P H A N T O M B L O O D

"Suck my cockiness, lick my persuasion."

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"Where'd he dig up these bruisers?!" Speedwagon yells, all of you watching as the two giant men emerge from the ground with Jojo awkwardly suspended on the rock above them.

Wait nevermind, only one of the men is actually holding up the rock... With one finger? You gulp slightly. The giant one with the horned helmet is... A bit of a threat to your continued living.

You glance over at the other guy with the really glossy dark hair- did they bury him with conditioner? He's not as intimidating for sure. People who wear diadems are never gonna scare you.

"Poco get to safety!" Jojo yells, Poco nodding and running off somewhere. Well, you're glad he's safe. Unlike the rest of you. You're all going to die.

"These are knights, casualties of Queen Elizabeth's fatal machinations in the mid fifteen hundreds against Mary Queen of Scotland," Dio announces dramatically before turning to address his zombie minions, "Heed me well, I find these humans vexing. I order you to destroy them. I care not how."

"You what mate-" You begin to yell, only to be interrupted by the giant knight breaking the rock, causing a bunch of little baby rocks to come flying at you.

"Tell me I'm dreaming! That big one broke the boulder with a single finger!" Speedwagon exclaims, accidentally hyping the two knights up more than his own companions.

"They're waiting for Jojo, he's their main target!" Zeppeli notes and it seems a true enough statement. Both knights are just staring around waiting for Jojo to fall back to the ground, "He's a warrior but he can't handle both of them. If only my blood would start moving a little bit."

"Then what Baron?" Speedwagon asks, crouching closer to the Italian. You narrow your eyes at the Baron in confusion, now is hardly the time for him to be... making moves on Speedwagon?

"Then I could heal my arm a little with Hamon. How am I supposed to thaw this damnable thing in time?" The Zeppeli curses.

"If it's heat you need, Speedwagon's feeling right charitable this evening," The honeysuckle blonde says, reaching for the bottom of his shirt and jumper.

"Let's not get too selfless just yet Robbie," You quickly rush in, lowering the street thug's arm before he could reveal more of his abs to the world, "Pass me your arm, Teach."

You take the Italian man's frozen arm and use your Hamon to get his blood flowing in a warm and sparkly flash. You grin at your temporary patient, "Y'know Zeppeli, people tend to have two arms for this reason."

"In case a vampire freezes one to stop Hamon from flowing?" Speedwagon asks, confused and tucking his jumper back into his trousers.

"Exactly! There you go Teach. Don't look at me like that! Here, I'll kiss it better," You move the Italian's unfrozen arm and kiss the top of his hand before standing back up to face the actual fight going on.

Behind you, Zeppeli mutters some Italian curse or something and slightly louder says, "You're my least favourite student."

"Looking at Jojo that's hardly an insult," You taunt, walking back over to the Joestar.

Or as close as you can get to the fight safely. The smaller knight's wrapped one of Jojo's arms up in with his hair and is... Using it to drink his blood? Ew?

You gag slightly and look over at the bigger knight who's drawing his massive sword. Like the sword is huge, gigantic, of extreme proportion, dozens of people probably spent hours making the bloody thing.

A bead of sweat rolls down your face in that typical anime sort of way as you glance back at Jojo and then at the large sword again, "... Do you think he's overcompensating for something?"

Jojo seems momentarily stunned, leaving you to awkwardly clear your throat. If the Joestar dies after that comment it'll be all your fault, so you nudge away the hair trying to eat his unmoving body. Was the joke really so bad it sent him into a vegetative state?

Speedwagon once again starts panic yelling weird exposition, "Eyeballin' that sword freezes me up worse than Dio just did. Jojo's well over six feet tall but next to that thing he must as well be tom thumb!"

It was true, Jojo was 6'5 last time you checked and that sword was definitely a giant chunk of steel compared to him. No wonder it scared poor little Speedwagon at 5'9. And for height reference that's The Rock and Vin Diesel.

"Look at the face on that one! And that one, he's the bleeding minotaur!" Speedwagon continues as you, Jojo and the Knights all sort of pose and wait for him to finish so the plot can continue, "I can read people like a book and these two are full of stories Speedwagon doesn't wanna hear, thank you kindly!"

"Don't worry Robbie, most books have endings, right?" You begin glancing over at Speedwagon through the reflection of the ridiculously ginormous sword of bigness. You grin at him when he catches your gaze, "I don't think this story is gonna work out happily for them."

Are you cringe or the coolest person to ever plant geraniums? Eh, who knows.

"You should feel honoured to perish at the hands of these men, Tarkus and Bruford. Bow to my will o' warriors of yore." Dio declares, once again posing menacingly in front of the moon.

'I wonder where in medieval Scotland yore is.' You think briefly before your focus is taken by the smirking blonde once again.

"The story of these brave knights' betrayal seems to have struck a chord with me," Dio begins and you've really got to wonder what part of himself he sees in the story because, well... Isn't he the one who betrayed the Joestars?

"From the earth, I call them to wreak their vengeance all these centuries later. Such is the power at my command!" The vampire speaks, everyone looking up at him instead of fighting, "In life they were fearsome, in death they are invincible!"

Okay, that's... Intimidating even for you.

"Argh, we have sworn fealty to lord Dio!" The ridiculously massively huge knight growls out, making you a lot less intimidated oddly enough. Maybe it's the pirate noises.

"We have come to lay waste to this world! It is a place without redemption!" The diadem wearing knight yells out.

Quite extreme these chaps. Maybe death affects morals more than it should.

"Ah! That hate they felt when they died, it had three hundred years to ferment!" Speedwagon exclaims. Both the knights growl and bare their fangs like they're gigantic vipers from hell, "Dio's turned the flower of knighthood into vengeful monsters! Keep your wits about you!"

