Slow & Steady

Yoongi makes up for keeping you inside the cabin for the rest of the day with various things to distract you from your thoughts. From having wine and snacks sent to the cabin, to a quick stroll down the private beach to enjoy some sun. The clear ocean water felt refreshing after a stressful event that you couldn't resist dipping your toes in as you watched the sunset with Yoongi before dinner arrived.

The next morning, you woke up from your sleep with dozens of flower bouquets spread in the seating lounge, and a lavish breakfast waiting for you on the balcony. He then took you out to the private pool connected to the cabin to enjoy some leisure time under the sun. Set on the upper side of the hills, the pool area overlooks the ocean, with the pool edges opening to the oceanside to give you the illusion that you are floating above the water.

You enjoyed your time swimming with Yoongi by your side while looking at the sights around you, and then basked in the warm sun as the two of you sat back on the recliners, sipping on the expensive champagne that the staff sent your way.

As promised, you barely noticed the bodyguards lingering close by. The only time you truly noticed them had been the evening after the incident, right when they first arrived, with the head bodyguard—the tall man who had always been on Yoongi's side—greeting you and introducing himself to you properly for the first time. Yoongi's presence has helped you to forget about those men and the reason why they were here, as if nothing has really changed, and you were simply enjoying your time in paradise with your new husband.

Evening comes, and Yoongi surprises you once again when he invites you to a fancy dinner date, with a new offer of scenery as he takes you away from the cabin.

Yoongi holds your hand tightly in his as he guides you down the wooden walkway leading towards the decks by the seashore. The evening breeze is quite chilly, the skirt of your dress flowing smoothly around your legs as you slowly walk by his side, so Yoongi pulls you close to keep you warm.

But the breeze and the sudden proximity growing between you no longer become your worries once you start taking in the view around you. With the sun now mostly gone, the sky is tinged with streaks of pink and purple hues over the clear blue ocean. As the evening grows darker, soft lights are lit up along the wooden deck, spreading a soft golden glow across the floorboards.

The water here is steady, but you can still hear the sound of the crashing waves in the distance moving slowly against the beach. It feels calming, and the faint sound of music coming from the end of the decks seems to add to the ambience that calms you on the inside.

You continue to walk down the long, winding wooden deck until the part where it bends, and you reach a line of water gazebos standing near the end of the deck, rising from the ocean. A few of the gazebos seem to be occupied, and Yoongi takes you a bit further away, until you are at the very end of the walkway, where the water gazebo has a fancy candlelight dinner set at its center, and it has its own small private deck facing away from the rest.

A tall man dressed in all black is standing right by the side of the gazebo, along with a couple of staff members ready to serve you. You recognise him as Yoongi's main bodyguard, yet you can barely pay attention to him, too overwhelmed with the whole setup that you are seeing as you enter the gazebo.

"This is...too much, Yoongi," you muse as you take a seat on the chair that Yoongi has pulled out for you. Your husband only laughs softly as he gently pushes your chair back in place.

"I'm simply keeping my promise to make your stay with me worthwhile," he replies calmly as he takes his seat right across from you, before he nods towards the waiter to come and serve the meal. "And I also promised to spoil you during our honeymoon trip, did I not? Since I have yet to take you to that romantic dinner I promised you a while back, it would only be right to have it here."

You miss your chance to say anything in return when the waiters begin serving the dinner course. Once again, the bodyguard steps away, blending in the shadows while you begin to enjoy dinner, though you still know that he is still there to keep you both safe.

The dinner flows nicely once it begins. The dinner course is lovely, the champagne gives you the right buzz which helps you relax and enjoy the moment, and Yoongi acts like the perfect company who constantly fills the moment with light, flirty banters and laughter that allows you to forget for a little while everything else that seems so insignificant outside of this lovely dinner—the marriage agreements, the facade that you are working so hard to put on, and the broken promises you made about avenging your family.

All that matters in this moment is you, your husband, and the sparks you feel exploding all around you. The connection you feel building between you and Yoongi feels intimidating. A part of you is afraid to give in, while there is another part of you that is starting to wish you could just ignore everything else and simply let it flow.

The golden glow of the flames dancing from the tops of the candles around you feels mesmerising, and so does the soft tune of music echoing from somewhere around the beach. By the time you are done with dessert, you cannot resist Yoongi's offer to take your hand and pull you away from the table, as he guides you to the private deck for a simple dance.

"I may not be the best dance partner in the world, but I remember us dancing to this song on our wedding day," he muses as he pulls you close to his chest, his hand resting on your waist while the other is holding your hand on the side as he gently starts leading you to a slow dance.

Warmth creeps across your cheeks when you recall the first dance you shared on your wedding day. You barely remember everything else from that night, but the dance was the part of the event which has been ingrained in your memory as the first moment you shared as husband and wife.

