Hanji's POV

Levi told me to keep calm and rrelaxedwhile we were moving into our new house. The first thing he helped set up was the TV. He and Erwin moved a few things into the house, including the couch. While Raven and I sat at the TV, watching, the men were moving things. I couldn't carry something small, since Levi was afraid of losing the baby again. I couldn't argue with that.

By dinner, half of everything was done. 

Raven wanted to eat pizza, but Levi had to gently tell her that we couldn't because of the smell. I'm not too far along, but we didn't have pizza. Raven wanted spaghetti, but because of that rule, I protested against it. But surprisingly, Levi said yes. We were going to have spaghetti.

I helped with dinner, mainly cooking the noodles as Levi made the sauce. I loved this. We were a family again. Although Raven has to make new friends in her new school, this was perfect. We were closer to Jayden, and I will do my best to ensure that this baby will not be like him. I want this one to live a life like Raven.

Once dinner was done, Erwin and Levi did the dishes as Raven and I watched some TV until our little angel's eyes closed. I picked her up and laid her in bed, tucking her in and sealing her night with a kiss on her forehead.

I remember doing this every night when Levi was gone, and every night, she ran to my room, begging for Daddy to kiss her goodnight. I couldn't keep myself from crying when she did that. But now, I can relieve myself of that stress. Daddy was here to kiss her goodnight... and he would continue doing so.

"You can sleep on the couch, Erwin," I say to him as Levi went to kiss Raven goodnight.

He chuckles softly, walking to the couch. "How is it? With Levi in back in your life, I mean."

"He's still remembering things, which is great. It's a little difficult, but manageable. Why do you ask?"

"It's just... it's just me being selfish." He says with a sigh as he collapses on the couch. "I know it was only temporary, but I wish I was the one to be by your side. That I know for sure." Erwin bowed his head down in shame. "I wanted to love you. And I still want to be with you."

I sit next to him, not reaching out to him. "Erwin, I thank you for being there for me, but I can't go back to you. Not anymore."

"That I understand..." He looks at me with saddened eyes, "But I'm glad that you're happy and smiling like that. And I wish for the best for that little one," Erwin points to my stomach, which prompts me to rub it a bit. "Raven deserves to be a big sister."

"She's already a big sister. She just needs to practice that." I stand up, waving him goodbye, "I'll see you tomorrow morning for the rest of the unpacking, right? Not going to leave me in the morning?"

"As I used to? I promise not to."

That goddamn man...

I walked into the bedroom and saw Levi fixing the bed. What good is fixing it if we're going to ruin it by sleeping in it? I don't understand him at all. But otherwise, I still love him. We got into bed, and once his arms wrapped around me, we got to talking.

"Heard you talking to Erwin..."

"I assumed so. We were a bit loud."

"Do you still love him?"

I shook my head, turning over and facing him with a smile. With what little I could see without my glasses, I saw his saddened face. "No, I don't. I don't think I loved him when you were gone. I needed someone, and he was there. I was selfish... and I just... I made a mistake. And that mistake turned into that mess. I'm sorry, Levi... I just... lost myself."

He pushes himself closer to me, wrapping my arms around my torso. "Do you love me?"

"If I didn't, why would you be still in my bed alongside me?" I smirked, kissing his cheek before resting my head on his chest. His warm encompassing me. "I love you, Levi... and I know I made my mistake by sleeping with Erwin, but-."

"Why are you apologizing? I don't blame you. As I said before, I did the same thing with Petra. There's nothing for you to apologize for. Nothing. But I'm here now... we're going to make things better. A bit normal as well."

I nod my head, feeling myself drifting off. "I'm already liking this new normal."

*   *   *

"Mommy!" I jumped in my sleep as I woke up to see Raven waddling into the room. "Mommy, I wanna eat pancakes! Come on, Mommy, I'm hungry!"

I chuckle, about to drag myself out of bed when Levi gets up, swooping Raven into his arms. "Alright, leave Mommy alone. She needs sleep. I'll make pancakes."

"Mommy makes the best pancakes ever!"

"Well, I can make the best pancakes too, Raven."

"No, you can't."

"Yes, I can."

They walked away arguing about who can make the best pancakes as I sat in bed, debating to follow them. Just hearing their arguing doesn't make me angry... it makes me happy. A smile is plastered on my face, and I don't think it's ever leaving. 

When Levi wasn't here, whenever I woke up, there was this bliss of happiness where I never knew the pain of losing Jayden and Levi. Then this wave, no, a tsunami of hatred, anger, and sadness overwhelmed me. I'm just... happy now. I'm happy that Levi is back despite Jayden isn't.

Jayden is never going to fade away. You never forget that feeling when giving birth to a son, yet never having a son around. I can never forget it. Levi might, and so would Raven. But I will remember the pain and suffering I went through on that day. This baby... it's not going to replace him. I'll make sure of that.