xlii. the heart wants what it wants
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BITTERSWEET
:: xlii. | the heart wants what it wants
It was the next day and the two cooped up in a hotel for the time being. They weren't sure when they would go back to work and school, but are willing to take this mini vacation from being away from home. Though there was nothing going on that day, that didn't stop Vanessa from getting up early and Cole sleeping in.
It was eight in the morning when Vanessa woke up and also when she heard a knock on their room door. She got up from under the covers, hopped off the bed, and made her way to the door. With the twist of the knob, she pulled it open and jj stood out there with her purse in hand.
"I'm sorry if I woke you." She whispered.
"You're fine. Let's talk out here." She stepped out the room, the door quietly closing behind her.
"Hope you're settling back ok." Jj smiled, "And I have an offer. Until you guys get back on your feet, you can stay with me and Henry."
Vanessa shook her head, "We wouldn't want to impose."
"No, you won't be." Jj put her hand on Vanessa's arm, "And I insist." She continued, "Also I came because you said you wanted to talk and well, I have a free hour. Coffee?"
Vanessa nodded, "Give me five minutes."
She used the keycard to open the door and walked in, closing it behind. After actually about ten minutes, she walked out the bathroom all dolled up for the day. Then she wrote a note for Cole so she wouldn't worry when she woke up and found her mom gone.
After placing the note by Cole's bedside, Vanessa left out the door and into the hallway where jj waited. The two then began to head their way out the hotel and to the nearest coffee shop.
• • •
The two were finally seated with coffees in their hands. Jj had at least a little over thirty minutes before she had to head in, so she wasted no time at all.
"So, what did you want to talk about?" She took a sip of her coffee.
"Well . . " Vanessa adjusted herself, getting more comfortable, "It's about us and Savannah."
Jj nodded, "Oh."
"I thought about us a lot when I was away and I want to take that step. I know I'm with Savannah but I plan on talking to her too. I just really want to be with you, jj." Vanessa continued, "And the last time, you shot us down. I wasn't sure of this time but I'm more than ready now and I love you."
Jj didn't no what to say, she didn't know what to expect. She thought they were just going to catch up, but no, Vanessa decided to profess her love for the agent. It's not that jj didn't feel the same at all, but she's a nice enough person to at least let Vanessa see how it goes with Savannah first.
"I know this is probably not what you want to hear . . . "
"Oh my god." Vanessa placed her coffee on the table, "We're doing this shit again? If you don't want to be with me, just tell me to my face Jennifer."
"I do want to be with you, but I think you should give Savannah a fair try."
"Savannah and I haven't been in the same room for over a year and I don't love her." She mumbled towards the end, "I love you."
"And I love you. You have no idea. But I'll say this, when you're single, we'll revisit this discussion." Jj reached her hand out, "Deal?"
Vanessa took jj's hand in her's, "Yeah, alright."
Jj smiled with a light squeeze of Vanessa's hand, before she began standing up.
"I have to get going, but do me one favor." She tilted her head, "Don't ever think I don't want you. I'll always want you, even when we had that non talking period."
"You always know what to say." Vanessa spoke sarcastically.
And just like that, jj was off to the BAU, leaving Vanessa at the coffee shop to find her way back to the hotel where Cole might still be sleeping.
• • •
However though, vanessa's time back at the hotel was very short because she wanted to get this conversation with Savannah out the way already. So yes, she went to the school and walked the hallways to Ms. Charles' classroom. Luckily, Savannah didn't have a class in the early morning, that's one thing Vanessa remembered.
Being respectful as she can, she waited outside and knocked on the closed door. Just as that door opened, Vanessa couldn't believe that they spent one year apart but then again, they barley spent time together when they were in the same state.
"Hi . . " Vanessa spoke softly, "I figured you had a free class, so I wanted to talk. Is that ok?"
"Yeah." Savannah moved to the side, letting Vanessa in then closing the door behind her, "So what did you want to talk about? And also, I'm glad you're here because I wanted to ask if you would move in with me and Jonah."
Vanessa turned in her direction, "Did you? There's already a place me and Cole are staying."
Savannah walked back to her desk, "I know, the hotel. But you won't have to pay for a room with me."
"It's not that. Jennifer offered and I accepted. Me and Cole are staying with Jennifer for the time being."
"Did you think about me at all in making that decision?" Savannah was seated.
Vanessa ignored her question, "We grew apart and before all this happened, we barley saw each other. If we were lucky enough, maybe a dinner every other week."
"So that's a no?"
"I'm sorry that i said the door was closed and maybe in that time it was, but it reopened."
"I feel like you're trying to break up with me."
"Maybe I am." Vanessa mumbled.
"Can I ask why?"
Vanessa took a deep breath, "I love her and I want everything with her."
Savannah then stood back up, "Well then, I'll be a supportive friend on the sidelines wishing you the best."
"You're not mad?"
She walked around towards Vanessa, "Deep down I always knew your feelings for Jennifer was going to bite me in the ass, it was just the matter of when."
"I'm sorry."
"Don't be. At least now I can say that I got to date the beautiful Vanessa Reigns, because not many can say that." She shared a smile with the burnette.
"Whoever you end up with, she's going to be real lucky."
"Yeah, I know. I'm a catch, right?" Savannah lightly pushed Vanessa's shoulder in a playful manner but that quickly changed, "But on a serious note, I promise not to bring hell on Cole when she returns."
"Funny."
Savannah opened her arms, "I'm going to hug you now."
The two then shared an embrace, a bit of a long one. They knew it wasn't the last time of seeing each other, but it was the end of their romantic relationship and they knew that they would never get another go at it.
The two then pulled away and gave each other one last smile for now. Vanessa then was out the classroom door and now making her way back to her daughter.
And so it was official,
Vanessa was now a single woman and ready to mingle.
With Jennifer Jareau.
a/n:
jennifer jareau 🤭
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