JOEL HAD SMACKED ELLIE ON THE BACK OF THE HEAD FOR HER SNIDE REMARK, and then picked up the pace to follow after the duo ahead of them, entering the large building to find it completely abandoned apart from the Zhenyas in the middle of it, rifling around through files and speaking to each other loudly.

'The hell are you two doing?' Joel demanded, wondering why he was the only one who understood the danger they might be in.

'Yeah, funny thing.' Ralph crossed his arms, loading up one of his jokes and staring at Joel with an irritated expression. 'A grumpy little ogre took my gun. So, now I am completely defenseless in this big, scary Firefly terrorist laboratory. Which, by the way, is totally fucking empty.'

'Yeah, maybe a grumpy little ogre wouldn't have to take your gun if you were an honest man, ya snake.' The incessant nagging was beginning to get to Ralph, and that combined with the flourish of his most prized pistol really bugged him. It showed on his face, and Joel cut his mocking short, but Ralph was still glaring at him as he held the sheet he was holding up to the sky, not even glancing at the paper.

'Packing list.' He said simply, holding it out towards Joel with a frown and looking up to the top floor when a rattle came from a distant room. They looked back down at the same time, staring at each other right in the eye before Joel looked away first and snatched the list from him.

He looked over it once, quickly, before he headed towards the stairs and nodded at Ralph to follow. Reluctantly, he did.

Two flights of stairs later, they had located the continuous sounds and were approaching the room that they were coming from with care. Joel was at the front of the group with Ralph close behind him, making sure that Lou and Ellie didn't get themselves killed by some unknown force while they were securing the area.

He pushed the door open with a bit of resistance and Ralph peered over his shoulder to find three monkeys clattering around with lab equipment. They scattered as Joel entered the room, fear disappearing in the blink of an eye. Ralph almost pushed past him trying to get a look at the animals before they scampered away. Joel had to cover a smile with a cough.

'What monkeys were those, Ralph?' Ellie asked with a grin, excited about seeing the creatures up close and personal, even if it was for only a moment.

'Scary ones.' He joked. He let his nerdiness get the best of him not even a second later. 'My best guess is some kind of baboon or chimpanzee. You can tell 'cause they have bright red butts.'

Lou giggled an excessive amount at that, laughing even more when Ralph explained that female baboons have red butts to make mating easier, and then Ellie began to start too. The two of them continued to chuckle as they spread out across the room, letting Ralph and Joel know what corners of the room had been overtaken by the smiling idiots, and forcing them to stand together at the only end of the room that wasn't being explored.

Joel looked at the big bulletin board ahead of them, a map of the country on it with various colored pins making up a trail to Salt Lake City, Utah. Next to it, a smaller pin with a note attached to it spelled St. Mary's. Joel looked at Ralph curiously.

'What?' Ralph whispered at him. 'They don't tell me anything. I kill the people, they give me the money, that's that, I swear to you! I'm not even one of them. I was doing to it survive - How many times do I have to tell you this?'

'However many times it takes you to not sound like an asshole when you're doing it.' Joel huffed, lowering his voice and stepping to the far side of Ralph to make room for Ellie and Lou. 'They're in Salt Lake City. Maybe getting ahead of the weather, or for better facilities? I dunno.'

'Marlene didn't warn you?' Ellie asked Joel, looking up at him. He wanted to make some dig about how she'd be better off asking Ralph that, since he knew so much about the woman, but didn't.

'Wish she would've.' Joel grumbled to himself, reaching into his pocket for Ralph's pistol when there was a distant shuffling out in the streets below them.

Ralph was the first one on the scene, looking down through the broken glass and watching a group of four or five men stomping along the muddied path beneath them, each one of them carrying a weapon of some sort in clenched fists. They had their hoods up, unrecognizable from this height, but they still seemed like they were up to no good.

'They don't look like Fireflies.' Lou said softly, standing alongside her dad in front of the broken window, standing on her tiptoes to get a better view.

'They aren't FEDRA either.' Ellie added on, shaking her head as the group continued around the side of the building and out of sight, headed in the direction of the entrance.

'Out the back, come on.' Ralph ordered briskly, waving at everyone to do as he said.

...

THANKS BE TO GOD, their horses were still there by the time they left the building. Otherwise, they'd have to spend the rest of the evening searching for a car or some other mode of transportation. Or they'd even have to start the dreaded cycle of walking all over again.

With a frantic hop, Lou snatched Geronimo's leash down from the tree her dad had secured it in and handed it to him, forcing him to be the one to calm the animal while she looked around to make sure that no enemies were approaching.

