My heels ticked along the floor as we wandered the finite freedom that my Sword had granted us. Askar held my hand, and I was happy for the fact. I swept my thumb over his as much as I could.

"I am sorry about Ser Willoughby," I told him as we rounded the corner. I tried to speak quietly, though I didn't think that we were followed. Luckily, Willough had given us the longest hall.

"I don't mind him," Askar said. "I've had some time alone with your knight, and he's an interesting man."

"A fact," I nodded. "Look. About the Hunt..."

"I kind of wonder if I should have partaken. I'm certain I'd have won. Truth be told, Krist hadn't even seen the pheasant until I pointed it out to him."

"Ha! No," I disagreed. "I like that you did not hunt."

"Is that so? And why is that?" he asked. "Did you not wish to dance with me?"

"A funny consideration, seeing as I danced immediately with you tonight. And because... I just like who you are," I said. "And I want you to feel welcomed in my home because you are welcomed.... Also, I really like birds."

"Thank you," he said. "I did get that impression. Thus far, your family has greeted me with open arms. Your father went as far as to say he liked me, and even if he says that to everyone, I wear it as a badge of honor."

"He does really like you," I confessed. "It's certainly not every day that he insists upon someone's arrival here."

"I really like him."

"I cannot express how important that is to me, or how good it feels to hear... Or how badly I feel in return because your mother was not as happy to receive me."

"My mother will warm to you," he said. "She knows I am here. She knows why I am here. As I said, she is simply careful. I am her only child."

"It must be hard," I said. "Is she lonely when you are gone so long?"

"The castle is often empty, yes, but she travels. She sees her sister; she has friends in Blythe. She is a woman of many occupations and skills. Though, I suspect she should be very happy to redirect her attention should the duchy require her for something else."

"Something else?" I asked.

He flashed his teeth defeatedly. "I was referring to children. If that is something you've considered since our last discussion of it?"

"Oh, of course," I said. I thought about Krist and his want for kids. "How many do you require?" I asked instead.

He thought about it. "I need a son," he said. "But how long that takes, or if we have more, I want to decide together."

"Like..." There was a buzzing in my lips and in my cheeks, dreaming of it, but then all I could hear was:

"We've talked about our wedding. What dress I'll wear, how many kids we want... I–"

"Love?" he asked.

"Sorry," I muttered. "I was just thinking of something, is all."

We passed by a couple of frames that hung on the wall, and I felt reminded of his gallery in Gosil.

"There's no sunlight here," I joked.

"What?" Askar turned to follow where I looking, the first of the portraits.

"The windows are stained," I told him, pointing over us. "No sunlight fades the paint."

"Ah." Pensive, he looked over the woman's face.

"Do you remember... at your home, you showed me the canvas of your father? And you told me were named after him?" I asked.

"That was a month ago, at best. I should hope I remember," he teased.

I tsked my tongue. "Well, we're in my home now, and... My father says I should tell you what it means to be an Oreian woman. ...Do you wish to see whom I was named after?"

"Your grandmother?" he asked.

"Yes."

"Yes," he said. "I really do."

"Alright... but you'll have to venture off the path to see her," I said.

He smirked, turning at the waist. "Ah. I see you've baited me to misbehave?"

"Who? Me? No," I teased. "We can stay here if you like...?"

The Duke glanced down the corridor, then back at me. "I'd hate to disappoint the King. If I follow you, thus destroying the rapport I have with Ser Willoughby, what do I get in return?"

"A special tour not open to the public," I said.

He stepped closer and slunk an arm around my waist. "And what else? A kiss as well?"

My inhale was sharp. "Y-Yes, I think that would be okay. More if you want it."

He let go and went in the direction I had insisted. "This way?" he asked.

I pouted. "I thought you were going to kiss me?"

"I am," he promised. "But I'd like to see the portrait first."

We took that hallway, followed by another, moving quickly to make up for time. Ask looked nervous, and I reminded him that everyone was busy dancing at the ball. He cracked a joke about our knight coming to find us, and I laughed.

"Don't worry," I promised him. "He's mostly talk. The only souls who haunt this part of the castle are my mother and Ser Elías, and I think I saw them dancing with each other before we left."

