GRAYSON

My fingers trembled as I began to unbutton my shirt.

Performing under pressure had never been a challenge for me. Adrenaline was usually the kick in the ass I needed to make sure that I hit every note, every key, every lace on the football.

But now, buttons kept slipping through my fingers left and right.

This was more than adrenaline.

Nessa was naked on the bed, tangled in the sheets. She still wore that orgasmic glow on her face, the one I gave her. And she watched me with slightly hooded eyelids as I tried to take my clothes off.

"I can help with that," she said.

A low laugh slipped out. "Don't you dare move a muscle, Adler."

Ignoring me, she immediately cupped her breasts, squeezing them. Goddamn you, Wednesday. This little display was not making functioning any easier.

"I'm pretty good with my hands, too, you know," she said.

At that, I froze. I gripped my shirt so tightly I damn near ripped it off. To hell with all of these buttons. I needed Nessa now. I'd been dreaming of this moment for so long. Not just the naked part or the dirty promises. But the openness. I dreamed of the version of Nessa who no longer hid. The version of Nessa who trusted me. The version of Nessa who was willing to give me everything.

That version was right in front of me.

Eventually, I managed to swallow. "I'm really enjoying the view right now, but thanks."

Nessa raked her eyes over me, and it only intensified how I ached for her.

"What do you want, Nessa?"

"I want you."

She said it so quickly that I nearly came right then and there.

I want you.

I shook my head, grinning slightly. "More specific, darling. We've been over this."

"I want to be yours."

"Tell me more."

She groaned, irritated. But then she said the most beautiful words.

"I'm yours, Grayson. I want everyone to know that I'm yours. And I want to be yours tonight." I pulled my shirt out of the waistband of my pants, and her eyes dropped before adding, "In bed."

Slowly, I unbuckled my pants. Her words had built me up, and all the trembles had vanished. Confidence stronger than ever before threaded through my veins. God, I was going to make her mine tonight. And I was going to do a hell of a good job while doing it.

"And what does my girl want in bed?" I asked, cocking a brow.

My girl, my girl, my girl, my fucking girl.

She looked like she wanted to punch me. "Why are you making me spell it out for you, asshole?"

I smiled.

"Because, Adler." I tugged my belt out of the loops on my pants and tossed it to the floor. "I've waited so fucking long for this. I want to make sure that we aren't just on the same page but the same goddamn line. The same word."

Nessa squirmed on the bed, her neediness showing even though she already came on my fingers a few minutes ago. I could still smell her. I could still taste her. Jesus fucking christ, I'd never been this hard before.

"Now tell me what you want," I demanded.

I needed to hear those words she'd kept locked up inside her for months.

Nessa's fiery gaze met mine. "I need you to fuck me."

Thank God. Finally.

"Then I'm going to fuck you," I said, shrugging my shirt off.

It was no surprise that we'd finally made it to this point, but I had never expected to feel this way. Our chemistry, our connection, all those things I spent so much time convincing Nessa of....they had absolutely nothing on our reality.

I paused, swallowing. "But I want you to know that this is so much more than fucking for me. You know that, right?"

She needed to know that.

It was so much more than sex. So much more than chemistry or connection.

This was love.

And not a plain and simple sort of love. It was complex and uncontrollable. The composition of our hearts was nothing short of intricate; I should know that better than anyone.

I was in love with Nessa Elez, and she needed to know. Especially because she hadn't answered me. She hadn't moved except for her eyes, which roved continuously over me while her lips remained barely parted, about to speak. The words weren't there, though. So I'd give her mine.

"No?" I cocked a brow. "Guess I need to tell you something, then."

Nessa gasped as I crawled over her on the bed, dropping low enough that my bare chest pressed against hers. I took one of her hands and then the other, lifting them over her head. My body screamed at me to stop what I was doing, to stop dragging the moment out. But I couldn't stop. Not now. Not when there was a chance that Nessa didn't know what I needed to tell her.

"Tell me after," she begged, and I couldn't tell if it was because she was anxious to be fucked or because she was terrified of what I had to say.

Either way, she wasn't going to persuade me away from this.

Once upon a time, a worthless lowlife took Nessa's heart and then her body and left her with nothing.

So now I was going to give her everything. My heart, my body, everything. And then I was going to stay. I would stay for as long as she'd let me.

This was so much more than fucking.

"No." I shook my head. "It has to be now. It has to be before."

"I really disagree. I think that—"

I kissed her, soundly shutting her up. She was scared, but she didn't need to be. This was real, the most real thing in my entire goddamn life. And I couldn't wait to create a safe place for her in my heart.

Regretfully, I let my lips slide off hers.

"I love you, Wednesday Adler Elez." The confession was the easiest thing I'd ever said. I swallowed a lump in my throat before kissing her again, softly. "I just wanted to tell you that I love you."

Nessa stared at me, unmoving. I watched as tears welled in the corner of her eyes. She tried to blink them away, but it was no use. And then she tried to talk, which was even more of a failure. A shiver of uncertainty ran through me.

"Shit, did I ruin it again by using Wednesday?"

