Jackie scooted back his chair, but I grabbed his arm.

"Don't!" I exclaimed quietly so I wouldn't draw their attention.

"Don't you see, they think we are on a date, so they came here together. Lydia can't stand Michael, she would never be interested in him" I continued.

"And how the fuck do you know?" he challenged back sitting down.

I couldn't really reveal how, but throughout my pregnancy I told Lydia everything: How Michael treated me, not picking up calls, not showing up to appointments, and not being honest with his parents.

"I don't, but ignore it. If you feed into it, you are showing them you care." I quickly recovered.

"Damn it, Tayler I do! I love your cousin" Jackie said looking me straight in my eyes.

Just then I saw fire in his eyes, the flames engulfed Lydia as Michael held her close.

I have to admit I was a bit envious for a minute. Michael and I had a better relationship, we weren't adulterers. Why don't I see passion in Michael's eyes anymore?

"And you think I don't love Michael, think about this Jackie!"

This air was tight, it crushed my lungs and made my true feelings for Michael spew out of my mouth.

No matter how hard I try, I crave Michael. My body aches for him, my lips yearn for his, and my heart still calls out in hopes he would answer back.

Jackie looked in my eyes and put his head down sighing.

I looked across the room and I locked eyes with Michael. I'm surprised he could see me the way Lydia was up on him.I looked away hoping I was fast enough that he would forget I even had my attention on him.

"Two can play this game, what do you say?" Jackie asked.

"Huh?" was all I managed to say because I was distracted by the eyes of my ex lover.

"Two can play at this game, you playing?" Jackie mischievously smirked at me with a raised brow.

I took some seconds to think. I'm tired of Michael having control over me, time to cut the strings from my arms and do what I want.

I nodded and lowered my eyes to make them look flirty, I put my finger in a come here motion for Jackie and he looked shocked.

Not time to back out on me now Jackie.

Jackie scoots his chair closer to me and put his long arm around me, placing his other hand on top of mine.

I peeked to see Lydia giggling and close to Michael's ear and he sat there cheesing like a Cheshire cat.

Don't react Tayler! don't get up and choke them with your baby's umbilical cord.

Time to kick it up a notch. I pretended to whisper in Jackie's ear while playing with the buttons on his shirt, I inched back just to bite my lip.

I looked down and Jackie's dick was protruding through his bell bottoms.

What the hell?! I told you to play, not let me play with it.

"I'm so sorry baby, but you don't know what you do to me" Jackie seductively said in my ear.

He placed a chaste kiss on my cheek.

I was shook to my core and the seat of my panties were wet with my own juices. I don't know what made me hot someone talking dirty to me or someone talking dirty to me while my ex watched.

I haven't gotten any sex in seven months 26 days, 17 hours, 36 minutes, and 15 seconds; but who's counting?

He begin to plant a few kisses behind my ear, then on my neck.

Thank God Jackie requested we be placed a way from the other guests at this restaurant, not because he was a Jackson but because I didn't want any attention on my belly.

Jackie was really sweet for that.

What am I thinking? I'm in love with Michael and Jackie is married. Besides, he's messing with my cousin I can't do that to her.

I don't want to play this game anymore.

I looked up to see Michael and Lydia staring at us.

"Jackie stop we made our point."

He kept nuzzling my neck.

"Jackie stop!" I said aloud.

He kept rubbing me till he made his way to my thigh having a tight hold on it.

"Stop it Jackie."

I pushed him as hard as I could and stood up.

Just as I grabbed my bag I was confronted by Lydia while Michael confronted Jackie.

"I guess blood don't mean nothing to you" Lydia started.

She folded her arms eyeing me.

I looked around and back at her sighing.

I was so annoyed, I ignored the pain I was experiencing in my lower back and my abdomen.

"Popping your gums with that jive talk about Jackie you wanted him for yourself." Lydia snapped at me.

"Maybe those shoes you have on are a little too tight and they're fucking with the oxygen that needs to get your brain, I don't want Jackie!" I argued.

"Sure didn't look like it to me, all you do is hop from Jackson to Jackson." Lydia stepped a little closer to me.

"You are the one to talk! You got a good ass man at home, while you chasing behind a married one!"

I was so ensued by my anger that I didn't even hear or see Michael and Jackie wrestling around grunting and groaning. Without thinking about the condition I'm in I went over to pry Michael's hands from Jackie's throat, but he wasn't budging. Then Jackie pushed him and Michael fell into me, this really pushed me over the edge.

"STOP IT!" I shouted.

They all looked at me like I had three heads.

All this excitement has caused my blood pressure to go through the roof. I was pissed to the highest pissitivity.

"You guys look dumb rolling around this wouldn't have happened if dumb number one and dumb number two didn't accuse me and Jackie of messing around. Unlike you two, Jackie has pushed me to keep singing and even let me record in the studio, not to get back at you Mike, but help me get back to my first love; music. Lydia you are dumber than you look if you think I would trade in our friendship or betray my cousin for some dick! Ask Jackie I told him I couldn't stand him for what he has done to you, I didn't even want to come here with him, but he wanted to celebrate with me because I cut two tracks today. Now if you weren't busy hopping from Jackson to Jackson you would know your cousin better and be there when I need you the most. And you-" I turned to Michael shaking my head.