'Dad!' She screamed when she spotted one just as the man hiked a baseball bat over his shoulder and swung right for Ralph's head. Her dad had ducked in the nick of time and the bat snapped in half when it connected with the tree nearest to him.

Joel tackled the guy, wrestled him against the tree, and got in a few punches here and there as Ralph ushered Lou onto the horse and snatched Ellie's revolver off of her, hoping she had picked up some ammo while they were in Jackson otherwise this would go miserably.

He turned back around and spun the barrel, ready to aim and fire when it was needed, but Joel had already snapped the man's neck and was dropping him onto the dirt like it was no biggie. Apparently, Ralph was the evil one.

Joel turned around, reaching into his pocket after making the smart decision to hand back the pistol, but found himself frozen at the sudden, sharp pain in his gut.

The rest of the group were already wide-eyed and speechless, staring at the handle of the broken bat that was piercing right through the side of Joel's stomach and unsure of what to do.

Without even thinking about it, Joel wrapped his hands around the chunk of wood impaling him and began to tug at it. He pulled it out of him with a small groan, and immediately started to regret it when the pain duplicated and he was now trying to stop blood from pouring all the way down his shirt and onto his hands.

'Joel, get on the horse!' Ellie yelled frantically when she spotted the remaining men running towards them. Ralph rushed forward to help him, not even caring about the blood that was drenching his hand as he pressed his palm over Joel's wound and angled his shoulder under Joel's arm, lifting him upwards. Ellie hopped on after him with a little bit of hassle and a lot of time taken, meaning Ralph had to turn around and buy them some time.

He fired a bullet at the one in the front and got him straight in the knee, and he aimed another shot at the man next to him but missed by a mile. He rolled his eyes and groaned.

There was a reason he was so good with that pistol, but he wasn't about to snatch it off of a half-conscious Joel. He had some morals, and robbing his dead sort-of boyfriend wasn't high up on his To-Do List.

He got the third one in the shoulder, a narrow hit, and the final one seemed to have accepted his fate now. He was slowing down and looking back at his friends as they lay on the ground, bleeding and groaning, with the one that Joel had killed laying there motionlessly.

Ralph didn't seem concerned by his terror, he just hopped on his horse and called it a day.

...

'THEY'RE NOT FOLLOWING US.' Ellie panted softly, adrenaline still in her blood as she turned around and stared at the Zhenyas for confirmation. Ralph nodded his head once, confidently, and Ellie didn't want to go into detail about what he had done. 'I think we're safe. You two okay?'

'Yeah, we're fine.' Ralph nodded briskly. 'Are you?'

'I'm good.' Ellie mimicked him, reaching forward and stopping short of patting Joel on the shoulder when she heard him making these weird, pained, wheezing sounds. 'Joel? Joel, are you- Holy shit!'

Out of the blue, Joel hit the snow with a thud. His eyes were heavy, his face was pale, and there were heaps of blood painting the front of his shirt and the palm of his hand in his attempts to stop it from spilling.

Ellie was the first one by his side, repeating his name worriedly and placing her hands on his chest in some form of panic. Lou and Ralph didn't take more than a second, kneeling in the snow beside her and brainstorming this situation.

'Joel. Joel, please, you gotta get up.' Ellie begged him, searching his face for any sign of life or movement or anything. There was a glint in his eyes, a reflection of the light as he stared at Ralph with his eyebrows furrowed in the slightest.

Ellie hadn't been paying much attention to the man next to her, and looked over to find that the maniac was taking off his coat and pressing his button-up over Joel's wound, leaving him in a tank top in sub-zero weather. That seemed to be the least of his concerns. He was too occupied with comforting Joel, quickly and quietly and practically incoherently.

Joel let out a whine when Ralph's hands pressed against the gash on his stomach, a shaky hand reaching up to collide with his wrist, a weak attempt to shove him away. After the initial move, Joel didn't pull his hand away. He held onto Ralph's forearm loosely, the last thing he did before his eyes drifted shut and his mumbles of pain drifted off.

'Ralph, what the fuck do we do!?' Ellie yelled, staring at him with tears in her eyes, her bottom lip quivering. She was scared, the poor girl was terrified, and he didn't blame her one bit. He knew he was keeping it together, he hoped he was, but inside, he was just as scared.

'I... We-We keep him someplace, till he's better.' Ralph looked over at Lou, who had been frighteningly quiet throughout his whole ordeal. He nodded his head down at Joel. She knew where this was going and shook her head rapidly. 'Help me lift him. Don't argue, just do it.'

After a moment, Lou rubbed her teary eyes and got to work.

...

NOTES!
u know whats crazy?? xylophones