"No." She immediately choked out a laugh, her lips spreading into a gorgeous smile. But then it fell slightly. "I guess it's just hard for me to believe."

I frowned. "Still, Nessa? You still don't believe in me?"

"It's not you, Grayson. I don't...I don't know how to believe in myself."

She was quick to reassure me, but it did nothing to push away the concern in my gut. She hadn't said the words back, but I didn't care about that. It only mattered that she believed mine. And believed she was worth loving.

Nessa tried to look away from me, so I released her wrists to grab her chin. She wasn't hiding. Not tonight. This version of Nessa didn't hide.

Her voice was quiet when she finally gave in and said more. "You love me?" she breathed. "Someone who's stubborn and difficult and struggles to find even those little bits of sunshine that I feel like everyone can find but me? Except for when I'm with you. I can find them when I'm with you."

God, how could she even question it?

From the very beginning, I believed in this girl with my whole heart. Nearly gave it up for her, too.

But she couldn't know that. She could never know that I'd ignored the warning signs my body gave me because I was too busy falling in love.

My irritation must have shown on my face because Nessa sucked in. "I'm sorry, Wilder," she whispered. "I'm trying—I'm trying to be better."

"Nessa, stop." I sighed raggedly, not able to listen to her apologize. "Did it feel amazing when you actually started to smile at me? Yes. Do I want you to be happy? Yes, of course. But I fell in love with who you are, not how you feel. I've always known who you are. And I don't want that to change."

Ever, Nessa. Don't ever change.

I brushed my lips over the tip of her nose and then her mouth. I wanted to brush love all over her.

"You're a good person, Nessa. Strong and loyal. Smart and beautiful. And I love you."

She shivered beneath me at the words, and I gathered her into my arms, falling to her side. She twisted to look at me, her lips parted, on the verge of saying something else. And because I didn't think I could handle it if she muttered even one more word of self-doubt, and because I was now bursting to tell her everything I'd been thinking and feeling for months, I cut her off.

"Actually, no." I shifted, looking down on her with the wildest grin. "Love isn't even enough for you, Nessa."

Shaking my head, I couldn't help but smile. But laugh. Fuck, I loved her. And maybe she didn't understand it yet, but I'd make sure she did. There were things in this life that I loved more than anything, but recently I'd learned that I didn't love them more than anyone. I couldn't love anything as much as I loved her.

"I love the key of G Major because it feels like a fantasy coming to life. I love the rush of adrenaline when I'm running toward the end zone. I love the smell of coffee, even though I hate the taste of it. I love it, Nessa, because it reminds me of you. Because I don't just love you, Nessa. I am wildly in love with you. My heart...fuck, sometimes I think it only beats because you make it."

Nessa was crying now. Fully, beautifully crying. She lifted a hand to my chest, placing it over my heart. And I knew she was coming to terms with it—how much it was all for her. Her eyes wandered over me, wondering if this was all real.

But it was. It was.

"Grayson, I—"

I lifted a finger to her lips, cutting her off.

"I just wanted you to know," I whispered with a smile. "I needed you to know before I do what I want to do to you. I needed you to know why I'm here and why I want you. And that I'm not going anywhere afterward."

Awe filtered into Nessa's expression, and I knew she finally understood. Especially when she began tracing my chest with a single fingertip. Tracing my heart.

"When Julian told me...when Julian told me that you were born with a heart defect, I didn't believe it," she said. "How could something, someone so perfect...."

I shook my head. "It's not perfect. But it's yours."

Nessa's eyes grew even wider.

Yes, baby. Yes, it's yours. Get used to it.

"Will you let me show you?" I murmured huskily. I hadn't forgotten that she was naked beside me. My blood coursed like a wildfire through my veins, unstoppable.

Nessa nodded wordlessly.

I hovered over her mouth, poised to take it again. "I need to hear it, Adler."

"Show me," she finally choked out, begging. "Please. Please show me. I want to show you, too."

My eyes locked on hers, and heat flowed between us until I couldn't bear it. Words were important. But so were other things.

I kissed her lips first. And then her neck before dropping to her breasts and her stomach. I nipped at her inner thigh, licking up the mess we'd made earlier, enjoying her taste on my tongue. I licked and sucked and kissed until she writhed beneath my touch. My name rolled off her tongue repeatedly, telling me everything I needed to know about how she felt about me.

Nessa wouldn't strip down like this for anyone. Not a single person. Except me.

Her hands shook as she suddenly grabbed at my pants, fumbling with the zipper. Her eagerness ignited me, and I helped her fling my pants and briefs to the floor. Nessa didn't waste another damn second before wrapping that pretty little hand around my cock, and hell.

I hovered over her, barely holding myself back from diving in. I needed to close that final distance between us. She was so...perfect beneath me. So perfect and so ready.

"Do we need protection?" I asked, breathing heavily.

It was a damn miracle that I was thinking clearly enough to even ask.

"No." She shook her head. "And I'm clean. I haven't even been with anyone in a long time."

My vision swam before me. I might pass out at just the idea of taking Nessa raw.

"Me, too," I assured her. "Fuck, sinking into you is going to be like—"

I dropped my head, unable to finish the sentence because of the sudden burst of arousal and need coursing through me. I grabbed the pillow next to her head, fisting it.