"I hope you feel the most dumb, if you were around like you were supposed to be you would know what was going on you would be the one to help me, not your brother. Michael I can finally look at you and see no love in your eyes for me, I can finally look at you and say I don't love you anymore. I'm done being pushed to the side, being left in the dark, being left alone its time for me to live for me and my son, you just have to get used to that. As of now I'm done with all of you. As for you Jackie I'll have my lawyer call to work out some things regarding the song." I finished.

I adjusted my bag on my shoulder and walked off, headed to the nearest bus stop.

I meant what I said I'm done with everyone, especially Michael.

~

I thought I was done with the Jacksons for a while, but I remembered I left my car at the Encino house.

"I'm so sorry about that Baby Doll" Henry said.

I just nodded I was in so much pain, I couldn't even speak.

After catching two buses to the Jacksons' house and walking, I finally got to the gate and Henry yet again tried to deny me access.

I snatched Henry up out of the booth so quick it made his fucking head spin, Henry old ass was messing with the grim reaper. I was going to reap his ass if he didn't leave me alone. Lets just say he learned his lesson.

I had too much shit to deal with and I was experiencing shocks of pains throughout my body.

When we got to the front of the house, I thanked Henry for the ride. I slowly got out of the cart exhaling and inhaling, thinking that the pain would subside if I breathed a certain way.

Just as I put my key in the door to unlock it, LaToya came out of the door and called out to me.

This big head bitch!

I'm sorry Lord but I'm in too much pain why can't people leave me alone right now? Hopefully we make this quick cause Lord you know all she does is run them gums.

I walked up to the front steps and plastered a smile on my face.

"Hey, what's up?" I greeted her.

I shifted my weight a few times because of the sharp pains.

"Hey how are you? is something wrong? you look uncomfortable. Do you want to sit down?" She asked.

"No thank you, I'm just really tired and want to get home. Why did you call me over?"

I was really trying hard not to come off as being rude, but I'm in some much pain. I'm trying my best to be friendly because LaToya is really sweet and we were close friends before this pregnancy.

I just want to get away from the world and the stupid people in it. Plus it doesn't help LaToya and Michael look so much alike.

"Oh-oh-yeah, you're right. I'm so sorry to hold you up. I just want to talk to you very briefly, I mean if you want, you can come back another day?" LaToya suggested.

"If you don't know by now the big bad Joe doesn't want me here and I won't be here for a good while, my-my baby is due any day now and I'm going to be in mommy mode ya'know." I tried to think of something because the truth is the Jackson brothers are what is keeping me from coming back here, I could give two cricket shits about Joe.

"Oh, well the baby is actually what I wanted to talk to you about. I don't mean to pry, I really don't but I have to be truthful this situation is bugging me." She rambled.

This should be good, I stood back and braced myself for what is to come out of Toya's mouth.

"Are you pregnant with Michael's baby?" she asked me.

I wanted to say you should ask Michael, but some part of me still wanted to protect him from the backlash he would face. Not only that I already dug myself a hole.

Shit! I already jumped in that bitch covered myself with the dirt and took a dirt nap so there is no need to tell the truth now. No matter how mad I am at Michael.

"For someone who sure doesn't want to pry you are prying. As long as I'm not pregnant by you that's all that matters now keep your nose out of my business."

Damn it! I didn't want to be rude, but why does it matter? Your brother denies him so guess what? It isn't his.

I made this baby by myself.

"Listen, I apologize- you know what I don't. I'm so tired of you and Michael treating me like crap because I want you to be honest and you two want to continue lying to Mother and Joseph and your family! I heard you and Michael on the phone one night, I know you weren't raped by anyone. I am the bad guy because I think you have enough on your plate and I think my family being involved especially Michael being there is a good idea? No you're the bad guy because you concocted this story to tell us about you being raped, have you no shame? You know how many women wrongfully accuse men who will spend the rest of their life behind bars because they lie or how many men get off when they actually rape a woman and you use this to your advantage?-"

"You don't know what you're talking about LaToya, now I'm going to tell you to but out of my business, I wouldn't want to tell Mother about you sneaking boys over while your brothers are on tour and your Mother is asleep now do I? Now you can be a church girl all you want, but if you get in my way again you better give Jehovah your heart because your ass will belong to me."

LaToya was a bit taken aback.

"Look I didn't mean to hurt your feelings, we were friends I just want us to be there for you." LaToya added.

She handed me a piece of paper.

"Its my number call me when you want to talk, I'll be here for you."

I snatched it from her hoping it would rip.

"Oh don't be nice now cause I threatened to air your dirty laundry, just know I got your number Ms. Jackson."

I sped walked to my car, damn near ripping my door off the hinges once I got it unlocked. I started up the car and pressed my foot on the gas not looking back. I exited out the gate and pulled over to the side and let everything out.

"AGGGGHHHHH-AHHHHH!" I hollered as I beat the steering wheel crying.

LaToya is right, she was right. Her words mixed with my guilt made me feel like the most vile human being on this planet. Michael made me feel like the most useless, Jackie made me feel like some cheap whore, and Lydia made me feel like I can't trust anyone. I let out all of my emotions. I cried for my guilt, I cried for my broken heart, I cried for my parents, I cried for my unborn baby, I cried for Michael, and I cried myself.