"Yes, I saw that, too," he said. "I thought it was fun. Your Lord Commander seems very serious, but with her, he's a different kind of man. Are they close?"

"Unbelievably," I explained. "I swear I've seen them conduct entire conversations with one another from across the room, using only their eyes."

"I believe it. When you've been through something with someone, anticipating their response becomes second nature. For example, Frid and I can do it somewhat."

"I remember the faire," I said. "And when you arrived with him here... I was meaning to ask... How is Ser Whiskers? I didn't see him amongst your party."

"Whiskers went home to his wife," he said. "He offered to come, but it's been a long summer. He needs to be there instead."

"That's noble of you," I told him. "Also, he clearly can't be trusted not to try and dance with other ladies. There are many ladies here."

"He never goes too far," Ask returned. "Not that I condone it, but..."

"I should be very jealous if you dance with another woman when we are–" I stopped.

"Hmm?" he asked.

"Mm? Nothing."

He chuckled. "Whatever you say. So. What about your staff?" he asked.

"What about them?"

"Will they not find it peculiar if we are wandering about unescorted?" he asked.

"And here I thought you'd be happy I'd snuck off with you," I said. "They're busy, I would wager. Most of everyone is passing in and out of the Grand Hall and the garden. We might encounter a stray, but if they do speak to anyone, it will hopefully be to Ser Willoughby."

"What if it's your mother?"

"I doubt they'll speak to her directly, but that does raise a very good point. They could speak to Eli, in which case... Well. It was nice knowing you. It's this way... We're almost there."

I picked my hem to take the mini flight of steps onto the half landing that my namesake was close to.

"You have many more paintings than we do," he noted.

"And likely a few more hidden away in these forgotten rooms. I've recently become aware that my brother's been commissioning our painter, Mr. Henrik, for landscapes."

Askar nodded. "Is he a nature lover?" he asked.

"He's a Mr. Henrik lover," I said.

"Oh?" the Duke asked. "I suppose that is a reason to hire a painter, if any. Does this Mr. Henrik know of his affection?"

"The collective idea is that he'd have to be very stupid to not have."

"That's an accusation."

"My brother is as subtle as a hoof to the groin," I told him. "Sure, Willoughby brought it to my attention, but in hindsight it's very obvious. Whenever Will sees him, he gets... just completely silly. And I feel silly having taken so long to notice, but in my defense, I am not the target of this attention. If someone loved me like that, I like to think I'd know."

"Does Mr. Henrik love Willem back?" Ask wondered.

"I've never asked," I said. "But, I do hope to discover that soon."

"Then is the Prince going to declare himself?" he asked. "Or is that strictly a man to a woman thing?"

"In the past, courtship has been men to woman, but love was only legally redefined within the last few years. Willem wants to do it right, he says. He wants to declare himself. Whether he does or not, I'm not sure. Sometimes he is impulsive."

Ask stood next to me, looking at the art. "Who is this?"

"This? This is my great, great grandfather King Nikhail," I told him. "You have him to thank for the Hunt. He introduced it as a way for knights to burn off their stress. Also, the modern structure of the Games you'll see if you come for the summer. He was a military man."

"Ah." He pretended to tip a hat. "Thank you, sir, for the Hunt and Games."

I snickered, moving on to the next, each name bringing us further up the L-shaped stairs. "Actually, all the men of my family are military-minded. The women, too. This bearded fellow is my great grandfather King Niklaus... and this is his son, my grandfather, King Nikolai."

"Quite original in their names, aren't they?" he asked.

"Said Ash Leaf the Second," I cracked.

"You've got me there, I'm afraid."

"And this..." The top of the stairs was hers. "This is his wife and my grandmother, Queen Eliza Eisson... formally Lady Eliza Rós."

"Rós... Eliza Rose. Feels lazy to make the same joke twice, but how original," he said.

"Yes, we are very clever, and you've solved the big mystery of where my middle name came from. Be happy I wasn't named after a bird."

He half-laughed, half-groaned at that. The Duke smiled at me, and even though I had been alone with Askar more often than my thoughts, I felt shy and unarmored standing next to him.