"I vaguely remember," you retort with a smile as you place your free hand on his shoulder, "And I remember you dancing quite well during that time. Although I'm not opposed to leading the dance if you want me to."

Yoongi slowly shakes his head. "As tempting as it is to have you lead, I'd prefer to have the hours I spent taking those private dance lessons into good use and not just for the wedding day."

To think that Yoongi would have gone through such lengths for your wedding that he even got himself a dance lesson amuses you, so much so that you cannot help but laugh, but are amazed at the same time. "If you say so, then the floor is yours."

With a smug grin on his face, Yoongi pulls you even closer and starts leading the dance. As you slowly move together with him, you are surprised to find some comfort in his warmth that you simply want to lean in. You are no longer feeling awkward with his touches, and he seems a bit more relaxed when he is with you, even if you cannot always know what he is thinking when he is with you.

You lift your gaze to find Yoongi's, noticing him looking at your face intensely as you both sway together with the music. For a moment, neither of you says a thing, until you feel him lowering his head, a soft sigh leaving his lips, before his words come out of his lips in a low timber, "Do you still think about him?"

Taken aback at his question, you open your eyes wider to return his gaze. There is no need for Yoongi to say his name outlaid to know who he is talking about.

You press your lips together and divert your eyes. You trace the lapels of his jacket with your fingers as you try to think of an answer. "I can't say that he never crosses my mind," you slowly admit to him. You may not have been keeping your late ex-fiance in your thoughts the whole time—you have every reason not to think about him—but it's impossible to avoid having him appearing in your mind from time to time, especially when that man was the reason behind everything that is happening in your life right this moment.

"But he stopped becoming my main focus once I've set up my mind to move on, and he barely crosses my mind ever since our wedding, except for the times someone brings him up again," you slowly add, before looking up to meet his gaze one more time. "I hope you don't mind me being honest. I don't want to lie to you or hide things from you."

Yoongi's gaze softens. "I respect your honesty, and I completely understand," he says, with a gentle smile on his face. "People handle grief and losses differently. There is no timeframe or rules about how a person should grieve their loved ones, let alone when it comes to grieving the life you had and the person you were when they were still around."

Your chest feels tight after hearing his words. Everything he just said rings true. When Jinyoung passed away, not only did you lose the man who was supposed to be your future husband and the future that was promised to you, but you also lost the life that you've known, and the person you were before he was gone. There was a piece of you that you lost after he died, and you are still searching for that piece right now, as you are slowly treading your way to build a new future for yourself.

"Sounds like you are speaking from experience," you whisper with a sad smile, earning a soft chuckle from your husband.

"Life always gives us the lessons we need to survive."

"Wise words," you muse softly with a smile. But as silence falls between you in the next moment, you begin to wonder just what kind of grief he might have experienced to have the slightest understanding of what you've gone through. Then, just as you silently start wondering about his past, a certain kind of grief comes to your mind.

A grief that comes from a future that Yoongi had once lost, long before he was reunited with you again.

"Do you ever think about her?" A certain fight which happened in a dark garden on the night of your engagement ball echoes in your head. "Have you ever wondered—?"

Yoongi tilts his head. A knowing smile spreads across his face as he cuts you off. "Are you asking about Bora?"

You immediately shut your mouth. All of a sudden, you feel like a fool for even questioning him about this. You want to smack your head for forgetting your promise to never let yourself be bothered by his past love life. It was a promise that you made to reassure him that you would never involve yourself in his private life beyond what was necessary for you to do, and that you were never going to cause any drama in his life if things never developed between you.

But you have only made that promise only because you have already learned enough about his past love life. Enough to know that his reputation with the women in his life before you came into the picture had been nothing but a front; women with excellent reputations that would be able to help sell Yoongi's image in public by showing his connections to them, and vice versa.

But everything was different with Bora Kim.

Bora Kim was the only woman that Yoongi had claimed to have a real relationship with. The only relationship he ever made public, before all the drama which unfolded afterwards ruined everything. Still, she never came to your mind, knowing how it all ended, until the sudden appearance she made on your engagement ball and the conversation you overheard that night made you start questioning everything.

Yoongi gently brushes his thumb across your cheek, breaking you out of your thoughts and bringing your eyes back to him. "Forgive me for causing such doubts. Everything between me and Bora Kim had ended a long time ago, so I was also caught off guard to see her ambushing me on our engagement ball. I should've handled things better, too. Maybe if I had, it wouldn't be bothering you this much."

You slowly shake your head. "I'm not blaming you for what happened. You can't control someone's actions," you argue. "Has she ever tried to contact you again after that night?"

"Thankfully, no. But I've warned the people in the company and my security details to make sure that she'll never be allowed anywhere near you and me, not even our family."

You give him a small smile, even if you can still feel a nagging unease settling in your stomach. "What really happened between the two of you?"