MY FAVORITE SEASON OF THE YEAR always had been Autumn.

With yellow-lit mornings and leaves falling, when in youth and innocence you could simply just be.

Fall often did remind me of my childhood, with the way everything was so familiar.

Today was the first day of November and though I couldn't believe the year had already passed me by, for the first time it felt like I could finally catch my breath.

Sure, I was freezing my ass off but I had a hot coffee in one hand, and my daughter in the other.

She wasn't crying, or tugging on my hair, she was just resting against the warmth of my chest and too, was admiring the autumn haze.

You could hear the distinct faintness of birds chirping it reminded me of the last time I've felt peace—in my lonesome mornings in District 12.

It's pretty ironic, actually. How I've had both the worst and best times of my life in a place I was merely only visiting. Where I built a perfect life and watched it all crumble down.

My cold hand tugs the lavender-colored hat on Janus' head and out of her eyes, watching in peace as her breathing calmed with the wind.

I imagine a better life for us. Where she can grow up eternally carefree—similar to how I grew up. White picket fences, butterfly chasing in the backyard, happiness.

Away from this fucked up country and away from every cruel thing. Even if that's her blood.

BLAKELY SPEAKS !
y'all please don't even start with the whole "this chapter was so short 😭" shit. chapter forty six will be out tomorrow and it will be long and everything you could ever want 💕