'Turned the flower of knighthood into vengeful monsters?' You think, eyes widening significantly. If these medieval foes were nothing more than weeds in a shrubbery of graves, well, this is something you can handle.

It's something you're confident in handling.

Next to you, Jojo takes a deep breath, encouraging you to back up as he begins yelling, "Hamon within me come to my aid! Scarlet overdrive!"

His free hand becomes charged with a deadly red fistful of Hamon and punches the hair once again eating away at him. The bright glow surrounding the Joestar lighting up the night.

Nice.

The zombie and Zeppeli gasp, the Italian teacher going as far as to exclaim, "Look at that power!"

"Huh! He looks so calm! But I know they ain't far from his thoughts! All that he's lost and what he's rediscovered! God speed, you brave bastard!" Speedwagon clamours, hyping up his own team for once.

"Methinks this boy is a champion of his day. He shall make the perfect target upon which to practise the art of war!" The knight with the hair says as both knights pose together.

Normally you'd say something to try and convince the knight (and Dio) that Jojo isn't a walking talking bullseye to aim abuse at, but that's not an option at this point- this point being a third drooling zombie leaping for you and Jojo.

"These two's flesh belongs to me! Oh yes, I can smell their delicious cartilage already!" The random zombie yells, charging forward as you and Jojo back up.

"Another zombie?!" Jojo exclaims in the face of another threat. Luckily(?) the hair knight swoops in and scolds his fellow undead servant.

"Get thee gone from here! You glutton!" The knight tears the nose off the random zombie's face, posing with the stolen, sniffing cartilage as the noseless sufferer goes flying.

That's... Never a good sign. If you weren't so fond of Jojo you'd be glad the knight only really cared about him as a foe.

"Milord Dio! In this young man, I do sense a great 💫reservoir💫 of spirit!" The diadem wearing Scot yells up at his unimpressed revivor, "I humbly petition you for the right to face him in sole combat and strike him down!"

"As you will then," Is all the vampire responds with, looking down at the knight in boredom. What a knob, acting so mighty and unamused towards a fight he started.

"Milord Dio I petition you to stop being a little bitc-" You're sadly interrupted by a zombie trying to rip out your collar bone before you can insult the blonde further. Unlike with Jojo, neither of the knights seem bothered by your attacker so you finish it off quickly on your own.

"That's Bruford the Black Knight! He was known to be a flawless fighter! And he was utterly devoid of mercy!" Your teacher yells, prompting you to look away from the melting zombie who'd attacked you and towards the strutting zombie who's attacking Jojo.

'Golly his thighs are massive.' You think, gulping nervously.

"Just watching him put one foot in front of the other, I can tell he's no one to tangle with!" Speedwagon hollers... Making a pun? Did he even mean to do that? How could someone not love this funny little man? You would never know.

"Back in my school days, we learned about this man! He and Tarkus!" Jojo says, getting in a defensive position, "And now he returns from the dead to kill me? Relax your muscles, Jojo, breathe steadily no matter what!"

Aw fighting technique king. King of your heart fighty muscle man.

A distant rock falls and breaks in half. The moment it distracts Jojo, Bruford leaps up, charging into the air with his hands behind his back.

The Joestar says something you can't catch as Bruford uses his... Hair? Yes hair, to wield a blade. Slicing at Jojo and chopping a rock pillar in half. Your blue-haired man is thrown back and tumbles all the way into the lake.

"You've a keen eye, my boy, my hairs danse macabre has claimed many. Have at thee!" Bruford yells, jumping and following Jojo into the... Pink lake? How did it slip your notice that the colours changed?

'Shit.' You think, running to the edge of the cliff alongside Speedwagon and Zeppeli, "Jojo!"

"Oh no, he's at a serious disadvantage!" Zeppeli says informatively, "No air to breathe means no Hamon!"

'Shit shit shit shit.' Your mind really is the inner machinations of your enigma.

"We have to help him!" Speedwagon said, stating the obvious in your opinion. You all try to run forward but the massive knight jumping behind you has other plans.

"What now- this brute?!" The baron says angrily as the three of you you all turn back around.

"Damn he needs us and we can't lift a finger to save him!" Speedwagon curses.

"Fuck it!" You yell, moving in front of your companions, "You two try and aid Jojo! I'll distract this ugly son of a bitch."

'Think (Y/N), think. What do you know about Mary Queen of Scots?' You ignore your friend's protests and pull out the knife you'd knicked from the tunnel zombie.

It's a lot smaller than Tarkus' massive sword but that's okay, this isn't a metaphor for anything.

"(Y/N) you can't be serious!" Your teacher protests and you blank both him and your nerves.

"Shut your sauce-box Teach, you're the one who's all about courage right? That's what I'm tryna do here," You glanced back at the Zeppeli before smirking at the giant zombie looming over you, "So Tarkus, was it? Are you ready to get your zombie back blown out rough wooing style?"

It seems the small jab at his former Queen is all it takes for the hulking redhead to charge at you. Luckily for Speedwagon and Zeppeli, you moved away from them and well, Tarkus and his enormous sword followed.

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I'm kinda nervous to be writing a fight scene next chapter but oh well. (Y/N) vs Tarkus woo.

Speaking of woo, the rough wooing was a war between Scotland and England in 1542 where Henry VIII (six wife king guy) tried to weaken Scotland and get baby Mary Queen of Scots engaged to his son.

So yeah little fuck you for Tarkus.

Also not (Y/N) being a hypocrite and not letting anyone other than themself flirt in a fight. Smh. I give characters flaws.

Hope you enjoyed this chapter!