"Did you know that by the time Eliza was my age, she had won my grandfather's heart, and they were married?"

He watched me. "I did know about this. Their competition was quite renowned."

"For its absurdity," I murmured.

"Your words," he added.

"It was something another empire had done the year before; I'm told—one of the southern isles. I guess my grandfather thought it would be fun. He was a little eccentric, I think. Though no one really speaks ill of the dead around here. But. Thirty ladies. Thirty trials. Things from etiquette to writing prose and riding horseback. And she won. Apparently, in a great lead, too."

"If I may be candid?" he asked.

"Always," I said. "I always want you to be candid with me."

"A contest feels like a stupid way to find a wife," he said.

"Goslin men purchase theirs," I replied.

He shifted. "Eh, well, if they were happy. Who am I to judge?"

I looked at her again. "Everyone knows about the trials, the 'Ladies' Games,' they call it, but did you know that before she died, she sanctioned a school?"

"A school?"

"Yes, for little girls. Previously, ladies were always taught by private tutors or governesses within their homes. This school changed things. Or helped to. I've never met a person who asked me about that. They always want to know about how she managed to stay on her horse through the storm at the pier, but they never ask about the school. I can only guess that the lot of people don't know it was her idea. The Crown took credit for it, perhaps? But it was her idea. I found her notebook here, in the tower: all her ideas and their purposes. And the place is still standing. It's not far from the Rós Estate in North Áire. If you'd ever like to go... well, when I am married, I inherit land near Dawne. I would be happy for you to see it. It's something I've longed to visit again."

"When we are married, we will visit any time you like," the Duke said. "Your grandmother sounds remarkable, and we should celebrate her life."

"She was remarkable, I like to think. As remarkable as she could be in the short time she had here. I didn't know her. She died before I was born, so it feels strange to make a big deal about it or care."

"I'm sorry to hear that you never met her, but it's not strange."

"I would be sorry, too, but the rite we did... I meant to tell you... I was so very comforted by your prayer in the woods, that I've applied it to many things since... If her life was part of a bigger picture or some sort of balance? A promise of a brighter future...? I could find peace with that, and then the length of her presence would matter less than its purpose."

He paused. "Take her notes with us to Gosil. We will introduce something similar there."

"You would..." I gawked. "Askar... I couldn't make you do that."

"Your dreams are my dreams, love," he said. "Your prayers," he added.

"I would like that very much." I folded my hands. "And I like that you say... when we are married." I pointed to the frame across from my grandmother, but it was empty. "My mother's portrait will go there when she steps down or dies. The canvas is currently hanging in her study. Just over the desk. My father's is in there, too, on the opposite wall, so she can 'look at him while she works,' she said."

"That's sweet," he mused.

"By my age, Her Majesty had broken laws and reconfigured a treaty just to marry my father. My parents are soulmates, and Mama knew it and refused to let that go. She knew herself well enough to defy court and class and every predetermined expectation just to be with whom she felt she was meant to be. Fate, she'll call it to this day if you ask her, but whatever the mechanism was responsible, God or luck, she did it. And nothing stood a chance in her way...."

"Do you worry you won't live up to that?" he asked. "Finding your soulmate? Or defying expectations?"

"Both..." I confessed. "Though one of those I... I may have done..."

His shoulders eased.

"But," I added. "Still, the women of my family, the mares they call us, we are known to be especially tenacious. The idea is so close to fact that it feels as though I am doing something wrong by just existing as I am. My mother and her mother, they had these identities outside of who they married. They were queens. And for the entirety of my life, I believed that I would somehow inherit the Crown because of that, in spite of my birth order. It's not that I wanted it. In fact, I was always scared Willem would actually step down, but it's that... they cast this, this certain shade over me, and I am subjected in their incredible light. It's as though... It's like they are the Sun and I...? I am whatever's left in the shadow somewhere."

"That isn't true," he said. "You are not left in their shadows."

"Aren't I?" I asked.

"You are an incredible woman, Eliza," he said. "You surprise me every day, and I am not easily surprised."

"Askar... Did you mean what you said? That you... That you loved me?"

"Yes." He moved closer.

