fucking riddance to him.

                "So are those guys you live with all your best friends?" Jack asked me. "I love living with my best friend but I want to kill him half the time."

                I opened my mouth to reply but then snapped it shut, feeling a confused look coming to my face. I had never thought of it before, but I'd never had a best friend.

                My dad didn't like me hanging out with people because he said they were bad influences, so I'd never gotten close to anyone when I lived at home. And when I met the guys I lived with...well, we'd never tossed around the term "best friends" before. If anything, "brothers" came to mind.

                "I don't have a best friend," I said at last, forcing a grin. "What an overrated term."

                "Brothers, then?" he said. Seeing my look, he waved his hand dismissively. "I don't mean biological brothers. I mean the guys you live with. A brotherly bond. You love each other but you always want to strangle each other more often than not."

                "That's one way to put it," I said.

                Jack glanced at me. "You're frustrating. Sometimes you actually act human."

                "You're equally frustrating. You're cute but I can't stand you," I said.

                "Well, at least I'm cute."

                He reached over and turned up the music, ending our conversation. I sat there, wondering what the hell I was doing in Jack's car like this. All of this because I had gone to the bar one night.

                But here I sat, feeling calmer than I had recently. Jack didn't need to talk to ease tension. He just sat there, looking out of the window, lost in his own thoughts. We weren't awkward as we sat there. We were just two guys sitting in a car listening to some music. It felt almost...normal.

                Ha, as if someone like me would ever live a normal life. Maybe normal moments, but never a normal life. That was for people like Jack, who had good friends and family, who had privilege, who had stability.

                We listened to the music until we had played through all the songs. Jack let the CD start over before starting up his car and driving back towards the apartment.

                "You and Dex...what are you planning with him?" Jack asked.

                "I'm not planning anything," I said easily, leaning back. "I can have friends too, you know."

                "Do you even understand what friendship is?" he asked. "And I mean that seriously. Have you ever had real friends before?"

                "Of course." But...had I?

                I thought back to my school days. There had always been kids in school I played with in class, or talked to once we got older. But because my dad never let me have anyone over or go anywhere, I'd never gotten close to anyone. We'd been in-school friends only, if that even counted as friends.

                And the guys I lived with...Was that friendship? It's not like we hung out all the time. We lived together, we occasionally watched TV or played games together, and we mostly just barely managed to tolerate each other.

                "You're not convincing." Jack parked the car and ejected the CD, writing the date on the back. He tossed it to me and got out of the car without another word.

                I got out of the car and followed him into the apartment. I sat at the kitchen table as Jack opened the fridge and took out some orange juice, pouring himself a glass.

                "I'd offer you something to drink or eat, but honestly, I'm not your butler and you can get it yourself," Jack said.

                "You're quite charming," I said.

                "I'm well known for my amazing personality," Jack said and sipped on his orange juice.

                Jack hopped up on the counter, leaning against the wall and pulling out his phone. I traced my fingers in circles around the table in boredom, trying to fend off my thoughts.

                It wasn't until a little while later that we heard the door downstairs opening. Delaney appeared in the kitchen a few moments later.

                "Ace," he said in surprise.

                "He just showed up looking for you," Jack said without looking up from his phone.

                "Don't you have work soon?" Delaney asked, checking the time.

                "Soon," I confirmed. "But I have a little time to spare."

                "Look, I don't want to make you late for work. But we're going cosmic bowling tonight, if you want to come," Delaney offered.

                "No," Jack said. "No, no, no. We are not bringing him. Housemates only, Dex."

                "I'm inviting him. I doubt Nico will mind." Delaney gave Jack a look that challenged him to say no again.

                "No," Jack said, rising to the challenge.

                "Man, come on. We have extra coupons and it doesn't start until 10. Ace will be out of work," Delaney said. He narrowed his eyes a little. "I don't even know why I'm asking you. Ace, you're coming with us tonight. We'll pick you up and I'll pay for you."

                "Don't pay for him," Jack said.

                "What, are you going to say he's using me for my money? Because I offered," Delaney said.

                "This is what a broken home feels like," I said, laughing. "Quit arguing. I'll come. I'll text you when I'm out of work. Trust me, you want me to shower before I go anywhere."

                "Then it's settled," Delaney said, smiling, a smug look in his eyes as he glanced at Jack.

                "I'm going to beat myself to death with a bowling ball," Jack announced.

                "Wow, this really is going to be a great night," I said. Jack pleasantly flipped me his middle finger.

                "Do you want me to give you a ride home so you're not late to work? I can drive you to work if you want. I'm just assuming you have to change," Delaney said.

                I stood up with the CD in my hand and nodded. "Yea, sure."

                I walked over to Delaney, very much aware of Jack giving me a dirty look. I smirked and turned back to face him, giving him a cheerful wave.

                "See you tonight, Jackass," I said, winking at him before following Delaney out of the apartment.