"Like?" she gasped, her eyes bright and wanting.

With a smile, I lifted my head again, letting my hands drag over her body. Sculpting it. "Like fucking heaven." I nudged a leg between her thighs. "Now open up for me, Adler."

She did. And then she stroked me again, rubbing her thumb over the head of my cock. Oh, God. Did she have any idea what she was doing to me?

"You gotta be careful there, baby," I groaned.

Nessa, as usual, ignored me. She traced a finger up my length and bit down on her lip, uncertainty in her gaze. "You're so...."

Big, darling? I know.

I barely bit back a satisfied smirk. Instead, I flexed my hips, inching into her wetness. I knew she wanted me, but feeling it like this? I moaned loudly.

"It fit in your mouth. It'll fit in your pussy."

It had been the wrong thing to say because now we were both clearly thinking about when Nessa sucked me off in my car. And I didn't need anything else to fuel the fire within me right now. I was barely keeping my shit together as it was.

"I wanted to make you feel good," she said, her voice lowering.

I groaned through clenched teeth. "You did, Adler. God, you did. But now it's time to make both of us feel that way. You want that?"

She nodded, whimpering as she threw her arms around my neck. I felt her spread her legs a touch further. It wasn't enough, though.

"Then be a good girl and tilt your hips up, darling," I urged.

Nessa did without hesitating, and I slid in slowly. God. She gripped me like a vice, all hot and wet and tight. Nessa inhaled sharply, and that nearly did me in, hearing her reaction to having me inside her. It was killing me not to immediately thrust deeper, but I wanted to let Nessa adjust. Her eyes were wide, her lips parted, and I knew she was taking it in. Fuck, she was taking it.

"Like heaven?" she asked quietly.

My eyes rolled back, my vision once again blurring. "Christ, Adler—"

"Just go, baby."

I swore beneath my breath—a mixture of relief and need. I drew out of her pussy slightly before thrusting in again, hard enough that Nessa's body buckled into the mattress beneath me. She clenched around me, and I rocked into her another time, chasing more. More of her. More of this. I kissed her roughly, tangling my tongue with hers until we both had to break away to breathe.

"Are you okay?" I rasped, holding myself deep inside her for a moment.

"No," she muttered, and I froze. What—

"I just hate how good this feels," she added, tangling her fingers into my hair. "I hate how wrong I was about you."

Goddamn her, driving me to the brink over and over again.

"Shut up," I growled, pulling back and screwing my cock in deeper. "You love it."

Nessa cried out, and I knew I'd found that spot that would make her fall apart. So I hit it repeatedly until she swore into the crook of my neck.

"Tell me, Nessa," I groaned, desperate.

"What?" she gasped.

I pulled back, looking down at her in all her beauty. I rolled my hips slowly, trying to pull back so I could savor the moment.

"Tell me you love it," I demanded.

"I love it."

I thought I heard something else when she said those words, and the look she gave me was reassuring. A reassurance that what I'd heard was true.

With a loud grunt, I grabbed Nessa's hips and flipped us over. I thrust upward to re-enter her once she was straddling me, and she cried out, eyes rolling up. God, that was satisfying.

A cocky grin slid into place as I watched her. "I needed to see you on top of me."

Surprisingly, Nessa's smile matched my own as she braced herself against my chest and began slowly riding me. This—this was a moment made for fantasies. Sweat dotted her brow, and her hair flowed in disarray around her face. Her eyes were bright with desire and something else I thought I might recognize.

Nessa sped up, stroking my cock with her tight pussy. She leaned forward, testing different angles, and I had to keep myself in check when her tits bounced right in front of my face.

And then she dared to ask, "How do I look?"

"Gorgeous, Adler." I lifted my head to kiss her. "I'm trying so hard not to come right now. You have no idea."

Nessa bore down, kissing me back and quickening her pace even more. I'd never seen her let go to this extent, never seen her chase something she wanted this badly. And knowing that what she wanted was me? Goddamn.

I grabbed her hips and bucked up, driving as deep as possible. I met her stroke for stroke. I gave it to her harder than she was to me, our skin slapping and drowning out the sounds of Nessa's tiny whimpers and pants.

"I love you," I breathed. "Shit, I love you."

"Grayson." Desperation reached her eyes, and I pounded her faster.

She could stop chasing it now. I was here, and I would give it to her. I would give her everything.

"That's it, baby," I rasped, slipping one hand between us so I could find her clit. "Take it."

I watched the heat explode in Nessa's eyes. I felt it as she clenched around me, her orgasm rolling over her in continuous waves. And then I met her there, crying my release as I emptied all I had into her.

There was nothing—nothing like it. Nothing like her.

When Nessa collapsed onto my chest, I rolled us over and gently rocked into her one more time. I didn't want it to be over yet. Nessa's hot cries still rang in my ear, warming me from head to toe. Such beautiful sounds.

"I could write symphonies about the sounds you make when you come," I whispered in her ear. "Wild, beautiful symphonies."

Nessa smiled, nearly cracking my chest open.

She smiled. Because I loved her.

And she knew it.