"I need to..." I took an uncertain breath. "I desperately wish to say these words to you, but I'm terrified."

"No," he tried. "There's nothing to be scared of. I would not hurt you."

"My brother will be King," I told him. "And even if he does not produce an heir, Sam, through order, would be next. Delilah is already pregnant. I may never matter here. I'm sure my Dowry is large, but... Am I enough?"

"You matter everywhere," he whispered.

"But I cannot give you a crown, and I know that is important to men of stature," I said.

"It is important to men of small stature, not me," he explained. "I never wanted you for the Crown, and if we ever want one so badly, I shall buy us a matching set."

"But you said that the offer your parents made was–"

"I wanted you," he said. "It sounds invented, it sounds insane, but from the moment you were arguing with your brother in Town Square over taffy and teeth, since the moment your father nearly bludgeoned me with his sword–"

"It's a controlled demonstration," I groaned.

He snickered, shaking his head. "I have wanted you. Only you."

"But... you didn't know me."

"Our souls knew each other," he replied. "And when I saw you, mine recognized yours, even if I didn't."

"That is... That is incredibly romantic, Your Grace," I said.

"And it recognized you again when we were strangers our first night and then again when we made love on the beach. You are scared to expose your heart to me; I will never wound it. You are the missing half of mine."

Our lips nearly touched; I could feel my hands shake. I pressed them into his chest for stability. "...If I say these words," I whispered. "...If I admit that I... If we wed... I have to go to Gosil. Yes?"

He stilled, drawing back. "I am required there, but my home is your home. You can change whatever you wish about it. Curtains, floors, the gardens. I'll devote whichever rooms to you that you like, buy you whatever furniture or clothes. Horses. Flowers. Anything you want. It's yours."

"I don't want those things," I said.

"What do you want?" he asked. "Name it. I am begging you."

"I... I want you," I breathed. "I want you; I want the life you see for us, but I'm scared that..."

"Tell me," he begged. He swept his hand across my cheek, bringing me toward him. "Tell me, my love."

"I'm scared to leave home," I said. "Maybe this courage I've longed for it just a dream? Maybe I'm not like other mares? My mother risked a war; she escaped fire and brimstone. There are men that would die for her, and people trust her every whim just because of how well she's led them in the past. How strong she was. My grandmother? She left home to win the heart of a man she didn't know, who was not known for his softness, yet if you ask Ser Elías or anyone who knew the pair, they'll tell you how much the King adored her. You see how Father feels for Mother. How much Oreia loves them both. And I... What have I done, Askar? What is so grand about me that people should love or follow me here, let alone in a nation I don't know? Why should the Sons and Daughters of Gosil trust me? What if they believe I'm unworthy or just some... some northern whore?"

"Any man who uttered those words would face my wrath," he said. "But off the cuff...? You've chased a dragon across the borders to help us," he said. "Our people will know that."

"But it wasn't a real dragon, was it?" I asked.

He laughed. "Reality is perception. You didn't know it wasn't real."

"I had my suspicions, Askar. It's a dragon. ...I don't know; I sound like a lunatic!" I cried. "The Crown is just all I've ever expected in life and knowing that I won't inherit it, that I'm free from it... I feel confused. I love this empire more than I love myself, and I dont know... I don't know that I deserve her... And I'm scared I don't deserve yours. I'm scared that if I tell you I lov–" I stopped, resting my hand on the handle of the door beside us. "I'm scared that's when this ends." 

"The only time you can be brave is when you're scared," he said.

I glanced back at him. "Where did you pick that up?" I asked.

"Willoughby," he said.

"Of course you did. He got that from my father, you know?" I exhaled. "Do you know the tower that you see when you approach the castle from the Capitol?" I asked. He nodded. "This is the door that leads us there. It faces the sea."

He met my eyes.

"It's my favorite place in the whole world. It's my refuge. It's what I will miss most about this old rock when I leave it, and... and I want you to see it. I want to show you how important it is so that when..." My heart was hammering. "If you ask me to marry you, you'll see how much I... Will you come with me?"

He nodded. "I'm honored you would ask."

"It's very quaint," I said. We went inside the room and shut the door.