If perfection came with a price...will my happiness come with one too?

╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳

Fuyuko observed her son
as he helped her around the kitchen,
noticing a ghost of a smile quickly disappear
when he noticed her gaze.

She clicked her tongue in annoyance,
causing Ryuu to react to the sudden noise
only to resume his work.

Let him have his fun.
Once those photos go out we'll see if he can crack another smile again.

She devilishly grinned to herself,
satisfied and delighted at the torturous idea
that she concocted.

╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳

Ryuu hastily entered his room,
eager to be out of his mother's company at once.

He jumped onto his bed
and buried his head in his pillow,
childishly flailing his limbs,
letting out a scream into the pillow
as he recalled the events that had happened earlier.

Just before he could let out another scream
his phone rang and he immediately check the caller's ID.

Shou?? That's weird.
He's never called me before...
but I guess I should answer it, it might be important.

"HEY THERE YUYU!!
IT'S ME! THE EVER-HANDSOME SHOUTA!
DOESN'T THE NICKNAME I MADE FOR YOU SOUND CUTE??
ANYWAYS, I JUST FELT LIKE CALLING YOU BECAUSE
I JUST REALIZED I'VE NEVER CALLED OR TEXTED YOU ONCE.
I CAN'T LET MAKOTO AND CHOU HAVE ALL THE FUN CAN I?
SO, HOW YA DOING?"

Shouta was speaking so many words quickly,
it amazed Ryuu how he hadn't lost his breath yet,
not to mention Shouta was almost screeching.

"Calm down, Shou. My ears hurt now.
The hell man?? Why'd you call at this hour?
And I'm fine, thank you for asking."

Ryuu put the phone closer to his ear this time,
hoping that Shouta would stop screaming,
sighing and chuckling at the blonde's jubilant behavior.

"Well...I missed you."

On the other end of the phone,
Shouta comically poured and made his voice sound cuter,
causing Ryuu to cringe.

"Ew, man. Gross!
Stop pulling my leg, would ya!"

Despite cringing at Shouta's cutesy voice
Ryuu ended up laughing—
Shouta just easily had that effect on people,
he could easily lighten their moods.

"Fine, fine.
So, I'll cut to the chase then.
It's Makoto's birthday tomorrow,
and I want to— I mean I want us,
you, me, and Chouchou
to do something special for her!"

Behind his cheerful demeanor,
it actually pained Shouta to talk to Ryuu—
the man worthy of Makoto, his required love.
But if it was for Makoto's happiness,
he would gladly yield her to Ryuu
even though it tore at his heart
every single moment of his existence.

"That sounds great, Shou!
So what do you have in mind?
I mean, you've known her longer than we have."

"Well, Ryuu, I do have something in mind.
Chouchou pitched in as well.
I've got all the stuff we need, but someone'll
have to distract her while we get the stuff
and the pizza ready...I'm think you could do that?
Is that okay with you, Ryuu?"

Shouta made sure to ask for Ryuu's permission first,
not wanting to impose or make him feel forced to—
he never wanted anyone to feel that way,
especially after he realized how Makoto had felt about him.

"Sure, man!
You can count on me.
And, Chouchou?? That sounds so tacky.'

"Hey! Chouchou is a cute nickname for Chou!
And thanks Ryuu."

"Anytime, Shou,
anytime."

"No, really.
Thank you, for everything,
for helping Makoto,
for helping her regain her joy.
Thank you."

Shouta's tone turned serious
and tears started forming around his eyes
so he immediately ended the call.

╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳

The tears slid down
r
e
l
e
n
t
l
e
s
s
l
y.
He felt his heart
s l o w l y
c
r
u
m
b
l
i
n
g.

He knew it was over.
He knew that Ryuu had won Makoto's heart since the beginning.

But why is so hard for me to accept it?
Why is it so hard to believe that it would just end like this?
I'm nothing but a friend to her, but at least I can still be by her side.

Ryuu was the man I was never, and the man I will never be—
he's the one that Makoto needs, so I mustn't be selfish.
Cracking jokes and making her laugh isn't going to cut it—
she needs someone who understands her like he does.

He stared at the ceiling, carefully assessing his thoughts.

He knew there was no error in them,
they were all true.

But even so, I won't give up.

╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳

Ryuu blankly stared at the screen of his phone, at the ended call,
blinking continuously,
he wondered why Shouta had become so sentimental all of a sudden.

What was that about?

But he shook it off
and went to sleep,
not knowing the weight of Shouta's words
and not understanding them either.

╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳

Fuyuko sat on her side of the bed,
staring at the smuggled photos of her son
and the Kazehaya heir.

Imagine what I could get from this.

Just then she felt a sharp pain
spread throughout her head,
and instinctively,
held the area where it hurt.

Her head throbbed
and she began to hyperventilate
as she looked over to the pills on the table.

She'd been laying off her medications for a while,
and it wasn't doing her good—
she'd been constantly having recurring nightmares,
flashbacks, and frequent panic attacks.

She quickly reach out to the pills,
and swallowed one.

Sweaty and disheveled,
she tucked herself under the covers
and uncomfortably drifted to sleep.

╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳
.
.
.
A young girl with black hair worn into pigtails
walked into her classroom
only to be greeted by the same scenario again—
the disapproving stares of her classmates.

She timidly grinned at them,
naive and unaware of their negative views on her—
her innocent mind hadn't quite grasped the idea
of "hatred" and "negativity,
so she reacted to their menacing glares
with an innocent, unknowing smile
which naturally weirded her classmates out.

And so the nickname "Weirdo" was associated to her.
It followed her from primary school, to elementary,
and even until high school.

Until something in her changed—
something in her personality changed.

She decided she would no longer yield to anybody—
she gave up her innocence for power,
she became a monster to end the pain.

Third year of high school,
the girl's black hair was no longer worn into pigtails,
rather, pulled into a ponytail this time.

Her once rounded, bright eyes and radiant smile
we're now replaced with sharp, fierce eyes and a strong expression.

Everyone feared her—
no one dared touch her.

The bullying stopped and it had amazed her.

So this is how it is?
If I act rude people show me respect,
but when I act nice people treat me like dirt?
What a foolish world we live in.

No one could approach her
without being scalded by her terrifying gaze.

That is, until one day,
a guy approached her—
he was a quiet, timid fellow,
just as she once was.
He too was frequently picked on,
just as she once was.

They were on the same page,
yet they were so different now.

The ambiance of the room was calm,
and they were the only ones present.
Silence filled the room.

In a calm manner the boy spoke.

"Himura-san,
what happened to you?"

The boy's question struck her,
her threatening gaze slowly faded away,
and she thought long and hard
before finally giving her answer.

"I...I've changed a lot,
haven't I?
I'm no longer the ditzy girl I once was.
I've changed, and people fear the new me."

"That doesn't mean it's what you have to do.
You don't have to change."

Her eyes widened,
a wave of shock washed over her.

She stopped staring at her desk,
and swiftly turned to him in disbelief.

"Just because others don't accept you,
doesn't mean you have to turn your back on yourself too.
Himura-san, you were already good even back then.
.
.
.
Remember when you helped me out
even though others were picking on me...
and they ended up picking on you too?

Himura-san, that's who you really are."

She turned back
and stared at her desk again,
a forlorn smile formed on her lips.

She hopelessly sighed
and stared at the ceiling.

"What was your name again?
Kurosawa Ryuu?"

He cleared his throat
and adjusted his glasses,
slightly annoyed by the girl's mistake.

"It's Kurosawa Ryouta actually."

"Oh...
sorry.
I'm —"

"Himura Fuyuko.
I know."

Silence filled the room again.

"Why won't you look at me?"

"I don't trust you."

"Well then...I'll prove myself to you.
It's getting pretty late now,
shall we go, Fuyuko-chan?"

The girl smiled and took the boy's hand,
and they walked home together,
and the day after that,
and a year after that,
and 4 years after that.

.
.
.

The girl was now in a hospital bed,
holding her child,
sweaty and disheveled from the pain of laboring.

She looked to her side and smiled at her husband.

He took her hand
and spoke.

"We're parents now,
Fuyuko."

He tenderly smiled at the newborn—
at his son.

"We are,
Ryouta."

She laughed
as he kissed her forehead
and tucked her hair behind her ear.

"I love you,
Fuyuko."

"Mm."

The nurse entered the room
and smiled at Fuyuko and Ryouta.

"What would you like to name your child?"

The nurse asked,
and Fuyuko replied right away.

"Ryuu."

Her husband, Ryouta,
perked up at the mention of the name.

"Isn't that the name you mistook mine for?"

"It is."

"Wonderful choice, Mr. and Mrs.
It's a beautiful name."

The nurse wrote the name down
and left the room.

Fuyuko looked at the baby
she held in her arms.

This was her son—
Ryuu.
And she vowed to protect him
and give him only the best,
no matter what it took and what she had to do.

I'll do anything and everything for you, my child.
No matter how hard or even if it pains you,
I'll do it...
for you, my dear.